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Microsoft to Spy on Employees
Posted by
CmdrTaco
on Wed Jan 16, 2008 09:33 AM
from the do-you-see-what-i-see dept.
from the do-you-see-what-i-see dept.
4T writes "Forget about monitoring your computers with spyware, now they're going to monitor the users as well!
'Microsoft is developing Big Brother-style software capable of remotely monitoring a worker's productivity, physical wellbeing and competence.
The Times has seen a patent application filed by the company for a computer system that links workers to their computers via wireless sensors that measure their metabolism. The system would allow managers to monitor employees' performance by measuring their heart rate, body temperature, movement, facial expression and blood pressure. Unions said they fear that employees could be dismissed on the basis of a computer's assessment of their physiological state.'"
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Submission: Microsoft to spy on employees by Anonymous Coward
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here's a screenshot (Score:5, Funny)
anything like this?
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Ahhh, you mean involving a ribbon, which you could use to hang yourself?
Actually, Office 97 (Score:4, Funny)
Would you like help?
* Get help with killing yourself.
* Just kill yourself without help.
O Show me this tip every time I start to show signs of optimism.
Parent
Re:here's a screenshot (Score:5, Funny)
How many edges on a nitrogon?
-:sigma.SB
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re:No one offers assistance like microsoft (Score:5, Informative)
You say:
"Everyone here trying to apply it to a regular 9 to 5 job setting is obviously going to get the wrong idea."
But then the article goes on (paragraph 3):
Technology allowing constant monitoring of workers was previously limited to pilots, firefighters and Nasa astronauts. This is believed to be the first time a company has proposed developing such software for mainstream workplaces.
we are getting just the right idea... of what kind of a hellish place this kind of system would produce.
Parent
Wait a second (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:Wait a second (Score:5, Insightful)
But I like to believe that we might yet hold on to some Constitutional rights that would really put a damper on this thing.
Parent
Re:Wait a second (Score:5, Funny)
Time to make outsourcing work for us!
Parent
Re:Wait a second (Score:5, Insightful)
Don't get your hopes up. They'll use the same argument they used for workplace drug testing, i.e: If you don't like it, go work somewhere else.
If they can demand my urine and credit score, why not my heart rate?
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:Wait a second (Score:5, Insightful)
What I do in my spare time outside the office has absolutely no bearing on my job until it effects the productivity of work. Drug tests are an indirect measure of productivity, using the assumption that "drugs == bad worker". I disagree with that logic, and think that drug tests should only be administered if the worker's performance is clearly impacted. If there's no performance impact, then what the hell does the company care what I do outside work? (I know that's not the attitude many companies have, but it's the attitude I have.)
A credit score is a little more of a stretch, but using the logic "bad credit == deadbeat", it could be a stand-in for proper hiring practices.
However, this software will eliminate both of those indirect methods of measuring productivity because it will be able to directly measure it. And productivity, after all, is what the company ultimately cares about.
I don't agree with using this technology, but that's the rationale companies will use.
Parent
Re:Wait a second (Score:4, Informative)
We cannot agree on the colour of shit never mind getting something like this to work
Most of the time our employees are STUDENTS and our employee churn is so fast that we have a revolving door.
MSFT's employee ID's are near half a million, they are UNIQUE per employee in their entire LIFETIME. THat is how many employee's they have been through in the past 5 years (back then it was in the low hundred thousands).
Parent
Re:Wait a second (Score:5, Insightful)
Because they threaten you into compliance by threatening your livelihood and not everybody has the option of switching jobs?
Hell, short of threats of physical violence, I'm hard pressed to think of a nastier thing to do to someone then threaten their livelihood.
Parent
Re:Wait a second (Score:4, Insightful)
So, a patent was filed for a system that could be used to assess the physiological state of employees in order to measure performance. Right. So, who would be the target audience? Financial firms? I don't think so. On the other hand, deep sea divers would benefit from such measures. These are people who get paid an astronomical amount of money to do incredibly dangerous work. If their jobs could be made slightly safer, it would be a huge win, and well worth a large expense.
What about professional athletes? Is player number 73 about to collapse from the strain? Is he too hung over to play? Pay someone six or seven figures for their physical performance and you care about that sort of thing.
Everyone instead leaps to, "my manager is going to be putting my heartrate on my review!"
Sigh.
