Why Emails Are Misunderstood 337
werdna writes "The Christian Science Monitor has a piece on why it's so easy to misinterpret emails.
From the article: 'First and foremost, e-mail lacks cues like facial expression and tone of voice. That makes it difficult for recipients to decode meaning well. Second, the prospect of instantaneous communication creates an urgency that pressures e-mailers to think and write quickly, which can lead to carelessness. Finally, the inability to develop personal rapport over e-mail makes relationships fragile in the face of conflict.'"
inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missing (Score:5, Insightful)
From that article, I agree: "If you're vulnerable to this kind of unintentional prejudice, pick up the phone: People are much less likely to prejudge after communicating by phone than they are after receiving an e-mail."
But, from the article, I disagree: "E-mail tends to be short and to the point." While e-mail can be short and sweet, I've found it to be all over the map. I've seen e-mail as a freebie for people who expound ad nauseum, and it's (e-mail) ubiquitous presence multiplies the wandering missives. Short and sweet is more typical in business settings (though I've seen epics there, too.)
Consider the classic following example. Read each sentence out loud, with emphasis on the bolded word.
I've fallen prey to this. It's too easy to project either your mood, or your opinion, etc. into an e-mail's text and consequently misinterpret the senders intent, message, sometimes to the extent you've flipped their intent 180 degrees.
Most of the time this is just a nuisance. Sometimes it can be amusing -- a story to share over beer (free).
It is worth exercising due care though to avoid escalations and huge misunderstandings sometimes creating hard feelings, and in more extreme cases damaging relationships. I learned from a few hard lessons, if after a few exchanges a dialog became testy and began escalation, I'd intervene on behalf of myself and the correspondent by curtailing the e-mail until a quick chat on the phone could reset the tone. That almost always worked.
(While some use some convention to help make tone and such more clear (e.g., *word*, emoticons, ALL-CAPS, etc.), I've found that to help marginally, and in some cases inflame a tense dialog further when that was not the intent.)
Then what about HTML format emails? (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:Then what about HTML format emails? (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:Then what about HTML format emails? (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:5, Interesting)
You're right in that substitutes for tone of voice and facial expressions are creeping into the language in the form of emoticons etc, but I wonder how long it will be before emoticons are considered to be a proper part of natural languages in the same way that normal punctuation is?
The constructed language Lojban [lojban.org] takes this a step further, with attitudinal indicators that are the rough analogue of emoticons. For instance, .u'i in a sentence indicates that you are amused. However attitudinal indicators are actually a part of the language proper, and are even spoken out loud.
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:3, Interesting)
I didn't steal the money.
vs.
I didn't steal the money.
The second conveys a kind of shrugged shoulders, palms upward vibe. It not only says that I didn't steal the money, but also conveys my view that stealing a few bucks is a relatively minor problem and we shou
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:4, Informative)
In any case, this smiley after that sentence would inevitably give me a very negative impression about you.
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:2, Funny)
That's why God made CAPITAL letters (Score:5, Funny)
mr smith...
these accusations are an outrage... I didnt steal the money... talk with bob from accounting...
toodles...
ted from the mailroom
See? Clear as a bell. Obviously, ted didn't steal the money. And those ellipses help each sentence flow smoothly into the next.
Bonus suggestion: If an entire message is important, JUST CAPITALIZE EVERY LETTER. THAT WILL FORCE PEOPLE TO LISTEN AND MAKE YOU SOUND IMPORTANT.
iLIFE (Score:3, Funny)
iLife = you really have no life, but let's pretend
iPod = you think this is about you?? LOL!!!11 Look at our profits for the past 3 years.
Re:Addendum (Score:2)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:3, Funny)
I just happen to be very fashion-concious, but for some reason ....
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:2)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:5, Funny)
* I didn't steal the money.
I can only imagine thousands of cubical dwellers reaction to their neighbor muttering "I didn't steal the money" over and over again.
Tommarow, lets go for "I won't kill the president today".
