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Toys

Buy Your Own Aircraft Carrier 518

Posted by michael from the you-know-you've-always-wanted-one dept.
Vodalian writes "Distinction as the last surviving Aircraft Carrier built in England for WW II and commissioned as the HMS Vengeance in late 1944, this unique vessel served the British then the Australian Navy as HMAS Vengeance prior to her sale to Brazil In 1956. Undergoing reconstruction and overhaul in Rotterdam from 1957 to 1960 she was commissioned as the Minas Gerais in December of that year. During her service with the Brazilian Navy she was overhauled from 1976 to 1980 completing a 5-year refit in 1981. She was decommissioned on the 16th of October 2001 and is currently for sale."
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Buy Your Own Aircraft Carrier More

Buy Your Own Aircraft Carrier

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  • Build your own aircraft carrier... (Score:5, Funny)

    by TheMidget ( 512188 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:42PM (#6085999)
    ... and whack those crazy Merkins and their DMCA laws with it! We want a free Europe!!!!

    Frist Psot?

    • The rumour that this CV has already been secretly bought by the RIAA for an unspecified "future project" is probably no more than that: an unsubstantiated rumour... ("...Tomorrow the World!!!")

  • build or buy ? (Score:5, Funny)

    by Spacelord ( 27899 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:42PM (#6086000)
    For a second I thought it said *build* your own aircraft carrier .... now that would have been a feat :)
    • Well, considering some of the other stories [slashdot.org] on slashdot, you never know.

    • Aircraft carrier HOWTOs (Score:5, Funny)

      by Anonymous Coward on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:14PM (#6086157)
      How to build an aircraft carrier:
      1. Acquire necessary parts and materials.
      2. Assemble.
      How to turn any boat into an aircraft carrier:
      1. Place aircraft on boat.
      How to sink an aircraft carrier:
      1. Make its average density greater than water.

      • Less Dense Water: the Bermuda Triangle (Score:5, Interesting)

        by handy_vandal ( 606174 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @07:45PM (#6087334) Homepage Journal
        How to sink an aircraft carrier:
        Make its average density greater than water.

        Alternately, make the water less dense:
        A British scientist
        claims [skeptics.com.au] to have solved the mystery of the Bermuda Triangle - and says the explanation could fix the world's energy problems.

        Geologist Dr Ben Clennell told a conference that the phenomenon where planes, ships and people have vanished was caused by giant gas bubbles.

        The gas bubbles resulted from underwater landslides releasing frozen methane gas which had built up over millennia. The methane ice "gas hydrate" was produced by deep-sea bacteria feeding beneath the ocean bed.

        The effect of these apple-sized bubbles rising to the surface could be disastrous because the release of a large quantity of methane would reduce the density of seawater.

        Search Google [google.com]

    • Re:build or buy ? (Score:5, Interesting)

      by meringuoid ( 568297 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:23PM (#6086211)
      Seriously, if you're a minor country 'build or buy' is a serious issue. Building a carrier is bloody expensive, but if you do so you give at least one of your port cities a major employment boost and at the end of it you get a shiny modern carrier. Buying someone else's cast-offs is far cheaper, but you'll have to accept that it's a fixer-upper and pay for refits and awful maintenance bills.

      The original owner of this carrier is currently starting work on two really _big_ carriers as part of a scheme to switch from a military geared to fight World War 3 on the Rhine to a highly mobile force capable of dropping in on people at short notice and spoiling their day. Consequently, three Falklands-vintage carriers will soon be on the market for any dictator on good enough terms with London... So if anyone's planning to buy this carrier, do remember that in a couple of years your neighbour could be planning to buy a whole fleet ;-)

      • Re:build or buy ? (Score:3, Interesting)

        by Guppy06 ( 410832 )
        "Building a carrier is bloody expensive,"

        Putting planes on it is even more expensive. Especially when you're talking about a flight deck dating from WWII. Unless you're planning to go back to piston-driven aircraft, this ship will more or less require either a major overhaul or a plane specifically built for it. Add in the cost for a shipload of AV8Bs and suddenly the price triples (at the very least).

