Walmart Tries to Emulate MySpace 345
mattsucks writes to tell us that according to AdAge, retail behemoth WalMart is trying desperately to target the MySpace demographic with a new, and highly sanitized, site designed to appeal to teens. From the article: "It's a quasi-social-networking site for teens designed to allow them to 'express their individuality,' yet it screens all content, tells parents their kids have joined and forbids users to e-mail one another. Oh, and it calls users 'hubsters' -- a twist on hipsters that proves just how painfully uncool it is to try to be cool."
Uh oh (Score:5, Funny)
Just wait for Hub 2.0... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Just wait for Hub 2.0... (Score:4, Informative)
"I represent that my Entry is my original creation and hereby grant to Sponsor the copyright and all other rights now known or hereafter existing to use my Entry throughout the universe, in perpetuity, in whole or in part, in edited, unedited or distorted form, in connection with this Contest, for any trade, advertising, or promotional purpose whatsoever, without review, approval, notification or payment from or to any person or entity, in all media now known or hereafter discovered. I understand and agree that Sponsor shall be entitled to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, license, create derivative works from and distribute or incorporate Entries into any form, medium, or technology now known or later developed throughout the universe, for any purpose whatsoever."
Ouch. (1) Throughout the universe? What, are they afraid a competing alien civilization will try to infringe on the Sponsor's copyright? (2) Without payment, without approval, for any purpose, in any edited or distorted form? Erm.. so if I submitted a video of myself playing guitar, they could make an advertisement where I've been digitally inserted into Britney Spears music video, had a moustache drawn on my face, and use it as an advertisement to sell bull's-eye-targets with my head in the middle? If any kid is hoping to get famous this way, I have one suggestion: DON'T. It sounds like it's *worse* than getting the world's (err, universe's *grin*) worst record deal.
For almost everyone I've met, the ONLY thing they like about Wal-Mart is that you can get lots of stuff inexpensively and conveniently. (I've also heard once or twice that their employees get treated well, which, I have to admit, is admirable.) Their moral agenda, tendency to put local stores out of business (of course, in some cases it's just because it's hard to stay afloat when the giant that is Wal-Mart has sucked all the water out of the pool), policies about what they will and won't carry, and some of the ways I've seen customers treated...
[In some parts of the country, though (sometimes rural areas, economic ditches, etc.), it's the only way to buy some things without mail-ordering them... does that make it a necessary 'evil'?]
Re:Just wait for Hub 2.0... (Score:5, Funny)
Wow. I don't read a lot of these, but is that 'normal' or is Walmart a little optimistic about furture growth?
Re:Just wait for Hub 2.0... (Score:4, Informative)
Re:Uh oh (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:Uh oh (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Uh oh (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:Uh oh (Score:5, Interesting)
I wouldn't say that they're trying to rip off myspace. They're using the idea of MySpace to sell product. This is about marketing back-to-school clothes in an interactive quasi-social way. It's marketing. It's marketing. It's marketing. There is a video contest sponsored by sony. You're supposed to create a video for your page. The video is supposed to be an commercial showing you doing school "your way". That's the marketing slogan: School Your Way.
There is no social interactivity, as near as I can tell. No way to leave comments.
They're not trying to attract the hip kids, so much as they're trying to do a makeover on kids that would normally be shopping for their clothes at walmart. There going after the kids that want to be hip, but aren't. Not ever mall contains a hot topic. This isn't about kids being hip, this is about marketers trying to be hip, tryng to understand the MySpace phenom so they can sell it back to you.
A little Frank Zappa song would be apropos here.
Re:Uh oh (Score:4, Insightful)
I pity the poor kids whose bible-thumping or paranoid parents force them off Myspace and onto this turd. Just keep telling yourself that it will end when you go to college, kids. And, for God's sake, DO NOT let them send you to Liberty University.
-Eric
Re:Uh oh (Score:2)
I believe you but that doesn't mean it's not for other people. Malls connect friends for most teenagers in the US. Walmart connects friends for most reitred people who ride around in winnebegos. It's true, look it up. These old folks park every night in a different walmart parking lot and get together.
For americans shopping is networking. Shopping is also how they define themselves. People (especially teenagers) rely entirely
Re:Uh oh (Score:2)
School My Way (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:Uh oh (Score:4, Funny)
Who told you about the secret, hilarious name that I CAME UP WITH for my favorite (pronounced "fave-o-right") store?!?! Do you people have my room bugged or something? I swear, ever since Stupert Murdoch (another little gem of mine, and no you can't use it) bought MySpace, everytime I think of something funny, like a week later, I see it on TV, and I'm getting sick of it. So back off, ok? Yesterday I came up with a hilarious pun on Hillary Duff's name and if I find out someone has been eavesdropping, I am gonna be ticked...
