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Some Geek Guides for Dating 664

An anonymous reader sends in this: "In honor of upcoming V-day, here are some geek guides for help in finding your geeky match: Guy's Guide to Geek Girls, Girl's Guide to Geek Guys, advice from a she-geek, Engineer Your Love Life and Bart's Dating Guide for Geeks. And for those of you who are absolutely hopeless, well, there is always Coincidence Designs... It's not too late, so good luck!" Another reader has some good news: "An article in Discover magazine reports on research done by scientists at the University of Toronto about how males attract mates. The cited article claims that when males are young, the show offs are actually the ones who are least likely to succeed later on. This causes a "revenge of the nerds effect:" the football players burn out but the nerds become sexy!" And if all else fails, you can try a Valentine's Day Form Letter.
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Some Geek Guides for Dating

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  • by FraggleMI ( 117868 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:02PM (#5303482) Homepage
    Girl's Guide to Geek Guys link is broken
    • by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:28PM (#5303765)
      Maybe it was Slashdotted by all the girls out there trying to figure out how to snag that geek in their life ...

      Back to dreaming ...
    • That's what I thought this said at first.

      I was hoping to read about wooing her with olive oil, feta cheese, some lamb, wine, and then settling down for a night of... um... back door action.

      Geek guide to dating? Couldn't be as much fun.

  • by rastachops ( 543268 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:02PM (#5303484)
    Google and review sites are ll that I need to direct me towards my true love...
    PC Hardware

  • by Exiler ( 589908 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:04PM (#5303491)
    that this is indeed the bottom of the barrel, I'm having a hard time imagining a worse article.
    • by TopShelf ( 92521 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:13PM (#5303607) Homepage Journal
      Just wait for Arbor Day, and "the Geeks Guide to Getting Some Fresh Air."
    • methinks you have no date tonight

    • by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:25PM (#5303726)
      I'm having a hard time imagining a worse article

      What about tomorrows duplicate of it?
  • by Reedo ( 234996 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:04PM (#5303497)
    Here's another article in honor of Valentine's Day - A guide on how to get your Valentine hooked on gaming!
  • by ackthpt ( 218170 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:06PM (#5303524) Homepage Journal
    It's bad enough that it's Valentine's day, but why torment me by reminding me I haven't got a date, I ain't likely to get a date and I'm most likely to just go home tonight, eat a bowl of porridge and have those damn spirits visit me again...

    oh, wait, that's the other holiday.

  • by WinDoze ( 52234 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:06PM (#5303529)
    Get yourself a subscription to The Spice Channel and a 12 pack. It's about as close as you need to get. I know what I'm talking about here, I'm married and it's Valentine's Day and I'm going to go broke before the day is over.
  • by JJAnon ( 180699 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:06PM (#5303530)
    here []
    • by pyrros ( 324803 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:32PM (#5303806)
      >Google cache of the Girl's Guide to Geek guys

      Yeah, like a girl's guide to geek guys is going to get slashdotted.
    • by syle ( 638903 ) <> on Friday February 14, 2003 @03:00PM (#5304039) Homepage
      Admittedly, I only read through the first 4 or 5 paragraphs of this "article", but I can hardly believe the strange combination of nonsense, myth, and rumor that it's propogating.

      I'm a geek. I'll happily admit it. I have a degree in CS with a math minor, I do software development for a living, I've got a lot of karma, and I know how to view slashdot from my mobile phone.

      1. Where to find geeks: "discussing the latest hardware revolution or perfecting their Bill Gates impressions" Impressions? Bzzt. Try the bookstore, the person with the laptop at the park, the mall (arcade, or elsewhere. Geeks wear clothes too).

      2. "If you're not up on your Star Trek, you can forget about getting or keeping a geek dude." At this point, they are just propogating stereotypes. I've watched Star Trek in my day, but not to extremes, and most of my geek friends aren't extremely into it either. Regardless, we aren't so closed-minded that being a ST:TNG fanatic is on our list of requirements of a women.

      3. "Geeks tend towards packaged, junk foods since they prefer to work and think and aren't all that into cooking for themselves." This is probably the first true thing for the most part, but remember, cooking is a whole other kind of geekiness and some of us love it as well. See: Alton Brown, and fascination therewith.

