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'Divinity Consultants' are Now Designing Sacred Rituals for Some Corporations (nytimes.com) 315

"They go by different names: ritual consultants, sacred designers, soul-centered advertisers," reports the New York Times, describing "a new corporate clergy" working as "divinity consultants" and "designing sacred rituals for corporations."

They have degrees from divinity schools. Their business is borrowing from religious tradition to bring spiritual richness to corporate America. In simpler times, divinity schools sent their graduates out to lead congregations or conduct academic research. Now there is a more office-bound calling: the spiritual consultant. Those who have chosen this path have founded agencies — some for-profit, some not — with similar-sounding names: Sacred Design Lab, Ritual Design Lab, Ritualist.

They blend the obscure language of the sacred with the also obscure language of management consulting to provide clients with a range of spiritually inflected services, from architecture to employee training to ritual design. Their larger goal is to soften cruel capitalism, making space for the soul, and to encourage employees to ask if what they are doing is good in a higher sense. Having watched social justice get readily absorbed into corporate culture, they want to see if more American businesses are ready for faith. "We've seen brands enter the political space," said Casper ter Kuile, a co-founder of Sacred Design Lab. Citing a Vice report, he added: "The next white space in advertising and brands is spirituality...."

Ezra Bookman founded Ritualist, which describes itself as "a boutique consultancy transforming companies and communities through the art of ritual," last year in Brooklyn. He has come up with rituals for small firms for events like the successful completion of a project — or, if one fails, a funeral. "How do we help people process the grief when a project fails and help them to move on from it?" Mr. Bookman said. Messages on the start-up's Instagram feed read like a kind of menu for companies who want to buy operational rites a la carte: "A ritual for purchasing your domain name (aka your little plot of virtual land up in the clouds)." "A ritual for when you get the email from LegalZoom that you've been officially registered as an LLC."

The articles notes there are problems when combining the corporate with the religious.

For one thing, "It's hard to exhort workers to give their professional activities transcendental meaning when, at the same time, those workers can be terminated."
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'Divinity Consultants' are Now Designing Sacred Rituals for Some Corporations

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  • by locater16 ( 2326718 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @02:42AM (#60457630)
    Priest "All Hail the great one, bringer of the UI, creator of the product launch, apostle of the touchscreen"
    Congretation "All hail Steve Jobs, the one true creator. May his legacy bring us stock rises."
    • You mean Hail the Great Beast, Devourer of Worlds [dhmontgomery.com]. Mgt.consultants have been doing ritualistic things forever, and the "consultants" have been around for millennia. Or at least since before 4,004BC.
      • by AntronArgaiv ( 4043705 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @05:50AM (#60457924)

        Gotta hand it to the divinity grads for hustle. With fewer opportunities in mainline religion, nothing wrong with being creative and trying to broaden the market for your skills.

        I'm not buying into "corporate ritualism", but then, I'm an engineer. The only deity we believe in is Murphy.
        And the pantheon of UNIX/Linux deities, of course. However, I'm sure there will be enthusiasm amongst the HR "people people" for something new and different.

    • The Heretic and Blasphemer can offer no excuse for their crimes. Those who are pardoned merely live to further shroud Humanity from the Light of the CEO with the Darkness of their souls

  • Really? (Score:4, Insightful)

    by ClueHammer ( 6261830 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @02:50AM (#60457644)
    Time to grow up mankind. Stop making up BS!
  • Yep (Score:5, Insightful)

    by dohzer ( 867770 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @02:59AM (#60457656)

    A fool and investor's money are soon parted.

  • by sjames ( 1099 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @03:12AM (#60457674) Homepage Journal

    I sincerely hope these people get burned at the stake by a band of outraged fundamentalists.

    Don't we have enough creepy cults in this country? Somebody PLEASE tell me this was accidentally copied from The Onion.

    I will make up my own mind what to believe or not, and reserve the right not to be bombarded with a fake corporate religion in the workplace.

    • Re: (Score:2, Troll)

      by gtall ( 79522 )

      Ya, nothing like a band of outraged fundamentalists showing their enemies the Love of Jesus Christ by burning them at the stake. It would bring back the nostalgia of the good ol' days.

      • by sjames ( 1099 )

        OTOH, it would at least be expedient. We don't have time for the courts to do their somersaults trying to avoid ruling on the issue at hand. This kind of crap needs to be nipped in the bud before we have a bunch of would be god-emperors running around demanding worship because they have a pile of cash.

  • Those guys have a knack for showmanship, this is right up their alley as they have some of the coolest rituals around.
  • The proper response to any "divinity consultant", "fung-chung sooie consultant", and other psudeoscience bullshit is to waste as much of their time as possible, give them the runaround, and refuse to pay them after several hours on work on the grounds of "You didn't render a service" and then throw him out the building and tell everyone that he made multiple sectarian comments towards your Jewish, Islamic, and Hindu workers and denigrated their faith.

