Itani-what?: Merced is Renamed 180
Anonymous Freak writes "Well, Intel has finally decided on a name for the first IA-64 processor. The processor formerly known as Merced is now called "Itanium". Boy, and I thought "Pentium" was a silly name when it first came out." Itanium - the mind boggles. Forget this - I'm still calling it Merced - although Itanium is targeted "at the Internet Economy" according to the press release *gag*.
Mmm, Itanium. (Score:3)
You know how this name happened, btw. Some moron just misspelled the name of a lightweight metal.
- A.P.
--
"One World, one Web, one Program" - Microsoft promotional ad
Gee, Itanium is the Internet Processor? (Score:2)
Well bell my cat - it was Intel all along!
Gawd, how much did Intel pay a marketing company for that clunker of a name?
- -Josh Turiel
Re:Instead of being stupid like everyone else (Score:1)
But it's pronounced... (Score:2)
(You're a very silly corporation and I'm not going to interview you!" "Oh please?")
Re:What's in a name? (Score:1)
-Barry
the word is pronunciation... (Score:1)
Wank-factor (Score:1)
pronounciation.. (Score:2)
1. Titanicium
2. Itty-bittium
3. Icantium
4. iWhackium
5. Inferorium
6. I'm sorry!
7. Yes, we are on something!
8. Merced
Itanium inside (Score:1)
Itanium- it's so fast... (Score:1)
and Andy Grove, in another fit of drunkenness, has them make it so.
"Wait, no, Andy, it was just a dumb scribble! No, we can't put Superman in the ads, either!!" ...
I like it better backwards... (Score:3)
Or, with a bit of help from an anagram generator:
mini tau
I am unit
Hmmm... the first sounds like it's from Austin Powers, the second from Star Trek.
--
It's October 6th. Where's W2K? Over the horizon again, eh?
alternate names (Score:3)
vaporium - cause it is all just hot air
subathlonium - cause even with the extra 32 bits, it is still slower than athlon
bankruptium - what it is gonna do for intel
Itanium: A Wonderful Name (Score:2)
The fact that it sounds somewhat like some obscure sort of "rare earth" metal is likely good for Intel; they can have some e1eete k001 commercials involving glowing metallic substances, not unlike one of Nokia's latest that shows off a chrome-bright cell phone rather than those boring old black ones. Itanium can provide us the burning chrome approach...
This also provides a natural progression towards jokes involving the Hacker's Dictionary definition for "Chrome" which caused great hilarity when Microsoft announced Microsoft Chrome which not only conformed to the "useless but pretty" definition of Chrome, but actually used the same word to describe it. In effect, Itanium is Really Fancy Chrome!
It's a nice bonus that the name leaves it to minor modifications of a scatalogical nature so as to allow Further Jokes. If the chip is rectangular, the next PPC commercial will doubtless show off a burned-up shrivelled-up, brown Itanium chip, leaving any comparisons to other materials to be filled in by the viewer...
How do pronounce "it" (Score:1)
Now, is it I'-ta'-nee-um or i-ta'-nee-um? Or wait... could there be a schwa sound at the front? Why don't I have a key for an upside down e? If it was so damn important that they had to bug the sh*t out of me in elementary school, why isn't there a key for it when I want to use or discuss it? [If someone brings up alternative keyboards I'll begin firing my BFG indiscriminately into the crowd here at the post office.]
_damnit_
Re:But not... (Score:1)
Re:*sigh* (Score:1)
Simpsons CPUs (Score:1)
Re:Predicted future chip names (Score:1)
Nope, it's Oneon!
Itanium *could* mean this. (Score:5)
Perhaps it really is a fitting name for this new chip after all?
*hiccup* (Score:1)
Itanium? Titanium? It offers the deprecatory "sh" prefix, all too easily.
I.T.A.N.I.U.M. = ... (Score:3)
T ries
A lternate
N ame --
I t's
U nbelievable
M arketing!
More Intel product names (Score:1)
12. Igermanium (for use in greenhouses, or for people in Berlin)
11. Ifrancium (because the French like to be incompatible with everybody)
10. Iboronium (for people who speak in a monotone)
9. Iluminum (for people who are convinced they are highly intelligent)
8. Isiliconium (for women
7. Iargonium (for people with really bad grammar)
6. Iscandium (for use by reporters)
5. Iironium (for your health, or for use while doing the laundry)
4. Ikryptonium (for sci-fi fanatics, or for deciphering messages)
3. IHoSilverium (for Lone Ranger fans)
2. Iridium (name available again now that the satellite system went under)
1. Iranium (faulty product for sale to countries we don't like)
We finally have proof ... (Score:1)
It could mean... (Score:1)
one year in the making? (Score:5)
Registrant:
Intel Corporation (ITANIUM-DOM)
2200 Mission College Blvd
M/S SC4-203
Santa Clara, CA 95052-8119
Domain Name: ITANIUM.COM
... snip
Record last updated on 01-Oct-98.