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:2, Funny)
i splattered coffee all over my monitor..
now i have to find a way to clean it up without having to expain that i was reading
hmm. maybe i should just wander around saying "I didn't spill the coffee."
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:5, Funny)
One sec, someone's at the door.
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:2, Insightful)
Importance of Capitalization (Score:5, Funny)
v/s
I helped my uncle jack off the horse
Re:Change the damn subject line -and synopsize (Score:2)
Sometimes It is possible to refocus the group and get back to the point by CHANGING the subject line from something like: RE: re: re: re Big Problem
to:
Server parameter changes n
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:3, Insightful)
And yet you, using only text, have been able to use the same five words in the same order in five different ways, delivering five different subtle meanings.
This points to the fact that the problem is not with writing vs. speaking, but (as I have said many times before to many people) with the way a message is written.
Too many people think that an email (or any written message) is simply "whatever I would sa
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:3, Insightful)
Much like slashdot posts. (I kid, I kid
I believe the real problem with email can be summed up in two statements.
People don't read carefully.
People don't write carefully.
This is sometimes the cause of turgid e-mails. (Score:3, Insightful)
Consider the following sets of sentences:
The parent post correctly points out that often there is not enough context to provide cues to allow the recipient to decode all the information the sender intended to convey.
There are something like four main channels we use to communicate when s
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:3, Funny)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:5, Funny)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:2)
Actually, from people I've spoken to about language, English is not very inflection-dependant, if you speak it correctly. A language like Mandarin relies much, much more heavily on the way a word is said. The only reason most English speakers have trouble making themselves understood through email is that they can't actually speak the language properly.
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:5, Funny)
Re:inflection, emphasis, tone, etc. usually missin (Score:4, Funny)
How about "Ambiguously written English is ambiguous?"
Tautologies FTW!
Remember: (Score:2)
My opinion on this article... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Smilies are under-rated (Score:2)
Totally agree. Although they're annoying, there the best way of defining your tone when something might sound ambiguous. I think TFA should mention this, because after all this is a substitute for facial expressions, although it should be used with care (because personally I think that a couple of smileys per mail is already enough)
Re:Smilies are under-rated (Score:2)
I do find myself throwing a few in for emphasis once I have already developed a rapport with somebody, but I'd never do it in a professional email to someone I didn't feel I knew well enough to understand it as an additional communication, rather than cutesy childish decorations.
Another reason... (Score:5, Funny)
It's really hard to read their broken English. I spent at least 3 days emailing back and forth before I figured how to send them $10000 from my bank account.
Now, I'm just waiting for the cash to roll in......
I'm Pretty Sure... (Score:3, Funny)
I'm pretty sure...
Ignorance and Illiteracy (Score:4, Insightful)
Better educated people are able to write and clearly convey a point or concept or emotion. They are also able to properly judge when it is suitable to use a one line message and when it is necessary to write three pages of text to accurately convey a point.
But, the masses that use email seem to lack this basic level of literacy. They generally lack discipline as well as writing ability. Sadly, the problem is only getting worse as instant messaging and SMS text messaging invade popular culture and further erode basic literacy.
Education and Literacy (Score:2, Insightful)
Books and Newspapers are written by people who are supposed to be good at communications, but often the articles are confusing, misleading, uninformed, biased or just plain wrong.
The truth is that people are doing the communicating and people are flawed. I believe emails can have all
Re:Education and Literacy (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:Ignorance and Illiteracy (Score:2, Insightful)
"This is because the difficulty and cost in producing these media better restrict access to those that are better educated."
That is true (in most cases), but the "difficulty and cost" also result in additional editing and proofreading. Certainly in the case of a book, the text may be read by many people (author, author's friends, collegues, editors, etc.) before going to the publisher.
Unfortunately, those people do not always understand the author's meaning (e.g. technical writing), so you'll still f
This why I hate smilies.. (Score:5, Insightful)
Language erosion over time? (Score:2)
You are so right. I think it's due to two things:
1) modern (il)literacy
2) the immediacy of modern communications
These combine to make sloppy, poorly constructed communication commonplace and, frankly, good enough in most situations. In the days (e.g. 1800s) when a letter would take a month (or three... or a year) to travel some great distance
Fu the rescue! (Score:3, Funny)
FU U F'ing F'er.