Parent
Re:Wait a second (Score:5, Informative)
Maybe you should RTFA? They aren't aiming this at sports figures and deep sea divers. To quote:
Technology allowing constant monitoring of workers was previously limited to pilots, firefighters and Nasa astronauts. This is believed to be the first time a company has proposed developing such software for mainstream workplaces.
Another interesting quote:
The system could also "automatically detect frustration or stress in the user" and "offer and provide assistance accordingly".
Great! I can just see it now. Clippy pops up on my screen: "It looks like you are extremely frustrated with your current job? Would you like my assistance in composing your resume?"
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
This is a patent application. (I love how the Times acts like it's some secret document they've obtained!) No patent attorney in his right mind drafts an application that says "This would be useful for X and Y, but we're sure not claiming any applicability to A, B and C!"
Anyway, let's wait five years and see whether Microsoft workers are, in fact, hooked up to heart monitors. You can bet on the evil of M$$$$, I'll bet on j
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Yes, because the random drug testing, use of credit reports, and monitoring of activities outside of the workplace isn't enough. My boss should get an automated message if some line of code deems that I'm "frustrated" because my keystroke pattern changes.
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
It looks like your heart rate has dropped below 200 bpm.
Would you like some more coffee?
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Of course this might also work for that woman who said "help, I've fallen and can't get up" and others like that. I'm sure that if this is not already in use in Japan, it soon will be. They are doing a lot to assist their aging population.
OTOH, if you are required to be monitored to get behind the wheel of your car, that could
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Wait a second - with exceptions (Score:3, Funny)
Filing a patent doesn't mean a lot these days.. (Score:5, Insightful)
Well, i'm off to use my iPatriot computer and drive my Patriot Chevy to the Patriot Meeting this afternoon. Come to think of it, thats probably why New England is winning so much, everyone else just needs to put Patriot in their team name!
Re:Filing a patent doesn't mean a lot these days.. (Score:4, Interesting)
Parent
= tobacco companies studies of smoking? (Score:5, Interesting)
Check on metabolism could be useful (Score:5, Funny)
Don't sweat it (Score:4, Funny)
Snow Crash and YT's mom (Score:5, Interesting)
Thoughtcrime IS death... (Score:5, Interesting)
Hmmmm.
Reminds me of some bloke I heard about once. Winston, I think his name was. Got fed information about something he shouldn't have known about at work, so his employer tested him out by slipping him a photo showing a meeting that should never have taken place. Winston reacted with instinct instead of controlling his emotions, which were observed... which eventually led to his incarceration, torture, and psychological breaking. Once that had happened, he was done in.
Funny story. Maybe someone should write a book about it. Or make a film.
Wireless body sensors? (Score:3, Funny)
I am tired of the whole Western world... (Score:4, Funny)
*yank*
Taylorism all over again (Score:3, Insightful)
An average day at Microsoft... (Score:4, Funny)
Monitor1: User death imminent.
Monitor2: OK, notify MicroMorgue to fire up the incinerator, and dispatch two lawyers to deal with the family members. Send the wife a complimentary vista discount cupon.
Monitor1: Wait, he moved...
Monitor2: HOLD, ignore that MicroMorgue order and get the lawyers back to the Antitrust dep. again.
Monitor1: Hes fine, great. Another buck saved, however Thompson in dep. 2 doesnt look entirely healthy.
Monitor2: Inject 1500 MG of Vitamin-C in Subject 7271 Sector 1G, cubicle 1235.
Security-Central: Injecting vitamin-C now, #1000001, (Blue Screen of Death)
Monitor2: What the He..?
Monitor1: Cr*p! The d*mn machine broke down during the vitamin-c injection.
Monitor2: Uh, oh.... Thomson is running around naked, and thats no joystick...
Monitor1: Run the backup servers and have him injected with 15 mg SleepWell 2000.
Monitor2: The backup servers are runnin Linux...
Monitor1: Were screwed!
They can have my vital signs ... (Score:4, Funny)
Oh wait
Before jumping to conclusions... (Score:3, Interesting)
You can leap to your paranoid conclusions based on nearly nothing, but I am going to go with the more reasonable, intelligent, thoughtful assumption that it is actually software to allow hospitals to more cheaply monitor patients using a PC-based solution--until I hear otherwise, of course. (Though I do think it reflects VERY poorly on most of you that you so willingly swallow whatever line the media feeds you.)