        "Consequently, three Falklands-vintage carriers will soon be on the market for any dictator on good

  • Hmmm (Score:2, Funny)

    by PS-SCUD ( 601089 )
    It's just a guess, but I think you'd need something bigger than a creek to sail that in!

  • Put that baby on eBay !!! (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:44PM (#6086009)
    No reserve, I'll give em' $50 bucks. Buyer pays shipping

  • Bring idea! (Score:4, Funny)

    by chrisgeleven ( 514645 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:44PM (#6086010) Homepage
    Corporations this is your chance to become a world power by buying your very own aircraft carrier! Of course you have to fund the personnel to run the carrier and then get some fighter jets but imagine the countries you can frighten into accepting your tyrannical contracts!

    • Easier way (Score:5, Insightful)

      by Imperator ( 17614 ) <slashdot2@NOsPaM.omershenker.net> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:39PM (#6086285)
      Get your former CEO elected as Vice President of the United States.

    • Re:Bring idea! (Score:3, Interesting)

      by AlecC ( 512609 )
      See John Brunner's "Stand on Zanzibar" - an excellent book - in which something like this happened. A megacorp bought an aircraft carrier to use as a base for their take ove of "Beninia" - probably Gambia.
  • i can't even imagine what a nightmare it'd be getting that thing wired for cable...

  • Snowcrash (Score:2, Interesting)

    by kiltedtaco ( 213773 )
    Sounds like something right out of Snowcrash.
    • You could fit an entire city inside one of these things. With no airplanes the hangers would be friggin huge.

      Reminds me of a Macross story...
      • It's big, but not that big:
        • Length: 693' 3" Overall 630' Waterline
        • 690' Flight deck
        • Beam: 80' 119' 6" Flight deck
        • Draught: 23' Fore 23' 5" aft
        • Complement: 1300 (1000 Navy, 300 Air)
        • Hanger: 322' long by 52' Width by 17' 6" height
      • You're probably thinking of an American Nimitz-class nuclear carrier, with its 5 acres of deck space and 5,000 crew. This one is WWII-vintage, and not quite so large. It's actually quite small, by aircraft carrier standards.
    • I was thinking the same thing. People, please contribute to my paypal donation fund, as I really want to buy this thing! You'll be more than welcome to join me on her when we rechristen it Enterprise and start a floating city in the Pacific.

      • Then the /. headline... (Score:5, Funny)

        by SunPin ( 596554 ) <slashspam&cyberista,com> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @07:57PM (#6087375) Homepage
        Ask Slashdot: A few months ago, we discussed how to buy an aircraft carrier. After a hectic fundraising bid, me and all my "friends" were able to purchase the Brazilian sea whore through PayPal. I thought "Brazilian Sea Whore" was such a rad name that we rechristened it with the name. Unfortunately, now there's a problem. We ran out of food and the situation makes Lord of the Flies look like a comedy. A portion of the crew has broken off into a Klingon language faction and is proposing mutiny. We've descended into cannibalism but we're not sure how to decide who dies first in a fair way for everybody. So my question is this: what do you think about using /. ID numbers in descending order as a valid way of choosing who gets cooked next? While some of the lower ID numbers are pretty fat and would last for weeks, it's probably not a good idea as they would make ideal emergency rations. Not like we don't have an emergency already...

  • Perfect! (Score:5, Funny)

    by Judg3 ( 88435 ) <jeremy@@@pavleck...com> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:46PM (#6086025) Homepage Journal
    This goes along with my plans.
    1. Change name ti L. Bob Rife
    2. Create cable TV monopoly
    3. Start own religion
    4. Work on meta-virus
    5. Buy aircraft carrier
    6. Get residents of 3rd world country to do my bidding!

    Sweet!

