HP/Compaq Merger Official Today 184
Ankou writes: "Today (May 6th, 2002) marks the first day of the Hewlett Packard and Compaq merger. The finalized buyout of Compaq is expected to be done today and are expected to be working together "as a combined entity" by tomorrow. This also means a new stock symbol will replace the old HWP to the new symbol HPQ. Behind the hype this merger will cost, according resources at CNN on this article, a total loss of 15,000 more jobs with over 150,000 following the next two years. The same article details more information regarding the new merger and the recent events which have lead to today." Update: 05/06 15:03 GMT by T : Note: that job-loss figure is off; the 15,000 jobs projected to be cut are from a total of 150,000 between the two companies.
New Name... (Score:2, Funny)
Change is good!
Re:New Name... (Score:1)
Re:New Name... (Score:1)
Re:New Name... (Score:2)
Re:New Name... (Score:2)
I've always thought it would be Hewcom Packpaq.
Content error (Score:5, Informative)
It also will result in the loss of at least 15,000 jobs out of a combined work force of 150,000 during the next two years.
Not that 165,000 jobs will be cut....
-Chris
Re:Content error (Score:3, Funny)
Nah. Those jobs won't be lost until Fiorna drives the company into the ground.
I'd estimate one, perhaps two years.
Re:Content error (Score:1)
"Step 1: Invest in Microsoft. Step 2:
Could Step 2 be sell it short?
Re:Content error (Score:1)
Re:Content error (Score:2)
I'm guessing three years, tops.
--Blair
Re:Content error (Score:1)
Re:Content error (Score:2)
Jason
Surprise! (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:Surprise! (Score:2)
Re:Surprise! (Score:2)
Posts like this make my head hurt. Since when does competition, feigned or otherwise, keep prices high? The reason 15,000 people are going to get the 'pink slip' is to reduce competition (and redundancy in manufacturing), thus improving profitability. Or so the theory goes. Time will tell.
Re:Surprise! (Score:1)
Real competition does help keep prices low. The point was that this is only the appearance of competition.
Re:Surprise! (Score:1)
Ie they make all the computers in the same place and slap a differnt sticker on 'em.
Re:Surprise! (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Surprise! (Score:2, Insightful)
Its printing business is just a shadow of HP's while they are strongest in servers and PCs, HP is not far behind.
Re:Surprise! (Score:2)
...Seems to me as if Compaq
That's a load of bollocks. Compaq always were vacuum cleaner salesmen compared to HP. As is Dell. Ok Compaq tried to fix this situation by buying Digital, which as everyone knows, was a real tech company like HP. They also bought Tandem, I think. Not that it changed stuff much. Even after Compaq bought Digital they still were hoover salesmen. I mean, via Digital they had the arguably best RISC processor architecture ever (alpha), a reasonably good commercial unix which made their high-end offerings quite good, had they pumped enough capital into it to keep it going. But no, instead they sold they whole lot to Intel, so that they could focus on selling low-margin-pc:s. Sheesh! Compete with Dell in a super-low-margin-cut-throat market. What a blindingly stupid idea! Uh, sorry, "focusing on services (the niche where there is little if none competition, right?)" is the buzzword du jour which masks all management blunders. And yes, well there were rumours that the Alpha sellout was in fact a part of the deal with HP, which perhaps puts it in a different light.
Compaq? Research? Bwahahahaha (Score:2)
I give HPaq 18 months, until they sell off printing and imaging and go bankrupt in an orgy of finger-pointing and recrimination. Fiorina, the architect of this train-wreck, will, naturally, be fired upwards. Again.
'jfb
Re:Compaq? Research? Bwahahahaha (Score:2)
Oh, sorry, you meant "big" as in quad processor x86. Or were you referring to the Tandem Nonstop technology that Compaq bought (*not* designed)? Or the big DEC Alpha machines -- again, you do know that they didn't do anything to Alpha but fuck it royally right up, yes?
Putting the best quality parts -- as purchased from other people -- into a box with a copy of NT and a custom powersupply doesn't really qualify as building "big" computers.
'jfb
AC Replies courteously! Pope, Jewish! (Score:2)
"The simple truth is that you are wrong about Compaq purchasing all of the parts from other people and assembling them."
