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Microsoft's "Source Fource" Action Figures

Posted by CmdrTaco on Wednesday February 20, @10:03AM
from the is-frequent-rebooting-a-power dept.

RCanine writes "Microsoft is attempting to curry mind share with the 3-12 age bracket with their new event, the Source Fource, a series of developer-based action figures. Windows Vista Sensei, SQL Server Gal and some lame gender stereotypes presumably seek to rid the world of bearded, katana-wielding evil-doers. From the article: 'Between March 15th and April 15th 2007, the new super dudette will be offered and will be sent to developers who get their act together and attend at least two live MSDN Webcasts or two MSDN Virtual Labs, or one of each.'" I just can't figure out what to make of this, except that I hope someone can tell me if it blends. Or melts. Or burns.

[+] humor, microsoft, sourcefarce, oldnews, !sourceforge (tagging beta)

For the love of... (Score:5, Funny)

by x3rc3s (954149) on Wednesday February 20, @10:06AM (#22488024)

This is a sure sign of the apocalypse...

[ Reply to This ]
- I think I speak for everyone here... (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by DragonHawk (21256) on Wednesday February 20, @10:46AM (#22488650) Homepage Journal
  
  I think I speak for everyone here when I say: Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. Over.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 20, @10:06AM (#22488026)

SQL Server Gal is hot! Is she single?!

[ Reply to This ]
- Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by Lemmy Caution (8378) on Wednesday February 20, @10:23AM (#22488308) Homepage
  
  I am not going to make an SQL Injection joke. No. I am not.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
  - Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
    
    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 20, @10:42AM (#22488604)
    
    I will then.
    
    I would inject her then 9 months later watch her drop her tables. If you know what I mean.
    
    [ Reply to This | Parent ]
- Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by ultranova (717540) on Wednesday February 20, @10:35AM (#22488492)
  
  SQL Server Gal is hot! Is she single?!
  
  No, but she isn't big on limiting access - hell, that's the name of her little sister. However, as a result she has worms, bugs, and viruses. Use virus protection if you want to mess with her, and remember: she charges for the "fun", unless you meet her at a shady BitTorrent server somewhere.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
- - Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
    
    by xSauronx (608805) <xsauronxdamnit@gmai[ ]om ['l.c' in gap]> on Wednesday February 20, @10:24AM (#22488322)
    
    If you don't want to say "hell" you can substitute "Detroit"
    
    [ Reply to This | Parent ]
    - Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
      
      by egomaniac (105476) on Wednesday February 20, @10:31AM (#22488422) Homepage
      
      If you don't want to say "hell" you can substitute "Detroit"
      
      Hey hey hey, there are kids reading this. You know you can't say words like "Detroit" in polite company! Now go wash your mouth out with soap, young man!
      
      [ Reply to This | Parent ]
      - Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
        
        by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 20, @10:33AM (#22488454)
        
        Belgium, man. Belgium.
        
        [ Reply to This | Parent ]
Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 20, @10:07AM (#22488036)

They MUST start making some "evil villian" models too. One that looks like RMS. I'll buy a dozen!

[ Reply to This ]
- Re:Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by esocid (946821) on Wednesday February 20, @10:12AM (#22488128)
  
  They do. I think I saw a penguin on there.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

by jrothwell97 (968062) <jonathanNO@SPAMjonathan-rothwell.co.uk> on Wednesday February 20, @10:09AM (#22488064) Homepage Journal

Let me guess.

Are the nemeses of these characters 'Evil Dr Torvalds' and 'The Jobs Bandit', who are intent on overtaking the world with their clone armies of penguins, platypuses and scary Finder icons?

[ Reply to This ]
- Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by Hoi Polloi (522990) on Wednesday February 20, @10:23AM (#22488302)
  
  Batman has been fighting Linux for years. [wikipedia.org]
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
- Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by Viceroy Potatohead (954845) on Wednesday February 20, @10:28AM (#22488378) Homepage
  
  Don't forget Professor Oppensource, with his evil creations! Give him a monocle and a Nazi armband, with the Firefox logo instead of a swastika. Lesser villains such as Dr. Oppenoffis could be thwarted by the team's pet Oox,Mel. If MS is going to implement the gayest idea ever, they might as well go all the way.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
WTF? (Score:5, Insightful)

by joaommp (685612) on Wednesday February 20, @10:09AM (#22488066)

<irony>I work at Microsoft. How come I knew this first from /.?</irony>

Let the "you must be new here" comments begin.

[ Reply to This ]
Too much cash in MS marketing. (Score:5, Interesting)

by AceJohnny (253840) <jlargentayeNO@SPAMgmail.com> on Wednesday February 20, @10:09AM (#22488072) Journal

Microsoft is the living proof that Marketing > Quality (as if anybody doubted that). They know that their marketing dept is their most important asset, and they can afford to pour cash at them. Hence their marketing people can afford to try out any wacky ideas and see what sticks.

That's the only explanation I can come up for this initiative. Anything else makes me want to obliterate humanity.

[ Reply to This ]
Microsoft At Its Finest (Score:5, Funny)

by eldavojohn (898314) * <my/.username@@@gmail.com> on Wednesday February 20, @10:10AM (#22488092) Homepage Journal

The best part is when you click "Watch Them in Action!" [microsoft.com] and it takes you to a page.