Such a versitile word. And no confusion!
Emoticons (Score:5, Insightful)
Or am I mad at those people >:(
All these thoughts make me sad
and cry
Who can be indifferent about these things
I would be ecstatic
Ah well, back to my nintendo (>',')>
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
all you need to do.. (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:all you need to do.. (Score:5, Funny)
Hi. I am the founder of the "Adenoid Hypertrophy" Foundation. I must inform you that adenoid hypertrophy, if left uncorrected during childhood and early adolescence will result in an increase longitudinal and decreased lateral length of the face of the sufferer. This is called Adenoid fascies by doctors, and looks like a "long face". As a representative of the thousands of people who suffer from this disfiguring disease, I must say that we are offended by your reference to "long faces" as if this were some sort of joke. We consider ourselves damaged by your remarks and insist that you retract your statement immediately or face the consequences which may include litigation.
Same as a snail mail letter (Score:4, Interesting)
Re:Same as a snail mail letter (Score:3, Interesting)
Depends on what you mean. I think I agree that the difference between email and letter-writing is purely a function of speed and ease, but I don't think the difference is "simple." The care someone puts into writing an email is affected by the fact that the recipient can instantaneously reply and ask for clarification. The same operation with a letter might take days or weeks. An email is not just a fa
Rapport (Score:4, Interesting)
Email should be one communication tool in your toolbelt. Not the only one. Re-read your email before you send it. See if you can understand it, reading it from an objective point of view. I'm sure editors and authors do this all the time.
I typically put a bunch of garbage in an email, re-read it, and throw 90% of the garbage out, and am left with two short sentences that get my point across. When I ramble on and on and on, people get bored. (like this post).
Re:Rapport (Score:3, Funny)
Woops I goofed.
Um... (Score:4, Interesting)
Email is just like IM chat when I am emailing or chating with a friend or coworker I know personaly I often think to myself "this doesn't sound like so and so". When it is someone I don't know personaly that wierdness is not there... because I have no baseline to compare to.
One thing I do find helps is adding headers and footers to the emails even if it is a quick "good morning So and so" or a "Thanks," before my auto signature(I am not in sales but the same principals used there can apply to many proffesonal settings). The only time I really don't look for things like that is when I know that the person is on a blackberry, and then being overly breif can be forgiven.
Ever heard of emoticons? (Score:2)
But it can work for good as well... (Score:3, Interesting)
I read it on Slashdot moments ago (Score:4, Funny)
True, even in Slashdot posts (Score:2, Insightful)
Short of writing like Charles Dickens I don't anticipate a solution any time soon. (Webcam?)
another favorite example... unintended semantics (Score:4, Interesting)
What makes understanding (and meaning) problematic in e-mail is also well known in AI research. Language, while syntactically specific, grants latitude and license in rule usage and interpretation/extraction of meaning.
A favorite example of the nuance of true interpretation:
SNL (Score:2)
Even more shocking, from TFA (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:Even more shocking, from TFA (Score:4, Funny)
I have been waiting. (Score:5, Funny)
Ok kids we got this, yes this issue spawned emoticons, can we move on to more important things like Gizmodo execs and Enzo's cut in half.
Same thing goes for posts (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Same thing goes for posts (Score:2)
Mine does, doesn't yours?
RL (Score:2, Insightful)
Time Warp (Score:2)
Glad to see christian science is keeping up with the times - I found this article very useful. Do you think that it also applies to world wide web chat rooms like Slashdot?
Re:Time Warp (Score:2)
I do find it amusing though that an article about the difficulties communicating via email (or any fast written medium) would make the Slashdot main page in 2006.
I'm guilty of this... (Score:3, Insightful)
Finally, the inability to develop personal rapport over e-mail makes relationships fragile in the face of conflict.
