Mega-ISP Update: Layoffs At AOL, Voices At MSN 186
rfc1394 writes: "There are two articles, the first article, in today's Washington Post, mentioned that AOL, having successfully digested Time Warner, is producing results of that digestion by additionally extruding almost 1,000 people in layoffs due to an anemic advertising market and a need to meet projected revenue goals of about $40 billion.
A separate Post article mentions how Microsoft's online service MSN is having a woman named Shelley Reynolds create a series of spoken identifiers for its online service similar to AOL's famous 'You've got mail!' and identifies El Edwards as the man who is the voice behind the phrase. The second article also tells about the effect of sound on people with respect to technology, and the payments involved (Edwards reportedly got about $100; Reynolds will receive something under six figures.)"
Theses companies are sickening (Score:2)
Re:Theses companies are sickening (Score:1)
Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:2)
Does getting rid of workers increase *revenue*?
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:1)
More details about stock value manipulation (Score:2)
The issue is not how many employees are being laid off, but what services are being outsourced. Oursourcing services such as call centers and HR, as well as IT infastructure management, etc. look on paper the same as layoffs, in that such outsourcing reduces the number of 'Regular Fulltime Employees' thus improving the revenue percentage shown as Earnings per Employee. This is a common practice and we shouldn't be suprised that AOL is making use of them.
--CTH
This is stock value manipulation (Score:3, Informative)
Ping! Ping! Ping! (Score:3, Redundant)
During the boom, even companies that didn't want to grow (that is, wanted to build up existing markets instead of trying to rush into new ones and buy companies, etc.) were pretty much forced into it by shareholder expectations. And now shareholder expectations are working the other way - even solvent companies with working business models are compelled to cut back spending and lay people off, just because that's what "analysts" want to see.
And it will only get worse.
a different interpretation (Score:2, Interesting)
The dotbomb's stock prices were based largely upon speculation. You can't tell me that, a dotcom with P/E ratios in the thousands had stock prices based on the latest quarter's earnings. In these cases, during the "boom," shareholders (again in aggregate) were willing to forego current income in exchange for potential future market dominance.
It's a double-edged sword. If you have a killer plan, but can't get anything going in the near term, why should I invest my money with you? Similarly, if you've got your current market covered, but have no plans for growth in the future, why should anyone new invest?
In the latter case, what happens when your current market disappears (and it will)? You've got no company, and my stock is worth zilch.
A viable company has to have both a current value proposition, and a speculative function operating simultaneously, and the market will reward both.
Re:a different interpretation (Score:2, Insightful)
After three years, and no real signs of profitability, I'd suggest that many people viewed it as a failure of execution, and pulled out on that basis. The dotbombs, for the most part, had nothing BUT long term plans, and couldn't make their short-term goals work out. Hence, they got punished. Hard.
One analysis is that the quarterly earnings aren't pulled out of the sky, but are, in fact, negotiated with the analysts over time. You can reposition those numbers as you need to (earnings warnings, etc.), and so long as a company isn't delivering any surprises, they should be OK. The problem lies when the market is surprised by a number, it tends to overreact.
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:1)
that story is at the register [theregister.co.uk].
----rhad
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:2)
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:1)
Stupid NY Daily News, changing their MS ASP's around like that.
Re:Layoffs = increasing revenue? (Score:2)
Well, it depends on the company, really. If they all thought this way, none of them would succeed.
voices (Score:2, Funny)
We can send emails with MPEG attachments to the sys admins of the sites brought to their knees by /. links.
"You've been slashdotted."
Even juggernauts bleed. (Score:1)
Shelley Reynolds (Score:1)
El Edwards: You've Got Payments! (Score:3, Informative)
El Edwards (Score:4, Interesting)
"Who could have foreseen something like this happening," said Elwood Edwards. "Years ago my wife worked at AOL and asked me to record the greetings for the company. Now, as I think about the millions of AOL members who consider me as the 'mailman' of cyberspace, I'm amazed. I'm pleased that I've had a small part in making the computer world smaller and more personable."