    • Re:Perfect! (Score:5, Informative)

      by bolind ( 33496 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:16PM (#6086167) Homepage
      This goes along with my plans.
      1. Change name ti L. Bob Rife
      2. Create cable TV monopoly
      3. Start own religion
      4. Work on meta-virus
      5. Buy aircraft carrier
      6. Get residents of 3rd world country to do my bidding!


       To the people not getting the above reference, go read Neal Stephenson's "Snow Crash", in were a decommissioned aircraft carrier is the center of "The Raft", a shitload of floating things, well, floating around, with "refus" (refugees), waiting to get close enough to North America to get ashore to start a new life.
    • 7. ???
      8. Profit!

  • Hell of a dance floor (Score:4, Insightful)

    by jhines ( 82154 ) <john@jhines.org> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:47PM (#6086027) Homepage
    Great place to throw a party, cruise outside the reach of the law in internatinal waters.

    Hope the weather is good tho.

    • Re:Hell of a dance floor (Score:2, Funny)

      by Anonymous Coward
      See that ship over there? They're re-broadcasting Major League Baseball with implied oral consent, not express written consent -- or so the legend goes.

  • Slow day? (Score:4, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:47PM (#6086028)
    This article is proof that Saturday is always slow at the Slashdot office

  • Bass Boat (Score:2, Funny)

    by laosland ( 55769 )
    This would make one hell of a bass boat... Think of the size of the trolling motor you'd need.

  • Nice Price (Score:5, Insightful)

    by jspoon ( 585173 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:48PM (#6086039)
    $4.5 million sounds like a steal. It probably costs more than that to keep it in port for a year, let alone what it would actually cost to operate.

    • Re:Nice Price (Score:5, Insightful)

      by Chris Mattern ( 191822 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:29PM (#6086238)
      Which is why she's so cheap, of course. Massive operating costs make her a tough sell; there's probably nobody out there who will regard her as being worth the price it will take to run her. She's being sold for her scrap value, sad to say. Whoever buys her will undoubtedly break her up and sell the pieces.

      Chris Mattern
    • My brother-in-law was looking for a new fishing boat. I figure I'll tell him about it. He'd have room for lots of salmon on this baby.

  • offtopic, i know... (Score:5, Funny)

    by xao gypsie ( 641755 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:48PM (#6086041)
    ...but man, she gets around more than my ex-girlfriend...

    xao

  • It's already set up for soccer (Score:4, Funny)

    by Chairboy ( 88841 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:49PM (#6086043) Homepage
    According to an article I read, while the flight deck elevator (that brings planes up to the top from the hangar) works, the actual hangar deck has been converted to a soccer arena.

  • Big deal (Score:3, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:49PM (#6086045)
    My uncle bought an old Russian diesel sub. in 1996 for 150k he turned it into a floating restaurant on the Mississipi river.

  • I'm in! (Score:5, Funny)

    by fadeaway ( 531137 ) * on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:49PM (#6086047)
    If 15,000 of us put in $300, we could get this baby.

    Oh, the LAN parties we could have on the SS /.!

  • Come on, Slashdot! (Score:2, Interesting)

    by Winterblink ( 575267 )
    Lets put together a trust fund to buy this thing in the name of nerd news and matter-ful stuff. With the sizable readership of this site we could probably drop in a few bucks a piece to purchase it. :)

  • Minas Gerais (Score:3, Funny)

    by lgordon ( 103004 ) <larry...gordon@@@gmail...com> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:50PM (#6086052) Journal
    Oh well. I thought they were selling something cool, like Minas Tirith or Minas Morgul.

  • that's cheap (Score:5, Interesting)

    by luzrek ( 570886 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:50PM (#6086057) Journal
    And for only 4.5 million USD. If only I had that much.

    Seriously, that thing would make one hell of a house. You could just more it up to a dock. Barge on the Seine my butt. I want an aircraft carrier in New York Harbor.

    On second thought that would make one hell of a target for terrorists. Better put it somewhere in New Jersey.

