April Fools Wrap Up 381
Thanks for the usual April Fools Day flame- every year people fall for it.
It never ceases to amaze me how angry and venomous, yet utterly clueless
a few people can be despite the blatant obviousness of the joke.
Lastly, jfengel sent us the annual April Fools RFC: RFC3251 describes "Electricity over IP" and RFC3252 on "Binary Lexical Octet Ad-hoc Transport" reformulates IP to work over XML."
In summary (Score:5, Funny)
T:What's the best High Tech Toilet?
S:AAAaaaahhh That hurt, please stop! I was just wondering if
T:Do programming languages affect your Sexual Performance?
S:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHH! Did I do something wrong? I jus
T:IP replaced Avian Carriers! It's funny, get it!
S:AAHCGH gurgle, moan. Pleash, stop the pain, I can
T:AOL is buying up useless Blog sites! I'm important! Get it?
S:AAAAAAGH! No more! Kill me now, someone, please kill m
T:Google is ranking with pigeons! Get it? Pigeons?
S:AGAHAGHAGHAGAHGa gurgle. whimper. AHGHH I'll give you anything. I'll stop plea
T:Slashdot's advertisers have demanded that we run stupid stories!
S:Ok! Ok! You fiend, I'll never troll again, please, you can have whateve
T:Mac OsX is l33t!
S:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIEEEGGGH! No! No! Please just break my knees! Please, no don't..
T:Check out this Debian Rootkit!
S:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE
S:(silence)
T:Yo, Hemos, did we kill all of 'em?
H:Ya, but better post a few more to make sure.
T:nVidia and AMD are gonna merge! Get it? MERGE.
S:(silence)
Cowboy Neal: I feel a great disturbance in the force, as if thousands of Slashdot posters
just comitted suicide. Get it? The Force?
Sllort and all you other flame addicts: (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:Sllort and all you other flame addicts: (Score:2)
I forgot to mention. (Score:2)
Yes, yes, this post is also a flame. Time to go do something real.
/. - Worse Than Vogon Poetry? (Score:3, Funny)
Thank the diety-of-your-choice that it is coming to and end!
Re:/. - Worse Than Vogon Poetry? (Score:3, Interesting)
Whats all the fuss about? Read for yourself :)
The dead swans lay in the stagnent pool.
They lay. They rotted. They turned
Around occassionally.
Bits of flesh dropped off them from
Time to time.
And sank into the pool's mire.
They also smelt a great deal.
Paula Nacy Millstone Jennings
37 Wasp Villas
Greenbridge
Essex
GB10 1LL
Re:/. - Worse Than Vogon Poetry? (Score:2, Interesting)
It was fun. (Score:2)
It certainly was :) (Score:4, Funny)
Hint: read the HTML source of that link. Things will be clearer. The CVS $Id$ is a bit of a giveaway as well :)
Re:It certainly was :) (Score:2)
What exactly was in the ISO, or was it just a dead link? I'd have been deeply amused to find out someone had burned a CD only to find out its sole contents were a text file saying "YHBT. YHL. HAN(AF)D."
/Brian
Re:It certainly was :) (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:It certainly was :) (Score:4, Funny)
I caught Microsoft redhanded [hackerheaven.org] looking at my netbsd-xbox page :)
I couldn't keep this nugget from you guys. This made my day :)
Re:In summary (Score:2, Informative)
My last post - anyone want a 50 karma account? (Score:3, Troll)
(My take on
So... (Score:4, Informative)
Re:So... (Score:2, Funny)
"No", came the answer.
::cue evil chuckling over final AFD prank.
Re:So... (Score:4, Insightful)
My god, there is so much less crap in the threads, even in spite of all the whinging-on about the so-called jokes.
I *like* Slashdot non-anon.
First Post! (Score:2, Funny)
Wait... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Wait... (Score:4, Funny)
Dude! You stole my joke! DAMN!
Wait...maybe if I titled this "April Fool's Actor seeks work..."?
Heh. Fun day. Thanks everyone for making it memorable.
is it really over? (Score:5, Funny)
*runs away in dispair*
The real editors of Slashdot today (Score:5, Funny)
(CmdrTaco seen far right.)
Re:The real editors of Slashdot today (Score:2)
Oh, how the mighty have fallen
bbh
Re:The real editors of Slashdot today (Score:3, Funny)
Who says nobody in America has to wear a burqa?
If you are the guy in the Clippy suit, please check one or more of the following:
[x] vodka
[x] pot
[x] witness relocation program
[x] dying from shame
[x] comitting suicide immediately afterwords
[x] comitting suicide while picture is being taken
[x] am actually the goatsex guy, this seemed like a step up
[x] better than having to walk around with a temporary ID badge
It looks like you are writing a slashdot news item (Score:4, Funny)
* Fuck the spelling up
* Post this multiple times as different people
* Add a stupid opinionated comment at the end
* Forget to close a HTML tag
get a clue.... (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:get a clue.... (Score:5, Troll)
Re:get a clue.... (Score:2, Interesting)
While the whole thing was a waste of time and resources, it helped to insure that real stories weren't confused with AFs.
