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Journal Journal: Who looks down on whom 16

Find out where you fit in the grand scheme of geekdom with the Geek Hierarchy chart.

Pagans may also want to find out where they fit in the grand scheme of paganism with the Pagan Hierarchy Chart. [Disclaimer: If you don't know a Thelemite from a Wiccan, you probably won't get it. ;)] Pagans should start with the *second* link because it refers to the first one, although I suppose you could start with either one.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Interesting new virus? 15

Has anyone seen the following e-mail?

MS Client

this is the latest version of security update, the "September 2003, Cumulative Patch" update which eliminates all known security vulnerabilities affecting MS Internet Explorer, MS Outlook and MS Outlook Express as well as three new vulnerabilities. Install now to protect your computer from these vulnerabilities, the most serious of which could allow an malicious user to run executable on your system. This update includes the functionality of all previously released patches.

  System requirements Windows 95/98/Me/2000/NT/XP
  This update applies to MS Internet Explorer, version 4.01 and later
MS Outlook, version 8.00 and later
MS Outlook Express, version 4.01 and later
  Recommendation Customers should install the patch at the earliest opportunity.
  How to install Run attached file. Choose Yes on displayed dialog box.
  How to use You don't need to do anything after installing this item.

Microsoft Product Support Services and Knowledge Base articles can be found on the Microsoft Technical Support web site. For security-related information about Microsoft products, please visit the Microsoft Security Advisor web site, or Contact Us.

Thank you for using Microsoft products.

Please do not reply to this message. It was sent from an unmonitored e-mail address and we are unable to respond to any replies.

The names of the actual companies and products mentioned herein are the trademarks of their respective owners.

Obviously it's a fake. It had an executable attached to it that was supposed to be a 'fix'. I had a user e-mail and ask me if it was for real, though.

Now, the e-mail itself looks somewhat real, aside from the fact that the greeting says 'MS Client:', along with the obvious grammatical errors. They grabbed some images from the Microsoft Web site, but I can't reproduce them here in this JE, obviously. Let's just say the formatting looks like it *could* be real. If we didn't already know that Microsoft never publishes patches via e-mail, that is. ;)

Anyone else see this? I wonder how effective it is on the unwashed masses?

User Journal

Journal Journal: Demonstration of /. Moderation Abuse (PAY ATTENTION, JAMIE!) 15

Here is a first-hand demonstration of moderation abuse on Slashdot.

I said something *completely* unpopular. Look at how it got modded. The first point was *insightful* but after that, I got modded down *3* times as "overrated" because some people didn't agree with my viewpoint. They gave me the overrated mod because now they won't be subject to metamod. They didn't mod it troll or flamebait because they knew that it wasn't and that they'd get lambasted in metamod.

Just thought I'd point that out in case y'all thought I was crazy in my earlier JEs about my biggest /. pet peeve -- moderation abuse.

User Journal

Journal Journal: This Week's Enterprise - Anomaly (SPOILERS!!!) 13

Warning: SPOILERS! If you haven't watched Enterprise GO NO FURTHER.

Synopsis from
The mission to find the Xindi takes a treacherous turn when Enterprise is crippled by inexplicable, destructive spatial anomalies that distort the laws of physics. With systems down, Osaarian pirates board the ship and and raid it of valuable supplies. The crew captures one of the marauders, and Archer's sense of morality is tested when he interrogates the prisoner.

Pirates! Just in time for National Talk Like A Pirate Day!!! Minipoll: Do you think they planned that?
A) Of course they did. They're geeks too.
B) Pfft. Just a coincidence.

Archer really shows his darker side in this episode. He uses some rather coersive and brutal tactics with the Osaarian prisoner, including locking him in the air lock, and pointing a phaser to his head.

Obviously, Archer is desparate to know about the Xindi.

Why do you suppose the writers have taken this twist? Why is Archer so desparate?

And more importantly, what do you think of T'Pol's new hot new red uniform? ;-)


User Journal

Journal Journal: Arrrr! Shiver me timbers, baby! 24

For I am the infamous Dread Pirate Kidd!

ph34r m3 dr34d m4d sk1llz!

Err....ARRRRR... something like that...

Uhhh...take the test.