Awhile ago I was working on a project with a few freelancers. It worked out well, so we continued working together. Everything was roses until we ended up in a really ugly project and the "blame game" started. A day later, this wonderful "team" of ours was nothing but a ghost. The resulting flamewar would make even the most persistant /. troll blush.
Freelancer != Employee
Email/IM != Meeting
I'm not sure why, but it would seem as though people *need* to be forced together into horrible and painful meetings when the time comes to make "tough choices".
My mistake was in allowing my own anti-meeting bias to cloud my better judgement.
But sometimes emails are supposed to offend (Score:5, Insightful)
The problem is people feel much freer to express extreme anger, curse, and belittle people over email than they ever would in real life.
Look at many of the posts to this website - while some people really are complete assholes, I'd bet a significant fraction of the posts here would NEVER be said in a face-to-face conversation (particularly if someone dares to actually compliment Windows). That's precisely because emails correctly convey emotion that most people won't express in real life.
Fighting via email (Score:3, Interesting)
It was also impossible to end the fight over email, as anything I said always lead to more problems, until I could talk her into getting back on MSN Messenger to talk with me either by messages, or through a voice-call.
I think email is easy to hide behind and perfect for chewing someone out, but doesn't have a warm fuzzy side to it at all.
Work rules (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Work rules (Score:2)
What is the tone of this article? (Score:2)
Why misunderstanding is misunderstood (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Why misunderstanding is misunderstood (Score:3, Interesting)
Or intentionally offended...
I had a sig that was a quote from a co-worker about me: "You're a Mac user... you're left-handed... you eat Miracle Whip... *and* you're Polish? You're not from this planet!" One day some middle-manager type woman came up to me and informed me that my sig was offensive to her, as "eating Miracle Whip" was an offensive and suggestive comment in certain places, and that I had to change it,
Re:Why misunderstanding is misunderstood (Score:3)
You took the safe way out, but you could have just as easily worked up some fake indignation & gone the whole "how dare you suggest... I'm a professional... I should report you" route. Might give her some pause before she gets 'offended' the next time.
Both are valid options, I just hate giving those people the satisfaction.
Your story kinda reminds me of the NY Times "scumbag" blowout in their crossword puzzle. First linky from Google: http://www.slate.co [slate.com]
Re:Why misunderstanding is misunderstood (Score:2)
Dear Mr. Chemisor,
I like you. We are friends. A certain relative of mine is in need of TEN THOUSAND US DOLLARS ($10,000.00) in order to be able to release from customs a container full of merchandise valued at TEN MILLION US DOLLARS ($10,000,000.00). I have told him about you my good friend Mr. Chemisor and as a friend I know you will help us take this shipment from the customs and in return my relativ
To my dear Nigerian friend (Score:3, Funny)
I certainly appreciate your gracious offer of friendship and, according to my philosophy, will immediately start treating you like one. In the name of our newly-forged friendship, I am wondering if you would be kind enough to advance me TEN THOUSAND US DOLLARS ($10,000.00) to rescue your troubled friend and his container. Surely, as a president of a bank, you ought to have no difficulty in procuring these funds and loaning them to me, your dearest friend, would you? In return you will have my
Back to flamewars (Score:2)
In other words, that's not really news, is it?
WOW! (Score:2)
Shit, being a scientist is sure a hell of a complex job.
I've never EVER read than in thousands of other articles throughout the last 10 years, and it's totally not common knowledge. Honest!
Poor Vocabulary? (Score:5, Interesting)
Compare the letters written by- for example- soldiers during the civil war with letters that are written today. It should be a safe assumption that the regular infantry whos letters are oft cited from that era would be average for the time period. In both cases, we are dealing with a form of written communication. While it is perhaps true that letters written before the advent of email were subject to more revisions and were generally more well thought out, the fact is that there is a much larger breadth of vocabulary used in them. I think that if people today were willing and able to use a larger vocabulary they would be able to correspond more effectively and avoid misunderstandings.