And besides, its a bit of Monty-Pythonish humorous irritation. :-)
Re:get a clue.... (Score:2)
(So why am I here you ask? I'm here because just enough of the staff where I work are on holiday so as to make it literally impossible to get any work done.)
Re:get a clue.... (Score:2, Insightful)
I'm getting pretty sick of a lot of these complaints. Everybody still thinking about complaining, or even modding up a complainer-- Stand up for a second, step away from the keyboard, and ask yourself if this isn't going to be humonguously redundant-- more so than beatings with bad april-fool jokes. Then (still standing up) carefully step outside, (outside? you know, the "blue room" with a zillion polygons and rockin antialiasing?) and get (for one small day) a life of some sort. Seriously. Stop complaining about slashdot, and do something else for just a little while. If you think you're going to miss something, you can come back in a week and check it. But there's really no point in just complaining that you miss your usual tech&linux news fare. Because slashdot really turns into a different sort of place on april 1.
Well, maybe not THAT different
Re:get a clue.... (Score:2)
Be glad there is no story moderation (Score:4, Interesting)
Interestingly, I noticed one story (about the retiring carrier pigeons) that was a true story posted today. Any others?
Out of curiosity... (Score:3, Funny)
They weren't funny or good (Score:4, Troll)
They were repetive, unimaginative and unfunny. The best jokes are subtle - making it blatantly obvious makes it extremely unfunny. That is why you were flamed.
The BBC documentary way back in B&W TV days about spaghetti growing on trees is/was funny because it was original and completely unexpected. Unlike anything seen on
Re:They weren't funny or good (Score:2, Interesting)
"They were repetive, unimaginative and unfunny. "
to you.
Re:They weren't funny or good (Score:2)
And with the exception of the Slashdot advertising changes, they were all from other sites.
And with that one, even despite the blatantly obvious, some people still fell for it hook, line, and sinker. Although I didn't laugh at any of the posts, I did have some fun at the expense of the people who were fooled.
Re:They weren't funny or good (Score:5, Insightful)
Good points. Ever read the old Games magazine? Every issue had one fake ad buried in amongst the genuine adverts. That's another element of a good fake: you bury it in among the genuine articles. In that context it has a much better chance to fool people - and to amuse those who are alert enough to get it.
The RISKS Digest is now publishing an entire issue devoted to this April phenomenon, and has for several years. But it was much funnier back when Mr. Neuman published just one fake item in the issue.
But the blatantly obvious can be funny. Spaghetty growing on trees is pretty bleeding obvious, but it's still funny. Like the foolishness over at Freshmeat today: the new color scheme "inspired" by the X-Box. Obvious, but still funny.
--Jim
spaghetti not obvious (Score:3, Informative)
RFC 3251 in relation to Editors (Score:2)
Comment removed (Score:4, Funny)
Re:April Fools! (Score:2)
Dexter: "I'm confused."
Dee Dee: "GOOD!"
Re: (Score:2, Funny)
You've completely missed the point.... (Score:5, Informative)
Today, every story you posted was fake. There was no subtly. In addition, there was little originality; most of what's posted has been done already in one form or another. One subtle 4-1 joke, such as the advertized story of the day at /. , would have been good. Having a Slashback with a summary of 4-1 jokes around the web including the Google one and the Debian one would have been a nice evening wrapup. But having every single story for a 24hr period as fake is not funny, particularly *if* certain real stories happened today (I didn't see any, so consider yourself lucky).
Next time, take it easy. Make it subtle and find something that you *know* will get a humor-filled response by those that don't read the story, and you'll get much fewer flames and many more smiles.
Re:You've completely missed the point.... (Score:2)
You mean besides all this? [kuro5hin.org]
Re:You've completely missed the point.... (Score:3, Insightful)
ermm (Score:2)
Uhhh, hate to break it to you, but none of the "jokes" seemed to actually work this year. I mean, most people catch them each April 1, but this years' were even less successful than usual.
Taco, you're an ass. (Score:5, Insightful)
- A.P.
Re:Taco, you're an ass. (Score:4, Interesting)
Re:Taco, you're an ass. (Score:2, Interesting)
Now if they'd just made that the only tip-off of the day, it would have been a good practical joke. Instead, they beat us over the head with the unfunny bat till our skulls bled.
Oh well.
Re:Taco, you're an ass. (Score:2)
It doesn't matter how much you dress up a turd and make it pretty, it still came out of your ass.
Yer sig reminded me... you need a haircut
:)It was great... (Score:3, Insightful)
So Taco et all, keep up the great job!
Re:It was great... (Score:2)
I do have to say, though, that fake April Fools stories are much more effective in print than online, just because folks implicitly trust it more.
