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Microsoft

Microsoft's iLoo Project A Hoax 323

Posted by Hemos from the taken-in dept.
minesweeper writes "It appears that the 'iLoo,' a portable toilet with Internet access designed by Microsoft, was actually just a hoax issued by its MSN division in the United Kingdom. In addition to receiving press here on Slashdot, the fake release was also covered by The Wall Street Journal, The Associated Press, and Reuters. See a diagram of the iLoo here."
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Microsoft's iLoo Project A Hoax More

Microsoft's iLoo Project A Hoax

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  • load of crap (Score:4, Funny)

    by Cally ( 10873 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:02AM (#5943587) Homepage
    ...as I said at the time. Boom, boom!
    • Maybe this iLoo was created with the genuine intention of building such a product. But when it started to get press, the MSFT brass realised it was a 'stinky' idea. Why would MSFT UK just release something outrageous like this as a hoax? I think they didn't want to fess up and admit that they had a terrible idea so they just said it was a hoax.

  • a hoax (Score:5, Funny)

    by greenalbatros ( 215035 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:03AM (#5943592)
    and if you were unfortunate enough to have fallen for it, your picture and whatever it was you did in there will soon be posted on the internet for the world to see. Trusted computing my arse

  • Yeah, but (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:03AM (#5943595)
    unfortunately.. it turns out Longhorn wasn't a hoax. :(

  • Typical Microsoft (Score:3, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:03AM (#5943597)
    An April fool that's wayyy late.

  • dont read if you offend easily (Score:5, Funny)

    by daveatwork ( 655626 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:04AM (#5943604)
    sooo, not only do microsoft talk shit, they talk shit about making things that deal with shit, which end up being as useful as shit, because, in the end, its all shit... :-)
    • ...its all shit...

      On that note, a quick comparive guide to religion:

      • Toaism: Shit Happens
      • Bhuddism: Bhudda Said, Shit Happens
      • Catholism: Shit happened because you are bad
      • Judiaism: Why does this shit keep happening to us?
      • Rhastafarianism: Let's smoke this shit
  • They even say it to our faces "Your stupid, you believe everything we say, we can tell you this, and you'll still buy our OS for a hugely overpriced cost!". Well I guess at least the UK division has a sense of humor.

    I love you cowboy neal! Come back!

  • Whoever's responsible... (Score:3, Funny)

    by worst_name_ever ( 633374 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:05AM (#5943607)
    I'm sure when they find out the name of the guy responsible for the hoax, his job will be flushed...

  • Does that mean ... (Score:4, Funny)

    by dereklam ( 621517 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:05AM (#5943611)
    Does that mean the iLoo has gone down the toilet?

  • Surround Sound (Score:3, Funny)

    by moonboy ( 2512 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:05AM (#5943612)
    Yeah, I thought the 6 channel surround sound was bit much.

  • It is Fiction? (Score:3, Funny)

    by drwav ( 577314 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:07AM (#5943616)
    but... I thought reality was supposed to be stranger than fiction.

  • Hrmmm.... (Score:4, Insightful)

    by sdiver ( 624109 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:07AM (#5943619) Homepage
    So what are the chances MicroSoft thought this was a legit idea upon releasing the concept, only to backpedal and say it was a "joke" a few days later? Seems like and odd joke to me...

    • Re:Hrmmm.... (Score:2, Insightful)

      by Lust ( 14189 )
      Faked corporate press releases draw immediate attention (hence the /. article) but in the long-run only make publishers hesitant to post your legitimate stories. I suspect that upper management might be getting (or giving) an earful for this incident.
  • a poop dream....

  • BSOD (Score:3, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:08AM (#5943626)
    Just imagine if they had made one and you had to
    take a 3-flusher. All of a sudden, BSOD. The bowl
    is full. You need to flush, but the flush control is a
    mouse click and you can't reboot (that's locked out
    by their new DRM controls so only the janitor
    can reboot). Stranded


    Or, could you imagine the germs on the mouse or
    trackpad. Or you were in New York where no one
    washes their hands. Or porn....

    • Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

      by Oddly_Drac ( 625066 )
      "Or, could you imagine the germs on the mouse or trackpad. Or you were in New York where no one washes their hands. Or porn...."

      I need to wash my porn?

      OD

  • Also on CNN (Score:5, Informative)

    by TheMidget ( 512188 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:08AM (#5943627)
    click here [cnn.com] (don't be afraid, it's not one of those links that are on-topic to this story in their own special way...)