Edwards has recently started his own business doing voice-overs for commercial and business broadcasts, radio and television. More information about Elwood Edwards and his voice-over services can be found at his Website:
http://members.aol.com/voicepro.
Re:El Edwards (Score:2)
Finally AOL dose something intelligent (Score:1)
A voice for f1rst p0st (Score:1)
Then again, my soundcard cannot handle more that 64 samples at once...
Didn't AOL used to be an ISP? (Score:1)
Since AOL Time Warner now owns Time magazine, I have already cancelled my subscription, and very clearly stated that I was doing it because of their monopolistic practices.
Luddites at MS? (Score:1)
Re:Luddites at MS? (Score:2)
Some Needed Msft spoken phrases (Score:5, Funny)
"This application has performed an illegal operation and will be shutdown"
"Please wait"
"Would you like to reboot now?"
"We are going to MSN today"
"I'm sorry Dave, I can't do that".
you forgot one (Score:1, Flamebait)
"Error: The operation has completed successfully"
or is that already sufficiently fscked up?
voices (Score:1)
Easier solution (Score:3, Funny)
http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=01/07/31/133
El Edwards (Score:2, Informative)
Hmmm. (Score:3, Funny)
Ed...
"You've got screwed!"
Re:Hmmm. (Score:2)
I think he's got the last laugh... ;-)
"You've got rich!"
-earl
Re:Hmmm. (Score:1)
Other Famous Computer Voice (Score:1)
(She also played Lwaxana Troi in STTNG)
Re:Other Famous Computer Voice (Score:1)
Re: (Score:2, Flamebait)
Re:Lawsuits... (Score:1)
Vinson Massif
Re:Lawsuits... (Score:2)
Re: (Score:1)
Re:Lawsuits... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Lawsuits... (Score:2)
I cant wait for AOL to sue Micros~1 for saying "You've got mail".
They already tried [thestandard.com]. They lost.
Wav file installed with IIS (Score:2, Funny)
CodeRed.WAV "You've got worms!"
Another link (Score:2)
Re:Another link (Score:2)
Boy is he sneaky.
Only in Bill Gates world (Score:1)
StupidNewMailSound=new File("C:\AOHell\gotmail.wav");
if(mail) {
StupidNewMailMessage.play();
}
(More Code Goes Here)
IANAL, but I think this would work because Microsoft will not be distributing the sound. Then microsoft would instantly have the power of the "You've Got Mail" guy.
Re:Only in Bill Gates world (Score:1)
if (not $article_read) {
post($stupid_pseudocode);
bash(qw(Micro$oft Microshaft Microsquish Microhard Microsuck M$ MS Billy-Boy BillG));
karma += 3;
}
Re:Only in Bill Gates world (Score:1)
Layoffs Surprising? I think not... (Score:1, Insightful)
Re:Layoffs Surprising? I think not... (Score:1)
Something Missing (Score:2)
I found it odd to read an article on the internet, extolling the virtues of human voices instead of just the written word, and it contained no way to actually HEAR Shelley Reynold's voice! I mean, they could at least have provided links to somewhere on MSN's web site or even to a home page for her where people could check out her portfolio. I found myself wondering, "Just WHAT does she sound like?" but, I am NOT so interested as to sign up for MSN to find out! Can anyone provide links so we can hear what all the talk is about?
Re:Something Missing (Score:1)
Re:Something Missing (Score:1)
Re:Something Missing (Score:1)
I'm glad it's free, but unfortunately it didn't seem to run on Linux very well. She should consider using more of a cross-platform voice or something...
Re:Something Missing (Score:2)
geek voice-overs (Score:3, Funny)
"Dude,
netscape layoffs? (Score:1)
They had a big fat zero jobs openings posted as of today, out of the 100+ across all of AOL (excluding Time-Warner). My knee-jerk reaction is to ask what how badly this is going to muck up in-house Mozilla development.
