What would you like the CIA to declassify?
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Aliens (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Funny)
I think Monty Python said it best:
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere out in space,
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth!
It's the hope that there is a world out there that it just a bit less fucked up than this one, that keeps me (somewhat) sane, and let's me drift off in to a Kilkenny fueled coma each night.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JSR_6qfXTg [youtube.com] if you don't where it's from.
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Interesting)
Think about it. If a society exists that can travel light years, they probably have the technology for fusion power (or better). They probably do not rely on fossil fuels anymore. They probably screwed up their planet in the past worse than even ourselves (yet). But they must have learnt from the past errors and moved forward.
The question is whether we can do the same. And no, aliens will not help us just like you (if you are sane) would not interfere with some ant colony.
Furthermore, no normal alien species is going to contact us at our current stage of development. While scientists and some educated people would view this in a positive manner, the vast majority would freak out. Think about the nuts that still believe Earth is created by God and humans are not animals and made in God's image. These (the vast majority of Earth's population!) could not handle that there is,
1. other life in the universe, and
2. other life in the universe that is superior to them.
Their entire belief is from the Bible or Quaran or whatever that dictates that humans are special. And life is special.
We are too arrogant of ourselves to have contact result in something positive. At least on the global scale. Maybe in 2-3 hundred years. Maybe.
Even in the movie Contact, the first retarded question by one of the contenders to use the machine was "Do you believe in God?". I mean, WTF? It is like asking modern man "Do you believe in Apollo or Aphrodite?". Completely out of place. Everyone knows the proper question is "Thanks for contacting us, but why did you initiate the contact? Why now?" and then "Can we be friends?" if the first is ok.
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Insightful)
Have you been spending way too much time hitting the crack pipe? I think so.
You might notice that in the middle east where society is screwed up, it's related to a *resurgence* in religion. You might also notice that in the US, where not only is society at a relative low, but our government is at its most corrupt. Both of those facts are due to an upswing in religion and especially on voting based on religion. In fact, America is currently at an unprecedented high of religious belief.
So, sorry, but once again religion is the problem, not the solution.
As far as turning away from god, your entirely dishonest statement is really sickening.
The fundamental difference that set America apart and made it a beacon of liberty for so long was the complete and utter rejection of the idea that religion could be allowed a role in the government of a free society. That's a huge part of why we did so well. The increasing rejection of that idea fostered by religious extremists, like yourself, is far more of a problem then what you said. Of course, that would still be true even if what you had said wasn't a blatant, obvious lie.
A fundamental component of religion - whether Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Hindu, Buddhishm, Wicca, or whatever is that there is something bigger than you. When people start to think "There's nothing bigger than me" things start to turn to crap.
Hardly. It's when people start thinking that their imaginary friend should be allowed power of life and death over others based on ancient fairy tales that things get really fucking dark and bloody if the entirety of human history is any guide.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
So that's where all those softwae bugs come from - faith-based computing.
How come nobody's come out with a line of computer books for BAGs (born-again xians)?
Re:Maybe the Galaxy is Ours? (Score:4, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Cheers.
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Ummm, no it doesn't. There have been 6.99 billion candidate years for the 10 million year clock to start (you don't have to wait for the next 10 million years if your warp drive wasn't ready when this 10 million year time span started). So there's roughly a 1/6990000000 chance that the other civilization is just now in the process
Re:Aliens (Score:4, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Sarah Jessica Parker: Alien or Horse? (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:2, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Interesting)
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Perhaps. But if she actually strode into your baseme^H^H^H^H^H^Hoffice right now, and asked if you would like to "go some place a little more intimate", and held out her hand to you, you would trip over yourself leaping out of your chair.
Oh, for the ability to HTML link in that great image f
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Funny)
If it is decided she is an alien and not a horse...there's a difference between freaky and creepy...
Nailing an alien chick would also give you some geek cred. Hard to "spin" doing a horse...