Record created on 01-Oct-98.
Record created 01-Oct-98? Have they really been planning on naming the ship "itanium" for ONE YEAR? You would have thought that they would have been able to come up with a better name in a *year's* time. Or at least though better of it...
Ack.
Re:Itanium *could* mean this. (Score:3)
WTF is the "Internet Economy" and how do you "target" a chip at it?
Is that like "targeting" the DreamCast at the pimple-geek economy?
I picture going to the Trading Floor at your nearest stock exchange and whipping these things at anyone who buys and sells dot-com stocks.
Hope itanium explodes on impact!
Wonder how it reacts to heat as a catalyst?
mindslip
What do you think about this? (Score:1)
Re:Give 'em some credit (Score:2)
(i786? Wouldn't that be Willamette? The Pentium III, and the Xeon Warrior Princess flavors of the PII/PIII, are based on the same P6 CPU core, so I'd think of them as i686's.)
I suspect Intel decided to use Pentium as the brand name for (all but the lower-end) IA-32 processors, preserving brand equity or whatever the hell the marketoon term is; I wouldn't be surprised to see McKinley be the Itanium II or something such as that.
Itani-what? (Score:1)
How about Uranium ? (Score:1)
Re:Unfortunate Move. (Score:1)
How do you pronouce that anyway? I always pronounce as murked (i.e. the past tense of murk), but I've heard mur-said, murk-ed, mur-ked, murk-id, mur-sid...
Re:Itanium *could* mean this (THE ITANIUM SONG). (Score:2)
WTF is the "Internet Economy" and how do you "target" a chip at it?
Hmmm... Internet Economy... well, let's see. What does a normal computer chip do that you don't need to stare at webpages? Hmmm... Floating point math! This is clearly just a marketing doublespeak way of saying:
Sort of like a Pentium.Even more interesting is going to be the Intel marketing. How does one market such a wretched sounding name? Are they planning on selling this as a mixture of the Internet and the Pentium? Well, geeh, that's great. As if the Pentium did not already have enough privacy problems.
Hmmm... Now all they need is a nice jingle...
Lacking germanium, we made it out of wild geranium,
Nullifying your privacy to a symposium!
Itanium, it sounds like titanium!
Itanium, it's less stable than uranium!
Itanium, the only chip built in a gymnasium,
Sending it strait to a crematorium!
Itanium, it sounds like titanium!
Itanium, it's less stable than uranium!
Itanium, it's giving our lawyers a honorarium,
You'd rather have Cryptosporidium!
Itanium, it sounds like titanium!
Itanium, it's less stable than uranium!
I would love to see that on an Intel commercial!
Hmm. Someone didn't know how to spell. (Score:1)
or is a dropped T the result of passing the string through some of intel's processors?
And I really was waiting for Intel to release the "sextium" (follows from Pentium).
Re:A little bit of a deja vu (Score:1)
ludicronyms (Score:3)
--
It's October 6th. Where's W2K? Over the horizon again, eh?
Re:A new SlapDash record! (Score:3)
Re:Will these annoying Beowulf post never end? (Score:1)
Re:What's in a name? (Score:2)
Is it studleyCapped as iTanium? Can we have a uTanium? A weTanium for SMP systems? Will aPple sue them for putting the letter "i" in front of nonsense?
I guess if DS9 can c/Platinum/Latinum/, Intel can do the same to it's own products. What the hell was wrong with "Merced", anyway?
--
Re:More Intel product names (Score:1)
--
It's October 6th. Where's W2K? Over the horizon again, eh?
Marketing (Score:1)
My first reaction to the thing was, "Intel has totally given up on marketing on the basis of quality, and value to the customer. What they're now doing is marketing on the basis of the *ignorance* of their new target market."
Oh yeah, and I have a PPro 180 oc'ed to 233. My last intel processor ever, hopefully. The only things that don't run fast enough are certain games. (Remember when games used to be the *most* optimized programs out there?)
Re:Give 'em some credit (Score:1)
Pentium 2, and Pentium 2 Xeon, are the same as a Pentium Pro, only with MMX instructions, and more (and in some cases slower) cache.
