ComputerWorld's Help Form Elicits Some Laughs 85
PetManimal writes "Like many websites, Computerworld has a 'help' Web form for users to submit website-related questions. The page asks people not to ask about general Web problems, or other issues not related to Computerworld, but that hasn't stopped a regular stream of funny submissions, ranging from a question about using a computer to watch soap operas, to questions about troubleshooting printer problems."
Not funny. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
Re:Not funny. (Score:1)
Re:Not funny. (Score:5, Funny)
Why sad? Sounds like he's mentally a perfect fit for pro sports already.
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
Re:Not funny. (Score:1)
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
<table> and <font>, then?
Re:Not funny. (Score:1)
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
Re:Not funny. (Score:3, Insightful)
The problem with the internet is that you have no way to tell if a message came for a 7 year-old kid, someone who is mentally handicapped, some foreigner who can hardly understand the language, etc. I certainly don't believe those messages are representative of the public at large.
Re:Not funny. (Score:4, Insightful)
I certainly don't believe those messages are representative of the public at large.
You need to meet more people. :-)
Re:Not funny. (Score:3, Funny)
"I had a big meeting, but had no blank paper to write on! It was an emergency! After a quick Google, I found your site and sure enough after reading the FAQ's and online manual, boom, there was a blank sheet of paper for me to use from the printer! Thanks
Re:Not funny. (Score:2)
# v. 0.9 -- Did not print blank sheet
# v. 1.0 -- Printed slightly non-blank sheet.
# v. 1.1 -- Printed all black sheet -- getting closer!
# v. 1.2 -- Fire!
# v. 1.3 -- Printed text to "O Solo Mio", don't understand why.
# v. 1.4 -- New version 50% more blank.
# v. 1.5 -- Improved speed, 62% faster.
# v. 1.6 -- "unitray" support -- eliminated need to retrieve paper from output tray,
Should replied to the lotto winner (Score:3, Insightful)
Help the concept of seperating a fool from his money
Re:Should replied to the lotto winner (Score:1)
"In order to safeguard your identity please send the payment to me and I will then send it on to the destination"
oh, and these are pretty standard - sorry, I did hear a funny one from my brother who was warned that one of the execs in his company were going after him because 'Microsoft Word asked him if he wanted to save a document and he said no but then changed his mind and it should have saved a copy anyway just in case'. You have to wonder how some people reach those kinds of career hei
reminds me of.... (Score:5, Funny)
Programming is race between Programmers, to produce idiot proof apps, and God, to create better idiots.
So far God is winning.
Re:reminds me of.... (Score:5, Insightful)
Of course, since idiots get into programming too.
Check the Daily WTF if you want exemples : http://thedailywtf.com/ [thedailywtf.com]
Re:reminds me of.... (Score:3, Insightful)
Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:1)
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:2)
Not to mention who's never sent an IM to the wrong person when getting confused with so many tabs or windows, some of these seem to just be that except with web forms.
Untill you're perfect stop pointing fingers and being a dick. If you ever become perfect you ma
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:2)
He has a point. I see a huge amount of posts on here that get modded +5 Insightful that are about as stupid with respect to real life as some of these people are with technology. Take even an intro course in economics and then read slashdot (at +5 even) and you'll have a good laugh about how stupid some people here are. Anyone with any experience in debating will be amused by how poor the discourse it here. And let's not even mention political discussion here.
Hell, even in the technology field, many post
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:1)
the spyware on my brain caught the following thought...
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:5, Funny)
Well for one, I'm not a fucking moron. From an email in the article:
That's barely even English. I'm surprised that dumbass can even breath. My 6 year old neice writes better than that. That guy shouldn't be allowed to operate a fork, much less a computer.
And you know what the difference between brain surgery and using a computer is? Billions of fucking idiots think they're fully qualified to use a computer. They should consider themselves lucky they're only being mocked, cause it should be illegal to be that stupid.
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:2)
Truely, but not likely to passed into law (especially by Ted Stevens!), as all of the congresscritter's internets are getting clogged up in the tubes- arriving days late.
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:1, Insightful)
That's barely even English. I'm surprised that dumbass can even breath.
Oh, the irony.
Re:Its more like it makes me feel like... (Score:1)
I really think you're taking this way too personally. I used to work in IT at my university, first supporting students who actually brought their computers in, then supporting computers, faculty, and staff with their networking problems over the phone. EVERYBODY has problems and calls us. The very few 1337 folk who didn't were either people who actually knew what they were doing (read: extremely small minority composed almost entirely of my computer science bretheren) or wannabes that we would have to shut
You don't know my brother. (Score:1)
You don't know my brother.