Re:Aliens (Score:5, Insightful)
"I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you're out there and you're cute, maybe you're beautiful, I just to tell you something - there's more of us ugly motherfuckers than you are, hey-y, so watch out now..."
- Frank Zappa, American Composer (1940-1993)
It's not about men (Score:5, Insightful)
SJP plays a character that is portrayed (for women) as the ideal woman. She is well-dressed, empowered, all the men on the screen seem to be attracted to her, and yet she is still as sentimental (or rather her characters appear to be) as women think they are. They empathize. They want to have the life SJP seems to have on TV. And thus, they buy the products when SJP endorses them.
Women think she's beautiful, and that's all that matters to the cosmetic industry. And to get women to think she's beautiful, all they have to do is show men swooning over her on the screen. Sort of like men and hair products/big muscles. Most women I've dated dislike big muscles intensely and are rather attracted to balding or graying men (since women are often attracted to men older than they are). But show men a few ads in which the young, cut stud with the great hair gets the bikini babe and half the guys on the block are running out to buy a Bowflex and some Rogaine.
Women spokesmodels sell to women; men spokesmodels sell to men. It's always been that way.
Re:It's not about men (Score:5, Interesting)
Re: (Score:2)
As for me... (Score:5, Funny)
No wonder the CIA gets away with murder (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:No wonder the CIA gets away with murder (Score:5, Insightful)
What really happens during the CIA extra-ordinary rendition flights?
Maybe we'll find out in 50 years and we'll all have a laugh about the crazy things that happened back in the early 2000's.
Re: NSA (Score:5, Informative)
Anyone who has read James Bamford [wikipedia.org] knows that the NSA is where the real secrets are. Body of Secrets is, as far as I know, the only published work on the NSA to be confirmed as true by the agency itself. An agency that until recently denied it's own existence.
(And anyone who has read about Operation Northwoods [wikipedia.org] and still believes that the United States would never harm it's own citizens is deluding themselves.)
Re: NSA (Score:5, Informative)
Re: NSA (Score:4, Funny)
Re:No wonder the CIA gets away with murder (Score:4, Insightful)
The reason the American people focus on ridiculous conspiracies when real conspiracies are being waged against the Constitution (see:"Dick Cheney"), is the same reason such a high percentage of Americans will say they believe in God. Because faith in God and silly consipiracies gives you a safe harbor of belief that no amount of reason or rationale can touch. It's just as impossible to convince someone that the Illuminati don't run things (their control is so total that they can hide their own existence) than it is to convince them there's no God (he's all-powerful, so he fixed everything to make it look like he didn't really create the universe in 6 days, such as seeding the crust with phoney fossils, etc.). It makes people feel good to turn their backs on reality and hang on to a comfortable fantasy.
But it's worth remembering that the number of Americans who believe there are extraterrestrials is almost as big as the number who claim to believe in an all-powerful God who is in charge of the universe.
Re:No wonder the CIA gets away with murder (Score:4, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
This poll may be humor, but it is at least part irony. I suspect some of the voters are actually sincere. And coming on the heels of polls that indicate 4 in 10 Americans think Saddam had something to with 9/11 after all the info that has come out!
I have every reason to see this poll as less than "ha ha" funny.
Maybe a 2-for-1 deal? (Score:5, Funny)
Kennedy assassination (Score:5, Funny)
After watching the "Special Edition" of the Zapruder film, it's clear that JFK shot first.
Re: (Score:2)
As a side note, CowboyNeal can be seen standing on the grassy knoll, but it's a walkie talkie that he's holding, not a gun. That should quell the conspiracy theorists, unless they're so paranoid they claim the film was somehow "digitally altered".
Re: (Score:2)
NEWMAN: Well that's the way it happened.
JERRY: What happened to your head when you got hit?
KRAMER: Well. uh, well my head went back and to the left
JERRY: Again
KRAMER: Back and to the left
JERRY: Back and to the left. Back and to the left.