Re:Uh oh (Score:3, Funny)
hrms, tough decision....
Re:Uh oh (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Uh oh (Score:5, Funny)
Please click here to visit the Macromedia site and download the free Flash player for your Web browser,
then return to our site to experience our site at its best.
It's so great running Linux. I couldn't view that crap even if I wanted to. Now if only all the other garbage on the web would take this precaution to protect me from seeing their sites...
Re:Uh oh (Score:4, Interesting)
So, out of curiosity, I peeked at their shockwave file:
http://a1.g.akamai.net/f/1/25623/1h/exxonmobil.do
exxonmobil?
Anyone who understands Akamai (better than I) feel up to explaining how that works? Shouldn't Wal Mart get their own subdomain walmart.download.akamai.com?
Re:Uh oh (Score:3, Funny)
That, or Wal-Mart's charming mascot is going to be cutting gas prices.
Re:Uh oh (Score:4, Funny)
-Eric
Re:Careful what you wish for (Score:2)
I dunno... (Score:2)
AdSpace (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:AdSpace (Score:3, Interesting)
Is it just me, or is that what this site already is? I actually looked at one of the 'hubsters' (shudder) and it seemed completely 100% staged. Are there any real 'kids' on this site? Can you even make your own site/have it listed there at all? I would tend to agree with the AC above - I actually think Myspace is better (uh oh, end of the world).
Re:AdSpace (Score:2)
Actually.. (Score:2, Interesting)
Actually I don't think of "hip" when I hear that name. If you ask me they got the name from "hub" as in a center point for many connections and a way for directing connections out in other directions. Which makes sense for a social networking site, but the fact that Wal-Mart isn't allowing users to contact each other pretty much just means theres no "outgoing" really. How is this social networking again, if you can't talk to other people?
In any case... (Score:2)
Re:Actually.. (Score:2)
The Hot Dog on a Stick [youtube.com] analogy can be applied to this to help explain how it can be according to marketing/corporate culture. For those afraid of a link with that title, the analogy can be summed up thusly: Consumer finds something compelling - a girl making lemonade at Hot Dog on a Stick (which involves bouncing and phallac instruments and a funny hat). Corporate marketing grabs some elements of that experience, making lemonade and si
Check, check and check... (Score:5, Insightful)
Parents notified? Check
Oooh, no email? Check
Yep, hits all my buttons.
Unfortunately, I'm a parent, with teenagers. I'd have as much success leading them to this site as I have getting them to tidy their rooms, speak respectfully to their elders and cook dinner occasionally.
Re:Check, check and check... (Score:5, Informative)
http://schoolyourway.walmart.com/index.php/Hubste
The e-mail:
What a joke.
They call that screening?
It's an opt-out e-mail!!!
They have to know that's a stupid idea.
I could have sent that confirmation e-mail anywhere.
Re:Check, check and check... (Score:2, Interesting)
That's Actually True (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:Check, check and check... (Score:2)
Re:You Speek the truth (Score:2, Interesting)
They can't find you online? That's probably only because they aren't computer literate. (Not to diss your parents, I'm sure they are very fine people) Once I get kids, I'm pretty sure that I'll find them online. If only because I handle the firewall/router here and can log exactly what they visit. Even if I didn't, it very feasible to simple get on their computer and check their browser history. (Kids don't get Admin - Fuck I don't give Admin to myself for mundane tasks)
You see, the problem is not
Re:My boy is still 7... (Score:2)
Wait till he's a teen and see what's left of that.
And please consider for a moment how bragging about how your kid is better than someone else's makes you sound. Don't be one of those people.
Grammar Nazi... (Score:3, Informative)
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
You missed the dept:
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
-dZ.
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
1) 'Trys' in that context was a word made up by the sporting community. It does not make it proper English in other contexts (as you point out, actually). Additionally, 'Trys' in that context is a
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
No one f*ing cares about rugby. I don't think the greater language community accepts their misspellings as proper English. I think it's well-recognized that rugby fans move their lips when they read, assuming they can.
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
Re:Grammar Nazi... (Score:2)
have a look at this score from the RFU website no less.http://www.rfu.com/index.cfm/fuseaction/RFUH
I would assume that they are the authority on these matters, if not the two teams playing should be.
Why Walmart? WHY? (Score:5, Insightful)
Actually, if I did want to express my individuality (which I don't, because I don't have low self-esteem), I would prefer to make my own site. That's a lot more individualistic than being part of a large mass of people on a big site.
