Ballistic Clipboard Holds Papers, Stops Bullets 161
Zothecula writes "Although police officers in most countries are issued bulletproof vests, they don't necessarily wear them at all times — would you want to heave one of those things around for an entire shift? What they do often carry, however, are clipboards. Taking the "every little bit helps" approach, Ohio's IMPACT Armor Technologies has put two and two together, and come up with something that should actually offer some protection — a Ballistic Clipboard."
Ok, so it holds paper ... (Score:5, Funny)
And it stops bullets, which means it can probably stop rock too.
But what about scissors?
Re:Ok, so it holds paper ... (Score:5, Funny)
TFA says it's effective against knives, scissors are a pair of knives together, so yes. No mention of lizards or Spock though...
Re:Ok, so it holds paper ... (Score:4, Funny)
I got the impression that was stabby knives. Scissors are slicy knives, and it might make a crucial difference.
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Wait a minute... it's a clipboard (i.e, stiff enough to write on), and bulletproof, but you think your scissors will shear it? Comparison to a thin sheet of tyvek or kevlar probably means they're only at risk to a really big set of shears (not scissors) with massive force. Meanwhile, stabby weapons do pose a piercing risk to kevlar.
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What about steely knives? Or is it that they just can't kill the beast?
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Well, the last thing I remember, I was running for the door.
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Roshambo is serious business.
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock-paper-scissors [wikipedia.org]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rochambeau_(disambiguation) [wikipedia.org]
Please go correct wikipedia instead of me.
Thanks.
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Meh, the Combinatorics don't work for a 6-player battle. Each person has 5 ways to win or lose, and there's no uniform distribution for the 25 possible non-identity (rock-vs-rock) states. Someone has to have 3 winning combinations or more, someone else gets stuck with at best 2.
We either have to have a 7th participant (or at least an odd one), or Spock Must Die* (sorry, couldn't resist the TOS reference) to get us back to 5, which had that elegant pentagram diagram that gave each participant 2 wins and 2
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If they make a round one with razor edges, they could have the Oddjob Ballistic Clipboard!
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And it stops bullets, which means it can probably stop rock too.
But what about scissors?
In Soviet Russia Clipboard stops YOU!
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I joke that my Model M keyboard can stop a bullet. Haven't tried it yet, though :-).
Re:Ok, so it holds paper ... (Score:5, Funny)
Knowing people's fanatical devotion to their model M keyboards, I think they'd rather take the bullet than let the keyboard do it :-p
Re:Ok, so it holds paper ... (Score:4, Funny)
The real question is: If a bullet hits a Model M, would it make more noise than someone typing on it?
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It wouldn't matter since people, like my female co-workers, would complain. :( See http://aqfl.net/node/5825 [aqfl.net] for the details and a poll.
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In a life-or-death situation, I'd probably let the keyboard take the bullet, but only because I still have a stockpile of 7 more.
It would be a different story if I were down to my last, say, 5...
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In a life-or-death situation, I'd probably let the keyboard take the bullet, but only because I still have a stockpile of 7 more.
What was your address again?
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Yes. But you have to edit xorg.conf, and we all know what that means.
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It means I'd have to create xorg.conf first. ;)
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Yes. But you have to edit xorg.conf, and we all know what that means.
That your day is ruined and the next week is going to suck? [xkcd.com]
Simpsons did it. (Score:2)
http://www.thinkgeek.com/homeoffice/supplies/e769/?srp=1 [thinkgeek.com]
Even if Thinkgeek wasn't already selling a similar product, how is this news?
Re:Simpsons did it. (Score:4, Informative)
it's also 2/3 the weight with a higher rating. i'ts also 3 times the price..
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Vibranium (Score:2)
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Wonder if Captain America ever used his shield as clipboard (i think he actually did in the movie), if so we have prior art if they try to patent this.
I remember Politeness Man wielding similar devices, perhaps this would be the perfect device for Bureaucrat Man or Safety Inspector Man or any of dozens of new super heroes - the comic book biz really needs them, they've been beating to death the heroes they've got.
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The way you're doing it, a company that invents a warp-drive wouldn't be able to patent it because Star Trek thought of it!
Can you say... (Score:2)
Slashvertisement?
I knew you could! This one isn't even interesting.
Re:Can you say... (Score:4, Insightful)
It's worse, IMO: a blog copied from a blog copied from a blog copied from a press release. The web is turning into nothing but content farms.
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I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Everybody knows you never go full retard.
Census-takers nationwide breathe a sigh of relief (Score:1)
Bringing the census to rough neighborhoods just got a little safer.
old news (Score:2)
been done before, using recycle body armour plates. Can't be exported to other geek filled countries, IIRC.