You are of course correct. I plead rhetorical exaggeration: in this instance, because the HPaq merger is idiotic for HP, which at least passes a semblance of being a research-driven technology company. Truly, you have to admit that there's nothing at Compaq like the PA-RISC people (oops, sold to Intel), or their compiler team (uh oh, off to MS and Intel), or their printer and instrumentation folks (how much longer can they last)?
Compaq's been on a downward spiral since, well, since Dell. The fact that the DL740 (or whatever the 8 Xeon box is) has some tidy h/w engineering in it is swamped by the fact that nobody needs them, at least, nobody needs them badly enough to shell out the premium over Dell's offerings.
The commodity PC market -- and yes, those servers *are* commodity PCs, even if they're bigger -- is dead. HP is buying a huge exposure to zero margin commodity PCs in addition to the dysfunctional and hateful "services" group. The only winners are IBM and Dell. Oh, and Fiorina, who'll no doubt ride off with another $18,000,000 payday as HPaq dies an ignominous death. Lucent, anyone?
'jfb
Re:Surprise! (Score:2)
HP is much bigger than Compaq, and always has been.
Re:Surprise! (Score:3, Insightful)
Actually, HP spun off their test equipment line into a new company, Agilent [agilent.com], back in 1999.
Long live RPN!
Wrong (Score:2, Informative)
Re:Wrong (Score:2)
Lot of vision behind this one... (Score:2)
Keep the synergy flowing! Anyone know any good replacements for HP laser printers?
sPh
Re:Lot of vision behind this one... (Score:1)
Anyone know any good replacements for HP laser printers?
Lexmark [lexmark.com]has one for $100 (@ OfficeMax). Of course, the replacement toner is $90 a shot, so....
Re:Lot of vision behind this one... (Score:1)
Re:Lot of vision behind this one... (Score:1)
Re:Lot of vision behind this one... (Score:2)
good news for geeks! (Score:5, Funny)
Compaq has a stellar track record, from their sleek designs to their top-of-the-line reliability and support. Their support of the old standby DEC technology has truly been a boon to IT and engineering houses. As I type this, I am using a svelte Compaq tower with a P4 chugging away. This baby is sweet, and runs Linux with nary a hitch.
As for HP, they have demonstrated time and again that they can reign supreme in the realms of laser printing and server mainframes. Their own Unix OS was a champion in its heydey, and with their recent efforts in the Linux world, we have nothing but good things to look forward to from them.
In short, in a few years we will be looking back at this as the beginning of a new era for enterprise technology. Let's hope they keep raising the bar.
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:3, Insightful)
I recently had the joy of setting up an old Compaq server. Win2K, Linux, nothing would run without all sorts of special drivers. Finding them, then getting them to work them was a pain in the ass like a concrete enema.
While I've heard decent things about HP PCs and servers, and I love the Laserjets, I can't help but think Compaq will have a negative effect on HP's altogether decent PC division.
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:2)
I bought Compaq desktops in '97 for work, and couldn't get common hardware to work under WinNT.
I haven't given Compaq a nickel since. The only good thing about that experience is it sent me to the white-box market, which I've discovered is really cool and easy, because they don't mistake corporate inveigling for enhancement.
--Blair
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:2)
'Decent PC division'? I guess that depends on which HP PCs you're talking about. Their Kayak and Visualize Workstations are nice... their Pavilions are wretched heaps.
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:2)
As far as I can tell, HP/Compaq is a merging of an average PC manufacturer and a mediocre one, and I'm not sure exactly what they're going to do together that they couldn't do separately.
As for me, I've decided to buy my computers from either a small screwdriver factory, or Apple. The only large PC manufacturer I'd feel comfortable buying from is Dell.
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:2)
Well, sure, the Alpha's an impressive piece of technology; I wasn't criticizing it, but rather the silliness of a non-chip company buying it. It makes sense for Intel to acquire it, but why Compaq?
Why? How is Dell superior to Compaq, HP, IBM, or any other PC packager?
In my experience (helping support a few hundred workstations), and in the opinions of just about all my coworkers, Dell just makes good machines. They're reliable and they're easy to repair and troubleshoot, primarily because they tend not to use shoddy and/or non-standard parts.
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:2)
actually, they use non-standard power supplies. Don't try and throw another motherboard in there unless you bought it from them. Or unless you plan on upgrading your PSU as well.
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:1)
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:2)
Yes, you've never used a Compaq PC obviously (Score:1)
The only benefit to the geek is that we'll have one less name on our long list of "Avoid these manufacturers..."