Re:It was great... me too! (Score:2)
As to the people it upset -- Chill, guys. Sometimes it's more fun to just go with the flow, rather than getting your knickers in a twist because it wasn't what you expected.
The funny thing is... (Score:5, Insightful)
I think what bothered me most... (Score:4, Insightful)
why be bothered about it ... (Score:2)
... the news is still going to be around on April 2nd. Don't be a victim to "now" culture. Cultivate some patience.
Re:why be bothered about it ... (Score:2)
hyacinthus.
Here here! (Score:2)
In the past Slashdot has managed to mix the jokes with real stories. But it seems that as Linux becomes important, it seems to have been declared completely irrelevant one day per year.
The thing that pisses us off isn't (just) the remarkably lame stories, it's the deliberate decision to suppress all other stories.
But life doesn't play by our rules, and some news is too important to ignore.
As a horrific example, imagine some stalker killed Bill Gates today. Or Sen. Disney (Fritz Holling) died in plane crash. It could happen, and the universe is perverse enough to make it happen on April 1st. This would certainly be newsworthy enough to warrant breaking the "jokes only" rules, yet imagine the inevitable response as many posters mistook this news as a joke.
In fact, I'm not absolutely sure some of these "jokes" were intended as such. The Debian rootkit, in particular, is a reference to a very real problem that both Red Hat and Debian developers have been struggling with for some time - how do you protect users from compromized binary packages? Get a compromized core package on the Debian or RedHat website and the automated installers will install that rootkit on a *lot* of systems. If this doesn't keep you awake at night, you don't understand the problem.
Yet now most people will be unable to see any discussion of this issue without thinking of the April Fools submission.
I have to mention ... (Score:5, Interesting)
Not just a brief item either. They did a whole half-hour segment on the "news", including interviews with Reagan administration staffers (not actors or impressionists, real staffers who were in on the joke) and with "acting provincial Governor-General" Bruce Babbitt. Really over the top stuff. I've always wondered why it never raised more of a fuss than it did.
Re:I have to mention ... (Score:2)
Milalwi
Fun with the clueless (Score:4, Funny)
The worst -- and funniest -- abuse of the clueless is AOLiza [fury.com]. Take the oldest and lamest online shrink, hook it up to a well-known message system, and you will laugh until you have trouble breathing.
God, I'm cruel and arrogant...
3251 (Score:3, Informative)
Fetch hits harder
Electricity over IP
Status of this Memo
This memo provides information for the Internet community. It does
not specify an Internet standard of any kind. Distribution of this
memo is unlimited.
Copyright Notice
Copyright (C) The Internet Society (2002). All Rights Reserved.
Abstract
Mostly Pointless Lamp Switching (MPLampS) is an architecture for
carrying electricity over IP (with an MPLS control plane). According
to our marketing department, MPLampS has the potential to
dramatically lower the price, ease the distribution and usage, and
improve the manageability of delivering electricity. This document
is motivated by such work as SONET/SDH over IP/MPLS (with apologies
to the authors). Readers of the previous work have been observed
scratching their heads and muttering, "What next?". This document
answers that question.
This document has also been written as a public service. The "Sub-
IP" area has been formed to give equal opportunity to those working
on technologies outside of traditional IP networking to write
complicated IETF documents. There are possibly many who are
wondering how to exploit this opportunity and attain high visibility.
Towards this goal, we see the topics of "foo-over-MPLS" (or MPLS
control for random technologies) as highly amenable for producing a
countless number of unimplementable documents. This document
illustrates the key ingredients that go into producing any "foo-
over-MPLS" document and may be used as a template for all such work.
1. Conventions used in this document
The key words "MUST", "MUST NOT", "DO", "DON'T", "REQUIRED", "SHALL",
"SHALL NOT", "SHOULD", "SHOULD NOT", "RECOMMENDED", "MAY", "MAY BE"
and "OPTIONAL" in this document do not mean anything.
Rajagopalan Informational [Page 1]
RFC 3251 Electricity over IP 1 April 2002
2. Pre-requisite for reading this document
While reading this document, at various points the readers may have
the urge to ask questions like, "does this make sense?", "is this
feasible?," and "is the author sane?". The readers must have the
ability to suppress such questions and read on. Other than this, no
specific technical background is required to read this document. In
certain cases (present document included), it may be REQUIRED that
readers have no specific technical background.
3. Introduction
It was recently brought to our attention that the distribution
network for electricity is not an IP network! After absorbing the
shock that was delivered by this news, the following thoughts
occurred to us:
1. Electricity distribution must be based on some outdated technology
(called "Legacy Distribution System" or LDS in the rest of the
document).
2. An LDS not based on the Internet technology means that two
different networks (electricity and IP) must be administered and
managed. This leads to inefficiencies, higher cost and
bureaucratic foul-ups (which possibly lead to blackouts in
California. We are in the process of verifying this using
simulations as part of a student's MS thesis).