  • Not a totally bad idea. (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Deathlizard ( 115856 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:09AM (#5943631) Homepage Journal
    Although having a Portable PC in a Porta-potty doesn't make much sense, it seems like a somewhat good idea in a permament environment.

    I mean realistically your going to be sitting down anyway and since your basicially a captive audience you might as well read up on the news or sports while your there. It's better than reading the writing on the wall.

    Of course a paper would be just as good, but something like this built into a wall would be more up to date. It doesn't really need to be interactive either. just run headlines, Sport Scores and Stock Market tickers.

    • Re:Not a totally bad idea. (Score:5, Insightful)

      by EvilTwinSkippy ( 112490 ) <yoda@NosPAM.etoyoc.com> on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:21AM (#5943687) Homepage Journal
      I just keep thinking of the study where computer keyboards were found to be dirtier than toilet seats...

      I mean, do you REALLY want to be handling a keyboard that was handled by the guy in front of you, who was ALSO in the process of cleaning feces off of his bottom. Hint, the sink and soap are NOT in the stall.

      • (Believe it or not, I was pondering it on the loo/john just now, before heading back to my station. And yes, I washed my hands.)

        I'd tend to view common-use keyboards in toilets the same as gas station restrooms. Do your business, but don't let any part of your body touch anything if you can help it.

        But if your at home with a wi-fi and a portable laptop (with, say, a hamper to rest the laptop), then I consider it the 21st-Century equivalent of taking the newspaper in the morning.

        Just, um, disinfect the k
        • consider it the 21st-Century equivalent of taking the newspaper in the morning.

          I don't feel so wierd for doing that anymore. Though I live in an apartment, and in the bathroom I cross over into my neighbor's wifi signal, and the jerk doesn't have DHCP running. I also run into the problem of the size of the laptop. A toilet in a 1 bedroom flat like I have buts right into the shower. I really don't have anywhere to put the laptop down when I'm finished that isn't a bathtub, sink, floor or catbox.

          You end u

      • This is a good place for speech interface or a touch keypad (one could always use some tissue to click on a link). Furthermore, bathroom reading may not need a lot of keyboard interactions.

        S
  • Comment removed based on user account deletion

  • So How Does This Affect (Score:5, Funny)

    by The Dobber ( 576407 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:12AM (#5943643)

    The Open Source communities efforts to build a better shitter?

  • ... after they realized everyone was making fun of their iLoo. So they just pulled it back.

    From the article:
    In an e-mail sent last week to The Associated Press, Red Consultancy's Ben Philipson wrote "MSN is really working on building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ... This is very much a 'toe in the water' experiment to gauge interest so we'll have to see how it goes, although judging from response so far it's really captured people's imagination!"

    Malina Bragg, who helps with
  • Yeah, the reaction of everyone laughing at it forced them to look for a way to back out of it. They're calling it a hoax after gettig a little free market research!
  • There seems to be some kind of coincednce here, XP in a portajohn.
  • I was starting to worry about getting a BSoD while trying to download my brownware.

    And don't even get me started about the built in DRM system to handle the secure "door locking" functionality and toilette paper access restrictions.

  • Since when did Microsoft start making stuff named in British English? Good hoax, though.

    • Re:Pretty obvious (Score:3, Informative)

      by Gordonjcp ( 186804 )
      Yes, "Loo" from the company that *still* spells "colour" as "color" and "favourite" as "favorite" even when you select the UK English language settings? Come on guys, you're supposed to have this language thing sorted now.
  • Why would they want us to associate Microsoft and a toilet? Things that make you go "hmmm...."

  • "due to be unveiled this summer"

    Since when has Micro$oft ever delivered a product in under 5 years ?

    It was obviously a hoax, just like Longhorn, .NET, MS Corporate IM, XML in Word, Server 2003 XML, Bob II....
    • Longhorn preview 1 has already been leaked, .Net framework is here and already in production at many site including microsoft.com, not sure about corporate IM, XML is in Word XP..it just really sucks balls, Server 2003 can do XML as well as any OS, and finally Clippy is Bob II and is just as freaking annoying as the origional (thank god he's dead in XP)

  • Your shitting me! (Score:3, Funny)

    by EvilTwinSkippy ( 112490 ) <yoda@NosPAM.etoyoc.com> on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:18AM (#5943674) Homepage Journal
    I really think the "hoax" is PR's way of covering their ass. I think Bill was just pissed off about the reaction it recieved.