ThinkGeek (Score:1)
Interesting.. (Score:2)
This is the second article I've seen recently about a product that has been on Thinkgeek.com for a while. First the caffeinated jerky and now this. The one on Thinkgeek seems to be different but the concept is the same, holds papers and stops bullets. It seems the Thinkgeek one doesn't stop .357 and .44 mag though.
How it'll work. (Score:2)
1) Law enforcement sees product, laughs at the idea.
2) Manufacturer lobbies Congress to pass bill with massive federal grant for their new toy
3) Law enforcement brass around the country buy these with federal funds
4) Law enforcement rank-and-file take them home and give them to their kids
5) Repeat
Copyright violation? (Score:2)
Unless Zothecula=Ben Coxworth (which one never knows nowadays) this looks very much like a copyright violation. It is a 1:1 copy of the first paragraph of the referenced article from Ben. And Ben at least took some effort to reformulate when he took it from http://www.ohgizmo.com/2011/11/08/this-clipboard-could-save-your-life/ [ohgizmo.com].
But then, does crowdvertisement care about copyright?
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It can be argued as fair use. Considering it's a news article, that only an excerpt was copied and that there's a link to the original work, and that damages to the original author seem hard to justify, it's not clear whether it's a copyright violation or not.
Proof Again (Score:4, Interesting)
Once more proof that there is a real solution to every imaginary problem.
As we have watched violent crime rates plummet, it makes perfect sense to be thinking about how to protect the ever increasing number of police on the streets, from all of the violent crime that would have endangered them 25 years ago when violent crime was a really serious issue, and the crack wars had bullets flying in the cities.
Yes, yet another brilliant solution to a totally nonexistent problem. Now that we have a police force that primarily goes around directing traffic on details, pulling people over for the most minor infractions of the letter of the driving rules, and spending copious amounts of time sitting by the side of the road gabbing on their cell phones, or texting (the most common activities that I see cops working diligently at), its clear that we need such devices to protect them from the nearly infinite numbers of bullets which are not flying towards them.
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Not just that, even pot. Once they legalize pot (which, has seen such a demographic shift that I think its likely to be a problem for them big time) well... pot users make up a group more than twice as large as the next 3 major illicit drugs combined. The war on drugs really is a war on pot users more so than anything else.
Once that ends, and more than half of the "problem" is now legalized.... well.... thats an aweful lot of prison gaurds, cops, judges (federal and state), etc who all.... will have little
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How many of those 160 killed last year were shot through a clipboard?
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Ok, however, I said overall violent crime:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Violent_Crime_Rates_in_the_United_States.svg [wikipedia.org]
So.... as we can see...pretty nice drop since the early 90s, almost 20 years now.
I am pretty unimpressed by the articles overall treatment of possible reasons, since, I would think that such a long term drop in crime would tend to indicate that sucha spike in one area must have some sort of underlying cause. They mention, for example, the increase in police deaths due to auto accidents an
I've worked in offices... (Score:4, Funny)
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Are you offering to paint goatse on it or something?
You say office... (Score:2)
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-Your boss
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So.... (Score:5, Insightful)
If someone takes a shot at you, how likely is it that you'll be able to hold on to that clipboard in a position where it actually protects something? Better than just dropping the clipboard and running/diving for the nearest cover, exit or whatnot. The only way I can see you manage to keep this in a reasonable position is if you're standing still, in which case you'll look like Adam with the fig leaf because it's hardly a riot shield. What's next, a bullet proof donut box?
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I know a few current and former law enforcement officers. One of them talked about how a driver said to him that if he had a gun that he'd be dead by now walking up to the car like he did. He just smiled and agreed. What the driver did not know is that while his right hand was in his pocket he was holding on to a .38 special hammerless revolver. The uniform trousers at the time had a holster for the revolver sewn into the pocket. He did not even have to draw the gun but just point and shoot through the
Waste of money since... (Score:2)
not even Cat like reflex's will help you since most handgun murders are within 5 meters. So with a 9mm traveling at 335mps you have about 2msec to get the clipboard into the bullet path and here is a hint, no ones limbs can move that fast. This wont help you against a pro since they will simply pop you in the melon from behind and you will never even know it happened. But hey if it makes you sleep better at night.
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So with a 9mm traveling at 335mps you have about 2msec to get the clipboard into the bullet path and here is a hint, no ones limbs can move that fast.
What about Neo? I sure wish they would have made more than one Matrix movie...
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not even Cat like reflex's will help you since most handgun murders are within 5 meters. So with a 9mm traveling at 335mps you have about 2msec to get the clipboard into the bullet path and here is a hint, no ones limbs can move that fast. This wont help you against a pro since they will simply pop you in the melon from behind and you will never even know it happened. But hey if it makes you sleep better at night.