      The rest of the article doesn't get much better. Honestly, after reading this kind of manure, why would a women be interested in a geek at all?
      • Poppy cock. I've never met a geek worth his salt that wasn't quite at home with the pots and pan, *particularly* the wok.

        There is some truth to the matter that when they are *working* and *single* they're more inclined to think than cook, but when involved in a relationship they aren't just cooking for *themselves.* So in that respect along their might be some truth to it.

        I find that your "but" is far closer to the truth than the article is.

        I'm the chef in my house, and I've earned that right and responsibility by merit. My stir-fryed random alone would make the Iron Chef blush in shame.

        And I'm damned proud of it.

      • by JJ22 ( 558624 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @05:05PM (#5305229)
        why would a women be interested in a geek at all?

        The article gives five reasons -

        They are generally available.

        Other women will tend not to steal them.

        They can fix things.

        Your parents will love them.

        They're smart.

        The key is the second one... I've discovered recently (after spending 18 months dating online) that after women get out of their high school years, they've usually been burned a few times by guys, and often start to look for the guys who aren't in demand (or aren't able to attract serious competition). These are generally women who are good looking but not stunning, who've been able to attract guys in the past but not keep them, and wind up with low self-esteem.

        So they go for someone "safe", who will eventually find out he's being used as a security blanket, and if he's got any cojones he'll boot her to the curb the way she deserves.

        Grin. If you're desperate, keep an eye out for the ones with the footprint on their cute little a$$.

    • "If you're not up on your Star Trek, you can forget about getting or keeping a geek dude."

      Um, no...because as we all know, B5 is FAR superior to Star Trek.


  • by Anonvmous Coward ( 589068 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:08PM (#5303546)
    ... so I can weed out the unattractive women that will soon start calling me.
  • by teamhasnoi ( 554944 ) <.teamhasnoi. .at.> on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:08PM (#5303549) Journal
    You know the scientist guy on 'The Simpsons' that sounds like Jerry Lewis?

    Watch him carefully, and do the exact opposite.

    That means: Never ever EVER say, "Nice LAAAYdeeee, oh! with the pushing, and the shoving, I can't help but notice your eyes, nice EYYYYeeees, are glowing like the blinkenlights on my fileserver, in the mother's basement, LAAAAYdeeee...oh MY!"

  • by smd4985 ( 203677 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:09PM (#5303556) Homepage
    i need to worry more about getting a date than getting moderator poins for slashdot :) .
  • poll... (Score:3, Interesting)

    by jeffy124 ( 453342 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:09PM (#5303558) Homepage Journal
    I attempted to submit a poll for today..

    Your gift for V-Day?
    • Roses/Flowers
    • Box of chocolates
    • Card
    • Dinner & Movie
    • Jewelry
    • I dont have a significant other, you insensitive clod!
    • Weekend stay at Resort de CowboyNeal

    Sent it in last night -- rejected.
    • Roses/Flowers

      Box of chocolates


      Dinner & Movie


      I dont have a significant other, you insensitive clod!

      Weekend stay at Resort de CowboyNeal

      Should have been posted .... except maybe you should have changed

      Weekend stay at Resort de CowboyNeal

      to just:


      Would have been a bit funnier .... and CowboyNeal may have gotten some free action too!!!
  • Homophobia (Score:2, Insightful)

    by Anonymous Coward
    Of course, it would never occur to anybody that there might be a need for A Geek Guy's Guide to Geek Guys or A Geek Girl's Guide to Geek Girls, would it? Of course not.
    • by Anonymous Coward
      In my experience all the geek girls are already shagging all the other geek girls.

      Or maybe they were telling me this to distract me while they ran screaming. I can never tell for sure.
    • Feh (Score:2, Insightful)

      by Anonymous Coward
      Same principles of Open Source apply: if you need it, and it isn't available, write it yourself.

      And just how the hell is it homophobia? Do you *want* a hetero to write a homo version of a Guide, even though they're not gonna know what the hell they're talking about?

      The only people to blame for the lack of homosexual geek guides are the homosexuals who haven't written them yet.
    • by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @06:07PM (#5305749)
      Guy's Guide to Geek Guys

      There isn't really much of a "gay geek guide", so I figured I might just as well start one. Besides, it's Friday afternoon and I don't feel like doing any work. :) Alas, this isn't a *guide* yet. Just a version 0.1 of what may become a guide one day. Maybe. :)

      On to the subject.

