Are You Prepared For the Zombie Apocalypse?
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Missing option... (Score:4, Insightful)
Why would you want to be? If civilization falls around you and you're spending the rest of your short life on the run, in fear, not much hope of a future (only a few zombie books have animals eventually becoming zombies) then why not just burn in the fire?
Everytime I play Fallout I ask myself if I would seriously want to survive a nuclear winter, how would zombie horde be much difference?
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in fear, not much hope of a future
Isn't this basically the inevitable outcome, zombies or no, unless you're in the 1%?
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Maybe you'd make it? Maybe you'd make a difference on the way? Who knows.
It's not the big names in the history books which made us big and what we are today...it were those which just survived against all odds.
I only care about real and substantial threats (Score:4, Insightful)
So I really don't prepare for attack by zombie, space alien, terrorist (you're more likely to be killed by a household appliance), or even bears. Instead, I worry about things that are much more likely to kill me, like drunk drivers.
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-1, Downer
I don't think joking about zombie attacks mitigates real world threats, but you just had to use any chance available to get in a quick jab, didn't you.
Re:I only care about real and substantial threats (Score:5, Funny)
Cheer up!
You can still get killed by a drunk Zombie.
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So I really don't prepare for attack by zombie, space alien, terrorist (you're more likely to be killed by a household appliance), or even bears. Instead, I worry about things that are much more likely to kill me, like drunk drivers.
You're so going to get eaten alive in the second reel... right after the two kids having underage sex and the stoner.
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Are you kidding? The hard-nosed realist either survives, or is the last to die, sacrificing himself so that the Final Girl has a fighting chance to escape.
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While I'd run for my life in a life or death situation, I don't generally fear dying. Friends and family would mourn but the world would go on and I'd be dead, so I won't care. Horror scenarios to me isn't being killed by a drunk driver, it's being horribly maimed with lots of pain, suffering and permanent disability. But I think that people that go through life worrying about everything lose in the end, because death catches up to all of us. Don't be too reckless, have insurance if disaster strikes and oth
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In that case you should really just concentrate on Cancer, Heart conditions, and Stroke, as those probably get 80% of us in the end anyway.
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At least this is how I think about it.
Voted I don't believe.. (Score:2)
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Likewise, while the idea of a zombie apocalypse is silly, there are plenty of perfectly natural disasters that could severely inconvenience me for quite a while before the government gets its ass in gear. I have a couple of water filters, some lifeboat food packs, emergency blankets, medical supplies, that sort of thing, packed into a small bag.
Eat Lead, Zombie Shakespeare. (Score:2)
I work next to cadaver delivery & storage... (Score:4, Funny)
I work next to cadaver delivery & storage for a medical science building, and am therefore basically doomed in case of zombies.
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Don't think of it as being "doomed", think of it as a quick, if involuntary, conversion to the winning side.
(captcha: "screams". heh.)
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In retrospect, realising that zombies are primarily dangerous when roaming in large groups. I'm not about to enquire exactly how many cadavers are on-hand at any point in time, but suspect it's no more than a dozen or so. There's a good chance I can be running by the time they're getting out of the room, and haven't infected many yet...
Not that I'm planning this at all...
as long as I have... (Score:2)
Meh (Score:2)
If you go by the metaphysics in "The Walking Dead" the zombies aren't really zombies, they are people who died, decomposed for a few hours and whose vital signs came back. They are subject to biological laws.
All you have to do is wait about ten days for the "dead" to die of dehydration ( the seem to be dumb to turn on a faucet, assuming the power plants are still operating and water is still flowing ) or about two months until they all starve to death.
In the meantime you go find some island ( I'm assumin
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The Walking Dead, not being the result of some metaphysical origin, have the same needs as anyone else. They just died for a while, decomposed a bit and reanimated. Thus they can die of thirst and starvation.
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The walking dead do not explain what the hell happened. There is no way to know how they operate.
However, a decapitated head still moves, so they don't depend on blood flow or oxygen. That pretty much proves that whatever causes it, it is nothing like normal biological processes and there is no way to know.