ELAINE: So, what are you saying?
JERRY: I am saying that the spit could not have come from behind
Redundant option (Score:5, Funny)
We already know who shot Kennedy.
Heck, we know who killed both Kennedys.
It was the devil and some other guy:
I shouted out: 'Who killed the Kennedys
When after all, it was you and me'
Re: (Score:2)
Ask the CIA (Score:3, Funny)
why bother asking? (Score:5, Interesting)
Do they know who shot Kennedy? Do we want the truth about aliens? How about trying to live with the idea that they don't know who shot the president, and they have had no contact with aliens?
This reminds me of Mulder's poster - "I want to believe"... But I realize that a better idea is to invest in research, rather than investing in hopes someone would do the research for us or will automagically provide all the answers to all the questions.
Had there been any fruitful contacts with aliens, the state would probably use the obtained data to gain a strategical advantage. Since the USA doesn't seem to be that much different (technologically) from other industrialized states (such as Japan, for example), perhaps there were no contacts? or there were no useful contacts (hence there is nothing worth our time)?
Finally, there are a few missing options:
- is there god?
- who was behind 9/11?
- were they on the moon?
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Re:why bother asking? (Score:5, Insightful)
I used to work at the VA hospital and talked with a Korean War era Vet who insisted he had been a security guard at Groom Lake and he "knew" that all of our processor technology actually came from the ship that crashed at Roswell. They already have the schematics for the Intel XXX, but they are slowly releasing the technology to make it appear natural.
I happen to think its all crap. Not because I dont think it could happen, but because I dont believe you can keep a secret that size when you have so many people who would have to know about it.
Re:why bother asking? (Score:4, Interesting)
From Valerie Plame, to warrantless wiretapping, to covert action against Iran, etc etc...
then agai, who knows how much of that stuff is real, and how much disinformation >:-)
I basically feel like I do about the 9/11 crazies... To execute a controlled demolition of WTC, how many people would have to be moving equipment around? Tens? Hundreds? Only ONE person would need to feel guilty about it, or only ONE person would need to see them doing something for the truth to come out.. secrets are hard to keep!
How can The Truth About Aliens be winning? (Score:5, Insightful)
Re: (Score:2)
Sheesh.
Oh well, I suppose tongue-in-cheek poll qestions draw out the literalists.
Re: (Score:2)
Answer me that, Mr. Smartypants.
Re:How can The Truth About Aliens be winning? (Score:4, Funny)
"There aren't any aliens."
Who the #%@& keeps anal probing me then?
Re:How can The Truth About Aliens be winning? (Score:5, Funny)
Aliens or Extraterrestrials ? (Score:2)
Extraterrestrials would have been a better choice of names.
Reading comprehension much? (Score:4, Insightful)
Aliens who enter the US through swimming across the Rio Grand, without visas, passports, et cetera, are, fact, breaking US law by doing so - thus, they are 'illegal' aliens.
I can see the confusion - after all, there are no 'legal' and 'illegal' bank robbers. However, the alien here is referring not so much to the person, but to their status. Think, 'legal distillery' vs. 'illegal distillery'.
Of course, I'm sure this is a two-bit troll, so I'll just suggest we agree to disagree on legal vs. illegal aliens, and call 'em what they are:
Criminals who are breaking the law.
Re:Reading comprehension much? (Score:4, Insightful)
If I may, I'll take your proposal a step further, let's call them people who steal the jobs of one-bit AC's, racists and nationalists. I happily cheer them on.
Not CIA's information to classify! (Score:2)
Re:Not CIA's information to classify! (Score:5, Informative)
Most of this isn't CIA responsibility. The CIA likely has no knowlege of quite a number of these projects - that are military, not CIA. For instance, the CIA does not develop aircraft or weapons.
That's not necessarily the case. The U2 spy plane was originally operated by the CIA, and the SR-71 began as a CIA project until the Air Force decided it had potential as a super-fast nuclear bomber. If Aurora exists, they would certainly be deeply involved in it.