Re:Poor Vocabulary? (Score:3, Insightful)
You usage of populous completely misses the meaning of the word, it refers to a large population in a given place, not a part of a given population. Perhaps you were being pompous and referring to your less than literate majority, I don't know.
Also, believe not beleive, subtler is more subtle than "more subtle".
Sometimes,
Re:Ahem... (Score:3, Funny)
I must agree with Winston Churchill: that is a practice up with which I will not put.
Good vocabulary != Good writing (Score:3, Interesting)
I prefer to create an effect through content, rather than presentation.
It'
Simply Not True! (Score:2, Interesting)
http://www.moderndemagogue.com/index.php?/archives
The introductory paragraph: Non-verbal communication is undeniably a core part of human interaction. The slightest nod of the head, blink of an eyelid, or ill-time
It's the writing... (Score:2)
Written language - the ones I'm familiar with, anyway - contains plenty of constructions for getting just about any meaning across, when used properly.
Of course, there are also problems on the reader's end. Many people aren't readers - they don't read for pleasure, don't read newspapers, and don't read for professional purposes.
Nothing Wrong with E-mail (Score:3, Interesting)
The conclusions shown in the summary are given as causes of the misunderstandings (anecodotal and experimental) in TFA. I disagree somewhat. Though it is in the main logical to conclude that the problem lies in e-mail not properly conveying all the nuances of human verbal communication, I think the problem is more with the people than inherent limitations in the medium -- in other words, we have to mature into e-mail, it doesn't need to expand for us.*
* The article itself basically confirms this by using extant prejudices and other such things as examples of how miscommunications occur -- these are things that we have to work to eliminate, not treat as givens and create solutions around!
Mistaking the Medium (Score:2)
Re:Mistaking the Medium (Score:2)
Agreed. People in businesses seem to think of e-mail as somewhere between an informal phone call and a Post-It note in terms of importance, which is really the only reason they have these problems.
Anything will be misinterpreted! (Score:2)
One thing I find that helps is mroe lines per screen. It helps keep the whole thing in prespective, and not jump to immediate conclusions while looking to scroll. A second thing that helps is the use of emoticons [smileys]. When I first saw'em, I thought they
Two other things missing - context and replies (Score:2, Interesting)
1. Context - frequently, someone sends off an email, but the subject line references some other topic - they replied to you and changed the topic, but did not change the subject line Re: UDS Extract 1.2 forms to what it should be Kramer SNP Project Request, or they bury the context change in the middle of the text without warning - starting with one topic thanks for fixing the fo
Different medium, same problem (Score:2)
How is this much different from getting a letter via snail mail? Same thing: if you know someone, you can interpret what they're writing; if you don't know them, it's much harder.
And even in a medium where you can hear or see the person, they can still deceive you or you can misinterpret their facial expressions. Communications between two or more people is not something cut-and-dried.
lacks expression (Score:2)
That hasn't been much of a problem for some hundred years of mailing. Writing is not a lesser form of communication, it's just different. With enough practice, one can make oneself understood, the way one wants to be understood, not just saying something and hoping the target will be on the same frequency
Re:lacks expression (Score:2)
Sign Language (Score:2)
I am currently taking a class in American Sign Language.
They use a surprising number of facial cues to go with the hand signing. For example furrowed eye brows for an open-ended question. This is on top of the regular body langauge, which we are encouraged to include.
This helps to deal with the lack of voice tone.
As someone that has unintentinoally come off sounding abrasive via email, I think that the real problem is the speed (as mentioned in the article). O
The 5 rules of e-mail (Score:5, Insightful)
Why Grammars are Abused [on slashdot] (Score:2)
Email, like mail, is a mass noun. You send people email.
The word you're looking for "email messages". Or just "messages".
I always thought it was because... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:ummm (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Hmmm... (Score:2)
Don't judge it based on its name - it's a great site.
Re:Hmmm... (Score:2)
From what I've read, the Christian Science Monitor is a very good newspaper with very little christian bias.
Re:Hmmm... (Score:3, Informative)
Re:Good punctuation and proper use of capitals, to (Score:2)