    This whole thing stinks, they knew it, and they wanted to wash their hands of the matter. Who wouldn't after the smear job it recieved. Talk about being caught with your pants down!

  • Apple iTolete (Score:3, Interesting)

    by POds ( 241854 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:18AM (#5943677) Homepage Journal
    i wonder if this was inspired by the Apple iToilet [electric-chicken.co.uk]
  • Ish*t [ishit.ca], is not active atm, but you can check out his setup, to let people flush his toilet from a browser ;)
    Here [demon.co.uk] you can read a comparison of the internet and a toilet...
    Always amusing Onion [theonion.com], has an article on online sh*tting ;)

    Man, I gotta pull myself together and get some work done :P
  • ... a beowulf cluster of those.

    No, seriously. Imagine that!

  • 1. Make news about some shitty product.
    2. Wait for all competitors to start similar projects.
    3. Call the project a hoax.
    4. Watch competitors go bankrupt.
    5. ???
    6. Profit!!!

  • Shit (Score:5, Funny)

    by A Proud American ( 657806 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:26AM (#5943708)
    I guess this means I should cancel my GNUPoo project over at SourceForge.

  • Damn that 5ux0r5!! (Score:3, Funny)

    by Wo-Fat ( 197418 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:27AM (#5943709)
    I was looking forward to writing the W32/flusher.gen virus. I had all my plans in the works. Automatic flushing, and handwashing alarms....

  • Really? (Score:3, Funny)

    by bigfatlamer ( 149907 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:29AM (#5943718)
    A hoax? No way! I already bought my plane tickets and passes to ever music festival in the UK this summer just so I could check my email from an shit covered keyboard in an outhouse.

    Damn...now what am I going to do?
    BFL
  • Microsoft announces that .NET is actually a hoax. All things coded in .NET should disentegrate within hours.

  • Yes of course, they had to retract... (Score:5, Funny)

    by joto ( 134244 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:33AM (#5943740)
    After all, iLoo was already trademarked by Apple, the new toilet from Microsoft will be called Microsoft Shit 1.0.
  • hmmm, I was thinking about my new marketing project:
    Frag While you crap
    Never mind i will work on something else

  • What took them so long? (Score:2, Informative)

    by NOCRic ( 556035 )
    So the UK office puts out a funny-gram on 30 April and it takes the headquarters over 10 days to say it was a joke? This after the "release" was carried by everyone from /. to major news carriers? Sure, it was amusing but it was obviously being taken seriously by the press. They should have come out with the laugh and the "oh, hey - they were just kidding" memo a lot sooner.

  • The Ultimate Test... (Score:3, Informative)

    by ayjay29 ( 144994 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:36AM (#5943760)
    "MSN is really working on building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ..."

    The Glasonbury Festival could be the ultimate test for a wired toilet. Problem is most of the users would be too stoned to notice, and who in their right mind is going to spend any longer than needed in a Glasto portaloo to check their hotmail, (that is if it doesn't get nicked by the skallies).

    This is how the Festival Organisers describe them...
    "The 'long drop' toilets are open stalls positioned above a large pit - looking down is not advised! The stall gates often don't lock, so it's advised to look under the gate for feet before entering a stall. But don't be surprised if you then do find someone inside - squatting with feet on the seat is a popular way of avoiding skin contact."

  • So I guess we wont be seeing http://www.microsoft.com/peecam then.
  • Comment removed based on user account deletion

  • A hoax?! (Score:2)

    by iso ( 87585 )

    Great. Just when Microsoft finally makes something that doesn't suck, they say it's a hoax. And was sitting there with money in hand...

    - j

  • Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Brian_Ellenberger ( 308720 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:41AM (#5943789)

    Here is the Google Cache [google.com] for the iLoo.

    How can your own company hoax itself?!?! This wasn't just some Onion article or fake email everyone sent out. It was a bloody press release! And it was NOT an April Fools Trick as it dates May 2nd.

    Gee everybody was fooled into believing the iLoo was real because Microsoft issues a press release saying it was building the darn thing. Really pulled one over on us...

    MAYBE the truth is that Microsoft recieved so much bad press over it that they decided to pull the iLoo and pretend it was a joke. If that is the case, aren't there regulations against such things?

    Brian

    • Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! (Score:4, Informative)

      by truthsearch ( 249536 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @08:12AM (#5943964) Homepage Journal
      If that is the case, aren't there regulations against such things?