If you read the comic, it is clear the dead walk for months, possibly years. So again, they do not die of thirst or starvation.
You have your reference all wrong.
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A virus creates TWD, and no virus can run an organism without energy, water, etc.
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No. They assumed it was a virus, then they found out that people who die of natural causes also raise as zombies.
There is also the empirical proof present in the comic. A mundane virus does not explain zombies in TWD.
Have you read the comic? Its pretty clearly laid out.
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Did you watch the last episode of Season 1? The CDC scientist said it was a virus ( not witchcraft, satan or some supernatural cause which would let dead things exist and exist apart from physical laws --- movement without energy )
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Watch? Episode? Its a series of graphic novels still being published. Try going to the original source.
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I'm a fan of the TV show and that is what I am concerned about. Happy Monday.
Hurray for cowboyneal! (Score:5, Informative)
Long time no see, friend!
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CN gets my vote, even though I have no zombie aspirations!
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Seeing the option I became so happy that I poured hot grits down my pants without thinking.
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Indeed! Great to see the return of the CN option. I very nearly voted it. But then the understanding of the actual choice's words overrode the joy of the presence of the words Cowboy Neal within them, and I shivered and backed slowly away from the mouse. Even Zombies take a pass on Cowboy Neal Brain.
Planning and preparation (Score:2)
What about the "zombies are uninterested" option? (Score:2)
First and foremost, zombies seek and desire brains.
Just by this fact alone makes me completely safe from a zombie invasion.
Hard copies of my zombie attack plan... (Score:2)
Hard copies of my zombie attack plan are in the fire safe.
Ha! I know, I'll keep my brains in the fire safe, and just carry a decoy zombie attack brain with a few low-denomination neurons and an expired cortex or two to hand over to any marauding undead.
Oh, wait, I already did. Dur.... where key to fire safe?
I work at the Space Center, (Score:2)
I'm in a Cold War era building with no windows, a big diesel generator, a stash of hurricane supplies in a steel cage inside of another steel cage. There's lots of security to thin the oncoming hoard that gets through the fence and act as fodder. If I'm not at work when the outbreak occurs I'm getting here as quick as I can and barricading myself in until the first wave dies down, then I'm hopping in the hurricane rescue truck when it comes time to leave. (we may have a swat wagon somewhere on site, if I
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Failing that I'm heading to an island in the gulf and living off of seafood. I might just make sure Galveston is secure and blow the bridge.
Don't have the gear, but I have the destination (Score:2)
My city has the original Hudson's Bay fort still intact in the river valley. It's a tourist attraction, but everything is maintained to 1880's standards, with no extra doors or windows cut in. Swing those big 20' wood log doors shut, and you've got yourself an instant fortress. Farmland just outside (and room enough to garden inside), plenty of living space, and easy access to the river. And it's only about 15 minutes from my house.
So, my plan is - grab the family, grab all the camping gear and food the car
It all depends... (Score:2)
Are they mindless automatons, incapable of working together or forming even rudimentary plans? Or, do they still retain their cognitive abilities? Are they stiff and slow moving, or can they run, jump, and still have reflexes?
And
Missing Option (Score:2)
However, I hope buy a house outside the city some time next year, and when I have my own house I *will* build an underground bunker (my girlfriend thinks I'm joking) that can be used for - among other things - hiding from zombies. I just hope that the zombie apocalypse or World War 3 or the next (real) Black Death-grade pandemic doesn't start until I'm finished.
And if nothing happens, well, then I'll have a perfect data dungeon!
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I *will* build an underground bunker (my girlfriend thinks I'm joking) that can be used for - among other things - hiding from
tornados? Where I live its a very realistic concern, I can think of three little villages within 20 miles that have gotten hit within the past decade. I suppose if you live in Arizona its not a realistic concern? Smashed a outdoor "living history" museum, smashed a warehouse nearby my kid's doctor about 20 minutes after we left his appointment, and blew away most of a small farm village 15 miles SE of my home.