Response from Google and Open Source community (Score:3, Insightful)
1. Dr Chaplin, Charles, Modern Times, 1932. 2. Mr Orwell, George, 1984, 1948.
Potential for abuse (Score:3, Funny)
The difference between Google and Microsoft (Score:4, Insightful)
employment != ownership (Score:5, Insightful)
My employer is quite right to monitor and judge the output and quality of my work, and when applicable to monitor how I effect the public image of the company and the work environment for my fellow employees. None of that includes my heart rate or my general state of health. I'm already being forced to contend with a nanny government, I don't need a nanny work environment as well.
Obligatory quote... (Score:4, Informative)
- Uh, Thirteen. This is Houston. Jim, we just had a drop out
on your biomed sensors?
JIM LOVELL
- I'm not wearing my biomed sensors, Houston.
CAPCOM - GOLD
- Okay, Jim. Copy that.
DR. CHUCK (FLIGHT SURGEON)
- Flight. Now I'm losing all three of them!
GENE KRANTZ (FLIGHT DIRECTOR - WHITE)
- It's just a little medical mutiny, Doc I'm sure the guys
are still with us. Let's cut 'em some slack, okay?
Are managers, CEOs, "mainstream employees..." (Score:4, Interesting)
After all, "stress and frustration" have more serious consequences if they lead to bad decision-making.
How about generals? How about the Commander-in-Chief? Isn't their "productivity, physical wellbeing and competence" important?
Why do I somehow think that it is not going to be installed on any management machines... and that the stated rationales are pretexts?
What's the Baseline? (Score:4, Interesting)
When my heart rate is elevated due to office stress, it might jump into the 60s. This is going to screw with your readings.
Furthermore, isn't this more-or-less just a wireless polygraph where you're looking at data without asking questions? Where the hell is the accuracy in that?
I'd love to see the correlation... (Score:3, Insightful)
I am sure you can match biometric data to how many widgets are produced, or even if your driver is likely to be alert (e.g. performing at a higher safety level.) But how can you tell if they are writing good, persuasive prose for that proposal, or cranking out good code or buggy crap that is ultimately negative productivity?
Collect all the data you want, just don't act on that data alone. You will probably find that different people are productive in different ways. One guy might produce 1/5 of his weekly product each day of the week and another might screw around reading Slashdot and watching YouTube, then produce an equal amount of work coding all night a couple of days a week.
I think the utility of such monitoring will depend on the task at hand more than finding "perfectly productive" workers.
Strap them in (Score:3, Funny)
* Special conditions: the employee agrees that any excess electricity generated by the employee in the patented chamber will be available for use by the Company, at no charge.
With Great Power Comes Great Liability (Score:5, Interesting)
Imaginary scenario:
John Smith is sitting at his desk, typing away at the report for tomorrow's deadline. His blood pressure and heart rate spike momentarily, then calm down. His left arm becomes slightly numb, but he thinks nothing of this. About 20 minutes later, he drops dead.
His family turns and sues Megacorp. Megacorp had access to his vital statistics, and should have noticed the warning signs that he was having a heart attack. Had the company acted upon these all-too-obvious signs, it would have saved John's life. The courts rule with Ms. Smith, and award damages of US$40M. Megacorp goes bankrupt.
Reid.out
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:1984 (Score:5, Interesting)
Unfortunately, 80% of the people seem to be unable in seeing subtle nuances. In fact, I doubt that subtlety or nuance is part of their vocabulary.
Of course, there is the 19% that does, but because they are the minority and generally express themselves in a subtle delicate and sophisticated manner, get ignored by the previous 80%.
Leaves us with 1% left. They have read the book and see the projected future as either inevitable or a great opportunity. And figure it is best for 99% of the population if they control this "gradual attrition of human rights via subtle nuances and ideals put in place by the powers that be". Which happens to be them in the first place.
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
From experience, I'd say the only employee feedback that the HR directors understand well is waiting for them in the parking lot with a mask and a baseball bat, preferably with dozen of coworkers so you benefit from the emulation.
Re:Possible Uses (Score:4, Funny)
2. the same, but now you're only allowed to use the phone.
3. monitor keyboard activity. The goal now is to cause the longest possible pause without the subject leaving the cubicle.
Parent