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
missing option; (Score:5, Insightful)
Hmmm... How about... (Score:4, Insightful)
Vote for Weather Control (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:2)
Toss up between Kennedy and Aurora (Score:5, Interesting)
The Philadelphia experiment was a test of either a radar type system, or a radar blocking system for ships. It was source material for some science fiction authors later, which many conspiracy nuts can't tell from reality. Explains a lot about why Scientology continues to pick up new recruits.
Water powered engines tend to be debunked by anyone with more than a minimal knowledge of chemistry. Acetone and water can run an engine for a few minutes, if you don't plan on ever using the engine again.
The New World Order? Ha! Ask anyone who has ever worked in an international organisation, like the UN, the World Bank, or UNESCO, and you will lose faith they could get anything done. They generally have two operating modes, Incompetent, and Maliciously Incompetent.
Weather control and aliens are the realm of late night talk shows fed by gullible people who will believe anything if it sounds authoritative enough. Many bullshitters have gotten rich by working the gullibility factor.
But the real two classified systems are certainly interesting. First is the purportedly named Aurora project. I've seen donuts-on-a-rope contrails over Europe in predawn light, no published propulsion system makes that distinct a trail, but there is certainly some research project into perhaps a halfway breakthrough to scramjet technology. One day, maybe soon, the U.S. will make the first public appearance of some super-fast or high flying jet, just as they did with the F-117 a couple decades ago. I'd expect just after that, some American aviation firm will show off their prototype commercial "super-concorde" plane, to be released in a few years as a way to get from NY to London in two hours.
The Kennedy assassination, however, is where the most juicy story lies. The Warren Commission is still mostly classified, and the CIA were known to have completed their own investigation, often stepping all over the toes of the FBI agents in doing so. If the assassination wasn't a CIA backed operation, it would be interesting to see what other links they posited from their large body of secretive intelligence work.
Me, I'm a classicist. I'm still researching what happened to Adam Weishaupt around the time George Washington went from being a 6'2" lanky redhead to a 5'5" stocky grey haired man at his inauguration.
the AC
Re: (Score:2)
Re:Toss up between Kennedy and Aurora (Score:5, Interesting)
There are some nuts out there talking about cloaking and time travel, etc, and I understand the mania that has been fueled by that, but it makes me no less interested in hearing an official account that explains (or explains away) some of the odd eyewitness accounts of that experiment.
Forgotten CIA Documents: MKULTRA (Score:2)
That reminds me. Some leaked CIA reports mention this project called MKULTRA [wikipedia.org], which, according to reporter Pepe Rodriguez [pepe-rodriguez.com] (cults expert) was behind the cults founded by Jim Jones and David Koresh. There's lots of bibliography [google.com] (true? false? rumours?) on the web about this relationship.
Creepy stuff.
Re: (Score:2)
And this differs from any other governmental or quasi-governmental organization how?
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
aliens are the realm of late night talk shows fed by gullible people who will believe anything if it sounds authoritative enough.
That may be true, but I don't see that being a particularly good scientific argument one way or the other. I voted for aliens because:
Re:Toss up between Kennedy and Aurora (Score:4, Interesting)
I actually don't like to make such bold assumptions about how aliens would think. It's a pet peeve of mine that self-professed scientific thinkers will go on and on about how alien biology and anatomy is almost certain to be completely unlike our own, and yet will implicitly assume that alien psychology must be the same as ours. Heck, I don't understand how women think, and we're the same species, so why should I imagine that I or any one else can understand alien thought processes with any confidence?
That said, yes the above is possible. And it's also possible that they want us to know but aren't about to tell us. And it's also possible that they already did tell us, and that whomever they told (be it the leader of the largest superpower or some guy in a corn field) went and told them that it would be better for all concerened if they kept themselves hidden.