3. The above means that a single network technology (i.e., IP) must
be used to carry both electricity and Internet traffic.
4. An internet draft must be written to start work in this area,
before someone else does.
5. Such a draft can be used to generate further drafts, ensuring that
we (and CCAMP, MPLS or another responsible working group) will be
busy for another year.
6. The draft can also be posted in the "white papers" section of our
company web page, proclaiming us as revolutionary pioneers.
Hence the present document.
4. Terminology
MPLampS: Mostly Pointless Lamp Switching - the architecture
introduced in this document.
Lamp: An end-system in the MPLampS architecture (clashes with the
IETF notion of end-system but of course, we DON'T care).
LER: Low-voltage Electricity Receptor - fancy name for "Lamp".
Rajagopalan Informational [Page 2]
RFC 3251 Electricity over IP 1 April 2002
ES: Electricity source - a generator.
LSR: Load-Switching Router - an MPLampS device used in the core
electricity distribution network.
LDS: Legacy Distribution System - an inferior electricity
distribution technology that MPLampS intends to replace.
RSVP: Rather Screwed-up, but router Vendors Push it - an IP signaling
protocol.
RSVP-TE: RSVP with Tariff Extensions - RSVP adaptation for MPLampS,
to be used in the new deregulated utilities environment.
CRLDP: for CRying out Loud, Don't do rsvP - another IP signaling
protocol.
OSPF: Often Seizes-up in multiPle area conFigurations - a
hierarchical IP routing protocol.
ISIS: It's not oSpf, yet It somehow Survives - another routing
protocol.
OSPF-TE, ISIS-TE: OSPF and ISIS with Tariff Extensions.
COPS: Policemen. Folks who scour all places for possibilities to
slip in the Common Open Policy Service protocol.
VPN: Voltage Protected Network - allows a customer with multiple
sites to receive electricity with negligible voltage fluctuation due
to interference from other customers.
SUB-IP: SUBstitute IP everywhere - an effort in the IETF to get
involved in technical areas outside of traditional IP networking
(such as MPLampS).
ITU: International Tariffed Utilities association - a utilities trade
group whose work is often ignored by the IETF.
5. Background
We dug into the electricity distribution technology area to get some
background. What we found stunned us, say, with the potency of a
bare 230V A/C lead dropped into our bathtub while we were still in
it. To put it simply, electricity is generated and distributed along
a vast LDS which does not have a single router in it (LSR or
otherwise)! Furthermore, the control of devices in this network is
mostly manual, done by folks driving around in trucks. After
Rajagopalan Informational [Page 3]
RFC 3251 Electricity over IP 1 April 2002
wondering momentarily about how such a network can exist in the 21st
century, we took a pencil and paper and sketched out a scenario for
integrating the LDS network with the proven Internet technology. The
fundamental points we came up with are:
1. IP packets carry electricity in discrete, digitized form.
2. Each packet would deliver electricity to its destination (e.g., a
device with an IP address) on-demand.
3. MPLS control will be used to switch packets within the core LDS,
and in the edge premises. The architecture for this is referred
to as Mostly-Pointless Lamp Switching (MPLampS).
4. The MPLampS architectural model will accommodate both the overlay
model, where the electricity consuming devices (referred to as
"lamps") are operated over a distinct control plane, and the peer
model, in which the lamps and the distribution network use a
single control plane.
5. RSVP-TE (RSVP with Tariff Extensions) will be used for
establishing paths for electricity flow in a de-regulated
environment.
6. COPS will be used to support accounting and policy.
After jotting these points down, we felt better. We then noted the
following immediate advantages of the proposed scheme:
1. Switches and transformers in the LDS can be replaced by LSRs,
thereby opening up a new market for routers.
2. Electricity can be routed over the Internet to reach remote places
which presently do not have electricity connections but have only
Internet kiosks (e.g., rural India).
3. Electrical technicians can be replaced by highly paid IP network
administrators, and
4. The IETF can get involved in another unrelated technology area.
In the following, we describe the technical issues in a vague manner.
6. Electricity Encoding
The Discrete Voltage Encoding (DVE) scheme has been specified in ITU
standard G.110/230V [2] to digitize electrical voltages. In essence,
an Electricity Source (ES) such as a generator is connected to a DV
encoder that encodes the voltage and current, and produces a bit
stream. This bit stream can be carried in IP packets to various
destinations (referred to as LERs - Low-voltage Electricity
Receptors) on-demand. At the destination, a DV decoder produces the
right voltage and current based on the received bit stream. It is to
be determined whether the Real-time Transport Protocol (RTP) can be
Rajagopalan Informational [Page 4]
RFC 3251 Electricity over IP 1 April 2002
used for achieving synchronization and end-to-end control. We leave
draft writing opportunities in the RTP area to our friends and
colleagues.