Re:Why Walmart? WHY? (Score:3, Insightful)
There are two other non-exclusive factors besides low self-esteem.
If you're (too stupid to learn proper HTML and make webpages, or too lazy to bother) and (have low self-esteem) you go for sites like MySpace. Individualism doesn't trump stupidity nor laziness.
I think I just threw-up a bit (Score:5, Funny)
I think Walmart's been taking marketing advise from Steven Colbert:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PbJJUy1KD8 [youtube.com]
Re:I think I just threw-up a bit (Score:2)
-Eric
Dear Jeebus (Score:5, Funny)
I have finally seen it: The Worst Idea On The Internet.
I always thought it would come from Bush, Ballmer, or Bin Laden, but congratulations, Wal-Mart, you've won! Yes, because we all know that teens are clamoring to be associated with that haven of cool, the Wal-Mart Supercenter! They'll hang out all day in chat rooms monitored by a giant smiley face that threatens to "Roll back trolls"! They want clever, yet unoffensive nicknames like 'The gr33tr' and 'mop_guy_99'! They'll argue all day over whether they should get the 80-pack of Charmin or the 120-pack of generic brand toilet paper!
What teen wouldn't mind saying in the halls of their school, "I'll see ya on The HUB, dude!" "ya, see ya later, HUBSTER"?! (tragically these two kids were beaten to death with Abercrombie & Fitch merchandise a few moments later)
Seriously, I can imagine the Gap or Abercrombie, maybe even Starbucks doing this, but.... Wal-mart?!?!
I can only imagine that the kind of teen that would use Wal-mart for a social networking service are the ones who go there barefoot and pregnant because they thought Saran Wrap was a contraceptive. That and the guys who argue over Coors Lite vs. Miller Lite.
May Cthulu help us all.
Re:Dear Jeebus (Score:4, Funny)
>smiley face that threatens to "Roll back trolls"!
OK, now that *would* actually rock
Re:Dear Jeebus (Score:2)
Don't laugh. They probably are in bumfuck Oklahoma. You have to remember that walmart is the center of town for most of small town america. That and the dairy queen (don't get me started on dairy queen). In bumfuck Oklahoma all there is to do is to drink, fuck, and hang out at walmart.
Re:Dear Jeebus (Score:2)
Re:Dear Jeebus (Score:2)
The biggest WalMart out there is in Lower Sackville IIRC, not exactly population central, but it's just down the road from Halifax and Dartmouth, and I'm sure there's a bunch of stuff the other way. Besides which, it has to compete with a monster Canadian Tire. Might also be the biggest one out that way.
Re:Dear Jeebus (Score:2)
Well, laddy-da! Too good to drink Pabst Blue Ribbon, there professor?? Well, round these parts we don't drink fancy imports like "Miller Lite." GET THE HELL OUT OF MY TRAILER!!
-Eric
Re:Dear Jeebus (Score:4, Funny)
Words fail (Score:5, Interesting)
I can't believe how naive these failed-meme-launching marketing execs keep proving themselves to be.
There are 95 million myspace users and every week another million sign up. There aren't enough additional people in the Internet-using public in america to even come close to competing with myspace. They'd be lucky to pick up a couple hundred thousand users. And why would you use this instead of myspace?
This isn't intended to compete with myspace. It's just another marketing disaster.
"You've just become a member of one of the coolest cliques on the net. Be sure to spam your friends...
Wait for the goatse... Meanwhile I'll be uploading random copyright infringing content via tor... This must be good for something.
Re:Words fail (Score:2)
Re:Words fail (Score:2, Redundant)
Re:Words fail (Score:2)
Re:Words fail (Score:2, Insightful)
MySpace (Score:5, Insightful)
I've looked at MySpace but I just don't get it. It just full of crap. Perhaps I'm too old.
Can anyone point out a page that's actually worth looking at?
Re:MySpace (Score:5, Funny)
Yes, definitely. If, by old, you mean born before 1993.
Re:MySpace (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:MySpace (Score:3, Insightful)
Here is a Myspace page kinda sorta maybe worth looking at... The Terms of Service Page [myspace.com]. After that, it is all down hill.
Not wanting to sound like a troll, but I would describe MySpace as being something similar to the AOL effect (the legendary propensity of America Online users to utter contentless postings) plus Geocities (free websites for the masses) being applied to blogs. Sure, it gives a lot of people the means to
Re:MySpace (Score:4, Insightful)
I think the problem is you are looking at Myspace pages as a random passerby. I use my page to communicate to people who have an interest in what is going on in my life (friends, family, former classmates). Randomly going around Myspace is like looking into random people's diaries. Maybe you'll get a chuckle, but more often you'll be bored and confused.
