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OMG GOOGLE ROMANCE <3 <3 <3!!!
Posted by
CmdrTaco
on Sat Apr 01, 2006 09:15 AM
from the can-we-get-chicks dept.
from the can-we-get-chicks dept.
Chapium writes "Google Romance (Beta) is a place where you can post all types of romantic information and, using our Soulmate Search(TM), get back search results that could, in theory, include the love of your life. Then we'll send you both on a Contextual DateTM, which we'll pay for while delivering to you relevant ads that we and our advertising partners think will help produce the dating results you're looking for.
With this addtion has Google gone too far with its data collection?"
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Slashdot users rejoice! (Score:2, Funny)
(http://noam.chigh.org/)
404 (Score:5, Funny)
(Last Journal: Saturday November 03, @09:51AM)
Could be worse (Score:5, Funny)
(http://slashdot.org/ | Last Journal: Monday November 03 2003, @03:59PM)
Making love to google... (Score:1)
rofl (Score:2)
(Last Journal: Monday February 13 2006, @07:11PM)
How cute (Score:2)
(http://www.thestevensons.org/)
Slashdot at its best. (Score:5, Funny)
(http://www.mangaschool.com/ | Last Journal: Tuesday January 03 2006, @07:51AM)
Even the April Fool's jokes have Google flamebait.
Slashdot Drinking Game (Score:5, Funny)
(http://madhatted.com/)
Story contains "OMG": 1 shot
Story contains Google, MS: get a beer
Zonk says something foolish: shot of beer
SLOW DOWN DAAMMIY!!11ToO muCh..1!!lk21;l1k
Goog's search data put to good use! (Score:5, Funny)
(http://petri.subnova.com/)
Google romance not far away from being feasible. (Score:5, Interesting)
(http://www.ckwop.me.uk/)
Imagine if Google profiled you by your Gmail account and web-searches, blogger entries, etc and was able to use this information to do a psychometric profile of you. It could then compare this with other people's profiles and suggest members of the opposite sex that it thinks you would most like!
I don't know whether this would be cool or damn scarey. What's worse is that the only thing standing in the way of this happening is programmer time. What's amazing is how effectively we've created 1984 and in how little time we've done it.
Simon
Re:Google romance not far away from being feasible (Score:5, Funny)
(Last Journal: Monday February 13 2006, @07:11PM)
Depending on you how you look at that claim, one might say we've actually been quite slow though.
"Don't be medieval" (Score:5, Funny)
(http://www.bashfr.org/)
The other button (Score:5, Funny)
from the faq (Score:2)
Here on the Google Romance team, we follow the philosophy "Don't be medieval," so we brought only the latest psychographic and search algorithms to bear on the problem of hooking up our users. First you fill out an extensive personal profile carefully designed by a team of both married and single Google engineers for the express purpose of gathering and analyzing romantic information. Then you fill out an equally obscure and elaborate profile describing various attributes of the person with whom you wish to spend the rest of your life and click 'Search Romance.' It's that simple.
4. Really? It's that simple?
Well, you know how when you do a regular Google web search, you get back uncannily accurate search results?
5. Usually. But sometimes they're a little off.
Yeah, that's why our early testers thought that Soulmate Search's "Did you really mean...?" feature came in very handy.
6. What is Contextual Dating?
It's a free date plus the added accrued value of the past decade's worth of post-Industrial Age online marketing genius, all tied into a real-time, video-based, GPS-tracked, psychographically astute and environmentally pervasive promotional system.
7. Come again?
You see ads that might make your date better.
8. Such as?
Flowers. Music. Personal advice. E-greetings. Later on, depending on how our long-term opt-out natural-language-based monitoring system thinks things are going, personalized thank you notes, romantic getaway offers, various intimate pharmaceutical come-ons, engagement and bridal wear catalogs - you know the drill.
9. What if I don't want to see contextual dating ads?
Don't use the product.
10. What do you mean when you say Google Romance is a beta product?
What do you mean when you ask us what we mean when we say Google Romance is a beta product? It is what is it, okay? It's new, it's probably still buggy, which is to say that yes, by using this product now you conceivably are setting yourself up for a disastrous outcome - but on the other hand, you might also be on the verge of thrilling to an experience that will transform your very existence and only could have come about because you took this step, right here, right now. You're online; take a chance. We may never pass this way again. Carpe diem. The world could, like, end tomorrow, you know? Gather ye rosebuds while --
11. Okay, okay, I'll try it.
Great, babe, great.
12. So, um - how do we begin?
Just sit back and relax. And say, we're curious - what's your sign?
I for one ... (Score:1)
(http://pandora.iu-bremen.de/~tstoyanov)
OMG! 3 (Score:2)
(http://johannes.truschnigg.info/)
In any case: ASL && more pix??
Translation, please? (Score:3, Funny)
(http://system.reflecti0n.net/)
For those of you having difficulty with the above emoticons, take note they can be read in either of 2 ways:
OMG GOOGLE ROMANCE less-than-three less-than-three less-than-three!!!
-- Which means on a scale of 10, this site only rates a "3"
OMG GOOGLE ROMANCE conical-penis-with-balls, conical-penis-with-balls, conical-penis-with-balls
-- Which makes no sense whasoever, must be some kind of April fool's joke.