7. MPLampS Architecture
7.1 Overview
In an LDS, the long-haul transmission of electricity is at high
voltages. The voltage is stepped down progressively as electricity
flows into local distribution networks and is finally delivered to
LERs at a standard voltage (e.g., 110V). Thus, the LDS is a
hierarchical network. This immediately opens up the possibility of
OSPF and ISIS extensions for routing electricity in a transmission
network, but we'll contain the urge to delve into these productive
internet draft areas until later. For the present, we limit our
discussion merely to controlling the flow of electricity in an IP-
based distribution network using MPLampS.
Under MPLampS, a voltage is equated to a label. In the distribution
network, each switching element and transformer is viewed as a load-
switching router (LSR). Each IP packet carrying an electricity flow
is assigned a label corresponding to the voltage. Electricity
distribution can then be trivially reduced to the task of label
(voltage) switching as electricity flows through the distribution
network. The configuration of switching elements in the distribution
network is done through RSVP-TE to provide electricity on demand.
We admit that the above description is vague and sounds crazy. The
example below tries to add more (useless) details, without removing
any doubts the reader might have about the feasibility of this
proposal:
Example: Turning on a Lamp
It is assumed that the lamp is controlled by an intelligent device
(e.g, a (light) switch with an MPLampS control plane). Turning the
lamp on causes the switch to issue an RSVP-TE request (a PATH message
with new objects) for the electricity flow. This PATH message
traverses across the network to the ES. The RESV message issued in
return sets up the label mappings in LSRs. Finally, electricity
starts flowing along the path established. It is expected that the
entire process will be completed within a few seconds, thereby giving
the MPLampS architecture a distinct advantage over lighting a candle
with a damp match stick.
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RFC 3251 Electricity over IP 1 April 2002
7.2 Overlay vs Peer Models
As noted before, there are two control plane models to be considered.
Under the overlay model, the lamps and the distribution network
utilize distinct control planes. Under the peer model, a single
control plane is used. A number of arguments can be made for one
model versus the other, and these will be covered in the upcoming
framework document. We merely observe here that it is the lamp
vendors who prefer the peer model against the better judgement of the
LSR vendors. We, however, want to please both camps regardless of
the usefulness of either model. We therefore note here that MPLampS
supports both models and also migration scenarios from overlay to
peer.
7.3 Routing in the Core Network
The above description of the hierarchical distribution system
immediately opens up the possibility of applying OSPF and ISIS with
suitable extensions. The readers may rest assured that we are
already working on such concepts as voltage bundling, multi-area
tariff extensions, insulated LSAs, etc. Future documents will
describe the details.
7.4 Voltage Protected Networks (VPNs)
VPNs allow a customer with multiple sites to get guaranteed
electricity supply with negligible voltage fluctuations due to
interference from other customers. Indeed, some may argue that the
entire MPLampS architecture may be trashed if not for the possibility
of doing VPNs. Whatever be the case, VPNs are a hot topic today and
the readers are forewarned that we have every intention of writing
several documents on this. Specifically, BGP-support for VPNs is an
area we're presently eyeing with interest.
8. Multicast
It has been observed that there is a strong spatial and temporal
locality in electricity demand. ITU Study Group 55 has studied this
phenomenon for over a decade and has issued a preliminary report.
This report states that when a lamp is turned on in one house, it is
usually the case that lamps are turned on in neighboring houses at
around the same time (usually at dusk) [3]. This observation has a
serious implication on the scalability of the signaling mechanism.
Specifically, the distribution network must be able to handle tens of
thousands of requests all at once. The signaling load can be reduced
if multicast delivery is used. Briefly, a request for electricity is
not sent from the lamp all the way to an ES, but is handled by the
first LSR that is already in the path to another lamp.
Rajagopalan Informational [Page 6]
RFC 3251 Electricity over IP 1 April 2002
Support for this requires the application of multicast routing
protocols together with RSVP-TE shared reservation styles and the
development of MPLampS multicast forwarding mode. We are currently
studying the following multicast routing protocol:
o DVMRP: Discrete Voltage Multicast Routing Protocol - this protocol
works over existing voltage routing protocols but the danger here is
that electricity is delivered to all lamps when any one lamp is
turned on. Indeed, the switching semantics gets annoying - all lamps
get turned on periodically and those not needed must be switched off
each time manually.
Other protocols we will eventually consider are Current-Based Tree
(CBT) and Practically Irrelevant Multicast (PIM). An issue we are
greatly interested in is multicast scope: we would like support for
distributing electricity with varying scope, from lamps within a
single Christmas tree to those in entire cities. Needless to say, we
will write many detailed documents on these topics as time
progresses.
9. Security Considerations
This document MUST be secured in a locked cabinet to prevent it from
being disposed off with the trash.