Post your results here instead of Bethanie or FortKnox's journal 'cause you like me better. I know you do. ;)

User Journal

Journal Journal: Weekly Recap(tm): Little bit o' Sol (and everyone else, too) 17

Weekly Recap(tm): Because enquiring geeks wanna know!

SolemnDragon has a number of things she'd like to get off her chest. Including no less than 4 kitchen fires. She seem to always be setting stuff on fire, because i'm sure we covered this last week. Oh well. As Jim Morrison once said, "Baby, you can light my fire."

Em Emalb was recently hit in the head with a brick by SolemnDragon, after posting dirty things in magnets on Bethanie's refrigerator. Wondering why Bethanie had Sol hit him in the head, Em wants to know if you do this, too. Just don't answer A, though, because if you do there's no telling who might hit you in the head with a brick.

Speaking of bethanie, sometime prior to her romps with Surak and many others on Slashdot ("No, not HBI -- that's Tuesday night. gmhowell is Monday, Surak is Wednesday & Friday, Dave is Thursday, and Saturday is Take All Comers night [literally!!!]. Get it straight!"), she apparently had romps with "other women". Sources close to Weekly Recap(tm) have suggested that at least one of the other women involved may have been either Some Woman or LadyGuardian but details are still sketchy at this time. (Next week: Bethanie kills Surak!). Meanwhile, Bethanie was apparently being mounted while she blows. Or something like that. DubiousDave was part of this caper, as bethanie claimed to be having fun with him while he was gagged. Weekly Recap(tm) has no idea who the other person involved was, and Surak has denied being involved in anyway. For once.

Abm0raz is hvanig a ltitle truolbe seplilng ltaely. But taht's oaky, bceuase apapretnly yuo wno't hvae any toruble raednig it. Teh smae srtoy wsa psoted on teh mian pgae. (ed. note: I always thought it was just me because I would frequently not notice such mispellings unless I was looking for them (i.e., proofreading, something I don't do with WR(tm) ;), but apparently this is how the brain actually works.)

Some Woman knows that you lied on your driver's license about your weight and height, Mr. Green Eyes. (We'll find out just who that is after the /. photo contest, I'm sure.) She also knows the the thermal conductivity of apple sauce. Just think about what she might "know" tomorrow.

gmhowell wants you to get Surak off his ass. Surak is just glad that gmhowell is not like bethanie.

Hey, CmdrTaco, Disclaimer: this Weekly Recap(tm) is for you, do not forward and a host of other legal obligations. Some people have disclaimers added to their work e-mail on the bottom automagically these days, jackass. Try learning something about the way Outlook and Lotus Notes are used in a corporate setting IRL.

zptdooda was thrown in jail recently for breaking the laws of physics. I cannae change the laws of physics, Jim! Surak also violated the laws of Weekly Recap(tm) by posting this. Please repost your JE, z, with comments enabled this time!

sebi just celebrated his 27th birthday. And I'm telling you to go be his friend now, in case you hadn't noticed Xerithane's plug.

On a serious note, go read Jack William Bell's 9/11 essay. No matter what your politics, you'll enjoy it. I guarantee it.

Somebody tell FortKnox that it's not National Talk Like a Pirate Day yet. Maybe he'll figure out why the RIAA is after him. Don't forget the FortKnox /. pr0n-o-matic, aka the FortKnox Memorial Slashdot Photo Contest. You still have this week to send in your pics.

LadyGuardian was looking for inspiration after a very long day, so she was found getting all steamy. Details are sketchy, but WR is sure this involves Bethanie. (Next week: Bethanie kills Surak. Twice!)

User Journal

Journal Journal: Weekly Recap(tm) is delayed and is currently in process... 27

But in the meantime, a poll:

Is netiquette dead?

Do you think, in light of the September That Never Ended[*], that netiquette is dead? I recently had an e-mail I sent to someone in private -- containing informatino of a private nature -- posted on a public forum without my permission. Call me an old fart, but in my day, you didn't do that. You asked permission before you forwarded such mails, and certainly before you posted them in a public forum.

This person may or may not know that that is improper netiquette, as they haven't been on the Net as long as some of us here. netiquette dead?