Truth in advertising (Score:3, Funny)
Now remember (Score:1)
Seriously though, these seems like a lot of rationalization to justify pinching AOL's approach to their service. Not that AOL came up with it, but MSN seems like its trying hard to be AOL in drag.
One more thing: wasn't the voice of the Borg female? I forget...
Poor guy... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Poor guy... (Score:1)
Back in the early-to-mid-90's, I lived the slacker life in Austin (I realize nowadays, Austin is too hip to be hip anymore, which is one of the reasons it's been overpopulated by refugees from San Francisco, and is also is one of the reasons I left, but I digress). One of my best friends was a diligent worker at Ruby's BBQ, a local barbeque joint with one location and no plans for expansion. At the time, the place was located adjacent to Antone's blues club (the blues club has since relocated to downtown, and Antone has since relocated to federal prison [usdoj.gov]) and Ruby's BBQ was open until 3am on weekends. This, combined with the Texas liquor laws requiring bars to close at 2am, led to a lot of business for Ruby's, and a lot of Antones' drunken patrons vomiting up a lot of perfectly good beef brisket and sausage. Now, my good friend (I'll call him Scott) had the good/mis-fortune of working at Ruby's almost every Friday and Saturday night (bad because he didn't get off until late, and good because after he got off, he usually stayed up until dawn drinking out of Rubys' beer cooler). Well anyway, one night while ol' Scott was working the late-night shift, this young feller walks in, drunk off his ass. He's waiting in line, joking with his friends, and doing absolutely spectacular impressions of Beavis and Butthead, and Anderson (don't forget the time period this is taking place in). I mean, not only are the voices spot-on, but the observations being made in character are absolutely uproarious. This fellow gets to the head of the line, proceeds to order a combo sandwich [rubysbarbecue.com] in Anderson's voice, and moves off to wait for his order to be fulfilled. Upon speaking with the other members of his party, this fellow turns out to be a personage no less than Mike Judge himself. He eventually receives his order, goes to his table, and proceeds to regale his companions with hilarious (to the sober) impressions of the decor at Ruby's, the food at Ruby's, and the overpriced, talentless acts booked by Antone, all in the voices of the characters of America's best-loved cartoon show (Power Puff Girls were still several years away).
Well, that's pretty much the whole story. Sorry I'm not like the classic Deep South narrator (well thish-yer Smiley)...maybe you had to be there to appreciate it.
Re:Poor guy... (Score:2)
Could be worse. Imagine what Shelly Reynolds' [gal for the new MSN voiceovers] husband has to not think of during sex.
Re:Poor guy... (Score:2, Funny)
priorities? (Score:3, Interesting)
I guess we can see where the press' priorities are.
Well, good for AOL. (Score:2)
Re:Well, good for AOL. (Score:2, Funny)
It is more likely to be the case that they are firing their technical staff. Sales and marketing generate revenue, everyone else is overhead...
Audio decibel? (Score:5, Funny)
What kind of non-sentence is that? Isn't that like saying that a bouler has "a certain mass kilogram"?
Re:Audio decibel? (Score:2)
FWIW, I find the definition of boulder [dictionary.com] to be quite interesting: "A large rounded mass of rock lying on the surface of the ground or embedded in the soil". Why not just say "a large rounded mass of rock", and leave it at that?
Flying Boulders (Score:1)
Re:Audio decibel? (Score:1)
Re:Audio decibel? (Score:1)
But what would you think the diffrence between a rock and a stone is?
and what about pebbles?
It's funny I looked up the definitions of all these 2 weeks ago.
Re:Audio decibel? (Score:2)
It becomes a Wile E. Coyote-seeking missle.
Actually, no :) (Score:2)
I fear I still have to correct the physics of it. The decibel unit isn't a unit per se; it's 1/10th of a bel. A bel is a logarithmic quantity: it means you express a unit logarithmically. In effect, a 60 decibels (6 bels) sound is ten times louder than a 50 decibels sound. So, the words 'audio decibel' aren't that stupid.