Pentium 3 is the same as a Pentium 2, only with more new instructions, added to combat 3DNow
Compare this with the differences between the 486 and the Pentium, or between the Pentium and the Pentium Pro. Now, *those* were significant enough to call them new generations.
What's worse than... (Score:1)
LINUX stands for: Linux Inux Nux Ux X
Re:AND . . . . (Score:1)
Once upon a time school administrators preached the gospel of "you can never go wrong with IBM". First they resisted PCs in favor of their mainframes, then they resisted non-IBM PCs. They gave variation of the same reasons you mention. They dumped huge piles of scarce money at the doors of Big Blue. They continued to do this while systems costing half as much and twice as capable were available. Meanwhile the students they were supposedly there to serve were lined up to use the scarce computers.
Administrators who waste money like this should be fired.
School administrators frightened of learning something new have no business working in a school, where people are supposed to be all about learining new things.
And furthermore, AMD CPUs are hardly "hacker hardware" (in the sense you mean). They're fast and inexpensive, a good bang for the buck. This leaves more money to buy other "hacker hardware". You know, more computers for those pesky students you're supposed to be helping!
Adapt or move aside, but don't hold everyone else back just because you're afraid of change.
Shouldn't it be ... (Score:1)
Mercedes -> Merced ; Titanium -> Itanium (Score:1)
I think one of the chief marketing people at intel has a hearing deficit and can't quite catch all of those conversations around the water cooler.
Either that, or intel's PHBs are running their spell-checkers on their new chip prototypes.
PKG
------------------------------
Common sense is not so common.
Re:Predicted future chip names (Score:1)
2006: Intel release Viagrium. A overdrive for the Titanium II that gives more power to the processor, and improves stability, helping it 'stay up' longer....
Re:Intel's domain registrations (Score:1)
Hey guys, let's get /into/ the internet (Score:1)
Re:alternate names (Score:1)
Re:A little bit of a deja vu (Score:1)
Targeting "the Internet Economy" (Score:4)
Barrons [barrons.com] had an interesting piece on Intel this week, entitled "Intel NOT Inside."
In that article as well, Intel claimed that it was targeting the internet economy. The implied reasoning was that the profit ratio is about the same on the $500 chips as the $100 Celeron, so they're about five times as lucrative. The article estimates that one server-class machine is needed for every ten consumer machines on the Internet.
If consumer hardware is getting cheaper while server hardware is staying steady or even advancing in cost, we can see where the safe money's going to be for Intel.
Given the above, and the article's further declaration that Intel has already made/is trying to make further inroads into the embedded controller market where switches, hubs, etc are concerned, we can determine that Internet Economy is obscure jargon for the Internet server and networking hardware market.
--
My question for Intel is whether it's prudent to explicitly remove emphasis from lower end systems (if that's what they truly intend). By Intel's admission, the $100 chips still make the same percentage profit. Wouldn't it make more sense to get on the ball and start pushing Microsoft and game developers to make use of SMP in consumer products, and to then push its low-end SMP-capable processors?
Imagine the benefit to Intel (and us) if they let companies continue to make these sub-$1000-PCs, but if each had 3 spaces free for candy-colored $200 cartridge with another processor and a bit of RAM inside. Average consumers can finally buy that PC that lasts them 5 years, and Intel still gets (eventually) the full price of a server-class chip when people finally upgrade. (And I'll wager quite a few will if they can do it in sub $200 increments!)
[OT] How Sun came up with "Java" (Score:3)
Scary... but sensible too.
Intel and Volkswagen (Score:2)
I don't know what's worse... Volkswagen advertising its new car by showing it spinning like a top or Intel advertising a computer chip as making the Internet better, as if moire processing speed means better bandwidth (or disk I/O, which we all know is the real performance bottleneck!)
Marketing seems to be getting stupider and stupider.
Rick (happy with a 200MHz PPro)
Re:Itanium inside (Score:1)
Ahem...you forgot us Digital/Compaq Alpha people!
Pentium Successor... (Score:1)
ew ntel ompany otto. (Score:1)
---
Re:Instead of being stupid like everyone else (Score:1)
---
Re:Instead of being stupid like everyone else (Score:1)
Of course not half a second after posting, I remember Hs.
Re:Intel Names (Score:1)
Another holy-war? (Score:1)
On one side, there will be the people who prefer to pronounce Itanium with a long a (like in "pay"), and on the other those who prefer a short a (like in "mad").