A) Yes. What kinda cave have you been living in?
B) No. Netiquette is just common sense.
C) I hope not. If you're in the cave, I'm in there with you!
D) I have NO IDEA what you just said.

[*] September that never ended: If you have no idea what I'm talking about look it up. No, it's NOT a 9/11 reference. But if you have to look that up, you're probably clueless anyway and should just answer D. ;)

Update: I'm extending the definition of the September that Never Ended to include e-mail and Internet forums at large, not just USENET.


Journal Journal: Weekly Recap(tm): Special End-of-Summer Swimsuit Edition! 15

Welcome to the Special End-of-Summer Swimsuit Edition of Weekly Recap(tm). Here you will find links to photos the most beautiful people from Slashdot and around the world wearing nothing but a thong!

PIC #1
PIC #2
PIC #3
PIC #4
PIC #5

Ha! I *tricked* you! Now that I've gotten your attention, go on and click a link above and if you haven't done so already, take the auracolors test mentioned in that JE. If you have taken the test, spread the link around your journals. I'm trying to get as many respondants as possible. So far there's only 16. And I thank all 16 of those people for taking the time to take the test in the name of hacker science! I'd like to get more repnsones, however. So please, before the JE gets archived, go out and take the auracolors test now and post your responses in that JE. Ok? Thanks. ;)


Journal Journal: EXPERIMENT: Incidence of indigos in hackerdom? 88

I was reading this little bit on Indigo Children and the hairs stood up on the back of my neck. I was like, dude, this is my story. As was the case when I read bio after bio of adult indigos. Many of their stories sounded way similar to mine.

So I noticed that they had a section on indigo adults. After reading this profile on an adult indigo, I was completely stunned. I fit this profile basically to a "T". But I was still (and am still) somewhat skeptical of this whole indigo thing. Although, OTOH, somehow I feel that I definitely am an indigo.

So I took the auracolors test at and was, I guess, not completely surprised that the my primary life color was indigo. In fact, I am, according to the test, a full 12-point indigo.

Now I noticed in the descriptions that many indigos are misdiagnosed as ADD or ADHD or Asperger's Syndrome (AS). This is also common in hackerdom. To quote esr from the Jargon File:

...hackers tend to believe they have good reason for skepticism about clinical explanations of the hacker personality. That being said, most would also concede that some hacker traits coincide with indicators for non-hyperactive ADD and AS ... It is probably true that boosters of both would find a rather higher rate of clinical ADD among hackers than the supposedly mainstream-normal 3-5% (AS is rarer at 0.4-0.5%).

Some of the indigo traits also seem to correspond to common hacker traits, IMHO, such as a strong dislike of broken systems (i.e., political, legal, health, etc.), a strong resistance to authority, fear of Big Brother, frustration with political systems such as voting, anger at rights being taken away, etc.

So a little experiment in the name of metaphysical science here: I'd like to see how many of you geeks (and even non-geeks ;) out there that read my journal rate on the auracolors test, and, as importantly, after reading the descriptions I laid out, do you feel that you are an indigo? If you, as I do, are a bit skeptical of the metagifted site, you might also wanna check out a some other sites on indigo children via this google search.

So here's what I'm looking for: what you are the results of your auracolors test, and do you feel from reading the descriptions that you might be (or your child might be) an indigo?


Journal Journal: Weekly Recap(tm): What the flaming stick of fsck? 32

Weekly Recap(tm): Because enquiring geeks wanna know!

For all those who I told and *ahem* forgot, it was Surak's birthday on Sunday. He's 31.

jawtheshark returned from his alien abdution this week. While jawtheshark was quoted as saying "that my absence was not accidental," mumbling something about it being his "2600 post," we all know that jawtheshark was abducted by the same aliens that took FortKnox and SlashChick around the same time.

Red Warriorwas busy talking about something mysteriously referred to only as FTW. Nobody knows WTF FTW means, but Weekly Recap(tm) suspects it stands for Frisking The Walrus. The Walrus is believed to be a codeword for GMontag, whom Red Warrior frisked while he slept.

Servo was busted for smoking marijuana in Alaska. Fortunately for Servo, personal marijuana possession is now legal in Alaska. However, Servo apparently also thinks that "2 megapixels is good enough for 8x10 prints". Lay off the weed, man.

gmhowell, Mr. Don't care, don't care, don't care was also abducted by space aliens, although for not very long apparently. But long enough to go to Mars, apparently. Or at least wonder why he went there.