MySpace for Adults (Score:3, Funny)
I'm not a big MySpace user, but a lot of my (adult) friends use it quite a lot for the "Music" section. By being attached to a big media company they've managed to get an official presence for almost every major label and band on that site, and they also allow unsigned/smaller bands to register themselves. My friends trawl around the music section looking for new bands, and the group of my friends that are in a band of their own use it to promote said band to fans of similar bands.
The pure social networkin
Re:MySpace (Score:3, Insightful)
"Everyone else is using it."
About the song... (Score:2, Offtopic)
Since when is Wal*Mart good for getting laid [thepunkgroup.com]?
omg ponies! (Score:3, Funny)
Re:About the song... (Score:2)
It's more of that viral marketing bullshit. (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:It's more of that viral marketing bullshit. (Score:2)
More details (Score:3, Interesting)
WHO'S BEHIND THIS GENIUS WEB DESTINATION?
The guys from Wal-Mart and Sony® teamed up to bring you all the sweet stuff you'll find on the HUB!
'nuff said.
MySpace.com for the Bible belt (Score:3, Funny)
Whats the point? (Score:2)
Then again, I think I'm too old for MySpace.
Re:Whats the point? (Score:2)
Since TFA didn't give the address (Score:2, Informative)
An Idea (Score:2, Insightful)
On the other hand, it could be worse.
They could have called t
Re:An Idea (Score:2)
Proof positive (Score:5, Insightful)
So, they are trying to take on this runaway train we call the web. Trouble is, they have been stuck in their little castles for so long, they no longer get the new world that is. Because they do not get it, they attempt a cheesy imitation of such.
The stunning irony here is that they actually believed this rip off would be found credible and there was no one within their ranks who was able to tell them how idiotic they looked.
This isn't the loss of a battle -- this is a total loss of the war.
Re:Proof positive (Score:2)
Reminds me (Score:3, Interesting)
Of the founder of a space opera ufo nut cult, alas Hubbard is written with a double 'b'.
Maybe Walmart just didn't want to get sued. [google.com].
Re:Reminds me (Score:2)
Seems "hamsters" might be more approriate.
Fix that spelling right fucking now. (Score:2, Insightful)
Fix, editors, fix! Edit, editors, edit!
Oooh new playground (Score:5, Funny)
I can't go egging houses, but tonight, yeeeess tonight we see what we can get past the censors at WalMart.
Will post updates here.
I should probably shave first.
Re:Oooh new playground (Score:3, Funny)
They said no nudity.
You guys are missing the point... (Score:4, Insightful)
Marketing data is what they are looking for.
Front page video (Score:3, Funny)
cute: 11111111
like: 111111111111
Re:Front page video (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Front page video (Score:2)
missing buzzword in title (Score:3, Funny)
Emulate myspace?!?!? Slashdot is really missing a story-click headline opportunity here. Walmart is launching a mySpace-KILLER!
Seth
it, like, takes a lot of time (Score:2, Funny)
That's the smartest thing I've heard in a while. Take out the slang "like" and this 14 year old girl analyzed, prioritized and made an executive-level decision.
It is a raging success! (Score:2)
It MUST be a raging success!
I can see the flames from it from here already!
People talk like this is a bad thing (Score:4, Interesting)
Five Oddities From Wal-Mart's 'The Hub' (Score:2, Interesting)
http://neverendinglists.blogspot.com/2006/07/five- oddities-from-wal-marts-hub.html [blogspot.com]
1. This site brought to you by Exxon Mobil
This one weirded me out, I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation: all images are hosted at exxonmobil.download.akamai.com. Paranoid meter now officially ON.
who will replace myspace? (Score:2)
If people are going to start moving away from myspace to other sites and services, which ones will people flock to?
Right now, my money's on Vox.
Re:who will replace myspace? (Score:2)
Pre-Programmed Failure (Score:3, Insightful)
Teens are way, way, way more interested in stuff made for adults.
Re:Probably not news but.. (Score:2)
Back on track, one wonders what the management structures must be like if a project gets this far without someone, somewhere in the Walmart behomoth saying 'umm, this is a really, really cheesy and embarassingly bad idea'.
This is the challenge of the early 21st century in a nutshell: how do the people who actually have a clue take back control of the means of production and communication from the megacorporations and governments and reverse the otherwise inevitable train wreck of human civilization tha