10. Summary
This document described the motivation and high level concepts behind
Mostly Pointless Lamp Switching (MPLampS), an architecture for
electricity distribution over IP. MPLampS utilizes DVE (discrete
voltage encoding), and an MPLS control plane in the distribution
network. Since the aim of this document is to be a high-visibility
place-holder, we did not get into many details of MPLampS. Numerous
future documents, unfortunately, will attempt to provide these
details.
Original April Fools - Spam "protection" (Score:3, Funny)
Given What Happened To The Censorware Project (censorware.org) [sethf.com], I don't think submitting it to Slashdot as an article is even worth the e-mail.
I'll post it here just for reader enjoyment. I think it's better than many of the stories which WERE posted!
______
Spam "protection" - a modest proposal
by Seth Finkelstein [sethf.com]
April 1 2002
The problem of Spam [cauce.org], i.e. junk e-mail, has been plaguing the net for years. This article makes a modest proposal for spam "protection", in terms of a novel economic analysis leading to the benefit of all concerned.
In economic terms, let's consider why there's profit in spamming (sending large numbers of unsolicited emails). This is due to the "cost-shifting" nature of the spam process. It takes very little effort to send a large number of e-mails. But e-mail is not free (as in beer). In effect, the spammer shifts the expense of the advertising campaign, from the seller, onto ISPs and users:
- The ISP must pay (in resources) to distribute the spammer's ads
- The user must pay (in time) to delete the spammer's ads
So this is, literally, the price of free (as in speech) speech - the ISP and the user must bear the costs of the spammer's ads. Now, a frequent "technological solution" is that, once the ISP has paid to handle the spammer's mail, the user can avoid the further payment of time, by paying cash to another organization, which will perform the task of sorting out the spam. This approach is exemplified by services offered by, for example, Brightmail Inc. [brightmail.com] or SpamCop Email System [spamcop.net]But what does this sorting organization do? Its only task is to try to identify spam from real mail. That is, it is paid to try to identify mail sent from spammers [postiva.com]. However, since it is in an adversary relationship to the spammers, the spam-gangs [spamhaus.org] have every reason to try to avoid such identification.
There have been some proposals [spamlaws.com] to facilitate identification of spam by legally requiring labels. But that involves government and law. In fact, it's compelled speech! Instead, since the free market is the solution to all problems [std.com], the only proper course of action is to provide spammers with an economic incentive to identify themselves. After all, spam identification is the exact product being sold by third parties, so why pay a middle-man? If one is going to pay, for maximum market efficiency, why not pay the source?
In this scheme, the user pays a mailbox "protection fee" to an umbrella group, let's call it the "Spamafia". In return for this "protection", the "Spamafia" provides the user with a simple mailbox checking system which can be run over mail messages. Because this system works in a manner akin to passing items over a net barrier, it might be termed a "racket". So, the "racket" tests each piece of mail. Those mail messages which originate from members of the Spamafia each contain a certification token. In the process of testing the mail, this token is sent back to the Spamafia, and so redeemed to the individual spammer for a small fee, say a penny or so. In return, the user is given assurance that this message is certified as spam, and so can be automatically deleted without fear of losing legitimate mail. In essence, the spammer is given an incentive to also obtain a small amount of money from each smart user by being straightforward, rather than only trying to obtain a larger amount of money by fooling just a few suckers (and annoying everyone else).
The beauty of the system is that everyone has an incentive to participate. The spammers get more money, as the spams can generate income now from both the suckers, and the nonsuckers paying mailbox protection fees. There's no reason to evade spam-detection, in fact the opposite. The more people signed up to the protection racket, the more certification tokens are redeemed. The smart users get to have a workable mailbox, rather than one filled with junk. And they have the "peace of mind" that the mail being deleted is not important. It's the magic of the market at work.
The real problem with April Fools stories (Score:5, Insightful)
Wrap up. (Score:2, Funny)
Gullible (Score:2, Funny)
Looking..... (Score:3, Funny)
Come again partner.
"Slashvertisements" was brilliant, though. (Score:2)
Okay, maybe they could have gotten more mileage out of the Slashvertisements thing if they hadn't posted links to other AF gags, but on the whole, making all the stories part of April Fools while not commenting one way or another with smileys or "It's funny laugh" left the readers to decide whether any of it was real or not.
Overall, I found this to be quite the amusing day, and a somewhat welcome relief from normal, day-to-day
Way to go, guys!
Anyone remember the first year? (Score:5, Interesting)
Only one? (Score:3, Funny)
Only one flame? Didn't you READ the comments atached to your stories?
Just one simple question is all I've got.... (Score:4, Informative)
Re:Just one simple question is all I've got.... (Score:2)
1) People are killing each other in the middle east
2) People are killing each other in America
3) Americans are killing people in Afghanstan
4) Various groups are killing each other thorough Asia and Eastern Europe
5) The chinese government has now made killing chinese-muslims part of its contribution to international war on terrorism.
All in all, it's a pretty normal day on planet earth. Same thing has been happening more or less for the past 20,000 years.
