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User Journal

Journal Journal: Polyamory 6

I've waited to write about this until I was sure things were going well. It seems they are, but of course this is still just the beginning and there are many hurdles and stages yet to come.

My wife and I define ourselves as polyamorous. This despite the fact that we've been together for seven years where she has had one short term and unsatisfying affair, and I haven't had any.

She met a very nice man while volunteering in our local community theater, asked me if she could pursue him, and I said yes. They have hit it off quite well. It's been three weeks and they've gotten to the stage where they can admit to "being in love" but not yet saying, "I love you."

I won't go into all the details, suffice it to say this has been a win-win-win scenario for all parties involved, for various reasons (some of them quite sad, but confidentiality prevents me from talking too much about that.)

My wife's and my relationship had been in the doldrums for about six months prior. This has not only revitalized it: it has entered a whole new phase. I feel like the man I was seven years ago, before I made this woman my project.

She has graduated from the school of Seth with flying colors, and I no longer feel inappropriately responsible for her. I won't go into all the mother issues I've been dragging around with me that have caused me to feel it necessary to fix and protect women at my own expense, and I won't claim they are entirely gone, either. They do have much less of a hold over me, though.

For the last three weeks, we have a had a fully adult, interdependent relationship. Everything is open to negotiation, and we both feel comfortable stating our needs to the other where we once might have felt guilty about being who we are and wanting what we want.

Her paramour has never done anything like this, so it's all new and a bit scary for him. I knew and liked him from before the affair started, but we have yet to sit down and have a man-to-man about it. I decided to follow Jenny's lead on this (I'm no longer the teacher and leader, yay!) and she thought it best to wait a bit and see how serious this was before committing to something uncomfortable like that.

He doesn't even know what compersion is, for goodness sake.

Me, I've had training in all this. Six months of twice a week classes. Practice three ways. God damn Hawaii is a cool place! Not that I'm not nervous, I have the most to lose if things go wrong. Although he has the most likelihood of being hurt in that scenario.

I have always felt like a different person in a serious relationship than out of one. Now I just feel like myself, in a way I never really knew before. I'm doing more of the things I love to do and not worrying about other people when it isn't necessary. My wife is actually hoping I meet a woman that I can connect with, but I'm not actively looking, just doing more of the things I love and keeping an eye open to the possibilities.

More updates as events unfold. Will it go well? Will it all blow up in our faces? Who knows, but it sure is exciting!

User Journal

Journal Journal: Weird religious "pray for the heathens" program on freshmeat 6

Salvation Focus 0.99
  by geekforGod - Wed, Feb 7th 2007 09:26 PDT

About: Salvation Focus is a Web application meant to assist groups in focusing their prayers on individuals whose beliefs do not conform to the beliefs of the group. Salvation Focus makes administration simple and allows the administrators to keep track of the information of the people who submitted the non-believer's name for prayer.

Scary.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Libertarianism: horrid yet banal 20

I posted this yesterday, it's my best anti-libertarian screed yet, so I thought I'd save it in my journal.

Hey, if you do not like the social contract you were born into, you are free to leave and find a country where you can be your own selfish self. Similar to how, in a libertarian/anarcho capitalist world, people who aren't of the owning class are free to leave and support themselves somewhere else. Of course in this world, as it exists only in the fantasies of libertarians and anarcho capitalists, due to some magical unexplained process, everyone is and always will be a member of the owning class, and no one will ever have to sell themselves into slavery just to have a place to sleep.

Libertarianism is based on a falsehood. The inalienable property rights espoused by libertarians are just as authoritarian and represent just as much of an initiation of force as anything done by a government. Before you mingle your labor with a thing, there is no justification for you to call that thing your own. Yet in order to mingle your labor with a natural resource, you must first claim it as your own. yet you do so without justification. As that natural resource was freely shareable by all, you have stolen from all by your taking. That is initiation of force, and libertarianism is founded on it.

It is based on another falsehood: that every individual is an island unto themselves, and that barring some kind of court challenge, nothing anyone does can be said to impact anyone else. The fact is, everything you do impacts everything else. Therefore, any decision or action you take is the concern of every other human being on the planet. You have a responsibility to the rest of humanity, because we all need to live together and cooperate to make society work.