      In the US there are regulations against false advertising, but AFAIK press releases don't count. Press releases are released to the press (for those who couldn't figure that out) and not published by purchasing ad space. So it's my understanding a company can announce whatever they want and the press can report it. What they can't do is buy a billboard and post a picture of the iLoo on it saying "Contact your local plumber!"
      • You could argue that the release would have a material impact on their stock price and allege securities fraud. I don't think you'd get far though - how many folks out there ran out to buy MS stock because they decided to corner the porta-potty PC market?
        • As an employee at an investment firm I can say analysts weren't running wild with the idea that there would be a huge market niche for potty PCs and that everyone should dump their money into MSFT to get in on the Next Big Thing. Although maybe they should patent the design so no one else will make it.
    • I agree that they fooled parts of their own company.. lol

      I saw this in the CNN article:

      "Malina Bragg, who helps with MSN's account for Waggener Edstrom, also said last week that the project was real. "

    • And it was NOT an April Fools Trick as it dates May 2nd.

      Uh, it would be very un-Microsoft-like for them to release something on time. It was probably intended for April 1st but release got delayed by 32 days.

      -- Dossy

  • Ms does Vaporware? (Score:3, Funny)

    by linuxislandsucks ( 461335 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:42AM (#5943793) Homepage Journal
    Since one of the DOC lawsuits that MS settle on had a clause about vapor ware does DOC now have the right to claim MS violated the settlement agreement?
  • It's sad such a fine institution of news delivery was compromised as such

  • Hoax? (Score:2)

    by mbbac ( 568880 )
    Is it only a hoax because it wasn't received as well as they had anticipated? Isn't this something that Microsoft does? Shit something out and see if it floats?

  • Not in my lifetime... (Score:5, Funny)

    by pongo000 ( 97357 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:48AM (#5943833)
    ...would I have ever thought I would see /. ranked right up there with the big boys:

    In addition to receiving press here on Slashdot, the fake release was also covered by The Wall Street Journal, The Associated Press, and Reuters.

    What prestige! I bet my boss wouldn't even notice if I swapped out his beloved Journal with a copy of today's /. headlines. Hell, he might even stop bitching at me about wasting time reading all that geek drivel, now that he realizes he's been in good company all along.
  • A Hoax! NO SHIT!

  • This was not a hoax! (Score:5, Informative)

    by Black Perl ( 12686 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @07:54AM (#5943870)
    This time, SFgate is wrong. It's not a hoax. Read the article. It's a legitimate experiment to build a prototype for the Glastonbury festival. It's just that it got so much attention that an embarrassed Microsoft had to say that it wasn't officially sanctioned communication. This does not mean it's a hoax. The SFgate chose a poor headline, especially after the reporter verified that the project was true.
    • Gawd, that's gotta be a PHE (pointy-haired editor/boss) move.

      editor: didja get the story on the iLoo?
      reporter: yeah, Redmond says it wasn't sanctioned (they sounded pretty embarassed), but the UK office says it is real.
      editor: ok, so it is a fake, right?
      reporter: well, not really, no.
      editor: so what's the by-line then?
      reporter: I dunno - iLoo not a Hoax?
      editor: but, you just said Microsoft said it was fake?
      reporter: *sigh* no, I said that the MS UK office confirmed that they really are building a prototyp
  • If this had been on Mac Rumors, about Apple, most of the postings would have been in favor.
  • Now without the iLoo where will I deposit my iPoo? I guess that's what I get for eating at iDonald's.

  • Do we all believe it actually is a hoax ? (Score:5, Insightful)

    by tmark ( 230091 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @08:04AM (#5943925)
    It *could* be just P.R. damage control designed to counter how silly MS was looking. The CNN article I read indicated that the legitimacy of the toilet was attested to by several other MS staffers.

    • Re:Do we all believe it actually is a hoax ? (Score:4, Interesting)

      by Fishstick ( 150821 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @08:51AM (#5944245) Journal
      the headline claims it was a hoax, the article says the release was "false", but then later says

      The Associated Press received confirmation of the project from both Microsoft Corp.'s Waggener Edstrom public relations firm and London-based Red Consultancy, which handles such work for the software giant in England.

      In an e-mail sent last week to The Associated Press, Red Consultancy's Ben Philipson wrote "MSN is really working on building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ... This is very much a 'toe in the water' experiment to gauge interest so we'll have to see how it goes, although judging from response so far it's really captured people's imagination!"