Perfect Match (Score:5, Funny)
(http://www.guinness.com/ | Last Journal: Tuesday March 30 2004, @10:42PM)
She is my delicate flower.
Grr... (Score:1)
(http://imcontent.net/)
So gay = bad? (Score:2, Insightful)
(http://www.drinklord.com/)
Maybe you could put 'fag' next time instead? OMG, like that would be SOOOO FUNNY!!!
Re:So gay = bad? (Score:5, Insightful)
(http://www.mangaschool.com/ | Last Journal: Tuesday January 03 2006, @07:51AM)
Slashdot also has a very healthy "words evolve" faction which holds that words do not mean anything other than what the speakers of the words think they mean, so if "gay" means "bad" it's not homophobia, it's evolution.
I'm now taking signups for the "just fucking get over it, you're not that special" faction. Sign up now and get a free "There was only up to 1 cross in history that mattered, and yours ain't it." T-shirt.
maybe it's slashdotted (Score:2)
I guess I'll try again tomorrow.
gay (Score:1)
If everyone on Slashdot signed up for a dating service, the only ones who would find compatible mates would be the gay members.
No romance.. (Score:1)
That's just great - once again, the sheer volume of our users' thirst for our products has exceeded our capacity to quench it, therefore, deja vu, this service is not available at this time (at least not to you).
I wish I had registered a little sooner
Now I will never find romance !!
Romantic AdSense (Score:5, Funny)
(http://tarmas.com/)
Flowers. Music. Personal advice. E-greetings. Later on, depending on how our long-term opt-out natural-language-based monitoring system thinks things are going, personalized thank you notes, romantic getaway offers, various intimate pharmaceutical come-ons, engagement and bridal wear catalogs you know the drill.
+------------
| Ads by Goooooogle
|
| V 1 A G R A - En1arge yuor pen1$ n0w
|
| Advertise on this site
+------------
Check out the FAQ (Score:1)
(http://purl.oclc.org/NET/gavri)
It's a satire of Google's own business model. Their contextual ads and their Beta products.
And it's biting. I'm just reminded why I like Google.
6. What is Contextual Dating?
It's a free date plus the added accrued value of the past decade's worth of post-Industrial Age online marketing genius, all tied into a real-time, video-based, GPS-tracked, psychographically astute and environmentally pervasive promotional system.
7. Come again?
You see ads that might make your date better.
8. Such as?
Flowers. Music. Personal advice. E-greetings. Later on, depending on how our long-term opt-out natural-language-based monitoring system thinks things are going, personalized thank you notes, romantic getaway offers, various intimate pharmaceutical come-ons, engagement and bridal wear catalogs - you know the drill.
9. What if I don't want to see contextual dating ads?
Don't use the product.
10. What do you mean when you say Google Romance is a beta product?
What do you mean when you ask us what we mean when we say Google Romance is a beta product? It is what is it, okay? It's new, it's probably still buggy, which is to say that yes, by using this product now you conceivably are setting yourself up for a disastrous outcome - but on the other hand, you might also be on the verge of thrilling to an experience that will transform your very existence and only could have come about because you took this step, right here, right now. You're online; take a chance. We may never pass this way again. Carpe diem. The world could, like, end tomorrow, you know? Gather ye rosebuds while --
Heartbroken... (Score:1)
Just while all this pinkness and cute pictures of fluffy little animals has managed to stirred up long abandoned faint hopes of locating a perfect soulmate, your preposterous prank has shattered it all!!! All I tell you!!! Why God why?!?! *whimper*
OMG ? (Score:2, Funny)
(http://tonelli.sns.it/pub/mennucc1 | Last Journal: Friday October 26, @03:27AM)
I'm Feeling Lucky (Score:1)
OMG OMG BALLS!! (Score:2)
A 4/1 joke or ambivalence? (Score:1, Insightful)
Google builds Google Romance.
They're ambivalent about introducing it.
Product Manager has the brilliant idea to introduce it as a joke, monitor interest, and later claim, "Oh, it started as a joke, but people really wnated it, so we did it."
slashcode bug (Score:2, Informative)
(http://tusenogtjuefire.net/)
I'am feeling luck!!!!!!!!! (Score:1, Funny)
Google DOES do Romance (Score:1)
Invites! (Score:1)
This shows Google's uninterested on online dating (Score:2)
(http://www.cs.berkeley.edu/~lazzaro/)
This April Fools joke wouldn't have happened if Google had a serious interest in online dating -- it wouldn't make sense to ridicule a business concept and then enter the business.
Match.com and competitors are breathing a sigh of relief today ...
Searching doesn't work (Score:1)
(http://www.terrysoucy.ca/)
APRIL FOOLS! (Score:1)
(http://likeicare.net/)
New Google product name info incorrect (Score:1)
(http://www.wrightwing.net/)
It was decided to keep the *oogle theme going after G-male, G-Female and G-Spot were all rejected.
What the hell?!?! (Score:1)
(http://www.ece.ualberta.ca/~jnault)
Disappointed that Google romance is a prank (Score:1)
Re:WTF Stupid Slashdot (Score:1)
(http://www.vbgamer.com/)
Re:Google... still catering to the... (Score:1)
awww (Score:2)
(http://slashdot.org/)