Libertarianism seems to be designed as a system for keeping the have-nots from challenging the supremacy of the haves. It is a philosophy (and I use that term loosely) that places selfishness as the ultimate good, and denies that the individual has any responsibility to society.

It bases it's ideas of Rights on the fallacy of appeal to authority, rather than acknowledging that rights come not from Nature or your invisible friend in the sky, but from people's agreement to uphold those rights in others. Rights derive from society. Without society, there would be no need to even speak of rights.

It appeals to intellectual snobs who see themselves as better than the common person. These people feel their brilliance is not properly rewarded, and they are being imposed upon by all the lesser men around them. Libertarianism tells them they are correct, and that they are valient individualists fighting Authority by pursuing their selfish fantasies.

In short, libertarianism is an evil and destructive philosophy of selfishness that appeals to snobs with an over-inflated sense of their own importance. It's practitioners posses a level of intellectual dishonesty and hypocricy that I've only ever seen before in Scientologists. It has taken the noble roots of anarchism and twisted them into something unfathomably horrid, yet banal at the same time.

Slashdot.org

Journal Journal: Modpoints again 2

Don't know what I did to get mod points again, or why I didn't have them for over a year, but I have modpoints. If anyone wants to point out posts especially deserving of praise (I don't mod down) let me know. They expire on the 30th.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Flame On! 5

Whoops. I made the mistake of posting something less positive than "gentoo is teh r0xx0rs! Wooot!" in a story about gentoo. Although that comment wasn't modded down, several of mine below it were, and more people marked me as a foe because of it than for anything else I've posted, including any of my "property is theft" posts! It's been a few years since I was involved with gentoo at all, I guess I forgot how absolutely frothing gentoo fanatics can be.

Take a look at funroll-loops.org for a humorous take on gentoo as rice.

That being said, I love gentoo. When I first realized the power of portage, I was floored. I spent weeks recompiling my system, not because I couldn't get it to work, but just for the fun of making it just like I wanted, and then making it a little better. If you want to learn the nuts and bolts of your Linux system, it's great.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Moderation System is Down 7

What's up with the meta moderation system? It's been asking me to meta moderate for two days, but every time I click the link, it says the moderation system is down. And I've seen stuff being moderated during that time. Has anyone else had this issue?

As a related aside, it's been over a year since I've had mod points. I still have excellent karma, and haven't done anything different than I have for the past ten years here. I think all my anti-libertarian ranting must have pissed off one of the editors. You know how those liberatrians are, they're all like "Oooh, my rights! my rights!" then they stab you in the back for disagreeing with them.

It's funny.  Laugh.

Journal Journal: Joke of the day 4

(Don't blame me, they started it.)

A small town gets a new bell and bell tower for their church, and so the pastor needs to hire someone to ring it. He puts some fliers around town, and waits for applicants, but no one shows up. Finally one Saturday he hears a knock at the door. Opening it, he finds a guy with no arms, who says, "Father, it's always been my dream to ring bells, but I lost both my arms in the war. Please, Father, can you give me a chance? I kow I can find a way to do it!" The pastor decides to let him try, and the go into the bell tower, past the bell pull and up to the top, where the guy squares off in front of the bell. He runs and dives into it face first. Bong! Getting up, face all bloody, he staggers back and leaps at the bell again. Bong! Now the pastor is aghast and the guy is barely conscious, but he gets up and leaps again, misses the bell completely, flies over the edge and plummets to his death. The pastor runs downstairs where a crowd is gathered around. They ask him, "Father, did you know this man?" And he says, "No, but his face sure rings a bell."

So the pastor still doesn't have a bell ringer. He puts more fliers out, and waits. Finally there's a knock at the door, and who should it be but another guy with no arms. The guy says, "Father, me and my brother served in the war together, we both lost our arms in the same fight. He always wanted to ring bells. As we were lying, armless, in that bloody foxhole, he made me promise that if he died, I'd ring bells for him. So I have to give it a try. The pastor says, "okay, but just don't use your face." So they go into the bell tower, past the bell pull, and up to the top. The guy squares off with the bell and gives it a mighty kick. Bong! The pastor looks pleased. The guys kicks again. Bong! But the bell swings back and knocks him off the bell tower and he plummets to his death. Horrified, the pastor runs down where a crowd has gathered round and they ask him, "Father, did you know this man?" And he says, "No, but he's a dead ringer for his brother."