That is another possibility, absolutely. It is also possible that they don't care if we detect them or not. It is also possible that they have seen how our scientists are so intensely disinclined to believe in alien visitors, and so quick to ignore or discredit out of hand any evidence that might arise, that the aliens know they don't need to take any specials measures to avoid official detection.
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
1. Tell that to NASA [amazon.com] which examines NASA's own footage.
2a) Compare the original photo that the
http://www.theyfly.com/images2/f0494.jpg [theyfly.com]
2b)
http://www.gaiaguys.net/X-FILES.htm [gaiaguys.net]
Too many people's belief systems and religious systems would to
Kennedy... (Score:5, Informative)
Aurora is the NRO/Air Force.
Aliens would be the Army/Air Force/NSA/Unknown Agency.
The water powered engine would be the USPTO/DOE.
The Philadelphia Experiment was the Navy/DOD/DARPA.
Weather Control Devices would be the NOAA/NASA/NSA/Unknown Agency.
New World Order would be Bildebergers/CFR/T-L Committee/NSA/Unknown Agency/Freemasons/Knights Templar/Priory of Scion/Pope/Etc...
So, the CIA is only linked in any way (via conspiracy theories, mostly) to the Kennedy Assassinations (both Bobby Kennedy and JFK.)
Re: (Score:2)
Re:Kennedy... (Score:5, Funny)
Now, throw in the obligitory Simpson's quotes...
Honestly, (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:Honestly, (Score:5, Insightful)
No government allows everyone to gain access to every document without security clearance and knowledge. Without security clearance with different high-end levels of classification, you have no security at all.
How would uncovering any of these incidents make your life better? Half of the people involved in these, are already dead. It would only fuel more finger pointing and political babble that was buried years ago. Lord knows we don't need any more of that.
As we stand, if an asteroid fell in the middle east right now.. everyone across the world would say the US somehow put it on course; that it wasn't a meteor and it was a bomb; that George Bush masterminded it (but he's stupid MOST of the time) along with other misconceptions that veer away from the truth.
I'm not flaming you, but even if the truth was uncovered about all this shit, I'm quite certain that nobody would be happy with the results and nobody would believe it. They could be handed the documents they want to see, and if it didn't have some fucked up conspiracy... they would be thought of as "fake".
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Because people matter. I have a cousin who is a zombie now, he worked in nuclear research in Idaho for the government. Will we know what happened to him? No. The bearing this type of sitation holds to the argument is minimal, there are doubtless others. If the government's secrets can't be unearthed in 45 years (or some reasonable number) then perhaps the government should take a closer look at what it is doing. Every 'modern' government exists to serve the people, not to serve itself or merely a porti
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
I think that uncovering some of the hidden "secrets" would in-turn cause a collapse, as you call it. There are secrets right now, dealing with terrorism and security that would, no doubt, cause a civil war within certain societies within the states.
The reason that the secrets need to come out is because they are rotting our country from the inside. There are many people that are convinced our country is moving toward a police state / totalitarian society. Bush and Cheney having essentially declared themselves above the law sure isn't helping matters.
Think of it like a house suffering from a termite infestation -- sure it might not be the easiest thing to cure it, but if you just let it go on unchecked, the house will collapse eventually anyway.
Open
Re:Honestly, (Score:4, Interesting)
I think that the knowledge that today's secrets will likely be revealed in 45 years can affect the behavior of spy organizations today. That's the important thing.
Security through obfuscation (Score:3, Insightful)
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Already in place: EO 13292, section 3.3 - Automatic Declassification [wikisource.org]
There are specific exemptions (for example, things that'd put curren
Let them eat yellowcake (Score:2, Insightful)
Reasons why Aliens is the best choice (Score:2, Funny)
2. The aliens had nothing to do with 9/11 - that was the US government that did that.
3. I for one would like not to have to pretend I'm human.
How about they tell us... (Score:3, Funny)
I voted for Alien but check this out (Score:2, Informative)
Shh! Secret! (Score:5, Funny)
As to who shot Kennedy, pfft. It was Sumdood [blogspot.com]
New World Order, of course... (Score:5, Funny)
1) Who really shot Kennedy (to keep him from ratting them out)
2) Any proof on the existence of aliens (because the New World Order is using superior alien technology to maintain their grip)
3) The water-powered-engine, because the New World Order is in bed with Big Oil, and they prevented a water-powered engine from coming to market. They also suppressed a cel-phone that runs on air and a washing machine that is powered by sand. They also make me wear socks.