Now, my physics courses are far behind me, but I believe the 'real' unit behind sound is joules, used to express the energy of the mass of air displaced by a sound. Or something like that anyway.
MSN spoken identifiers. (Score:5, Funny)
AOL: "You've got mail!"
MSN/Win9x: "You've got mail! Now go tell your friends to use MSN! [zdnet.com].
MSN/WinXP: "You've got mail! Click here to pay $0.35 to read the first 1024 characters..."
Re:MSN spoken identifiers. (Score:2)
Actually, that's what a lot of people were hoping that the judge was going to tell Billy the G.
MSN Spoken Identifiers (Score:5, Funny)
New AOL Spoken Identifier (Score:2, Funny)
Okay there, Shelley. (Score:5, Funny)
I think Ms. Reynolds has taken a few too many positive hits herself.
Re:Okay there, Shelley. (Score:2)
Probably better known to the younger of you as the voice for the cartoon character "Garfield" (the cat), a casting decision I wish they hadn't made, 'cause it ruined my memories of Carleton, and wasn't a voice with which I would have associated with Garfield before they animated him.
Re:Okay there, Shelley. (Score:1)
Must be inflation (Score:4, Interesting)
I remember when Microsoft used to pay college professors [chronicle.com] only $200 to talk about them.
Spoken identifiers (Score:5, Funny)
MSN- "You've got mail, are you sure you want to read it?"
USER- *click yes*
MSN- "Are you sure?"
USER- *click yes again*
MSN- "You must reboot"
Re:Spoken identifiers (Score:2)
>USER- *click yes*
>MSN- "Are you sure?"
>USER- *click yes again*
>MSN- "You must reboot"
Unless, of course, it contains a .vbs attachment, in which case it's automatically opened with a cheery:
"Hello! Someone send you this file to get your advice!"
Look at James Earl Jones... (Score:2)
James Earl Jones got $1mil (I think?) just to say "CNN" for the CNN network comercials....
Man I wish I had a voice speaking job....
Re:Look at James Earl Jones... (Score:2)
This isn't new... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:This isn't new... (Score:2, Funny)
possible open source impact? (Score:2)
Any idea whether this will have an effect on Mozilla [mozilla.org] or the Open Directory Project [dmoz.org]?
Tim
ISPs should stay ISPs, not 'content providers' (Score:2)
But if even specialist content companies like Salon - whose only purpose is to provide content and make money from adverts - find it hard to survive, what's the point in service providers wasting resources on that too?
An ISP provides a certain level of service, for which you pay a fixed monthly subscription - which isn't subject to the whims of the advertising market. What's wrong with sticking to a tried and tested formula?
(Okay, so this is AOL, and they feel they have to do *something* to exploit those users who don't change their browser home page... but I still wish they wouldn't bother.)
Female voiceovers are very expensive (Score:2)
She's so easy no wonder she's number one! (Score:1)
Re:i wonder......... (Score:2)
Probably nobody, I mean, "yuulghvv gllk mmallll" probably violates some parental control setting...
Another breakup (Score:2)
Re:What a character (Score:1)
Re:Six Figures!?!?!?!?! (Score:4, Informative)
MSN is getting a bargain.
Re:Six Figures!?!?!?!?! (Score:1)
"You're a very silly man, and I'm not going to read you your email."
Re:Six Figures!?!?!?!?! (Score:2)
Hey well maybe people will not use MSN because you'll have to download 10,000 2MB .wav files just so you can hear your name... then again maybe not and the hard drive people will again make a killing ... ahhhh people are sheep :)
P.S. Before you flame the 2MB thing is a joke: although you never know with M$
Re:Six Figures!?!?!?!?! (Score:2)
Did you know he's actually a twin? The other one is Lemonjello (le-MAHN-zhe-low).
Re:I want the voice of SAL from 2010. (Score:1)
Re:Ralph Wiggum (Score:1)