User Journal

Journal Journal: SuSE and VMWare comedy of errors

We are using VMWare ESX 2.5.3 on IBM blade servers hosting SuSE linux. We just upgraded to 2.5.3 so we could use x86_64, only to find out that the processors in our boxes aren't stepping D or above. So we need to upgrade, in the meantime I am told to install SuSE 10.1 for our new WebSense logging system. I grab all the .iso files, and put them on the host. Make a virtual CD and connect the .iso for disk 1. Boot up, start the install, it gets to where it would normally ask for disk 2 and I would switch the file using VirtualCenter, and the stupid thing begins post installation and tries unsuccessfully to reboot itself. No mention of this problem on the SuSE or VMWare boards, wtf?

UPDATE: Using lilo instead of grub fixed the problem.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Saving These Posts

Funny enough to save, IMNSHO.

What is the fascination with the Librarian Party? (Score:3)
by Hamster Lover (558288) * on Tuesday May 02, @04:28PM (#15250061)
(Last Journal: Friday July 11, @03:17PM)

Seriously. OK, they like books, but really, what else have they got going for them?

-----

Gather Round, Young'ens! Grampa's Got A Story! (Score:2)
by spun (1352) on Tuesday May 02, @05:18PM (#15250340)
(Last Journal: Thursday April 27, @06:02PM)

Well, son, take a seat and let me tell you 'bout the good ol' days. Back before there was this new fangled world wide web, we had this place called Usenet which was kinda like you young'ins web forums, only all in text and kinda all jumbled together. It evolved from something that came before the Internet even, UUCP, which was Unix to Unix Copy protocol, though it wasn't only used by unix, you see? (zzzzzz... zzzz... zznork?) Where was I?

Anyways, all these old timey bulletin boards (We called 'em BBSs back then) would all dial each other up over regular old phone lines and forward stuff on at pre-arranged intervals. All of them freely associating created a kind of world wide forum without the need for any of this fancy infrastructure we have now. It was kinda like anarchy in action, but each little bulliten board owner was god of his entire domain, see? (zzzzz.. zzzz... zzwhuh?)

Who took my meds? Nurse! Anyways, that situation got some o' them early sysadmins and BBS users to thinking. The more moon-headed of them got it in their heads that the whole world should be that way, no, in fact, would be that way, because of computers. And modems, and telephone lines, and, them, of course.

And then they all started read Ayn Rand. And then the seventh seal was broken, and we all wore an onion on our belt, as was the style of the time.

The rest, as they say, is history. (zzzzzz... damkidsgetoffmylawn... zzzz... zzzz...)

User Journal

Journal Journal: OSS Friendly Hosting Recommendations? 9

Anyone know any decent web hosting providers? I'm looking for a basic host that can provide MySQL, Perl, PHP, access to apache log files, POP3, and a full shell with SSH access. So far I'm thinking Hurricane Electric's starter package at $9.95/mo with 1GB storage and 25GB traffic is my best option. Any thoughts? I'm especially looking for companies with a history of 1.) good technical support and 2.) supporting open source software.

User Journal

Journal Journal: New Job 2

Well, after leaving my last employer over a contract dispute I have a new job, working for New Mexico's Child, Youth and Family Department. Guess what OS they run all their servers on? Linux of course. They run a web filter, a custom Sybase application for case management, a collaborative LAMP based Intranet, and a Linux based SAN. My first task is to migrate the Intranet from MySQL 3.23/Apache 1.x/PHP 4.x to the latest versions. Things are pretty laid back. I love me a gub'mint job!

Oh, and not to brag, but my recruiter had me take RedHat's online test first and I'm in the 93rd percentile.

Linux Business

Journal Journal: End of Federal Fiscal Year Finally Complete!