Re:good news for geeks! (Score:1)
Or, the parent post is one heck of a troll.
correction (Score:2)
The combined payroll of both companies is 150,000.
Re:correction (Score:2, Funny)
Re:correction (Score:1)
My hope is that somehow, The good basic infrastructure of the PA-RISC systems gets the Alpha processor, HP-UX dies an slow, painful death, then goes to hell, to be replaced by OSF/1(Digital UNIX(Tru64 UNIX)) or Linux, and the unit escapes before the rest goes away.
It could happen. The test unit escaped, so you can still get a decent O-scope... why not the unix side?
I'm sorry but... (Score:2)
a total loss of 15,000 more jobs with over 150,000 following the next two years
It sounded as if a lot of people were against this in the first place - and considering the job losses indicated above, explain to me who exactly is going to benefit from this?!?!?! Why was this a good idea? Both companies' computers are just "eh" to begin with..
Re:I'm sorry but... (Score:3, Insightful)
And you thought that management worked for the shareholders...
Re: (Score:2)
Re:I'm sorry but... (Score:2)
of course (Score:2, Flamebait)
just makes me sick all the anti business stuff on here, lets all go work for the government because they somehow aren't as evil as a business.... then want to explain how America kicks everyones ass in just about everything?
Okay, mod me down, flame on, troll, and all that happy crappy, but after you do that go take Economics 101 at your local place of learning.
Re:of course (Score:3, Insightful)
While the Slashcode moderation system is inherently a good thing, I think, it also serves as a pretty darn good object lesson in Plato's critique of pure democracy.
Re:of course (Score:1)
Are you willing to explore what this twisted version of "free" is, which you claim that others purport? Are you also willing to explain your use of what seems like an arbitrary appeal to authority (ie, Plato's Laws), and why it lends support to your argument?
--Ng
Re:of course (Score:3, Insightful)
Yup. It's not very complicated, and it's also not a new argument.
The BSD license is a good example of a free license, in the traditional sense of free: "Exempt from subjection to the will of others; not under restraint, control, or compulsion; able to follow one's own impulses, desires, or inclinations; determining one's own course of action; not dependent; at liberty." Webster's, 1913.
The GPL, on the other hand, doesn't meet that definition of "free." GPL-licensed software is rife with restrictions. If I want to use GPL'd software in my own project, and not release the source to my own project, I am prohibited from doing this. That, to me, doesn't meet the definition of "free," sense 1, as given by Webster's. Whether the GPL is a good thing or not is a point for another debate. My objection-- at the moment-- is to what I perceive to be the misuse of the word "free" in characterizing that particular license.
Are you also willing to explain your use of what seems like an arbitrary appeal to authority (ie, Plato's Laws), and why it lends support to your argument?
Yeah, but Google does a better job than I could. Finding more information is left as an exercise for the reader.
Plato's Republic contains a dialogue on forms of government, one of which is democracy. The problem with democracy, as defined by and discussed in this dialogue, is that political power rests with individuals who have no responsibility. Democracy, therefore, is fundamentally unstable and rapidly descends into tyranny.
Contrast Socrates's definition of "democracy" with the modern definition of "democracy." Modern democracy is more like what Socrates would have called a republic, although we have long since abandoned the idea of the philosopher-king. Alas.
Slashdot is similar, by analogy. Instead of political power, we're talking about editorial power. In a pure democracy, a charismatic individual could accumulate power by giving the masses what they want to hear, because democracy is based on the idea of positive feedback: you vote for, not against.
On Slashdot, it's possible to accumulate karma (the Slashdot equivalent of political power, although karma carries with it no actual privileges) by giving the masses what they want to hear. Moderators are more likely to moderate comments up than down, so some ideas and patterns become highly moderated regularly.
The old joke goes, "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of these!" This comment, or one like it, appears with virtually every article. Because this particular idea was so over-used, it became a joke. Comments that were once moderated "insightful" are now left unmoderated-- unless they're funny.
Similarly, every story about some software product seems to include at least one comment either applauding the vendor for releasing source code, or deriding the vendor for opposite of same. These comments carry an implied converse, and they get moderated up often enough that an outside observer might conclude that the prevailing opinion on Slashdot is that keeping source code secret is unacceptable. I don't believe that's the most commonly held opinion by Slashdot readers. It just appears that way because of the way moderation works.