The rest I don't care about.
Re:New World Order, of course... (Score:5, Insightful)
Ha! They are doing it with nothing more than television and ink on pressed wooden pulp!
Re:New World Order, of course... (Score:4, Insightful)
MK ULTRA (Score:4, Interesting)
You can't release one without the others (Score:5, Funny)
Oh, I see, you think I almost got all of them, but missed Cowboy Neal? Who do you think was the actual shooter riding in that plane?
There is only one thing I want to know (Score:5, Funny)
Ugh! (Score:3, Interesting)
What is happening in the world of espionage RIGHT NOW?
You know? The thing we're all gleefully ignoring while pondering this stupidity.
Article [worldtribune.com]
Israel just announced that they expect to be attacked during July by five different enemies. --Which likely means they're going to get all pre-emptive about it. --Which likely means that before they can pull that rat out of the bag, they need the world to be distracted and angry at the Arab nations. Which likely means we're due for another towering inferno with airplanes or something on home soil.
I hope I'm dead wrong, but the indicators are beginning to point with increasing intensity toward some serious shit. I hope it's just dumb FUD and I hope it goes away, but I've been feeling really goosebumpy for the last couple of days.
-FL
Project StarGate is missing :-/ (Score:5, Funny)
Project StarGate, the only project we actually KNOW exists (from all the documentary films) is missing from the list of choices!
While Project StarGate is an airforce operation, clearly the CIA would have knowledge about it.
Is Slashdot helping the CIA keeping the project secret???
Seriously. (Score:3, Interesting)
Just curious, I'm still in love with the constitution. Call me a terrorist.
Alien Life forms (Score:3, Funny)
The truth is out there, way out there (Score:5, Insightful)
They work cheaper than Americans and have less rights. When it comes to slavery, brown is the new black.
Who shot Kennedy
This question has been posed previously for both Kennedy brothers. Answer: it was you and me.
The water powered engine
That's easy. You just need to mix the water with Mountain Dew syrup and C02, coders will work for days.
The Philadelphia experiment
Tried making cheesesteak with feta. Conclusion: feta works on gyros, not cheeseteaks.
The Aurora project
Money was earmarked for hypersonic spyplane but was misappropriated for wild weekend in Vegas. The coverup is all about keeping Congress from finding out. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
Weather control devices
it's a female conspiracy. They're always complaining about it being too damned cold so they turned the thermostat up on the entire planet. The only hope is to wait for menopause and the hot flashes, then they'll turn it down again.
The New World Order
Meet the New World Order, same as the Old World Order, got fooled again.
CowboyNeal's free energy machine
It's called crashing on the couches of friends and not pitching in for food. Beware, Cowboy, I think they're starting to see through the deception.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Favorite Pony:
Keg
Up
Shetland
OMG
My Little
pwnd
express
Pony Trainer Neal
Re:Gah (Score:5, Informative)
That's the beauty of conspiracy theories (Score:2)
No matter how much the CIA releases, there will always be people who believe that there is still more info out there that will prove their point.
Spot on. The great thing about conspiracy theories is that they're immune to elimination. No amount of factual proof is enough to be dispositive, because there's always one more piece of the jigsaw puzzle that doesn't fit. Life isn't neat and tidy, which plays right into the hands of the conspiracy-minded.
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Seems the Secret Service is the only force that actually does its job quietly without being a loud mouth.
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Re: (Score:3, Insightful)