Funniest 4/1 joke today (Score:5, Funny)
After getting chocked up with /. nonsense and other similar stuff today, I decided to give up and use my computer for some playing. I wanted to play some oldie, so I reinstalled Master of Orion 2. A few turns into the game, I read into the turn summary:
Citizens demand a stadium. (There is no stadium building in MOO2, so I was puzzled). And more cream of celery soup. I stared for a while at the screen, and then laughed.
Still unsure if this was some 4/1 joke, I checked google and found a page saying that there's actually that easter egg in the game that shows that message.
That was the only thing today that left me with the jaw open. I hope there are still some places where I will be off guard on next April Fools... Slashdot hasn't one of them for a long while.
Bye Slashdot (Score:2, Redundant)
APRIL FOOLS (Score:2)
No one cares. (Score:3, Interesting)
Let's be honest - this is a website for people that are wasting time - either by not studying, or by not working. It has semi-interesting articles, but it is most definitely not NPR, the Washington Post, or CNN. It's a geek site, run by a few guys who thought it would be a cool idea. I don't even understand why they stick around (CmdrTaco and Hemos) because quite frankly, I would think that they'd be tired of all the flames they get day in and day out. Do you get as attacked at your job as they do everyday?
If you don't like the site - don't come to the site. If you don't like the site on AFD, don't come to the site on AFD. It's one day. (Ok, kindof two days, but there are now legit articles up, so I'm still going to count it as just one day.)
And furthermore (as I stand a little straighter on my soap box) I don't understand all of the flames about spell checking stories and whatnot. It's not like Taco was a BETTER speller 3 years ago! Nothing has changed. If you didn't like it then, you shouldn't have set up camp in the first place. It hardly makes sense to flame away for flaws that have been here since the beginning.
I know I may well pay painfully for this post, but so be it.
No Sense of Humor (Score:4, Insightful)
In future news... (Score:2, Funny)
On 1 April 2004, Kathleen Malda receives letter from the Holland, Michigan, "divorce court". The letter, however, is completely blank, except for a single line:
April Fools! Get it? GET IT???
On 2 April 2004, Rob Malda receives a letter from the same court. The letter is not blank, however...
Rob, things are funny only up to a certain point. I hope you've been reading the comments.
So the joke's on us? (Score:5, Insightful)
Ohhhh, I see. You posted one April Fool's story after another, abondaoning all subtlety and thus destroying all the humor intentionally? You did it just so you could sit back and watch people flame you?
Internet culture has a word for people like you. The word is "troll."
TheFrood
Re:So the joke's on us? (Score:3, Funny)
A bit of an oxymoron, isn't it?
Re:So the joke's on us? (Score:2)
In Charge.
The problem with today's theme... (Score:4, Interesting)
Changes to the RFC in order to be international (Score:3, Funny)
Moderator points (Score:2, Insightful)
Ralph
Dear US: Look up "The Rest of the World" (Score:3, Interesting)
- 13 Updated Slashdot Advertising Policy by CmdrTaco with 320 comments on Tue April 02, 0:13
For anyone ahead the US AF "pranks" clog up everything for about 48 hours starting from our April 1st.Seriously, limit next year's AF coverage to one internal /. admin related post plus a "Quickies" that reports on other pranks. Having a homepage full of stupid lies does not a happy surfer make.
Oh, yeah, much of the rest of the world doesn't "get" Halloween either, but at least the Simpsons Halloween specials are actually funny. Even if they are played around xmas.
Best April Fool's Joke (Score:2)
No wait, that wasn't today...
An April Fool's Birthday (Score:2)
Don't worry, I'm not going to get all corny and weepy. Yeah, the guy really was born on April 1st. If you met him, you'd know how well it fits. Happy Birthday, Kurt!
<rant>
For the groaners: waah. Slashdot isn't Democracy Now [democracynow.com], The Progressive [progressive.org], and sure the hell isn't CNN [cnn.com], NPR [npr.org], MSNBC [msnbc.com] or whatever "hard news" site you've been looking for. It's a pretty cool blog - it keeps me (and you) coming back.
</rant>
Anyway, at least there's one day a year everyone can act a fool - even better if it's your birthday!
As for the other 364 days...
Kinda slow this year (Score:2)
bah. Just more whiners this year.
The net was actualy pretty slow for april fools stuff, and A LOT of it has come down early (excuse me folks, uh, 4 hours to go. . . . at least here on the west coast). Last year was better. ^_^
I liked it because it was different (Score:3, Interesting)
The whole thing was different this year. In the past there have been a few mixed in with the regular news, but today nothing but crap. If the plan is to do this every year then it is the beginning of something lame. If the plan is to do something different each year then the whole thing is the beginning of something interesting to look forward to.
I did wonder about what I was missing when I realized that every story was going to be a joke, but then realized that perhaps I should take a day and just miss out! Probably got more work done today than usual. Hmmm...