Em Emalb shot and killed a retarded Rhesus monkey clone on Thursday. No one knows exactly why, but shortly afterward, he declared ownership of cyberspace. Fearing the fate of the monkey clone, no one was arguing at first. At least not until Em got "a catheter shoved up [his] pee-hole, then jabbed on through [his] spleen, then out [his] ass--sideways."

Speaking of Em's fate, this will happen to you unless you send in your pictures for the Slashdot Photo Contest 2 , hosted by FortKnox right now. I mean it!

SamTheButcher had almost nothing to talk about last week, and then on Sunday, apparently blurted it all out in one big butt-fucking animal assed chunk on Sunday. Does anyone know what the flaming stick of fuck he was talking about?

TechnoLust has been busy pimping himself out with hottub girl, the girl from church, a hot blonde waitress and GMontag. I always knew that TechnoLust was into those Christopher Walken types.

Saige has been all upset about life in our anti-Christian America, And she has embarked in a new career in vehiclular art. So that's what the tank is for.

Bethanie has been a little too quiet lately. Weekly Recap suspects she's up to something. Maybe involving old fogeys and parades...hmmm...

Daoine wants to see your ID. She promises that she has no ulterior motives.

SolemnDragon has decided to start a cooking show. First, she teaches us all about cast iron, now she's teaching us french fries and grease fires. Sources close to Weekly Recap(tm) and SolemnDragon have said that Sol's insurance company is cancelling her renter's policy. Especially after she nailed this nastygram to her neighbor's door. Sol may have to take up having loud, screaming sex at 3:00 a.m. just to get even. (BTW, Sol ... I apologize if I haven't gotten back to you on some e-mails we exchanged, but I've been busy working overtime. Things are slowing down this week at work, so ... expect those interview questions! ;)

LadyGuardian came out of the broom closet this week and announced that she's a witch. Well, okay, maybe she plays one on stage or something. (Sorry, I couldn't resist. ;)

Get your web hosting from, just 'cause Erica's cool.

User Journal

Journal Journal: diet pop + google + phenylalanine == Ultimate Web Spam? 17

One day while drinking my diet pop* (this was maybe about 3 or more years ago), I noticed the following wording on the bottle:


Being the curious sort of person I am, I typed phenylalanine into google and determined that phenylalanine is a protein that's used to make aspartame, aka NutraSweet(tm), and that phenylketonurics are people who are unable to process phenylalanine.


Well, one day someone asked me about aspartame and about whether it caused headaches, because they got headaches whenever they drank diet pop. Remembering that one symptom of phenylketonurics is that pheynalalanine can cause them headaches (and even mental retardation!) I thought it useful to look it up and again, and show them the article I found, because they also said they got similar headaches from almonds, which naturally contain phenylalanine.[**]

Well, I type in phenylalanine into google and the first site in the results is a site called Go take a look. The site is hilarious if read it carefully.

It appears to be common e-mail spam cleverly disguised as an article on phenylalanine. Everything is in there: herbal Viagra, buy real Viagra online, penis enlargement, and even AdultFriendFinder. The only thing missing were Tawny and her naughty friends! ;)

So here's my thought: the guy who made this site is a spammer. He figures a lot of people drink diet pop and have no clue what phenylalanine or phenylketonurics are. So they type 'phenylalanine' into google, and his site, which has somehow cleverly got around the google pageranking system is right up at the top. They click the headline, which says 'phenylaline and sexual enhancement' and boom, get this "article" which actually appears to be the Ultimate Web Spam!

Ingenious! Spam on every bottle of diet pop on the planet!

Why didn't I think of that? ;)

[*] pop == what we call 'soda' in Detroit
[**] why do people ask me this stuff? I dunno. maybe they think I'm smart. Maybe it's cause I'm an herbalist. I dunno. *shrug*

User Journal

Journal Journal: Question for Sun people 11

I tried to get an Ultra 60 this morning booted into single user by issuing a Stop-A and a "boot -s". The thing wouldn't do it. It insisted on trying to mount all the NFS mounts, one of which isn't working due to a server that is down and being changed. I wanted the Ultra 60 booted into single user mode to comment out the appropriate line from the /etc/vfstab.