True, but you figure when you're reading from a clipboard you're holding it around your center mass... which is where (A) most people aim for and (B) statistically the place you'd get shot since that's where so much of your mass is anyway.
So if you're a cop on a call standing outside his/her squad-car reading a warrant, and some wacko decides to take a pot-shot at you from his house, there's at least a *chance* it will be in the way already..
I'm not saying a great chance, and if you're serving a warrant you
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I'm pretty sure they're relying on chance, and having the clipboard already covering the area an amateur is likely to shoot at.
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I think it's more aimed at something that's naturally between you and the shooter. No ballistic armor is going to keep them safe from a trained shooter with the correct weapon for the job in the correct location. They only rate it up to shotguns no rifles or big hand guns. That desert eagle that gang bangers are so fond of is going through. As to the 2ms that's from when it's leaving the barrel it takes a good deal of time to aim and fire suspect the intention is to get this between you and the weapon i
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Which of these scenarios seems more likely to you: cop holding a clipboard gets shot in the back of the head by a pro, or cop holding a clipboard gets shot by a dirtbag in a vehicle during a routine traffic stop? In the likely case, the copy doesn't have to move the clipboard at all, it will already be between his chest and the shooter, greatly cutting down the available target area. And since the guy in the car is going to be moving very quickly, he is not going to be able to take the time to consider
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I'm more worried about him capitalizing the C in "Cat like".
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not even Cat like reflex's will help you since most handgun murders are within 5 meters. So with a 9mm traveling at 335mps you have about 2msec to get the clipboard into the bullet path and here is a hint, no ones limbs can move that fast.
You're ignoring the perp's reflexes. You don't go from 0 to trigger pulled in an instant. In the time it takes the bad guy to get his gun aimed in your direction and pull the trigger you could very well have interposed the clipboard between you and the business end of the barrel. His reflexes are no better (or worse) than yours.
Plan A is still "get the hell out of the way" but some protection is better than near certain death.
solutions for bad habits (Score:2)
I'll get blasted for this but I hate when people suggest solutions for problems which are procedural.
" I don't like wearing my vest because it's not comfortable"
Knee Jerk Solution: let's make a bullet proof clipboard.
Proper Solution: Get used to it, wear it for those who love you, until we come up with a better one.
I here this same argument with motorcycle protective gear,
"My jacket gets too hot"
Knee Jerk: Lets design elbow and knee pads for motorcyclists.
I was thinking about motorcycle gear too (Score:2)
I agree with you. Each time I think about riding without my full leather pants, I ask myself, "Is today the day I want to get road rash?"
Yes, it's hot during the summer. Yes, it means an extra few minutes removing pants, boots, etc. when I arrive at my destination. On the other hand, I get the feeling that should I ever spill, the extra time will have been well spent.
I understand that putting on an uncomfortable, heavy, and hot vest day after day is probably terribly inconvenient. On the other hand, so is g
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At least there's the option of perforated leather to get some air flow, or vented textiles w/armour if you'd rather go that route. Luckily there's tons of different gear for us two wheelers.
multishot? (Score:2)
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Don't worry. The gunman's wrists will also be broken by the first shot of the hand cannon, so you don't need to worry about the other 8 rounds.
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And, if you are holding your clipboard at an approximate 45 degree angle while writing a ticket when someone suddenly pulls a gun on you and shoots, it will probably deflect the bullet down in a perfect angle to blow off your privates. Either way, a really bad day.
Old News (Score:2)
Habit and reflexes (Score:2)
If they get into the habit of bringing the clipboard up to the car they just pulled over, a natural reflex when confronted with a gun would likely be to shield themselves with whatever's in their hand -- the clipboard. So why not make it bulletproof?
I can see this saving a few lives. Why not, unless there are other avenues where the money could save even more lives?
On the other hand, did they test this against a standard backstop, or in a usage situation? If an officer is holding it at writing length and it
Some leaked memos (Score:3)
Possible next-gen products depending on the success of the clipboard in the market:
1. Stickers for the clipboard: the word SHOOT on a green background, DON'T SHOOT on red, or the alternative white diagonal slash on top of the word SHOOT, each to be stuck on the appropriate clipboards, of course.
2. Bullet shaped pens
3. Angry bulletproof clipboards
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S&W Tactical Pens
http://www.smith-wesson.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/Category1_750001_750051_757885_-1_757876_757837 [smith-wesson.com]
Re-inventing or merely gimikery and advertising??? (Score:2)
Bulletproof clipboards have been around since the 70s.
Most law enforcement agencies gave up on them as being of limited value.
Prior Art? (Score:2)
I'm pretty sure the Engineer units from Civilization II carried these. Can't think of any other way they could repel mechanized infantry units so effectively...