      What do non-geek guys need to know? The most important bit is that geek guys are, well, geeky. :) They are a subculture distinct from the rest of the population, whether gay or straight. They tend to be very smart, interesting, and very idiosyncratic.

      Physical appearance is usually of secondary importance to gay geeks, although not as much as one may suspect. The geek culture usually views appearance as secondary to intellectual prowess - which leads to an interesting clash of cultures. Gay geeks may think that taking care to look good is beneath them - but nevertheless pay attention to how others present themselves. Just don't point this out to them - they'll immediately deny it. :)

      Participation in sports is usually right out. There is a contingent of sporty geeks, but even they tend towards non-contact, non-confrontational sports, such as frisbee or cycling. Many geeks are altogether aphysical.

      Social contact is notoriously a stumbling block, but usually not as bad as in the case of straight geeks. Our playing field is much more level - let's face it, we're all guys, we're really rather straightforward (ahem, gayforward? :). Still, geeks tend to be less extraverted and more shy than non-geeks. This means they might prefer to stay home rather than go to a club - so you're less likely to run into them in bars - and it may be difficult to convince one to go out.

      Not surprisingly, gay geeks tend toward the introverted, analytic type. They make great intellectual partners - they tend to be well-read, have broad knowledge as well as many areas of expertise, and can be surprisingly cultured. Intellectual nimbleness is highly valued, and even their sense of humor tends towards the analytic and absurd - which can be good or bad, depending on how far it's taken. :)

      Though there are many types of geek, computer geeks in particular will spend a lot of time exploring computer systems. The machine is for them both something to play with and something to learn about - and they greatly enjoy both activities. They will also often enjoy 'geeking out' - talking shop with other geeks. Don't try to stop them, it's impossible. Just take comfort knowing that after half-an-hour or so, after they've finished geeking out about the latest operating system thingamajigs or what have you, they'll be more than happy to come back to earth and talk about normal things again.

      More often than not, they'll instinctively tend to analyze everything, and act in thought-out ways. It's rare for them to be extemporaneous and wild - that mode of behavior is contrary to what they value. Very few gay geeks are also drama queens. So know what you're going in for. :)

      Geeks and gays both build very idiosyncratic subcultures, with very distinct values and ways of communication. This usually means gay geeks are doubly idiosyncratic. :) They are keenly aware of the different value systems the two cultures represent (especially when they're mutually contradictory), and go to great lengths to project their membership and independence of both groups, often simultaneously.

      On the plus side, gay geeks are usually much more conscious of their quirks than straight geeks or gay non-geeks. They realize some of their fascinations, their anime, sci-fi, computer games, or what have you, are just ways of asserting individual difference - and they derive much of the pleasure from this separation. Don't expect them to want to conform to any popular mold.


      This work is hereby donated to the public domain. Do what you want with it.

  • And theres nothing like a good old how-to-get-a-geek-to-date-someone guide on valentines day. However, part of the we-dont-want-to-go-out-with-geeks rebellion posted the sites on slashdot so they would not exist for the day in question so they can avoid the most godawful chat up lines in the pub tonight. Happy valentines day :)
  • by Mullen ( 14656 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:09PM (#5303565)
    Here is a big helpful hint; get up, take a shower and go outside and meet some girls (Or guys)!

    Contrary to what some people on Slashdot say, they won't come to you.
  • Dating tips (Score:5, Funny)

    by sbryant ( 93075 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:10PM (#5303569)

    Always use the format YYYY-MM-DD as this causes the least confusion. It's sortable too, and it's even an ISO standard!

    Oh, wait.. not that kind of date....


  • This is useful information (goodness knows I'll be putting it to work soon!), and Slashdot is certainly a good place to post it. However, I'm concerned that perhaps publishing this kind of material could be counterproductive, both for "geeks" and for mankind.

    One aspect of geekiness has always been a lack of connection with other people. This emotional chasm is what has driven many of the Great Geeks (Einstein, Feynman, et al) to pour their energy into invention and genius. Geeks are thus given a choice, between intellectual pursuits and the attempt to integrate themselves with normal society. There should be no shortcuts, or we risk losing future geniuses to the normal life.