I would strongly advise placing your home servers in the basement bunker, because its naturally
Everyone's first answer is wrong (Score:5, Insightful)
Whenever discussions of the inevitable zombiepocalypse start up, folks always talk about how prepared they are, which is the on-ramp to the much more boring conversation about what guns they own. Don't get me wrong, guns are great. I don't own one, but appreciate the right to own one (even if it think the wording / logic (in Jefferson's time, everyone would have been in a militia, ergo the 2nd amendment is clear.) could be a little more clear and concrete). But there's a handful of problems with guns in terms of disaster preparedness tools:
-You can't eat them.
-You can't drink them.
-They can't power your well, sump pump, freezer, or furnace
-A gun doesn't do a very good job of providing you information about the weather, news updates from the CDC, or other emergency management information.
-1000 rounds of ammunition == approximately 1000 dead zombies +/- your accuracy. This becomes a problem when the zombie population goes > 1000 zombies. A delta of zombies is a bad thing.
-Guns cannot process large game into juicy delicious steaks all by themselves.
(and before you say "a gun can get you all of those things" it can't. It takes a person willing to carry that gun across the street to their neighbor's house and blow that guy's brains out to get those things. Internet tough-guying aside, a human has to make that choice. i would wager, for most of us decent human beings, it's far easier to use a gun to keep someone from taking what you have when it's all that's keeping you alive, than it is to flip the switch in your mind and go take that stuff from someone else. YMMV.)
The current zombie fascination brings to light a really good set of ideas. The topic forces you to think about how prepared you are in the event of a disaster, but too often you get sidetracked into "Me, a six pack, a tall building, a Barret .50 cal, and a big box of ammo" games. No matter where you live (Midwestern-US centric poster here, but the generic ideas apply world wide), you should be able to plan for life with "help" for between 72 hours to as long as 14 days, or longer.
You can use zombies as the driving force in the thought exercise, but think critically. If you're snowed in for two weeks, what do you need? Food, water, heat. What if there's no running water? No electricity? Run the game out even longer in your mind. Say you've got kerosene lamps for light and a little warmth, what happens if one gets knocked over? Do you have a fire extinguisher? Is it current and charged? When was the last time you started your generator? Do you have enough insulin on hand? Thoughts like that may end up doing you far more good one day than thinking "We'll head to the Winchester!"
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I have 2 weeks of food and water, chainsaw, machete and axe, its a necessity when you live in a hurricane zone. I do not have an adequate supply of fuel or ammo though. I can fix the ammo problem, but don't have a good way to store fuel in my apartment.
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Re:Everyone's first answer is wrong (Score:5, Informative)
Don't get me wrong, guns are great. I don't own one, but appreciate the right to own one (even if it think the wording / logic (in Jefferson's time, everyone would have been in a militia, ergo the 2nd amendment is clear.) could be a little more clear and concrete)
I hear this all of the time from people who have some information about the topic. Let me show you something.
I AM THE MILITIA [cornell.edu]
(a) The militia of the United States consists of all able-bodied males at least 17 years of age and, except as provided in section 313 of title 32, under 45 years of age who are, or who have made a declaration of intention to become, citizens of the United States and of female citizens of the United States who are members of the National Guard.
(b) The classes of the militia are—
(1) the organized militia, which consists of the National Guard and the Naval Militia; and
(2) the unorganized militia, which consists of the members of the militia who are not members of the National Guard or the Naval Militia.
This is not some obscure 18th century codex, it's the law of the land as of right now. The individual right to keep and bear arms is crystal clear. The people who pretend otherwise have an agenda of disarmament.
i would wager, for most of us decent human beings, it's far easier to use a gun to keep someone from taking what you have when it's all that's keeping you alive, than it is to flip the switch in your mind and go take that stuff from someone else.
Never, and I do mean NEVER underestimate what people will do when their children are crying out in hunger. If it meant the difference between my children eating or starting to death, I'd waylay unsuspecting travelers all day night long. Most other parents would do so as well.
LK
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even if it think the wording / logic (in Jefferson's time, everyone would have been in a militia, ergo the 2nd amendment is clear.)