Woo hoo! It's over. Six clusters delivered. One fifteen node, one nineteen node, one eight node, one twelve node and one monster 64 node blade cluster. Three using infiniband networking and three using gigabit ethernet. The eight node cluster sounds like the smallest until you know that the nodes each have 4 dual core AMD chips and 32 gigabytes of memory. All put together under alloted time while still shipping our usual assortment of Linux diskless clients and miscellaneous servers.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Conservatives have taken over slashdot 6

I have noticed that recently, moderation on slashdot has taken on an increasingly right wing flavor. People get modded down for stating facts that are inconvenient to the right wing. This isn't happening all the time, yet, but it seems to be happening more and more often. Right wing comments, no matter how asinine, get modded up. Sigh. I think the low quality of slashdot in general has driven most of the intelligent people away. Much more of this and I'll be gone too.

Role Playing (Games)

Journal Journal: Morrowind: The Elder Scrolls III GOTY Edition 2

About a month ago, the wife dragged me to Target after work because she needed some new bras. Amazing how long it can take a woman to pick out undergarments. I was killing time looking at their meager supply of computer games when I saw one that looked interesting, Morrowind: The Elder Scrolls III Game of the Year Edition. Hmmm, game of the year? A great looking RPG plus two expansion packs for $20? How could I go wrong?

I got home and installed it, noticing that it also came with a complete construction kit. I read the manual while waiting for it to install and found the character system interesting. Like many paper RPGs nowadays it uses a hybrid class/skills system with levels. Now I'm a big fan of GURPS with it's classless, no-levels system of character points, but this looked intriguing.

You can use a pregenerated class or create your own by choosing a specialty of combat, magic or stealth, two favored attributes out of the list of strength, endurance, intelligence, willpower, speed, agility, personality and luck. You then choose five major and five minor skills from a list of about 30 skills, each of which is governed by a different attribute.

You also choose a race and birth sign for your character. Races include Altmer, or High Elves who are good at magic but vulnerable to many kinds of elemental attacks, Argonians, a lizard-man type race; Bosmer, or Wood Elves, a short crafty race, great with a bow and not bad with a lockpick either; Bretons, a human race of potent magic users; Dunmer, or Dark Elves, who are the native race of the island of Vvardenfell where you start the game and good at both stealth and magic; Imperials, the ruling class of the game who make decent fighters and also have good communications skills; Khajit, a felinoid race who excel at stealth; Nords, a northern race of humans suited to the barbarian lifestyle; Orcs, a pig-man race with a flair for fighting; and Redguards, another human race quite suited to fighting.

Race determines starting attributes, skill bonuses, and special powers and weaknesses. The races are not perfectly balanced in terms of power, but the game focuses on open ended role playing and provides plenty of opportunities to overcome weakness, so a player need not focus to much on playing the best race and can simply play one that suits him.

Players gain levels by raising skills through use or training. Raising any combination of major and minor skills by a total of ten points will increase the character's level. Gaining a level increases maximum health and fatigue levels, but not Magicka, the game's magic point attribute. It also allows the player to increase up to three attributes. Any attributes can be increased, but a complicated system of multipliers means it will be more advantageous to raise attributes whose skills have been used frequently during the previous level.

Without having raised any of the skills governed by an attribute, you can raise that attribute by one point. If you raise even one of them by one point, you can raise it two points. After that, you total the level of governed skills raised, counting miscellaneous skills (everything that isn't a major or minor skill) as at most four points, and divide by two, with a maximum of five points. As you can see, it's complicated.

This leveling system is a minor weak point in the game. The character can gain anywhere from three to fifteen attribute points per level, so the player is forced to think about the game mechanics in order to maximize their characters progression, and this cuts back on the immersive quality of the game.

And what an immersive quality it has! The game is played in a first person style, though the camera can be switched to third person. The game is immense, with huge, detailed outdoor and indoor areas that rival any MMORPG I've played. Thousands of NPCs inhabit the island's many cities and towns. Dozens (if not hundreds, I haven't seen them all by a long shot) of dungeons and ruins filled with danger and treasure await a daring explorer.