=Smidge=
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Hey, if spearmen can defeat modern armored fighting vehicles, surely an engineer can plant a few explosives and take out the mech infantry.
What about the second shot? (Score:2)
The first shot from a 44 magnum knocks it out of your hand, then whatcha gunna do, Punk?
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Is it really worth it? (Score:3)
Is this really worth it? It covers about 25% of the front torso (and 0% of the back) assuming it's held perfectly vertical and not tipped over horizontally for reading. So there's still a 75% chance of getting shot in the torso (or a 89% chance if you include the possibility of being shot in the back).
In comparison, a bullet proof vest gives nearly 100% coverage of the torso and back.
If a cop is worried enough about being shot that he wants to carry this shield, why doesn't he just wear a vest and get much better protection (yes, I know a vest is heavy and uncomfortable, but getting shot is uncomfortable too)? Or carry a much bigger shield [scifiscoop.com] (with a notepad mount on the back) to give better protection?
Sounds like it's just a way to get police departments to spend $150 on a clipboard instead of $4. I'm all for spending money to enhance safety, but this sounds like it's just going to provide a false sense of security and perhaps make it less likely that a cop will wear his vest since he has this clipboad.
Census (Score:2)
Appropriate for census workers. They have tons of paperwork, and often have to deal with unpleasant, suspicious, insane people.
Uhhh, yes? (Score:2)
Although police officers in most countries are issued bulletproof vests, they don't necessarily wear them at all times — would you want to heave one of those things around for an entire shift?
Unless you are retarded, yes you wear a bulletproof vest anytime it's mandated. There's a reason for it, and no you won't have a warning to put it on before it's ~*~REALLY~*~ needed. Anyone who isn't wearing it while required is putting themselves at risk and also the people who will put themselves in harms way to save them when they get hit.
I say this as a former Marine, and I can't think of a single time that I saw my squad members or even platoon members not wearing protective gear when required. If I
Ob. Family Guy (Score:2)
Mayor West: I should warn you, I have a tiny bullet proof shield the exact size of a bullet somewhere on my body, and if you hit it, I'll be unharmed, and your plan will be foiled. You'll be the laughing stock of me! ...
I just had to rewatch the episode (4ACX28, Season 4 Episode 25) to find that quote!
Tech been around long time (Score:2)
iPads armored up (Score:2)
Re:Momentum (Score:5, Insightful)
What's your point? Tiny piece of metal travelling through body shredding internal organs vs. large surface area of clipboard leaving some bruising. I know which one I'd prefer.
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The bullet?
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You might not want to use popular media such as television, movies or video games, for accurate representation of physics.
Getting shot with a handgun bullet won't cause you to flip head-over-heels, nor your head to explode [cad-comic.com].
Mass plays an important role here.
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However, Moments come into play too. With your wrist as the fulcrum, hitting the middle or far edge of the clipboard is still going to send it some distance back towards you. If it doesn't cause bruising to the impact site, it's probably going to sprain your wrist.
all preferable to a bullet in the gullet.
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Re:Momentum (Score:5, Insightful)
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Re:Momentum (Score:5, Insightful)
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This is a ridiculous idea anyway. Folks killed wearing body armor are often struck at an angle where the armor does not offer protection - along the sides and/or the armpit area. Do you really anticipate a cop that decides not to wear body armor that day will walk around with a few clipboards positioned appropriately around their body to offer protection?
Clever marketing gim
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Getting shot while wearing a bullet proof vest HURTS A LOT!!!
All the vest does is stop the bullet from penetrating, it does not absorb much of the energy. Getting shot by a pistol while wearing a bullet proof vest will knock you on your ass and you will be in pain. Getting shot in your clipboard, painless.
This would be the bullet proof vests that a standard cop would wear, not the hard plate ones like the military uses.
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The "knock you on your ass" phenomena is a TV/movie taught thing that has actually come to pass in many cases because people learned that is what is supposed to happen. It will not feel good, but it will not knock you down. As far as the pain/knockdown goes, it is probably more with body armor than without. A full me
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The miltary ones appear to be similar to civilian bulletproof material only with extra metal plates on the outside and extra polycarbon
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Not at all.
Police don't use clipboards for anything anymore. Because most of them in the western world have moved to terminals of some kind, with very few exceptions where the dinosaurs are hanging on at the top trying to stop things from going forward.
As for the comment about cops not wearing bullet proof vests all the time? They wear them all the time, at least in Canada. They have to, it's required under the officer code of conduct. And yes, they're heavy, and bulky, and they weigh you down. But it'
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you're right. They should make AFIS terminals bulletproof...
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Might be a good idea, except in some cases where they're bolted into the cars, and all you take is a hand terminal that's linked to it.