People say this a lot and it makes me question the average person's reading comprehension skills. The amendment is not vague, it is not unclear - it says exactly what they meant it to say. It is my belief that anyone who tries to instill doubt about the intentions/clearness of this amendment is selling something, and it's something no one should want to buy. Here is the text, emphasis mine to highlight how clear and unambiguous it really is:
A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
Reading Comprehension Breakdown:
1) It is very clear that they want
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1) I agree that the purpose of the amendment is to establish a right. I'm disputing that the text itself does that explicitly. It doesn't state "the people have the right to bear arms". Literally, it only states that this already existing right can't be infringed (which to me seems superfluous, as I thought this was the de-facto understanding of a right). This is the same difference as between "the dragons on the moon cannot be eaten" vs "there are dragons on the moon". The first doesn't explicitly imply the second.
The purpose of this Amendment is to officially recognize a Right. The founder's belief on Rights is that they are inherent, granted by our Creator, and are inalienable. From their perspective, the government doesn't grant Rights, it is only forbidden from infringing upon them. This Amendment officially establishes that the Right to Keep and Bear arms exists (by referencing it) and that the Government shall not infringe it.
Reminds me of a riddle/joke I heard once before. A professor walks into his class and
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Crystal clear it most certainly is not.
If you had grown up here with a lifelong knowledge of our history, it would be.
Even people that argue against it, don't really misunderstand. They don't like what it says and they like to pretend otherwise.
LK
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You seem to think that I mean that a soon as things go to shit, I think it's preferable to start picking off the unwary.
No. I'm referring to the last resort. In other words, there's nothing that I can think of that I wouldn't do to keep the people that I care about alive.
LK
Re:Everyone's first answer is wrong (Score:4, Informative)
Try reading DC v Heller. The SCOTUS has opined the 2nd Amendment's main purpose is to clarify self defense. Not militia purposes. Not common defense.
Bradys cried very hard on 6/26/08 and 6/28/10.
sick of zombies (Score:2)
Really, zombies are the new [insert fad of the year here]. Don't we realize by now that one of the prime reason zombies are so popular right now is that they give us an opportunity to shoot, kill, maim human beings in our games and movies with a thin layer of "but they're not really humans" so we don't have to deal with all this complicated moral issues?
Really, I'd like to have a bit more of the complicated moral issues and less of the horrible pseudo-science-made-up-nonsense.
For everything else:
http://www. [cracked.com]
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Ha, reminds me of a conversation I had with my mother-in-law Re: L4D :
"ah, so they don't look like humans, so it's OK to shoot them"
"actually, the more I play, the more I see how normal humans act like zombies"
good times.
Real-world zombies (Score:3)
I am completely prepared (Score:2)
I mean, in reality, as opposed to video games, zombies shamble, they don't run, they smell bad, and are not exactly bright (and, unlike a book I recently bought for entertainment value, but gave up on in on in a chapter or two, as the lead character, a hot chick zombie, was all about expensive designer fashion... I kid you not), and anyone who knows anything about zombies knows that my pound box of kosher salt is all I need to handle a number of them, and a few more boxes, and I can stop a brigade....
Prepared for hunting (Score:2)
Laugh all you want ... (Score:2)
But my neighbor works for the local health department, and they use the phrase 'zombie apocalypse' to describe any sort of large-scale problem with panic. (pandemic flu, MRSA, swine flu concerns, etc.). They even have plans for how to best prepare mass graves (including information on compaction), etc.
And even with all that, I'm not as well prepared as I could be, as I don't have sufficient water to survive for a week, or cooking and alternative heating fuel.
Shamelessly stolen from the 2012 apocalypse poll (Score:2)
One option was shamelessly stolen from the 2012 apocalypse poll:
I am completely unprepared for this fictional event
I think the zombie apocalypse is far more likely than any mayan calendar end of the universe 2012 scenario.
Another type of zombie (Score:2)
If you meant the zombie-apocalypse where zombie-computers take down the internet then I choose
H) Woefully unprepared
For the undead kind I'm primarily enlightened by World War Z
Why a Zombie Outbreak Would Fail (Score:5, Interesting)
1) Too Many Natural Predators, including insects that would render rotting flesh useless pretty quickly.