Of course, the guy who invented the name won't be able to help, as he will prefer pronouncing the a as "ah", which everyone else will refuse to do because it sounds silly.
-Kenton Varda
Re:Mmm, Itanium. (Score:1)
Originality is a blessing, not an excuse to steal someone else's idea.
Re:Dell (Score:1)
Re:Itanium *could* mean this. (Score:1)
If you look it up in any good Latin dictionary, you find that it roughly means, "an exchange between two parties in which one parties receives little value for its money."
Of course, Webster reads as, "To be screwed. i.e., to be Bill Gate'd."
This ends our class today.
Re:[OT] How Sun came up with "Java" (Score:1)
Re:Mmm, Itanium. (Score:1)
Re:[OT] How Sun came up with "Java" (Score:1)
What does TWAIN (the image input standard they use for most scanner drivers) stand for...?
Re:Another holy-war? (Score:1)
We whought we had it bad with "GIF" and "Linux".
Itanium OR rather Itanic... (Score:1)
Perhaps, after that recent bug discovery, Intel should also rename Xeon to Xeonic...
Re:What about the Celeron-Carroton-Cucumberon chip (Score:1)
Sexium sounds better to me (Score:1)
Give 'em some credit (Score:1)
CPU nomenclature should revert to numbers and acronyms--there's just something that feels good about the words "SPARC" or "486DX2," for example.
The chipset formerly known as merced (Score:1)
- MbM
Insane-ium (Score:2)
the mind reels with potential Shakespearean references, here. I wonder if the next generation will be called the "Oberon"? Or if they will just cut the crap and show us their "Bottom"
Or will they market this turkey with a "DS9" flair as a Ferengi invention and expect people to bid on 'em with bars of Latanum.
I'm getting a G4 chip based box and I'll have gigaflop rather than a marketing-flop.
It's a marketing thing (Score:1)
Don't forget... (Score:1)
"with the new Itanium 64 bit you can ever more enjoy you pron site surfing: Itanium 64, the viagra of the processors."
Re:Instead of being stupid like everyone else (Score:1)
Okay, okay. Fr, Ni, or Au would do too. But that's my final offer.
... (Score:1)
For example: Recently I applied for a job at PlanetRX.com being one of their AIX admins. When I went into the interview they told me right off the bat that they aren't interested in any wINTEL or MAC experience. They didn't want MCSE(D). They wanted pure sun hardware experience with an expert knowledge of AIX and Solaris.
I guess intel is realizing that they aren't being shown as a big server processor making company, and that they have to come up with buzz words and say things like they are the "Intel in Intelligent Ecommerce"
Re:Pentium ? a silly name ? (Score:1)
and what about Titanicium? (Score:1)
Intel's domain registrations (Score:4)
advice4pc.com
advice4pcs.com
adviceforpc.com
adviceforpcs.com
alder.com
andrewgrove.net
andrewgrove.org
andrewsgrove.net
andrewsgrove.org
andygrove.com
andygrove.net
andygrove.org
andysgrove.com
andysgrove.net
andysgrove.org
answerexpress.com
answerexpress.net
answerexpress.org
bunnypeople.com
bunnypeople.net
bunnypeople.org
celeron.com
celeron.net
celeron.org
cenarrion.com
chips.com
computersw.com
connectedpc.com
corollary.com
craigbarrett.net
craigbarrett.org
craigrbarrett.com
craigrbarrett.net
craigrbarrett.org
createshare.com
createshare.net
createshare.org
dayna.com
digitalguide-canada.com
digitalguide-germany.com
digitalguide-uk.com
digitalstage.com
direct-dial.com
epigean.com
etherprint.com
gordonmoore.net
gordonmoore.org
hig.com
intc.com
intel-inside.net
intel-inside.org
intel.com
intel.net
intel.org
intelceleron.com
intelceleron.net
intelceleron.org
intellabs.com
intelweboutfitter.com
intelweboutfitter.net
intelweboutfitter.org
intelweboutfitters.com
intercast.com
intregister.com
inymf.com
itanium.com
itanium.net
itanium.org
managedpc.com
mmx.com
multimediaextensions.com
mycartoon.com
mycartoons.com
netpc.com
opteon.com
opteon.net
opteon.org
pc.com
pcdads.com
pcparents.com
pentium.com
pentium4.com
pentium5.com
pentium6.com
pentiumiii.com
pentiumiixeon.com
pentiummmx.com
shelfofshame.com
shop-intel.com
thiswayin.com
toriac.com
tv-rom.com
tvrom.com
weboutfitter.com
weboutfitter.net
weboutfitter.org
xeon.com
Stupid Name (Score:1)
Re:What do you think about this? (Score:1)
Colour of Magic, and all that - and it's red 'cos it overheats too?