Funny? (Score:1)
Re:Funny? (Score:1)
Missing operating system... (Score:2)
See http://support.microsoft.com/default.aspx?scid=kb; en-us;321626 [microsoft.com]
I remember it from installing Linux on a DOS system some years back and markting the Linux partition active without having installed LILO on the boot block.
Re:Missing operating system... (Score:2)
Re:Missing operating system... (Score:2)
My experience (Score:5, Funny)
I have my email address on my web site as well as a FAQ for a certain model of cell phone. I get all sorts of drivel as email.
Just yesterday I got someone asking about functionality for a different model. The message stream looked something like this:
Him: How do I foo with model 5000?
Me: I don't know. I only have a 200.
Him: So how do I do it with the 5000?
Me: Quote first email. Point out again that I don't know as I only have a 200.
Him: I have a 5000.
At that point I gave up.
Re:My experience (Score:1)
Mark: Now you see the problem with water beds is that they have these waves like this, Right? But you see this water bed is special, you see? It has no waves.
Stevo: Why didn't you just get a normal bed... that has no waves?
Mark: But this HAS no waves.
This is supposed to be funny? (Score:2, Funny)
Wtf? On /. a post like this wouldn't even be worth a -1 Offtopic mod point.
Anyone who has ever worked in customer support/public relations has heard far, far more humorous (and serious) help requests. (Remember the story about a
Re:This is supposed to be funny? (Score:1)
I rather enjoyed the lottery question though. Thinking of starting such 'send in $500 to claim your $283 prize' lottery business myself.
Re:This is supposed to be funny? (Score:2)
Even funnier computer stories (Score:3, Funny)
True story.... (Score:3, Funny)
Another true st
Instructions. (Score:3, Informative)
"Turn right[,] here."
and
"Turn[,] right here."
This is Nothing... (Score:2, Interesting)
Been there ... (Score:2)
Re:Been there ... (Score:5, Interesting)
I wish I'd known earlier. About 10 years ago I used to work with a guy called Kemp Watson and he asked me to grab watson.com for him. I did and handled mail for him.
I'd get bounces for such-and-such@watson.com from IBM and it was obvious that wonks at ibm were sending to @watson.com not @watson.ibm.com (the IBM Thomas Watson research center).
I kept writing to IBM to ask them to wake the fuck up, no no avail.
Finally when I got one that was about nuclear secrets, for your eyes only etc, I got a call back, explaied the problem and never saw another one, ever.
Re:Been there ... (Score:2)
They may have been typing jdoe@watson, and the assumption is that the TLD will be appended, so they end up with jdoe@watson.ibm.com.
If their email/DNS is misconfigured, and appends just
Re:Been there ... (Score:2)
I had a similar situation (with the culprit's identity masked, to protect the "innocent"). I registered <name>.com in '96. A couple of years later, a company named <name> started up and, being unable to get <name>.com, settled for <name>-inc.com.
As you may have guessed, I began receiving misdirected mail
Re:Been there ... (Score:2)
Not News (Score:1)
This story is not news to ANYONE who's ever been a part of any sort of organization that maintained a public email address. I don't get it.
Now I can retire for the evening... (Score:1)
some prob in my PC, send yuor man to check it out, i unable to use internet.
thanks
Somehow that phrase, "send your man to check it out" really made me laugh. The computer science student, on the other hand...wow, how sad.
hmmm (Score:1)
OMfg!!1
wwere were you computr guy out?im sod runk. bet night ever wooo!
AOL front line on the late nite wierdo shift (Score:5, Funny)
guy: I want to start an online business.
me: Try keyword Busines, just type...
guy: Actually first I wanted to check out other businesses first.
me: O-Kay...
guy: The most successful online business are porn aren't they...
me:
guy: Soo.. I was wondering if you could help me find some...
Is /, trying to be Digg? (Score:1)
ROFLMAO LOLOL!
Re:Is /, trying to be Digg? (Score:1)
Shows the sorry state of search engines (Score:1)
Its all about lets get our site in the top ten for the largest number of keywords possible.
probably computerworlds site came up when someone searched for baseball scout,soap operas etc...
Also check the access.log (Score:3, Funny)
Comment removed (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:It's also somewhat disturbing (Score:2)
Re:It's also somewhat disturbing (Score:2)
That ofcause assume that you are writting in you native tongue and not some foreign language (as I am doing now).
I just wis
Re:It's also somewhat disturbing (Score:2)
Re:It's also somewhat disturbing (Score:2)
Please remember that only those who can't do will send those emails. What about people who are perfectly fine using their computer systems? You and I don't hear about them.
That's called skewed statistics.
I get these too (Score:1)
I also once made a fake homepage for Tony Blair, deliberately designed to look as fake as possible, while matching several criteria for being genuine from a pa
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re: (Score:1)
Re: (Score:2)
Can you print the website for me? (Score:1)