The same principle applies to this particular story. Every time an article appears about a corporation, it seems that there appears one or more highly moderated comments on the subject of the "inherent" evils of commercialism or corporations. Again, I don't believe this is the majority opinion among Slashdot readers. It just appears to be because comments that have been moderated up are less likely to be moderated down.
These situations all basically reflect the principles that were laid out thousands of years ago in the Republic: pure democracy, be it political or editorial, is unstable, and leads to tyranny, either social or intellectual.
That's why I said that I would have spent a moderator point-- had I had any at the time-- to support the poster of the comment to which I replied. Contrary opinions are a good thing, and should be encouraged.
In closing, I'd like to let you know that the fact that your post challenged the structure of my post, and not its content, is not lost on me.
Re:of course (Score:2)
'cause we're good little sheep... (the moderator guidelines recommend doing this, as you know).
Comments that were once moderated "insightful" are now left unmoderated-- unless they're funny.
It's much easier to say something funny than to get modded up any other way, in my experience, but maybe that's just the class clown in me.
Personally I try to avoid modding anything down, or modding anything "+1 funny", or modding anything to above 3. Other people are sure to do these things so it's not worth spending my points on.
I'd say something funny about the DecComPaqard trend, but I can't really think of anything. I interned for a summer in Silly Valley at another research lab, and all the summer interns in a particular handful of places (that had this deal with each other) spent a few days going to each of the other companies and seeing "we're doing cool stuff and you should come here next summer, or else whenever it is that you graduate" presentations by various research groups. (Indeed there was some cool stuff.) It's not real funny to think about how many of these groups and labs are still around to work for now.
Re:of course (Score:3, Insightful)
We have laws to try and keep them in check. Laws against abusing monopoly power, requiring companies to be responsible for their actions, and other things to keep them from being totally cut-throat, screw everyone as long as I get my money sort of entities.
I think we have every right to complain when they misbehave and a responsibility as voters and government to keep them in line.
As a small business owner I have other issues to contend with, such as big business making barriers to entry for small businesses and amateurs.
Of course the layoffs are the fault of big business capitalism but the existence of the jobs in the first place is also the fault of big business capitalism.
I'm not sure who or what you are arguing against but saying "if we were all communists like most of you
Only Commies diss Compaq HP merger (Score:2, Insightful)
Gotta run. Have to go rally the proleteriat.
Re:of course (Score:2)
i'm sure the 15,000 people who have been let go in this oh-so-promising tech market are proud to be part of this corporate climate that makes America "kick everyones ass"
America is an OK place. Our employment rate stays reasonably high. Aside from that, the real advantages of America are big guns and cheap gas. There are other nice places to live though.
My real problem with America isn't the government. I think Adam Smith's invisible hand still works (with some modification) in the modern world. America's problem is philosophical. We seem to be so eager to kill ourselves with work in order to buy bigger things. I for one prefer to take less money and have more free time. I'll never have the big house in the suburbs like my parents. But that isn't the only way to live. I have a different American dream.
The suburbs are the worst though. The only advantage of living in the suburbs is it minimizes the necessity of interacting with other people. I'd rather live somewhere where I can walk to the grocery store and the park. I like the freedom my car provides me, but I also like the freedom of not having to drive it all the time. From my (limited) travel and discussions with those abroad, I think other places have a better philosophy as far as communities are concerned.
Struggling to survive (Score:2)
And yes, they seriously were in that position.
If they made a wise decision or not is something for the future. Although some "visionairs" say they know the future of the new company.
There's a saying which could be applied here:
A visionair (or pundit or whatever) is someone who can explain _exactly_ to you why a merger will not work before the merger and when the merger succeeds they can tell you _exactly_ why this success was the unwritten exception on the rule..
Competition (Score:1)
Is it all that good? (Score:4, Interesting)
Right after all the reports about the massive money pit that is AOL and how it is hurting Time Warner why do these companies rush into mergers? And why right after the Enron and Global-Crossing fiascos is no one examining the benefits to the CEOs of the companies? While the Compaq-HP deal was announced last year there was alot of criticism about the benefits to both companies, where has it all gone? Was this a self defense merger? Were the two companies afraid that with out a merger they wouldn't be able to compete with other companies?
Well I suppose I can look foward to good printers being sold with lousy computers and less hope of HP ever having decent Mac support.
As I said, not knowing much about the deal and the two companies, feel free to ignore.