My favorite was the change in ad policy. Actually was pissed for a moment until I realized what day it was.
The editors should post a best of the clueless collection for comment. After the load of crap today, I'll bet they have some pretty good and totally useless rants to show off.
One from UIUC (Score:3, Funny)
Date: Mon, 01 Apr 2002 07:36:04 -0600
From: "Dr. Ivana Fukalot, MD Asst Dir.McKinley Health Center"
Subject: MASSMAIL - Emergency Condom Recall
To: postmaster@your.smtp.com
Precedence: list
Reply-To: ivanafuk@uiuc.edu
X-Massmail-Tag: 20020401097950-543798
X-URL: http://www.cso.uiuc.edu/services/massmail/
X-Bul
X-UIDL: j3*#!%g:"![aO"!UHH!!
To all University students:
It has recently come to the attention of the McKinley Health Center
Staff that a recent batch of condoms purchased and already in partial
distribution on campus may be defective. According to Trojan, the
manufacturer of the condoms, several thousand condoms distributed to the
University of Illinois may have inappropriately passed the quality
control tests at their production facility.
The recall affects all Trojan brand condoms of the normal, non-ribbed,
variety. If you have received such condoms from McKinley or the McKinley
Resource Center since February 3rd, you are strongly advised to take the
following actions:
If you have used such condoms there is small probability that
microscopic holes may have prevented the condom from performing
effectively. To determine if your pack of condoms was part of the batch
that inappropriately passed the quality control tests, please take the
following steps immediately:
1.) Remove an unused condom from its wrapper.
2.) Fully unroll and stretch the condom and rotate it looking for the
lot numbers imprinted near the base of the condom.
3.) Alternatively, place your mouth on the condom and gently exhale,
inflating the condom to reveal the lot numbers.
If the beginning of the lot numbers starts with:
31337-H4Ck
you may have a condom from the defective batch.
Trojan has requested that we collect all unused condoms from this batch and
return them immediately for testing and disposal. If you are unsure as
to whether the condom pack you possess is affected or not please follow
the return instructions below.
Drop points have been conventiently setup at McKinley Health center and
the McKinley Resource Center. For your convinience we have also arranged
for the tuition drop boxes both in the Illini Union and the Henry
Administration building to be opened for condom collection.
We deeply regret this incident and we realize this situation may have
many serious implications. If you have any further questions we urge you
to contact the McKinley Health Center.
Sincerely,
Dr. Ivana Fukalot, MD
Asst. Director of McKinley Health Center
This mailing approved by:
The Office of the Vice Chancellor for Student Affairs
--
This message sent via MASSMAIL.
Re:MLK Said it Best: (Score:2)
Re:no, it hasn't been a fun day (Score:5, Funny)
For crying out loud, you people are fucking addicted to this place and all you can do is bitch about it. I like it better when it was just for Malda's personal amusement, I don't give a fuck about the shareholders and he shouldn't either. If he starts running the site with nothing but the shareholders in mind then everything that makes the site worthwhile will vanish. So a hearty FUCKOFF to you, maybe if Malda ignored the shareholders clamoring for money more often we'd go back to getting amusing stories about lego robots dismantling other lego robots with glow in the dark magnetic nerf guns.
Kintanon
Re:no, it hasn't been a fun day (Score:2)
For crying out loud, you people are fucking addicted to this place and all you can do is bitch about it. ...uhmm... that's about all addicts do do aboot it :)
Re:Thank god thats over. (Score:4, Insightful)
Maybe I'm too old to understand (I'm 40, which probably makes me older than 95% of
Of all the sites I consider "news" sites, I noticed that
One was funny. Two was okay. Three was excessive. Ten was totally friggin stupid and a waste of time, and makes me want to re-evaluate my opinion of
And all of them were so lame and obvious that anyone who thought they were real stories should be forced to turn in their geek club decoder rings and go away.
Re:Thank god thats over. (Score:2)
Hear hear! April Fool's are "Funny Once" (Score:2)
Funny-once jokes: Tell it once, you're a wit. Tell it twice and you're a half-wit.
Smith responds: "Geometric series?"
Today's Slashdot seems to support Smith's Conjecture.
Re:CmdrTaco (Score:4, Funny)
Re:CmdrTaco (Score:2)
I just said he was: a) unfunny, and b) self-righteous for complaining about the complainers.
If one agrees with the Taco, she is cool. If one disagrees, she is clueless?
So be it. It's his place.
Or is it?
Re:Any GOOD jokes out there today? (Score:2)
Re:CmdrTaco, you idiot, you're missing the point! (Score:3, Insightful)
Taco, Hemos and Neal were laughing at you and the folks like you who got so pissy about this whole thing.
The joke wasn't the stories - it was the comments to the stories! You were the April Fool's Day joke!
It's akin to Beavis and Butthead. The show wasn't all that funny, but the people who reacted, positively or negatively, to it were hilarious!