2) Zombies don't like hot weather: dead bodies bloat within weeks due to stomach gases and start exploding, and in extreme heat they would shrivel like raisins.
3) Zombies don't like cold weather: frozen meat becomes rigid
4) Biting isn't a good way to spread disease: rabies turns animals into violent biting machines, but have you ever been bitten by a rabid dog? Probably not, and these are fast animals with teeth and claws, if rabies doesn't spread well then slow human zombies wouldn't do any better than fast dogs. And remember SARS or the bird flu? That's spread through the air and was difficult to determine who had it but we managed to stop those diseases, zombies would be much easier to identify.
5) Zombies can't heal: every time a zombie fell or was injured they break bones and lose body parts without anyone there to patch them back up, and the human body is pretty weak, many household items could be used to easily kill a zombie like a shovel, bat, hammer, sledgehammer, 2x4, chainsaw, etc. If someone broke in your house to kill you right now what would you use to kill them with? Whatever comes to mind are your zombie weapons.
6) Zombie-Proof Barriers (and zombies don't use tools): Go punch your front door. Ouch! Now kick it. Ouch again! So if you had to break in your door what would you use? Sledgehammer would probably work, but zombies don't use tools so something as simple as a door is enough to keep zombies out. Also anyone in a office building has all the furniture in the building to use to crush zombies with from the roof so any zombies in a city would be in for a world of hurt.
7) We have a lot of guns: there are almost 15 million hunting licenses in the US [nssf.org] and that doesn't count people with guns that don't need a hunting license like handguns or the military and the police. There are 300 million people in the US [google.com] so even if the entire US was zombies except for the 15 million with hunting licenses each person would only need to kill 20 zombies. That doesn't sound too difficult.
8) Zombies feed and reproduce with world's #1 predator: Imagine if every time you wanted to eat something or have sex you had to first kill someone but everyone knew you were coming? How long do you think you would last? Probably not very long, someone would kill you off or you would starve to death quickly, but that's the life of a zombie.
So as you can see zombies are fun to talk about but it's impossible for a zombie outbreak to become reality so there's no need to prepare for a zombie apocalypse. Movies like Halloween [wikipedia.org] and Scream [wikipedia.org] with serial killers sneaking around and killing individuals is far more likely a scenario.
I am a Vegan Zombie (Score:3, Funny)
GRAAAAAIIIIIIINS GRAINS
Crowbar (Score:3)
A friend of mine has bought a crowbar at the hardware store to slay zombies with. You have to take care to buy one of the right size. Not too long; then it's too heavy to wield. And not too short because you want to stay away from those groping hands. We succeeded in buying the right one, and my friend is very happy with it. It works well, he says.
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In the event of a Zombie Apocalypse your first stop should be your nearest police station. Chances are there is a good cache of SWAT equipment free for the taking if all of the police have already been eaten. Firearms, plus stab proof and riot gear which is perfect for protecting from Zombie bites.
Of course you will need some kind of melee weapon to take out any zombies in the Police Station but after t
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Having worked in the police for a few years I can confirm that isn't much of an option here... Being that UK police aren't allowed to carry firearms (except SO19 - or whatever theyre called this month) you'll find most stations have very little in the way of firearms. Most new police buildings are basically offices anyway, all the security is by the jails to keep those inside; inside. A zombie horde outside will have no trouble getting in for most buildings I have seen. If you could raid a so19 building (I
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SO19 is the firearms unit for the Metropolitan Police, other police forces around the country have officers trained in the use of firearms [wikipedia.org] and their own teams in place. There are various different levels of firearms usage by the police in the uk [wikipedia.org].
Of course if it is a little village police station you are out of luck but the main station for a city will almost certainly be the base of operations for any Authorised Firearms Officers in the area and have a wide range of firearms on the premises. [wikipedia.org]
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Bollocks! I've seen Hot Fuzz! I know about you UK types. ;)
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A machete is the modern equivalent to the sword, and metallurgy has advanced enough that a good machete is light, durable and flexible enough that trimmers in the christmas tree plantations can swing them all day. Find a good file though, neck bones will take the edge off your machete and it will need frequent sharpening.