    Also, the human race is kept strong is through evolution. If asthmatic, neurotic geeks improve their chances in the great slot machine of life, then future generations may be cursed with poorer health and social skills (which are essential to proper child-rearing), a state that will only be perpetuated and intensified in generations to come. Geeks need to be at a sexual disadvantage to temper their intellectual superiority, lest we introduce imbalance to the human race.

    Geek guides for dating could be a powerful weapon against the Dark Lord in the East.
    • Re:misguided (Score:3, Informative)

      This emotional chasm is what has driven many of the Great Geeks (Einstein, Feynman, et al) to pour their energy into invention and genius.

      Survey says, "Bzzt!" Thank you for playing.

      Feynman had great connections with other people. Read up on him. He was not only a brilliant physicist, he was also a popular teacher. Part of the joy of figuring things out was helping other people understand his insights.

      It's true he was deeply affected by the death of his wife Arline. Even after that, though, he often went to places where he could be surrounded by other people. He played drums in a band!

      Hardly the emotional chasm you mention.
    • Re:misguided (Score:3, Informative)

      by Guppy06 ( 410832 )
      "One aspect of geekiness has always been a lack of connection with other people. This emotional chasm is what has driven many of the Great Geeks (Einstein, Feynman, et al) to pour their energy into invention and genius."

      You realize, of course, that you just listed two married men in your "support" of your argument...
  • Coincidence Design (Score:3, Insightful)

    by rbolkey ( 74093 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:10PM (#5303574)
    Alright. Add one more reason why am glad I am not a woman. My gosh. How do you end up explaining this to her once it gets to a level you need to come clean. How could you still cover this up when you're married and not feel a bit sketchy.
    • by Dirtside ( 91468 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:54PM (#5303995) Journal
      Coincidence Design is [] a hoax []. Research, people! It takes all of two minutes.
    • Typical patron of Coincidence Design's plan for how this will all work out:

      Him (smoking cigarette after sex in backseat of car): Honey, we've been together for a few hours now, and I really really like you. I need to come clean about this - it's been eating at me and I can't handle the dishonesty anymore.

      Her: What is it, love?

      Him: You know how I met you on the side of the road with the tire on your car shot out by some psychopath, and I gave you a ride to this park?

      Her: Yes --?

      Him: The whole thing was a sham. I had it engineered by Coincidence Designs.

      Her: That means -- ?

      Him: Yes.

      Her: You spent $80,000 dollars for a chance to get me in the sack?

      (He looks sheepish)

      Her: Honey, that's the most romantic thing I've ever heard! I love you! You're such a stallion! Let's get married!
  • by faeryman ( 191366 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:12PM (#5303594) Homepage
    Screw Valentine's Day. [] Get back at your ex :(

  • Of course now they call it stalking. It can get pretty lonely in the bushes.
  • by SquadBoy ( 167263 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:21PM (#5303678) Homepage Journal
    1. Trek is just bad and has only gotten worse. Good SF OTHO is the key. Read up on your Niven.

    2. Cuisine just wrong. Most geeks I know cook. Ever wonder why our man Alton ( did a /. interview. Because cooking is a *very* geeky thing.

    3. MYST!!! What the fuck is this bitch going on about. In general any geek worth having is going to be too busy working to play games and when we are working we would like to be left alone. Just be understanding that sometimes we need some time to work and support that.

    So in conclusion this piece was insutling and wrong. BTW my wife is perfect. :)
  • Remember (Score:5, Funny)

    by sielwolf ( 246764 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:21PM (#5303686) Homepage Journal
    Pr0n never asks you to say sorry.

    Or heroin for that matter!
  • by mao che minh ( 611166 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:21PM (#5303688) Journal
    I'm not the sexiest guy on the planet, but ever since I was 5 or 6 I never had problems with the opposite sex. Hell, all I really remember from high school is that my "count" (how many chicks I nailed throughout my 4 years of high school) broke 20 during the first week of senior year. Just reading the first couple paragraphs of the "Geek girl" article made me feel suddenly sorry for all those geeks out there just can't balance an intense interest in electronics and/or computing with basic social interaction.