The gameplay is completely open ended. There is a main quest that leads the hero to a world changing conclusion, but this quest needn't even be played. The player may join many different factions: the fighters' guild, thieves' guild, mages' guild, Imperial cult, native temple, Imperial legion, one of the three native Noble Houses of Hlaalu, Redoran or Telvanni, or even the assassin guild if one can find it.

Quests given by these factions can lead to fame and great rewards as the character rises through the ranks of the factions, perhaps even becoming the faction leader in the end. Some factions are in conflict with others, for instance the Noble Houses will send the characters on missions to steal business from, assassinate or steal from the other houses.

The player is free to complete most of these quests on their own timetable and in their own way. Some may use force, others stealth, and others may use magic or persuasion to complete the tasks given by the various factions. Some require careful strategy while others are simple "run and fetch" type of quests.

Fighting is done with the mouse on the PC version. Point at an enemy, get close enough and click and the character will launch a chopping attack. Holding down other keys will enable you to perform a slash or stab instead. If an attack is successful, damage done is based on the weapon, the characters strength, the enemy's armor, and the length of time the mouse button is held down.

Distance weapons such as bows, daggers and throwing stars are a bit trickier to use as they require actual aiming and compensation for both distance and a particular weapons peculiarities. Some bows seem to pull to one side or the other of the crosshairs, for instance.

Stealth and thievery are an interesting option in the game. Players may sneak to avoid detection, although the game mechanics are simple, without taking into account lighting or noise. They may also pickpocket or backstab while sneaking, although both of these require quite a high skill level to pull off regularly. Locks can be picked and traps disarmed with the appropriate tools.

In my opinion, the magick system, while incredibly detailed and fun is not very well balanced. Most good spells require a large percentage of even the best mage's magicka reserves, which do not regenerate unless the character sleeps or uses potions. This means that alchemy will be a crucial skill for any true mage. Magic spells fall into different colleges: alteration, which covers things like magically unlocking things; destruction, the college for attack spells, restoration which covers healing spells; mysticism which covers things like levitation and telekinesis; illusion which has spells such as paralyze, hide, and silence; and conjuration, the college of summoning.

While various premade spells may be purchased from different NPCs, certain NPCs also offer spellmaking services where different effects the character has learned in other spells can be modified or combined into a new spell.

Enchantments can be purchased, usually for quite a bit of money, or made with the enchantment skill, which may fail. First a character needs a soul gem. Then they cast a soul trap spell, either their own or from a scroll or enchanted item, and kills the creature it was cast on. That creature's soul is now trapped in the gem and can be used to power enchanted items. More powerful creatures yield more powerful enchantments. Effects can be selected from amongst the spells the character has learned.

Alchemy is a critical skill for a mage, as it lets them make potions which can fortify or restore magicka, as well as many other useful effects. Different plants and animal parts, as well as gems and other items have magical properties. Using various alchemical tools, two or more items with the same property can be combined to yield a potion with that property. Almost any effect that can be made using a spell can also be made using alchemy. Only alchemy (or sleep, which is hard to do in the middle of combat) can restore magicka, which is why it is crucial for a mage.

Without the expansion packs the game could easily take over 100 hours, and with both the packs that come with the Game of the Year edition, the gameplay is well over 200 hours. That would just be to finish the main quests and a few side quests. To explore the entire area and finish every single quest would easily take over 500 hours, and the replay value is immense.

Add on to that a construction set and a dedicated community of module makers and you have a game that could eat up years of your life. But don't take too long, because the next installment in the saga should be out sometime during the holiday season. Named Oblivion after the name of the outer plane inhabited by demons in the game, this next game promises to be even larger with more detailed combat and magic systems and an improved NPC AI which should make for some very open ended gameplay.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Broke 100 fans last night 2

And boy was it hot. Badump cha. No really, I now have over one hundred fans. I got around 7 new fans yesterday for some reason. Maybe my anti-Randroid Rant, Do Nothingers are even more screwed up? Anyway, I thought the system was kind of dumb when they first started it here. Then I found it kind of useful for marking people so I can be sure to see anything they write. Now that I have a bunch of fans, of course I think it is really cool. ;-)

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