Unfortunately, the stupid thing wouldn't boot into the single user mode when I issued a boot -s. It just kept on mounting NFS stuff like it was nothing. *sigh*

So I ended up booting into single user mode off a Solaris installation CD-ROM with "boot cdrom -s" instead. Then I fixed the problem by "mount /dev/dsk/c0t0d0s0 /mnt" and then "vi /mnt/etc/vfstab" ;)

The question is: WTF wouldn't the thing boot into single user mode off the HDD? I don't get it. I banged on it for an hour before giving up and seraching for the dang install CD. Anybody got any clues? Something I should look for?

User Journal

Journal Journal: Weekly Recap(tm): Butt-fucking animal-assed late! 52

Weekly Recap(tm): Because enquiring geeks wanna know!

Woah! Surak is apparently suffering from amnesia after being hit on the head with a brick by SolemnDragon! He can't seem to remember anything about bethanie or their recent episodes with public sex. Sol's Wicked and Evil twins also had an encounter with the Good Twin who returned from her watery grave. The Wicked and Evil twins apparently got a hold of the Zippo again, because Sol cleaned her apartment again, which apparently involves "matches AND a fire hose".

Meanwhile, Bethanie has found a new a TechnoLust. Quote: "It was bad enough when I lunged and embraced TL intimately (copping a thorough feel whilst I was at it, for good measure!); it took all of Hubby's willpower not to take TL outside and thrash his philandering ass." So apparently, Bethanie is none the worse for wear over Surak's recent amnesia, instead opting for new trysts with TechnoLust and gmhowell. More details on gmhowell to come.BethaniesHubby was notably silent on the issue.

berniecase, noticing how bad pop music is, has decided to to use it to kill people. No word on how successful bernie has been, but the songs of death have included "Rock With you" by Michael Jackson and "Around the World" by Daft Punk. Em Emalb apparently got in on the action singing his rendition of "Easy Like Sunday Morning" by the Lionel Richie. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Sulli has apparently decided to set himself on fire in the Burning Man event at Black Rock City. Sulli is, in fact The Burning Man.

sparky4 has been learning things from puppies. Amongst the things she has learned: sit, rollover, play dead, and shake. Apparently, she accomplished all of these tasks by Labor Day.

Some Womanwas found sptting Vodka in the face of Jesus. The Pope was notably silent on the issue.

Turg apparently amused by the simplest of things, like this colour matcher would like to know something about colour theory. Apparently turg is colour blind because he didn't actually try using the thing, unlike your intrepid reporter.,

Things are Looking up for LadyGuardian, which is especially good given the fact that she sucks at ass o'clock. Whatever that means.

NaveWeiss's tactlessness has cost him a friend. And he's somehow surprised.

Heliocentric would like you to donate money so that he can cause mayhem. If he's going to cause mayhem, why doesn't he just steal the money?

robi2106 wants you to know that "most girls are evil". And robi wonders why he can't get a date, It might be okay to think that, robi, but never, ever say it outloud.

FortKnox is starting his NEW photo contest! Now your chance to sign up. Let WeeklyRecap(tm) know that we can use the photo, and maybe, just maybe, we'll put out a WeeklyRecap(tm) special photo edition! WOuldn't that be cool?

Servo apparently is a moron. That is all.

Red Warrior, who apparently dresses in business casual, will "personally tend to ignore your clothes", however. Ick. Hey, Red: the 90s called, they want their clothes back.

And, finally, SamTheButcher has been airing his laundry and, apparently, his garbage as well. And he wants to "ANYBODY NEEDS A LINUX ADMIN IN COLORADO???" He's serious.

Oh yeah...get all of your hosting needs from basic websites to dedicated servers from Tell Erica that Surak sent ya. ;)

User Journal

Journal Journal: Weekly Recap(tm) has the day off and will return tomorrow 35

for our special post-Labor Day edition.

In the meantime... pizza delivery people: what's up with that? The guy got pissed off because he had to drive 3 miles, my pizza didn't arrive til an hour and a half later, and then it's cold. And the most he does is give me $5 off?


What happened to service?