Re:Is it all that good? (Score:2)
Honestly, Compaq was hurting. They were not making money. HP was making money, had money, saw something in Compaq that it wanted, and said, "well, why not?" And the rest is history. I don't really know why Hewlett was so against the merger, probably because he saw a lot of overlap, niches in both companies that would not benefit from the merger. but the pro-merger folks saw beyond that and said, "look, this that and the other thing will be better as a result of this!"
As with any story, there are two sides. As a Compaq employee (until tomorrow! today is Compaq apparel day--break out your compaq and Digital garb and don it for basically the last time),Am I worried as a result of this merger? Yes, not for my job(I'm in a pretty safe area) so much as my personal well-being. I'm certainly uncertain about the future, but everybody here seems to be against this merger, and have a personal vendetta against ms. Fiorina. Why? I think yer all just jealous that she makes more money than you. But in all seriousness, while I have serious doubts about this merger, that's just the skeptic. I'd be delighted to be proved wrong. Most of my cow-orkers are pro-merger, even though it could mean bad things for us on the other side. We'll see.
Re:Is it all that good? (Score:2)
The individuals who set up the mergers make tens or hundred of millions of dollars, Everyone else loses. But that's who set up these mergers. "The people" have no say in this way of doing "business."
AOL lost $54 BILLION !!!!!!
Wasn't this already posted today? (Score:2)
Seriously, the thing I'm curious about is what's going to happen to the Unix divisions? Both HP and Compaq have their own flavors of Unix. Will we see a merging of the two (Join me...and together we will rule the root as father and son!) or will they decide to ditch both, and focus on a FreeBSD-GNU/Linux style solution?
There is some interesting possibilities between these two companies with their development houses and expertise - it all depends on whether they can actually make the good pieces fit together to make a better whole.
Re:Wasn't this already posted today? (Score:1)
Re:Wasn't this already posted today? (Score:2)
It was announced quite some time ago that efforts to port Tru64 Unix to IA-64 were being halted. HPQ will move forward with HPUX running on IA-64 with some juicy bits from Tru64 rolled in. Also, OpenVMS and NonStop NSK are being ported to IA-64 as well.
Jobs dont matter... (Score:2, Interesting)
So it doesn't matter how many jobs are lost or how much restructuring has to be done as long as the investor gets his 'bang for the buck'. In my own opinion, this is a bad idea. But I can see why the shareholders voted for the merger. They just did some simple calculations and figure 'we're gonna get ourselves some big bonuses, and pocket a whole lot of money if we go this route'.
Re:Jobs dont matter... (Score:2)
I also like having a job. It is wrong to assume that the shareholders don't care. It is correct to assume that they entrust there savings and investments in people whom we all pray are doing the best job that they know how to do.
Now there are CEOs who will cut jobs just to make there stock look good but you must be aware that long term investors care very little for short term bounces. Nobody that I know is looking forward to the next year or three in the new HP but from an envestment perspective we hope that ten years from now what is HP will really be a good company to have owned stock in.
From a job perspective, it is inconceivable that the people laying off 15,000 people are not going to have really grim dreams for the next little while.
My point is that regardless of whether this merger was a good or a bad idea, the people who thought it up did so because they felt that it was the best possible choice out of series of really bad options. They deserve the right to see if they can make a go of it.
I only hope I don't loose my job or my envestments loose value in the face of this effort.
Prophetic symbol (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Prophetic symbol (Score:1)
150,000? (Score:2, Informative)
Official??? (Score:3, Insightful)
But if you prefer to start counting at zero, then I guess you might think it's official today ("Day Zero").
But then, I just work for Digital^H^H^H^H^H^H^HCompaq^H^H^H^H^H^HHP...
Wow, 100% layoffs! (Score:1)
Come on dude, read the article. That's 15,000 layoffs in the next two years out of a combined workforce of 150,000. I.e., the combined size of the new company will be about 150,000 employees, of which ~15,000 (10%) will be fired in the next two years.
HP + COMPAQ IBM (Score:5, Insightful)
I would be surprised if it only cost 15 thousand jobs as they have a lot of overlap in products. Consider also that most of this overlap isn't exactly in a profitable area (PC and PC peripheals)
I think its best HP bought Compaq and not the other away around. The key to the merger will be how much control HP maintains over the process...
Re:HP + COMPAQ IBM (Score:3, Insightful)
Prove me wrong, kids.