  • $4.5 million USD! (Score:5, Insightful)

    by 2nd Post! ( 213333 ) <gundbear@pacbell . n et> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:50PM (#6086058) Homepage
    So a complement of 1.300, each paying $400 a month rent...

    That's easily a half million rent a month! So living aboard, for a year, would generate $6 million, which covers the cost of upkeep and purchase in 2 years, and profitable in 3!

    • Re:$4.5 million USD! (Score:5, Funny)

      by Timesprout ( 579035 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:03PM (#6086114)
      And anyone who slacks on the rent gets shot off the catapult

      • Re:$4.5 million USD! (Score:5, Interesting)

        by Realistic_Dragon ( 655151 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:09PM (#6086144) Homepage
        Thankfully new UK carriers don't have catapults, we switched to the ski jump style a while back which is much friendlier for the airframe and allows a greater take off weight, especially when coupled with BAE Harriers (or indeed a JSF).

        Of course at one point we were even thinking of doing away with flight decks on carriers - there was an experimental sky hook system to catch a flying Harrier on a smaller ship. Thankfully abandoned due to sanity returning and the drugs wearing off :o)

        • Re:$4.5 million USD! (Score:3, Interesting)

          by The Mayor ( 6048 )
          This is exactly why British aircraft carriers are completely ineffective. By going for a smaller (and cheaper) aircraft carrier, they have reduced the number of aircraft from around 90 to around 40. Recent conflicts have shown that it takes about 30-40 aircraft simply to provide adequate air support for one aircraft carrier. The result? You can provide air cover for your fleet, but you can't project air power. The aircraft carriers dispatched to the Falklands were never fully engaged in combat, and the

      • Re:$4.5 million USD! (Score:4, Funny)

        by Tumbleweed ( 3706 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:43PM (#6086308)
        No, no, you make 'em walk the plank!

        Or you keel-haul 'em. *ouch*

        "Scrub the poop-deck? Where's that at - is it near the Lido deck?"

  • Someone call Larry Ellison! (Score:5, Funny)

    by Spacelord ( 27899 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:52PM (#6086062)
    Someone call Larry Ellison! Would make a great addition to his MiG fighter jet.

  • weapon of mass destruction (Score:5, Funny)

    by koi88 ( 640490 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:56PM (#6086081)
    Maybe George W. should buy it and write "Saddamz aircraft carria" on it. That should convince the few unpatriotic people who still doubt the justification for attacking Iraq.

  • Status! (Score:3, Funny)

    by davidc ( 91400 ) <`cdpuff' `at' `gmail.com'> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:57PM (#6086090)
    Remember, once you got an aircraft carrier, you really somebody, you got status ! People will no longer think you are a pickled herring salesman, nossir!

    (Showing my age, with apologies to de voice of John Bird, played by de honorable Idi Amin Esq.)

  • Apparently (Score:5, Funny)

    by Timesprout ( 579035 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:58PM (#6086091)
    De-Commissioned November 2001, Sold to Private concerns 2002, Sale did not complete.

    Bin Laden gets sea sick

  • Linux? (Score:5, Funny)

    by gspr ( 602968 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:58PM (#6086093)
    Does she run Linux?

  • Cool, but... (Score:4, Funny)

    by Scalli0n ( 631648 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @02:59PM (#6086099) Homepage
    As always, I must present the downside:

    1. Do you know how to drive an aircraft carrier? I don't think it has merely a gas/brake/steering wheel.
    2. Which country was going to let you bring that monstrosity into their port again...?
    3. Don't these things require a crew of 1000's? Or at least 100 people I'd imagine, more if something goes wrong!
    4. It costs me $20 to fill my car up at the gas station...dear god, I don't even want to think of this!!!

    But beyond that, a cool purchase to be sure. It would be even funnier if it were on ebay.

  • Follow the hyperlinks... (Score:3, Interesting)

    by SkArcher ( 676201 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:02PM (#6086110) Journal
    and you will find that there is a charitable fund set up to buy this and turn her into a floating museum, as befits her place as the last surviving WW2 british aircraft carrier

    A lot less interesting than the 'world domination' plans, but then, this carrier is outdated and wouldn't last 2 minutes against a modern navy, hence why it is for public sale.