    Don't settle on an ugly chick. Hot chicks will lay down with just about anything during high school and college, too.

  • by Niles_Stonne ( 105949 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:24PM (#5303714) Homepage

    SWM with Mod Points, willing to trade with SWF interested in /., computers, and role playing.

  • by oliverthered ( 187439 ) <oliverthered@h[ ] ['otm' in gap]> on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:26PM (#5303739) Journal
    Being a geek, I'm sure you know how hard it is to remember peoples names, with your head stuffed full of all that stuff you have to remeber for work.

    It can be a bit embarising, if, after going out for a couple of weeks you still forget you girls name.

    So, my tips is; always date girls with the same name. (this is also handy if your seeing more than one at once).
  • by Ars-Fartsica ( 166957 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:29PM (#5303770)
  • by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:29PM (#5303776)
    I tried to ask someone I know for a date, but she's been slashdotted.
  • by WebMasterP ( 642061 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:29PM (#5303779) Homepage
    They got web pages for this stuff now? Whatever happened to `man getagirl`
  • Mirror URLs (Score:4, Informative)

    by sabat ( 23293 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:30PM (#5303785) Journal

    The legendary "Girl's Guide to Geek Guys" by Mikki Halpin (and originally published in Bunnyhop, a great 'zine) is slashdotted at, apparently.

    The Google cache is here []

    Some more mirrors are here [], and here at XS4ALL in Holland [].

    And btw, one of the pages mentions that Mikki has written a book based on the article. The book is available on the Evil Patenting [].

  • by airrage ( 514164 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:31PM (#5303798) Homepage Journal
    I don't care who your girlfriend is, getting her a mouse pad for Valentine's Day, or any other affectionate-laden holiday is a bad, bad, idea. And when I mean bad, I mean real wrath of God type stuff: fire and brimstone coming down from the skies, rivers and sea's boiling, 40 years of darkness, earthquakes, volcanoes, the dead rising from the grave, human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!

    So gentlemen, buy flowers, keep your balls.
  • Upcoming? (Score:3, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:33PM (#5303807)
    Posted at 1pm, on Feb 14th, and it's upcoming? Well this explains why geeks can't get a date...
  • by dirkdidit ( 550955 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:36PM (#5303842) Homepage
    but try being born on this lovely holiday. Every year I hear the same thing, "Oh wow, you are so lucky to be born on such a romantic holiday." Uhh, right.
    • Okay, this is going to sound bad, but...

      I think the perfect situation for a guy would be if you met your girlfriend on valentine's day and it also happened to be her birthday. Now you can cover three events in one! (anniversary, birthday, valentine's day) And if you propose on that day, and get married on that day, you've got it made. I'm sure you're thinking.. "Well then I have to work three times as hard to please her!" Perhaps you will have to work harder, but I figure as long as you do more than her friend's boyfriend's do, you're golden. Even if you spend 3 times the cash, it will require not nearly as much planning and time. Perhaps some others are thinking "Well then I don't get 3 days with automatic sex." I say if you're not getting it regularily anyway, she doesn't deserve a damn thing.

      Call me cynical, cheap, evil.. whatever.. but I still say that'd be a sweet setup.

  • he cited article claims that when males are young, the show offs are actually the ones who are least likely to succeed later on. This causes a "revenge of the nerds effect:" the football players burn out but the nerds become sexy!"

    Yes, but in Darwinian evolution, it doesn't matter when you get laid, it just matters that you get laid. In fact, gettin' it on, earlier in life, technically makes you more reproductively successful because any number of things could cause your early demise, the earlier onset of sexual activity would (assuming a condom-less world) pass on your genetic material to the next generation before the opportunity for premature death to occur.

    Although it is an interesting fact. And in modern society, where human mating isn't random, etc. Its probably a good sign for the future of our species. I seem to recall reading about another study that showed an inverse relationship between the IQ of an individual and the age at which they first engaged in sexual activity. So if you are a 30 year old virgin, rejoice, and join Mensa []!
  • by SWPadnos ( 191329 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:46PM (#5303935)
    Geek's Guide to Dating:

    Step 1: Find member of opposite sex.
    Step 2: ???
    Step 3: Date!
  • by Pollux ( 102520 ) <speter&tedata,net,eg> on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:47PM (#5303939) Journal
    And for those of you who are absolutely hopeless, well, there is always Coincidence Designs...