Now, a lot of sites have this crazy idea of embedded video that streams from a site or source that's dedicated to streaming video. You know like YouTube, Blip.tv or any of the .tv sites really. Does Microsoft utilize any of those freely available options? Oh no, of course not! YouTube is Google! Even if we don't have a competing solution we must not use theirs!

So what happens when you click "view"? Well, it creates a popup window that opens up Windows Media Player! Good luck viewing a .asx file all you non-Windows users.

The least Microsoft could do is create their own streaming video server but, alas, we must revert to our archaic mentality, reject all that is sensible and invade my privacy and comfort zone by automatically opening a program that is tied to the kernel (and at least historically had admin rights when I didn't) sitting in kernel land on my computer.

Assistant: Mr. Ballmer! Research indicates that Richard Stallman is 50% more cuddly than you!
Ballmer: Damnit ... must be his hair. Well, we'll see about that! Put the action figures I've hand crafted here immediately into production! Release plush dolls of clippy! Find me puppies to carry around with me at press conferences and when their cute factor falls below 40%, have them killed and replaced!

[ Reply to This ]
- Re:Microsoft At Its Finest (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by mhall119 (1035984) on Wednesday February 20, @10:34AM (#22488468) Homepage Journal
  
  So what happens when you click "view"? Well, it creates a popup window that opens up Windows Media Player! Good luck viewing a .asx file all you non-Windows users.
  Hmmm, if GIF is pronouned "jiff", and JPG is pronounced "jay-peg", wouldn't that make ASX....oh....oh my......suddenly it all makes sense.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
they should have just adopted the os-tans (Score:5, Insightful)

by Akatosh (80189) on Wednesday February 20, @10:11AM (#22488114) Homepage

This has been done and done well [wikipedia.org]. Why the cheap knockoff?

[ Reply to This ]
It's at times like this ... (Score:5, Insightful)

by Stavr0 (35032) on Wednesday February 20, @10:16AM (#22488196) Homepage Journal

that I regret there's no photoshop contests on Slashdot.

[ Reply to This ]
DC will sue? (Score:5, Insightful)

by giminy (94188) on Wednesday February 20, @10:34AM (#22488478) Homepage Journal

Visual Studio Guy [microsoft.com] is the Green Lantern, MSDN Webcast Guy [microsoft.com] is Superman, Virtual Labs Guy [microsoft.com] is The Flash. I don't see credit on there anywhere, and this is definitely a marketing thing (not a parody).

I think MSDN Webcast Guy's tagline says it best, "His parents weren't very creative."

[ Reply to This ]
embrace, extend, extinguish - on names (Score:5, Interesting)

by Tom (822) on Wednesday February 20, @10:35AM (#22488484) Homepage Journal

I don't think it's coincidence that it sounds a lot like SourceForge [sourceforge.net].

I don't know why, but if I wanted to muddle a name, that's something I'd do: Create something that sounds much like it, is a bit childish and ridiculous, and try to make it popular.

[ Reply to This ]
Thanks (Score:5, Funny)

by lelitsch (31136) on Wednesday February 20, @10:35AM (#22488500)

Thank you Microsoft, for setting your people back 1000 years.

[ Reply to This ]
- Re:missing someone here.... (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by TripMaster Monkey (862126) on Wednesday February 20, @10:22AM (#22488286)
  
  Super-Sweaty Ballmer! Now with Mega-Chair-Throwing action (TM)! Pull the string and hear Super-Sweaty Ballmer say one of the following action phrases:
  
  - "Developers! Developers! Developers!"
  
  - "Woooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!"
  
  - "I'm going to f**king KILL Google!"
  
  Supplies are limited, so place your order now!
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]
- Re:Haha, the description is ACCURATE! (Score:5, Funny)
  
  by esocid (946821) on Wednesday February 20, @10:37AM (#22488526)
  
  10th degree black belt and martial arts master trained in the ancient art of combat, security and connectivity.
  Unless he can't find the drivers needed to use his weapons, then he's SOL.
  
  [ Reply to This | Parent ]

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For the love of... (Score:5, Funny)

I think I speak for everyone here... (Score:5, Funny)

Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! (Score:5, Funny)

Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

WTF? (Score:5, Insightful)

Too much cash in MS marketing. (Score:5, Interesting)

Microsoft At Its Finest (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Microsoft At Its Finest (Score:5, Funny)

they should have just adopted the os-tans (Score:5, Insightful)

It's at times like this ... (Score:5, Insightful)

DC will sue? (Score:5, Insightful)

embrace, extend, extinguish - on names (Score:5, Interesting)

Thanks (Score:5, Funny)

Re:missing someone here.... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Haha, the description is ACCURATE! (Score:5, Funny)

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For the love of... (Score:5, Funny)

I think I speak for everyone here... (Score:5, Funny)

Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Oooo, Ooooo, Oooo!!!!!! (Score:5, Funny)

Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)

WTF? (Score:5, Insightful)

Too much cash in MS marketing. (Score:5, Interesting)

Microsoft At Its Finest (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Microsoft At Its Finest (Score:5, Funny)

they should have just adopted the os-tans (Score:5, Insightful)

It's at times like this ... (Score:5, Insightful)

DC will sue? (Score:5, Insightful)

embrace, extend, extinguish - on names (Score:5, Interesting)

Thanks (Score:5, Funny)

Re:missing someone here.... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Haha, the description is ACCURATE! (Score:5, Funny)

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