      Malina Bragg, who helps with MSN's account for Waggener Edstrom, also verified last week that the project was true.

      Where did Microsoft say that this wasn't real? All they said was that it wasn't "sanctioned commuinication" and that they "apologized for any "confusion or offense". Sounds like they just are embarassed. They might get the UK office to pull the plug on the thing, but it doesn't sound like anyone "made this up".

      Sounds like somebody just really wanted to put "hoax" in the headline, regardless of the facts.

  • Microsoft incapable of making toliets... (Score:4, Funny)

    by dcavanaugh ( 248349 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @08:08AM (#5943939) Homepage
    Who would think of trusting Microsoft with a device as important as the toilet? What would stop every script kiddie in the area from using your bathroom? How far from your computer does the toilet have to be in order to prevent Microsoft toilet viruses from reading your Outlook address book? How reliable would such a toilet be?

    So you upgrade to the Palladium toilet, but now you can only go to the bathroom when Microsoft says it's OK.

    Microsoft Flush 2003 offers very little improvment over Flush 2000, but you have to buy it because of "Potty Assurance (tm)." The new requirement of having each bathroom visitor sign the EULA looks annoying at first until you realize that the hardcopy EULAs are useful as toilet paper.

  • MSN ZDNet even carried the story Here [com.com].

  • lawsuit possibility (Score:3, Interesting)

    by moojin ( 124799 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @08:21AM (#5944010)
    not that i can't take a good joke, but is their some legal precedence that would enable a person or entity to sue MSN UK? couldn't the media companies that took the time to research and publish (print, tv, internet media) this story could sue for lost revenue, lost wages, lost time, lost reputation (for printing a hoax? couldn't companies with analysts covering microsoft or the embedded devices market sue for lost revenue and lost time?

    not that i would sue, but shouldn't their be some legal ramifications for this hoax? what if somebody could prove that MS stock price actually increased in the time directly after the announcement?

    just my ramblings...

  • Dear Slashdot Editors,

    On behalf of the iLoo Anticipation Society, we all(5 members) would like to thank you personally for showing us the light and clarifying that the iLoo is a hoax. We can now abandon our fruitless hopes and dreams of an iLoo future and try to continue on, strengthened by Slashdot's resolve to get "the truth out there, at any cost!"

    We're heartbroken, and a touch embarassed by having the proverbial wool pulled over our eyes, but we don't want to live a lie either.

  • No shit?
  • Just imagine the time wasted by the discussion about this hoax. Well ok, we know that Microsoft is a source for viruses, but that they now also begun to spread out hoaxes is a bit new.

  • Darn! (Score:3, Funny)

    by neildiamond ( 610251 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @10:22AM (#5945062)
    I thought Microsoft was finally being innovative!

  • I doubt it was a hoax (Score:3, Informative)

    by Edmund Blackadder ( 559735 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @10:41AM (#5945258)
    As the article states, the Associated press recieved confirmations that it was true from two of Microsoft's public relations agencies.

    It is believable that maybe some engineers or lower management will plant a false story as a joke, but the public relation firms deal with top management only ... there is no way they would have confirmed that unless they had microsoft corp's ok.

    It is much more likely that after realizing the whole thing just got turned into a bad joke in the media, Microsoft decided to pretend they never had anything to do with the whole project.

  • Late as always... (Score:3, Funny)

    by Dave21212 ( 256924 ) <dav@spamcop.net> on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @12:21PM (#5946429) Homepage Journal

    A Microsoft spokesperson is now claiming that it was "an April's Fools joke [com.com]"

    Leave it to M$ to delivery over a month late on a simply joke... WinFS in 2005 [theregister.co.uk], yeah right...

  • iLoo is real! Microsoft flip-flops again! (Score:3, Informative)

    by grouchomarxist ( 127479 ) on Tuesday May 13, 2003 @08:02PM (#5950737)
    According to this article [yahoo.com] Microsoft is now claiming that the iLoo is not a hoax, but was a concept being developed and has since been cancelled. "We jumped the gun basically yesterday in confirming that it was a hoax, and in fact it was not," said Lisa Gurry, MSN group product manager....On Tuesday, though, Microsoft said it had relied on bad information from a Microsoft employee in the United Kingdom who said it was a hoax, Gurry said. After more talks with people in London, the company determined it was a real project, after all.

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