    I've already gotten 12 emails from gals today who want to meet me at their website and make hot love to me! I don't need any guides to dating...I'm a chic magnet!

  • by Carnage4Life ( 106069 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @02:50PM (#5303966) Homepage Journal
    ESR's site is down but I found a mirror Probably the most unintentionally funny thing ESR has ever written.
  • by GooseKirk ( 60689 ) <`goosekirk' `at' `'> on Friday February 14, 2003 @03:02PM (#5304055) Homepage
    Bah, humbug. You lot can go on with your foolish optimism, your hopeful enthusiasm, and your boundless love... I have BETTER things to do this Valentine's Day! Like:

    - Trying not to weep openly in public

    - Trying not to think about all the great sex my ex-girlfriends must be having right now

    - Stockpiling cheap hooch, 'cause once you get started, it can be tough to find the booze store when you need more

    - Finding a comfortable, out-of-the-way gutter

    - Maybe looking into that heroin addiction idea I've been kicking around

    - Harshly silencing those dopey "friends" who always want to "help," as if I have some kind of "problem"

    - Pondering a little private self-love, if you know what I mean, but realizing my self-loathing will just shoot me down, anyway

    Yes, that's the glorious Valentine's Day I've got planned so far... anyone else have ideas?
    • I'm getting a good start in replying to as many /. messages as possble.

      Instead of weeping in public I'm weeping on the dog, who cares. Or rather the dog thinks that if god wants to weep over hime, than god should. (every geek should own a dog to treat them like god)

      The cat on the other hand thinks that my tears are fun to bat off my face. (Every geek should have a cat to prove the dog wrong)

      I think I will go to bed early. Any girls I've met who are worth my time have forgotten I exist (if they still exist isn't sure either), but I can perhaps dream of them. Dreams have a major advantage. The cute nice girls like me in the dreams, and they don't have any overwhelming bad qualities that I can't stand.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @03:22PM (#5304268)
    that eventually succeeded, and now has a happy relationship with a nice (and -very- hot) woman.

    1- Never ever show that you need a mate; if she approaches you it's because she needs you, not the other way around.

    2- Being not good looking of course doesn't help when you look for "a girl a nite", but it's damn useful to find the right one to spend your life with.

    3- There aren't clever but ugly OR damn-hot but stupid girls. One of the prettiest girls I've ever met was a computer programmer; the ugliest one was stupid as a brick.

    4- Stop looking for a mate. -I'm serious- You'll find one when you'll stop searching. Focus your interests on something else and do it; don't let the lack of sex drive you crazy or you can be damn sure that no girl in the world will be interested in you.

    It worked for me.
    Just my .2 c.

  • by obi1one ( 524241 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @03:26PM (#5304313)
    So if i meet a nice girl, and Im a little shy i leave her flowers with a note. but do i sign the note 'your secret admirer' or 'an anonymous coward'?
  • by 13Echo ( 209846 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @03:48PM (#5304504) Homepage Journal
    "5. Every geek girl has had a crush on Han Solo or Luke Skywalker. Most of us, both. Many of us still do, secretly."

    My girlfriend had a crush on Optimus Prime when she was young.

  • by frankie ( 91710 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @03:59PM (#5304606) Journal
    <div class="gloat" style="smug">

    For the official record, my wife is fun, smart, sexy, and:

    1. She was pissed about a co-worker [] sneaking on to her lab computer to read his Hotmail, so she set up a Hosts file that blocks Passport.
    2. She bought me an RJ45 crimping kit for my birthday last year, and she has borrowed it from me for her own use more than once.
    3. The year before that she got me a Victorinox CyberTool.
    4. She has written a LISP parser and a C garbage collector ( CS51 [], as an elective no less)

    Sure, I have to spend a couple hundred bucks a year on Valentines and our Anniversary, but it's way cheaper than a couple nights at a titty bar or whatever you poor schmucks have to do. More importantly, it's a shared bank account and she makes more than I do. Bwa ha ha!