    Lies that, unlike his, will have a measurable impact on t

  • by drnb ( 2434720 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @04:06AM (#60457754)
    There is nothing wrong with corporate sacred rituals. For example at one corporation our sacred, inviolable, ritual was that QA only tested what they built from the software version control repository and only QA could ship a binary to a customer.
    • I once worked for a software house who were in deep trouble - mostly because of their focus on writing payroll software for ICL mainframes.

      They famously sacrificed a goat in the hope that the company would recover.

      Within weeks, they went bankrupt.

      Moral: Always apply QA to your spiritual guides.

  • Comment removed based on user account deletion
  • by DrXym ( 126579 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @04:47AM (#60457798)
    They're called scrum masters. They make incantations, perform rituals and other forms of wishful thinking in the belief that it will ensure a bountiful code harvest.
  • bullshit (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Tom ( 822 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @04:59AM (#60457824) Homepage Journal

    For one thing, "It's hard to exhort workers to give their professional activities transcendental meaning when, at the same time, those workers can be terminated."

    This. Work used to have a meaning, when it was either for yourself or something that you could sink your soul into because it was common to retire within the same company that you started and had your entire career in.

    Hire and fire ended that. Anyone who sinks his soul into a job today is a fool. You can find meaning in WHAT you do - but not who you do it for, because they don't feel much loyalty to you anymore. Whenever the management consults come in, some jobs will be cut, because somehow, they always manage to find improvements possible by eliminating people. (because that's the easy way out. Doing actual business process re-engineering is tough work and requires deep understanding of the processes, which an external consultant with a small time budget won't have nor get)

    I'm loyal to my company while they pay me and otherwise make my job interesting and attractive. But "spiritual meaning"? You'll create a bunch of rituals that a bunch of people will pay lip service to, but that's all.

    But hey, it's probably well paid and easy work. Maybe I should do that when I'm old and conservative and my brain is starting to degrade?

    • by imidan ( 559239 )

      For one thing, "It's hard to exhort workers to give their professional activities transcendental meaning when, at the same time, those workers can be terminated."

      This. Work used to have a meaning, when it was either for yourself or something that you could sink your soul into because it was common to retire within the same company that you started and had your entire career in.

      Hire and fire ended that. Anyone who sinks his soul into a job today is a fool. You can find meaning in WHAT you do - but not who you do it for, because they don't feel much loyalty to you anymore. Whenever the management consults come in, some jobs will be cut, because somehow, they always manage to find improvements possible by eliminating people. (because that's the easy way out. Doing actual business process re-engineering is tough work and requires deep understanding of the processes, which an external consultant with a small time budget won't have nor get)

      I'm loyal to my company while they pay me and otherwise make my job interesting and attractive. But "spiritual meaning"? You'll create a bunch of rituals that a bunch of people will pay lip service to, but that's all.

      But hey, it's probably well paid and easy work. Maybe I should do that when I'm old and conservative and my brain is starting to degrade?

      This is like a second-order bullshit job. One reason a lot of people are dissatisfied with their jobs is because they're bullshit jobs.

      https://www.strike.coop/bullshit-jobs/ [strike.coop]

      This month, I had to renew my IRS I9 form with my employer. This is a form that says that I have the legal right to work in the US. I am a native-born US citizen. I have always had, and always will have, the right to work in the US, unless the unlikely situation arises that I renounce my US citizenship for another country's. I haven't

    • Re: (Score:2, Insightful)

      by gtall ( 79522 )

      "Work used to have a meaning", like slavery? Or working for the monopolies of early 20th century? Or being not very white, not very middle class during the 50's-60's? The past always look better if you train yourself to ignore the painful parts.

    • by twosat ( 1414337 )

      In The Beginning Was The Plan: https://www.smart-jokes.org/pl... [smart-jokes.org]

  • How exactly is this "News for Nerds, Stuff that Matters"? I guess I am missing the point.

  • by nospam007 ( 722110 ) * on Monday August 31, 2020 @05:35AM (#60457878)

    I one wrote software for such a company, they had paid a couple of hundred bucks apiece for 'anti-virus-stickers' with the Virgin Mary glued to the exterior of every desktop computer to protect them against malware.

    I obviously billed them double and they paid without any remarks whatsoever.

    Even more obviously, a year after that, they went bankrupt.