Re:HP + COMPAQ IBM (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:HP + COMPAQ IBM (Score:2)
Re:HP + COMPAQ IBM (Score:5, Interesting)
Are you sure of that? To me, it looks like the two companies are almost identical. To list:
That's all I can think of off the top of my head, but I know there are many more parallels between the two. The only differences I can recall are HP's printing and networking hardware product lines, for which Compaq doesn't have equals.
Re:HP + COMPAQ IBM (Score:2)
I agree, HP's printing business accounts for the greater share of the company's revenue, and looking at it that way, it is obvious that HP is much larger than Compaq. And yes, there are other product lines in HP's catalogue that Compaq doesn't have (cameras and projectors, as you mentioned, as well as scanners), mostly targetted at consumers. The point I tried to make was that their offerings could be matched item by item (and then some, in HP's case). Basically, HP has acquired a subset of HP, which more than likely will end up in the scrapper, and that oh-so-important-to-Princess-Fiorina services unit. In the end, HewCom PackPaq != HP + Compaq.
JOB LOSS -- "Correction" by Timothy? (Score:2)
Timothy, are you sure you want to make that correction? Your previous statement, while more speculative, may actually be closer to the truth!
HPQ Website (Score:2, Interesting)
15,000 Layoffs you say. (Score:2, Offtopic)
With 15,000 being layed off, it seems the matter of this merger being a "good thing" depends entirely on who you ask.
Employment is a Trailing Indicator (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:15,000 Layoffs you say. (Score:2)
Re:15,000 Layoffs you say. (Score:1)
Yes... yes... I know. I don't have sufficient evidence to prove that either. But I believe in that as a trend, on a general level.
Re:15,000 Layoffs you say. (Score:2)
When the biggest employer in the nation is a temp agency, I don't think you can say that the economy is healthy, at least not any definition of "healthy" that applies to normal people.
Wall Street Seems To Like the New HP...... (Score:1)
Maybe it's a post merger hangover?
Re:Wall Street Seems To Like the New HP...... (Score:2)
That makes two this week. (Score:1, Redundant)
Re:That makes two this week. (Score:1)
"I'm not dead yet"
"I'm getting better"
"I think I might go for a walk"
Of course, then Eric Idle bludgeons him to death, but you never know - HP might just survive. And if it doesn't, it won't be for lack of effort from its workforce (and no, I'm not Carly)
--Ng
Wrong sketch (Score:2)
I'm sure it will be a big success... (Score:2)
Hewlett Compaqard (Score:3, Informative)
And thus... (Score:2, Interesting)
You know, maybe it would be nice for nostalgia's sake to post an article under the Digital logo once in a while. Of course, a small piece of DEC lives on in the Digital Networking Products Group [dnpg.com]. It's a real shame that Compaq cut off the DEC.com and Digital.com domains this year. DEC = 3 letters, Compaq = 6. More to type.
Maybe this signals the need for a mechanism to merge topics of old in the slashcode.
Time to go see if that VAX I booted 9 years ago is still heating, er, running...
Re:And thus... (Score:2)
Er, typing "http://www.digital.com" into my browser takes me to Compaq's website. "http://www.dec.com" takes me to "http://www.openvms.compaq.com", as does "http://www.openvms.digital.com"....
The update is wrong (Score:2)
TWW
Friend's job "eliminated" (Score:2)
Gotta pay those executive bonuses somehow.
Compaq signs coming down (Score:2)
The Day HP Died... (Score:2)
With apologies to Don McLean...
A long, long time ago
I can still remember how computing
used to be worthwhile.
And I knew from the day I was born
that I could make that code perform
and maybe I could do it with some style.
But last September made me shudder,
with every 'nouncement Carly uttered.
Bad news in my In-tray,
I couldn't take one more day.
I can't remember if I sighed when I
read about our latest stride,
something cut me deep inside,
the day the HPWay died.
So
Purge, purge, Ms. Technology Scourge,
Drove my Beetle to the Needle,
Now my job's on the verge.
Them Compaq boys were
drinking Starbuck's and Surge
singing "This'll be the day that we merge,
This'll be the day that we merge."
Did you write the Book of DOS
And do you believe an albatross
Can really save our company?
Now do you believe in buying time?
Can Compaq save our bottom line?
And can you teach me how write a resume?
For all the words in a much better formated way (thanks lameness filter!) go here [netfunny.com]