  • by JWhitlock ( 201845 ) <> on Friday February 14, 2003 @04:11PM (#5304710)
    Some have suggested that the formula for Valentine's Day gifts is:

    R = P / M

    where R is the romantic level, P is price, and M is mass. This seems to work in some cases: when flowers are the same mass, the ones that cost more are more romantic. Ditto for wine. Diamonds are light and pricey, and thus even more romantic than flowers. However, RAM, no matter what the bus speed, has not been found to be romantic. This has led some to propose the formula:

    R = P / (M * U)

    where U is utility - thus, the more useful it is, the less romantic it is. Mathemeticians are still applying this formula in the field, looking for counter-examples and debating the consequences.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 14, 2003 @04:31PM (#5304935)
    These are the two very different goals that guys have when meeting women. Many (most?) "geek" guys are more interested in having a relationship. A good one may include the other part anyway. ;-) Most "normal" guys are more interested in getting laid, with as many women as possible. In most cases, these two goals are mutually exclusive. So, you face a choice.

    If you want to get laid as much as possible, follow the advice of the Tom Leykis [] radio show. Be a jerk. Don't call her back. Tell her you'll call on Monday, then don't call til Thursday. Don't spend money on her -- make her pay (say you forgot your wallet, etc). Don't be available when she wants to go out, make her think you have more important things (or women) to do than her. For the type of woman who will screw anything that moves, this will only make her want you more. Go out on a Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. Don't go out on Friday or Saturday unless it's a guaranteed lay - remember you want her thinking you're doing something even more fun without her.

    This stuff works, as long as you're willing to do hot chicks who've done dozens (if not hundreds) of other guys before you. A great little trick they've been talking about on the show lately is to make up fake ATM receipts with large account balances. This should be easy for the geeks - just scan your receipt, edit in gimp to give yourself a 6 figure balance, and print. Crumple it up a little to make it nice and believable. Then talk to some hot chick, tell her you have to go to some important meeting but give her your phone number and write it on that ATM receipt. She will call and you will get laid.

    Now, let's face it. Many of us geeks are nice guys and just don't have the balls to do stuff like the above. We don't get laid by chicks like that - not because of our looks, but because we treat them nicely (oh, he's so nice -- and boring!!). But for many of us (myself included), that's ok - we'd rather run nothing but Windows 2.0 than have anything to do with those brainless dopey chicks who put out on command. I mean, come on -- ewww! Do you know what (or how many different... 'things') have been in that? No thank you! Have some self respect, lady!

    For those of us in this group, we want a real relationship, with a lady who has a brain. I'm proud to say that I found one, without being a jerk, and ended up marrying her. I'm totally shy and awkward, with no confidence in social situations. So what worked? Personals.

    Many people still look at personal ads with a stigma -- "Oh, he couldn't get a date so he had to resort to THAT! What a loser!" But screw them. It's practically the perfect way to find the right person, not just someone who's ok. Find out about the other person before wasting time or investing a lot of emotion into it. Search, wait, and hold out for that perfect gal (or guy).

    Personally, I used Yahoo! Personals, about 4 years ago, back when it was still free. I responded to about 2 ads a week - some went as far as phone calls, some even went to a dinner date after several emails and phone calls. None went farther because none of these women felt "right." I never felt totally comfortable. That's ok, though. Nobody needs to be in a rush for this stuff!

    Finally I posted my own ad and got 2 responses. One was thousands of miles away looking for a penpal. Ok, whatever. The other started emailing back and forth and then we started calling each other. The first night we talked for 4 hours on the phone. I never do that, much less with someone I've only emailed for a week. Needless to say, it was a sign that she was "the one." I felt totally comfortable on our first date (SW Episode 1 -- the movie sucked but the date rocked!). We just belonged together. 3 years later we were married.

    So, you see, I am a big proponent of personals if you want to find that special someone. It worked beautifully for me, though that's no guarantee for anyone else. Relationships are a lot of work, no doubt about that - but what you get out of it is much more than you put in (and much more satisfying on all levels than the guys above who are just getting laid with a bunch of skanks -- but hey, if that's your thing, great! Have fun!).