  • by codeButcher ( 223668 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @06:12AM (#60457970)
    I sure wish that corporations would get back to being places of employment for the agreed 40 hours a week (only) and allow us drones to go home and drink, support sport, worship, have fun, party, support charity, participate in politics and eat food and snacks OF OUR OWN CHOOSING - or not, if we so choose. Instead of forcing their makebelief on us and we pretending to be teambuilt by it. Wishful thinking, I know...
  • I can't believe people intelligent enough to run a business would fall for this bullshit.
    • Re:Ripoff for losers (Score:4, Interesting)

      by SuricouRaven ( 1897204 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @07:14AM (#60458120)

      It makes sense, in a horrible way. If you are a high-ranked manager at a business, you want to promote employee loyalty - because while they may be replaceable and expendable drones, they work harder if they don't see themselves that way. You can try to send them on team-building exercises, or arrange company events - but then, who are the real masters of instilling community and loyalty? Churches. That industry has a great track record of instilling an absolute loyalty. Church members are so loyal, they'll not only work for free, they'll give up part of their income to the church. So whatever they are doing, it must be worth investigating to see if it can be used in the corporate world.

      • Fascism == Corporatism. Never imagined they'd go this far... Oh, and if you believe the "invisible hand of the market" is going to super naturally bring about a better world then you've got yourself another religious belief; by definition.

    • It doesn't take intelligence to run a business, it takes leadership.
  • (gonna try this again, because the first one might not have gone through)

    Insofar as I may be heard by anything, which may or may not care what I say, I ask, if it matters, that you be forgiven for anything you may have done or failed to do which requires forgiveness. Conversely, if not forgiveness but something else may be required to ensure any possible benefit for which you may be eligible after the destruction of your body, I ask that this, whatever it may be, be granted or withheld, as the case may be,

  • by OneHundredAndTen ( 1523865 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @07:43AM (#60458212)
    So we know what morons spend their money in such nonsense, and so we can avoid buying their products.
  • Well it's official, we've crossed into the loony and comedic part of the cyberpunk spectrum now (where you might find such works as Judge Dredd, Transmetropolitan, perhaps Demolition Man...)

  • Idiocracy is going to turn out to be the best/worst prediction ever made.

  • That's all we need, the rise of corporate cults. If you thought your management was tyrannical before, wait until they become your clergy and business rules and culture become promoted as "faith" - the violation of which doesn't just result in your excommunication (firing) but also a separation of your spirituality and the loss of your faith. This may seem to be an extreme view, but mark my words, people will start blending company ritual into personal religion. The trauma suffered by those who leave cults

  • The bigger problem comes when workers feel that any sort of advantage (including simple trust and credibility) might be given by management to others who share their own religious ideals.

    In a private company, particularly a smaller one, this is less of an issue but in a publicly traded company or one large enough to have a significant employment monopoly or economic momentum this becomes a serious problem that can't be allowed.

  • by EndlessNameless ( 673105 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @09:25AM (#60458522)

    Actual religious people should be offended at the idea of having their sincere beliefs molded into corporate propaganda and perverted in the pursuit of profit.

    Atheists and non-religious people would be upset by the inclusion of irrelevant nonsense in their lives... and yet another corporate attempt to provoke cultish motivation from their employees.

    The only people who benefit from this are upper management and the major shareholders. This is dirty no matter how you look at it. This is one of the most morally and philosophically degenerate things I've ever heard of.

    And I was already convinced 2020 is a trainwreck.

  • by tiqui ( 1024021 ) on Monday August 31, 2020 @03:19PM (#60459770)

    We've gone from big institutions pushing "social justice", "environmental justice", etc instead of actual JUSTICE (the sort that requires no modifying word because it's the real thing), to phony corporate and celebrity virtue signalling (where if they did not advertise how virtuous they were, we'd surely not be able to figure it out by simply observing their actions), to phony religiosity...

    ...and some people keep telling me "things cannot possibly get any worse...

    This reeks of people with pointless MBA degrees who have run out of buzzwords and exhausted the supply of consultant firms with bright ideas for increasing productivity that can be put into a PowerPoint and shown to a new batch of sucker investors.

    That these businesses are publicly admitting they want religiosity but are not interested in bringing in actual religion to get it should be a big neon sign to everybody within miles that the management is foolish. Whether religion in the workplace is a good idea or not is a different conversation, and takes you down the rabbit hole of whether they are all the same (they CANNOT be, since they disagree on so much) and whether any should be preferred or disfavored (nobody in HR wants to be the one to die for the crime of pointing out the features/bugs in one that might favor murder), how many hours of productive work time and square feet of facility space will be used, etc. No, the point of this particular stupid exercise is that it's planned from the outset to be empty meaningless nothingness - sorta like those "team building" fads of years gone by where companies took groups of employees out into the woods or zip-lining or fire-walking, etc. In other words: stupid managers with no real plans trying to impress their superiors.

Top Ten Things Overheard At The ANSI C Draft Committee Meetings: (7) Well, it's an excellent idea, but it would make the compilers too hard to write.

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