Journal Journal: Living it up geek style! 74

Here are some useful things I've learned as a techie bachelor living by himself. Geeks still living in their parents' basement need not apply. (And I just pissed off about half of Slashdot. ;)

Economic tips

Soda: Here in Detroit we call it 'pop'. So if when I say 'pop' I mean soda. Most geeks are caffeine addicts and drink soda by the gallon. Don't buy individual pops. Two-litre bottles are a good choice, especially since you can get them in the gas stations for as little as $0.89 (plus deposit). Read the ads for your favorite supermarket chain. Some of them like this one that many of you have never heard of but is big in the Midwest even put them online. Scan for sales on pop! I just picked up a few 12-packs of Diet Coke for $1.69 each.

Printer paper: Go to OfficeMax or someplace like that and get one of the inbox trays you undoubtedly have at work on your desk. Or steal it from work. I didn't tell you to do that. ;) Keep it next to your printer. Put all of those extra blank pages and aborted pages and any extra pages you have lying around in the tray, all facing one way. Flip it over. Now you have extra paper to print stuff like directions from Mapquest or phone numbers from on! (Also, if you can get away with it...print big stuff at work. Shhh! I didn't tell you that either! ;)

Food: Pizza and Chinese food have long been hacker staples. Eating delivery pizza and take-out Chinese every night can get expensive. Stir fry is one of those dishes that's as good as Chinese carry out (IMHO) and it's easy and cheap to make and takes <15 minutes, including prep time!

First off, invest a few dollars into a George Foreman Lean Mean Grilling Machine. You can get one of the small units with a bun warmer for as little as $50 at your local discount chain store. Also, you need a wok or a large frying pan. The non-stick kind. And an egg turner or large wooden spoon or fork or something to stir with. A kitchen knife for the meat.

Next, stock up on stir fry vegetables. I use pre-cut frozen stir fry vegetables that you can get for as little as $1 for a 1 lb. bag. (Ewww..frozen? In a stir fry you will never be able to tell the difference. Trust me.) And rice or noodles if you prefer. These are cheap.

Meat, if you eat that sort of thing: watch the specials. I usually get chicken breast fillets or pork tenderloins.

Oil. I use a nice extra-virgin olive oil, which tends to be a bit expensive, but you can use other oils. Olive oil is healthy and doesn't leave any odd tastes on your food though.

Sauce. You can make a sauce, but I personally just pick up a bottle of Kikkoman Stir Fry Sauce or Teryaki sauce. Most supermarkets carry a nice variety of different Asian-cooking type sauces and sauce mixes. The mixes are cheap, so you might wanna consider those, especially since you can always doctor 'em up more easily than the stuff in a bottle.

Cooking it up
Plug the grilling machine in (it takes 5 mins to warm up), and start preheat your wok or pan to 350 F. Get out your meat and start cutting any extra fat off and cut the meat into cubes. By the time you finish with that, the wok should be ready to add oil...add some oil to the walk. Get out your vegetables. You need about 1/2 of a 1 lb bag per person. Throw those in the pan or wok and stir. They need to cook for 5-10 minutes. Keep stirring them every 15-30 seconds or so. Take your meat, and toss it on the grilling machine. This will take about as long as the vegetables.

When the meat is done cooking, toss it in the wok with the pan, add your sauce, any additional seasonings you want, and stir. Let it cook about another minute or two. Serve and enjoy.

If you want RICE or NOODLES, follow the directions on the package for making those. You'll typically want to start your rice or noodles before you start anything else.

Housekeeping tips

General Cleaning: To avoid having to spend your Saturday or Sunday cleaning your place, start doing this. Take 5 minutes every day and do something to clean your place. Pick up clutter, dust off a table, vaccum a room etc. Use a stopwatch. Live by the stopwatch. You'd be surprised at how much stuff you can get done in 5 minutes. Then, when the weekend does roll around,
you won't have to spend all day cleaning, just maybe half an hour or so straightening up.

One bathroom tip: Completely remove the toilet seat from your toilet now and'd be VERY SURPRISED at how much disgusting germs and slime accumulate where the hinges attach to the bowl. Ew. :)

Okay, this has gotten WAYYY to long... more in a later JE!

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The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth. -- Niels Bohr