    Unfortunately most of the sites now require payment. That sucks but totally understandable. I don't know if I would have met my wife if one (or both) of us had had to pay. There's no guarantee that you'll get anything out of any one ad, so it's a crapshoot, with pretty poor odds. For geeks, though, I can recommend Peer2Peer [] which is made only for geeks. I believe it's still free, but it's been some time since I looked at it.

    Anyway, good luck, be smart, and have fun -- whether you choose option #1 or #2, they're both ok as long as it's right for you!
  • by Dolemite_the_Wiz ( 618862 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @04:46PM (#5305084) Journal

    I live in Seattle and this town is probably one of the worst towns in the US (Next to Silicon Valley) to be a single guy in.

    Bars are never an option due to the fact that the majority of women are literally afraid of being 'hit on' or some other personality issue (usually because they didn't get that pony from daddy on their 16th birthday or someting like that).

    I've also found (IMO) that attitudes on Dating/picking up women vary from City to City.

    In Vancouver B.C., people love to go out and have fun. This is a great place to go meet down to earth women.

    In San Fanciscisco, women are approachable but they like to get to know you for a bit and then go from there.

    London is like Vancouver but magnified by 10 when it comes to living life and having fun.

    I explored many options and have found some things that work:

    1)Take Group Dance lessons. Salsa, Swing, whatever. In most dance studios you have to switch partners throughout the class and you can talk/flirt during the lessons.

    2)Go to public bars or places that offer formal dancing (salsa and swing especially). Women who go to most of these places in Seattle are going to dance or have fun. These places are great if you want to get to know someone without the bar 'stigma' of one night stands or geting shot down in flames. Also, a great icebreaker, while dancing, is telling them that you're learning how to dance. Women will eat that up.

    Take classes in non-technical topics you want to learn about. This is a great way, in the very least, to meet people who share the same interest as you

    (side note the 'gold digger' types of women don't tend to frequent these places)

    I've never tried a dating service or enlisted 'professional' services. However, I've seen friends who have used dating services and the toughest part of Dating services is writing your 'about me' section and what picture you use. (Make the picture a good one. Even if you have to use Photoshop/The Gimp..just kidding).

    The main problem with witing your bio are the differences in writing and creativity of men Vs. women. In the Seattle area publicaion, the Stranger, check out the differnce in writing styles of the 'Men Seeking Women' and 'Women seeking Men' sections []. (side note: This link may be busy or down today due to the Stranger's publicaion of free valentines ads/love notes on a different part of this site)

    See how the 'Men seeking ads are so bland and the 'Women seeking are much more creative? You gotta put some serious work in the bio to get noticed. You gotta find a way to show how you stick out amongst all the other candidates.

    Keep in mind, just because you may get shot down, it's not your fault. It's something with them. Also, just because you may not have a connection with a woman you meet, don't burn bridges. She may very well have a single friend(s) for you to meet. I've definitely hooked up in this manner before

    Finally, (and this is the most important one) don't, under any circumstances, regress into techno-babble mode for the non-technical type women. Just say you play with computers all day and leave it at that. Once you're seriously dating, then resume the techno-babbble.


  • by BMonger ( 68213 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @04:52PM (#5305129)
    And in the event that you've been given the honor of taking a lady out... you might need this... []
  • by geekoid ( 135745 ) <dadinportland&yahoo,com> on Friday February 14, 2003 @05:28PM (#5305435) Homepage Journal
    About 15 yars ago, me and some friends were going out to a movie. As we were leaving the building I asked a woman(whom I had never seen before) that happened to be going out the same door if she wanted to join us for a movie, she said yes. we were marrid 18 months later.

    Now in my case I'm sure it was my incredible charisma, good looks, intellect, and my mad spelling skillz, that won her over(yeah, right).
    The point is ask. you will most likely be reject, but you might not. It seems to me, most geek need some thicker skin, and the ability to relize you can't controll the enviroment you live in like you do the enviroment on your computer.
  • MIRRORS THAT WORK (Score:3, Informative)

    by AyeRoxor! ( 471669 ) on Friday February 14, 2003 @05:28PM (#5305449) Journal
    Some links are broken, some are just too darn slow. Hope these help:
    (thanks, and google!)

    A Girl's Guide to Geek Guys []
    Bart's Dating Guide for Geeks []

"The following is not for the weak of heart or Fundamentalists." -- Dave Barry