Finally, a Cowboy N
Re:I do think about this time to time (Score:5, Funny)
In the event of a Zombie Apocalypse [in the UK] your first stop should be your nearest police station. Chances are there is a good cache of SWAT equipment free for the taking if all of the police have already been eaten.
So, your plan is to go to the headquarters of people who have already been eaten, in order to have access to the equipment that didn't work for them?
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Better to take the risk once to get your hands on some good equipment than take a risk every time you go out because you don't have any.
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if the "good equipment" didn't work for trained officers who knew exactly what equipment they had and how to use it, why in the world would you think it would work for you?
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Rule 1: Cardio.
Come on people, four hours with no replies and no mods? To a Zombieland reference, in a zombie themed poll? If I had the points ...
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if the "good equipment" didn't work for trained officers who knew exactly what equipment they had and how to use it, why in the world would you think it would work for you?
Due to budget cuts, police are no longer trained in zombie containment methods. This turns out to be quite the disadvantage as police will instinctively try to bully the zombies by corralling them, hitting them with pepper spray and beating them with batons. Failing these tactics, which have no effect on zombies, the police will try to embarass the zombies by strip searching them.
Basically, police that are not zombie aware will be quickly overcome.
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You just applied logic to a situation that is best described as.....unlikely to occur? I was tempted to counter your logic with some more non-reality based logic and then I got confused.....
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The nearest Territorial Army base would be a better bet. The police may have a few guns, the weekend warriors will have a lot. Public schools are also a good bet in the UK. Mine had about 20 .22 target rifles, but also 40 SA-80s and a couple of LSWs and a big pile of ammunition - a lot more than I'd expect to find in a police station.
Gun control in the UK doesn't mean guns are hard to find, it just means you don't get idiots waving them around and shooting each other by mistake.
Police call box (Score:3)
But on the way there, if you see any old and weathered police boxes, do stop to knock. You never know if there is a Timelord inside making a quick stop between time jaunts. They are wonderfully helpful in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
I have a game I play with a friend. Whenever we wander into a store of any sort, we rate it on a 1 to 10 scale based on how good it would be to lock yourself inside during a zomb
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gun control in the UK would make defence quite difficult
Hooray, someone manages to hobby horse the tyranny[tm] of gun control into a debate about zombie apocalypse. Many of the people I grew up with were trained to use a gun before their 16th birthday; my best friend had some sort of marksmanship rating before moving on to university. The result? Instead of testosterone-filled idiots, I knew a lot of testosterone-filled idiots who knew how to shoot guns. And you don't bring a knife to a gun fight, right? So that's both sides with guns, now.
I anticipate that the
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The demographic of "testosterone filled idiots" that you specifically describe doesn't actually do much of the gun violence. Note also that gun violence tends to count things that no sane person would- for instance, if you are attacked and defend yourself, or in home invasion scenario where you shoot the invader dead, both add to statistics but are legal and correct use of guns (in most states- there are always exceptions).
Anyway, you're obviously trolling. The 2nd amendment has been objectively helpful
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Plenty of military bases in and around London [www.mod.uk]
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Especially since I would be classed as a looter, yet another reason to shoot first.
Get a white person to go in front of you and shout "Don't shoot! We're finders!" XD
Re:I do think about this time to time (Score:5, Interesting)
Oh dear, as soon as I saw your nick I guessed this was going to be some angry, testosterone-filled, macho gun rant...
1. First sentence is as, "Three times as many people die from heart attack than in AIDS-infected-monkey-related deaths." The statistic acts massively against your favour: the US is infecting too many monkeys.
2. Since I'm not a coward, I'm prepared to go out in the streets and take the risk that I'm more likely in the United Kingdom to win the lottery than become a victim of "gun terror". The lack of availability of guns and the fact that the other party isn't likely to have a gun means criminals don't carry guns either - everyone's safer.
3. It's not illegal to defend yourself: it's illegal to own an unlicensed firearm or carry it in an unlicensed manner.
4.Once everyone's allowed to carry a gun with real bullets, laws about the weight of shot or the length of the barrel of your piece are mostly irrelevant.