Re:?itanic made money. (Score:1)
At least there are two different articles. (Score:1)
Other Slashdot Itanium article [slashdot.org]
~afniv
"Man könnte froh sein, wenn die Luft so rein wäre wie das Bier"
Re:A new SlapDash record! (Score:1)
Continuing Intel Trend... (Score:1)
Another thing you have to consider is cost... If the P3 is a consumer chip and it costs $800, how much will this "Internet Chip" cost? You could probably get an entire AMD-based system for the cost of one Mercedes chip.
Will it actually be worth it? Or will it be another chip the Intel cranks out, and they know people will buy it because they're Intel, and they're "the best".
Re:What's in a name? (Score:1)
I think Merced reached critical mass (criticality?) with Negative Mindshare. The stories about missed shipped dates, production problems, etc. had gotten so large that people were expecting the chip to fail regardless of how good it was, or of how accurate the stories were.
inshort, the old name was FUD'ed to death
Re:Itanium *could* mean this. (Score:5)
Maybe...but I'd put my money on Itanic
Unfortunate Move. (Score:2)
pity. Not that I like Intel much, but...pity.
--Lenny
Well, at least... (Score:2)
Re:Itanium: A Wonderful Name (Score:1)
"eCPU" and "eChip", however, are redundant, since CPUs and chips are, by there very nature, electronic.
Unless we're talking about potato chips... but I can't envision what an e(potato)Chip might be. Poker eChips, OTOH, might have some application in on-line gambling.
--
Re:Itanium: A Wonderful Name (Score:1)
Re:alternate names (Score:1)
Predicted future chip names (Score:5)
I think I can extrapolate some future Intel chip names based on their previous track record:
2002: The Itanium II is introduced, with new AMI (Advanced Marketing Instructions) Technology(tm)
late 2002: A low-cost version of the Itanium core comes out, called either "Asparagon" or "Vidalion"
2004: Itanium III (duh)
late 2005: Intel's first 128-bit CPU is announced, which will be named Delirium.
Re:Continuing Intel Trend... (Score:2)
Oh gack, here we go again (Score:4)
"Intanium: This One Will Actually Enhance Your Internet Experience, Honestly!"
"Intanium: If You Thought The 32-Bit Internet Was Great, Wait Until You See The 64-Bit Internet!"
"Intanium: Databases Will Commit Transactions Like Never Before."
You do have to look at it from Intel Marketing's point of view... how do you hype "Do Things Faster" when that's been your line for the last 20 years and is, apparently, wearing thin with the management.
Still, I can think of a campaign targetting the slashdot crowd that would work well:
"Intanium: Have A Computer More Powerful Then Most Servers You Visit!"
Now that, that just sings to me, baby!
Re:Intel's domain registrations (Score:3)
I also think it's kind of funny they registered shelfofshame.com
-Peat
But not... (Score:2)
intelsucks.org
xeonisslow.com
xeonisslow.net
xeonisslow.org
mmxsucks.com
etc...
etc...
I though I heard it was a trend of company's to register their name or product and sucks as in "xxxsucks.com" if only to not let other people take those sights and do something with them.
-----
By the way, if you moderate me down, you obviously have no sense of self... or humor....
Scanners detect no intelligent life forms. (Score:3)
"Captain Janeway, we have no choice but to go around this solar system, it is contaminated with dangerous levels of itanium radiation from the Moron's toxic waste dump."
"No, Seven, that would add days to our trip back home. We can enhance the shields with that alien technology we conveniently picked up at the Spinwise Central Delta Quadrant trade show and job fair last week."
"That is efficient, but is the level of risk acceptable?"
"What's the worst that can happen? If the shields fail we'll have an excuse for the writers to forget about it in future episodes. At worst we'll lose a shuttle craft and a couple of extras."
"Very well, I will connect the alien technology to our deflector grid. It should only take a few hours despite the fact that we have no interfaces or protocols in common."
Itanium. (Score:5)
However, late one night the ill-fated CPU struck a large 32-bit instruction floating somewhere in the "Internet information economy" which ripped a large hole in her stack and damaged her bus. With the cache on fire, the order was made to abandon chip.
Luckily a nearby chip, the SS Athlon was able to support all of the Itanium's users and no lives were lost.
Except for that damn Leo DiCaprio who exploded.
Hotnutz.com [hotnutz.com]