  • Diamond Age.... (Score:4, Funny)

    by MrWa ( 144753 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:03PM (#6086116) Homepage
    So which billionaire Chinese man is going to buy this and raise thousands of orphan girls to raise into a karate-kicking, boot-toting army? [amazon.com]
    • No, with our luck the Scientologists will get their little grubby hands on it. Just what the world needs, a fake religious navy with a aircraft carrier.

  • Cheap at the price! (Score:3, Funny)

    by spinlocked ( 462072 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:05PM (#6086121)
    $4.5m seems like a bargain until you tot up the running costs. Those admiralty drum boilers are thirsty beasts - HMS Belfast (a mere cruiser) had 4 of these, consuming ~26 tons of furnace fuel oil per hour at full steam. Plus of course the wages for your private army of mercenary sailors, uniforms, medals, rum, ex-soviet MiGs, an elaborate escape submarine - it soon adds up. It's not easy being an evil genius these days...
  • Unfortunately, most decomissioned ships that go up for sale are bought by metal scrap yards who recycle the materials. We'd like to think that some rich guys buys them and then goes sailing around in a battleship, but that is rarely (never?) the case.

  • set up a paypal account to gather the 4,5m USD, ship it to international waters, close to a big communication node, set up a server farm aboard of it, and say f... you to RIAA/DMCA/Whatever for the sake of freedom of speech and thinking !!! Of course no "illegal activities" like terrorism, drug trafficing etc.
    What do you think about it ?
  • My money is on a consortium of the RIAA, the MPAA and Microsoft to purcahase this...

    Pirates ahoy! All hands to battle stations!

  • You think... (Score:5, Funny)

    by dentar ( 6540 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:17PM (#6086174) Homepage Journal
    If I bought that aircraft carrier, then flew in on it dressed in a flight suit with the crotch all puffed up, people might be tricked into thinking -I- was a hero too?

    Thought not.

  • I'd go for something a little more fuel efficient (Score:5, Funny)

    by blair1q ( 305137 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:18PM (#6086182) Journal
    Capacity: 3,196 Tons ...
    Endurance: 12,000 Nautical miles @ 14 Knots, 6,200 Nautical Miles @ 25 Knots

    So that's roughtly 4 nm/ton city, 2 highway.

    Great for running around town, but where would you park it?

  • Brazilian navy still strong (Score:3, Funny)

    by TrekkieGod ( 627867 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:21PM (#6086199) Homepage Journal

    They still have 1 (one) aircraft carrier remaining...The "São Paulo".

    But, heck, who needs aircraft carriers when you can have this baby [mar.mil.br]?

    LOL...and before the flame war starts...please understand this is just a joke. The list of other ships [mar.mil.br] still commissioned is quite impressive.

  • So... COOL! (Score:3, Interesting)

    by LeoDV ( 653216 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:29PM (#6086234) Journal
    Seriously, if someone gave me $4,500,010 right now I would buy an aircraft carrier and a lot of candy.

    A way to make it profitable would be to go around the world and offer paying tours. Or even cruises (though that would require a lot of people...) Enough to supply the fuel, pay back the loan you took out to buy it and fit it with enough computers and a network to run it all from the bridge, but most of all, have the COOLEST HOUSE ON EARTH.

    ...so...COOL...

  • What's in YOUR wallet?! (Score:4, Insightful)

    by Mulletproof ( 513805 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:44PM (#6086313) Homepage Journal
    Don't forget all those hidden fees when buying this carrier.

    -Insurance (Ow.)
    -Crew (you could get away with under a crew of thousand without aircraft and weapondry, I'm sure)
    -Supplies
    -Fuel (that's gonna kill ya)
    -Licencing (I'm sure the government isn't just gonna let you run around with a spare carrier without some sort of tax)
    -ATM fee

    I don't care if it is only 4.5 mil. You're gonna have to have deeeep pockets just for upkeep, let alone taking it out for a spin... And you can stop with the Neal Stephenson jokes now. They've all been taken.