5. I'm not scared of guns. My school had a cadet force and most people were trained in using them before the age of 16. It's not the arms, it's the arms race.
6. You seem to talk about fear a lot. Recent riots in Britain had few deaths (care to guess why and follow our example?) and everyone got over it and carried on. Twenty years ago we had the US-sponsored IRA (until those idiot Thatcherites were replaced by a group willing to understand that jaw>>war) bombing us every few weeks - my father narrowly missed one attack - and we got over it and carried on. We did not use it as an excuse to fuck over the world and ultimately ourselves (well done!).
You know, what I think it comes down to is that you're scared of other people and like to assume everyone else is the same.
Re:I do think about this time to time (Score:5, Funny)
Oh one last thing, gun control in the UK would make defence quite difficult,
Yeah, but before those zombies can attack you, they'll have to get past the Health and Safety Executive who are not going to sit idly by while people prepare unpasteurized brains for consumption without eye protection, blue latex gloves and hairnets (or, possibly, earnets). Lurching down the public highway without wearing high-vis jackets? They're in real trouble...
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Easy (Score:3)
brainzzzzzz
Exactly.
My defense against zombies would be 1 cup of coffee... after that, I outsmart them in every way.
Re:Easy (Score:5, Funny)
My defense against zombies would be 1 cup of coffee... after that, I outsmart them in every way.
Yeah, but how do you get the zombies to drink the coffee?
Re: (Score:2)
Heck I live in the North east.
During the winter they will freeze. Where you can just scoop them them up crush them to little bits.
During the summer they will be in a hot humid condition. It will stink like there is no tomorrow but that means they are slowly being eaten away from bacteria in in a few weeks they will just be a pile of bones and gue.
Fall and Spring are the most dangerous times. But during fall is hunting season so we got all the armed hunters out. Spring it is to muddy and they will get st
Re: (Score:2)
So few people in my state the zombies would starve to re-death before happening on another house.
Winters too cold, especially trying to traverse the mountains.
Summers too hot and dry, they'd be jerky before making it too far.
Don't know what these "spring" and "fall" things you speak of are. You make it sound like there's more than 2 seasons.
Re:Easy (Score:5, Informative)
Almost Winter
Winter
Still Winter
4th of July.
Re:Easy (Score:4, Funny)
Hey! What happened to road repair season?
Re: (Score:3)
It has been canceled for economic reasons.
Re: (Score:3)
Road repair isn't a season in Michigan. It's a constant, like the existence of the sky or the rising of the sun.
Re:Easy (Score:5, Interesting)
Don't know what these "spring" and "fall" things you speak of are. You make it sound like there's more than 2 seasons.
There are six seasons here in central Finland[*]: Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter, Winter, Winter. But I agree that the Spring and Autumn phases are vanishingly brief muddy transitions between the cool Summer and the frigid first and last Winters. The middle Winter is far worse, and is guaranteed to be utterly devoid of brass monkeys and zombies. Actually, brass monkeys are wary of our Summers as well...
[*] In northern Finland they dispense with the pretense of having a Summer, but they get an extra dose of Winter to compensate. Zombies are welcome, but only if they're edible...
Re: (Score:2)
Funny, I though that in the NE, at least in CNY, there were only two seasons...winter and construction.
Re: (Score:3)
Coffee's been known to work in the past. I cite the vast archives of cartoons uploaded to Youtube [youtube.com].
(Sorry, that's what I thought of when I saw your post.)
Re: (Score:3)
The answer should be pretty obvious. At least it is for us that answered "I already live in a fortified bunker with food and weapons.".
Before I continue, we don't do war planning like this just for the "zombie outbreak". It's valid for any civil disturbance. While you may think it will never happen where you are, consider that virtually everywhere has been involved in a revolution, natural disaster, or other instances where you may not want to be exposed to the general popul
Re:the first zombie (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:3)
Dude, you just freaked me out. I'll never be able to watch a zombie show again.
Re: (Score:2)
That's really disturbing. And yet, somehow, I'm not surprised.