    • Why does everyone assume you need a crew of thousands for this thing. My dad was on an ore carrier that was larger than this and it had a crew of 23. And that crew included 3 cooks! Running and even maintaining this thing shouldn't take many people at all. Now operating the flight deck and maintaining a squadron of aircraft would take a bunch but just the ship would take a couple dozen tops.

  • Let's get an aircraft carrier! (Score:5, Funny)

    by Tumbleweed ( 3706 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:50PM (#6086336)
    "It's only a model."

    "Shhh!"

  • "What are we going to do today, Brain?" (Score:5, Funny)

    by Tumbleweed ( 3706 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @03:55PM (#6086363)
    "The same thing we do every day, Pinky, try to take over the world."

  • Aricraft *Carrirr*, not flyer (Score:3, Funny)

    by AlecC ( 512609 ) <aleccawley@gmail.com> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @04:03PM (#6086403)
    Back in abot 1971 I saw this ship at anchor in Rio harour. i was told by my Brazilian host that the first aircraft launched from the flight deck by the Brazilians had gone down, not up - and splashed. Since then, no pilot brave enough to have a second try had been found.

  • Buy it for Canada! (Score:5, Funny)

    by farrellj ( 563 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @04:36PM (#6086569) Homepage Journal
    We haven't had a carrier since the Bonaventure!!!! Please donate and help us out!

    ttyl
    Farrell

  • $4,500,000, 6 million Slashdot users - chip in! (Score:5, Funny)

    by TekPolitik ( 147802 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @05:00PM (#6086678) Journal
    One Aircraft Carrier: $4,500,000.
    Slashdot registered users: 6,000,000.
    Online geek community with own aircraft carrier: Priceless.

  • Can I take it for a test drive? (Score:5, Funny)

    by gilesjuk ( 604902 ) <giles.jones@nOsPAM.zen.co.uk> on Saturday May 31, 2003 @05:39PM (#6086860)
    Well I want to see if it runs well :)

  • Logical applications (Score:3, Insightful)

    by zakezuke ( 229119 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @06:03PM (#6086941)
    Application #1: With current issues regarding DMCA laws and a whole bunch of bogusness... I'm rather shocked someone isn't considering buying such a beast in order to start up an off shore server in international waters. Pirate telivision / radio would also be a logical application.

    Application #2: Organizations such as Green Peace need boats in order to get around and block access. This is a big boat.

    Application #3: Off shore power plant. Production of things like hydrogen or other fuels.

  • Man, you find some crazy stuff on E-Bay. (Score:3, Funny)

    by surfcow ( 169572 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @07:25PM (#6087256) Homepage
    For Sale: 500,000 lbs of chemical weapons, only used once. Be the envy of your region! Buyer pays shipping.

    For Sale: special aluminium tubes for building a breeder reactor capable of creating weapon's grade materials, or perhaps just nice, shiny pipes for indoor plumbing.

    Unique - mobile biological weapons laboratories of an ingenious design. Guaranteed to contain no trace of any biological weapons material. Needs work.

    No Reserve! Blank Nigerian documents for Uranium exports, cheap. Great gag gift. No reserve!

    Rare Collector's item: Nuclear warhead of North Korean design. Discount for unstable dictators.

    First edition! "The Wit and Wisdom of George W. Bush". Mint condition. Buyer pays 37 cent postage.

  • Canadian boat better and cheaper (Score:3, Interesting)

    by digitalgimpus ( 468277 ) on Saturday May 31, 2003 @08:16PM (#6087432) Homepage
    http://www.frenchcreekboatsales.com/details.asp?Fi le_Number=PW852

    The M.V. Cowichan
    (pronounced) M V COW-ITCH-en

    and affordable:

    Reduced to $190,000(CDN) OBO

    Boy, I guess it's safe to say they will never attack america.

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