Well, scratch out the mini-vacation in Austin. my boyfriend thought it'd be a bit to high stress with the approaching hurricane and all that entails (people hauling their crap off, hotels overbooked, whatever). So I cancelled all the reservations, and I'll just interview by phone.

Now the only thing is finding a quiet room with a land line that I can use at 2:30pm Friday afternoon, because my cell phone sucks in that it drops calls after 35 minutes or so.

Well, my boyfriend's parentals don't need the help as his mom is freaked and is leaving ASAP and doesn't want to wait for the aid of his Texan superpowers.

Soooooo....

We're going to Austin anyway for a little mini-vacation and my interview. Cool, Ausin pseudo-hurricane party. And let me tell you, last minute vacation plans are a bitch to arrange, but thanks to my swell credit card selection I have a free concierge service looking up the last details for me while I sleep.

ZZZzzzz...(cue REM cycle)

Well, I'm on a roll. I got a call this morning regarding a position I applied for regarding Street & Bridge design in Austin. They want to interview me this Friday, and as it turns out I just might be there helping my boyfriend's family move out of hurricane Rita's way. (Also George Carlin is playing Austin that Saturday, so win-win)

Awesome.

Well, I got a call from a recruiter today. I had listed my resume on Monster and listed Louisiana and Mississippi(and Austin) as where I wanted to relocate. They sent me an e-mail earlier last week inquiring about my interest in a FEMA related position due to my chosen locations.

So the Florida contact person chatted with me for 15 minutes today, and it seems highly likely that I'll be in Mississippi by the end of October, if not sooner. They are starting off the engineering damage assesment over there, as opposed to New Orleans, because there is still hazardous clean up that needs to take place before they'll allow engineers into that area.

The contract is for 3 months minimum, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to get a leave of absence from my current job. But that doesn't worry me, because the company already expressed their interest in hiring me after the FEMA stuff is done. And I was allready planning on leaving here anyway.

But the job seems pretty interesting, and they even include a long weekend trip home every month. And my Crohn's is mostly in remission, and I see my GI doc on Monday and have a CT-scan scheduled before then so we can see that things are cleared up and nothing nasty has grown back.

Hmmm, is there a corelation here...earlier in the week there is a blackout because someone at the department of water and power cut their own power line...today out secretary hands out copies of how to avoid trenching accidents.

Ya I wish I worked for DWP, they make more $$$, have better benefits and have a 16% raise being negotiated.

Well, I just ordered my boyfriend's Christmas present. It takes 10-12 weeks to be made, so I think it will get here on time.

I don't think that he would suspect me getting him it at all. But he was drooling over them when we were in Australia a year ago, and they didn't have his size in stock or he would have ordered them right then.

Well, what did I get him...I shiny new pair of boots.

Update:

I just got a call from the online boot company confirming the order. They said that they get some bogus orders and call to confirm to make sure it's not a stolen card. So, yippee, the boots are in process and they also confirmed my request that no catalogs or other mail be sent out so that I can keep the gift a surprise.

I get a misterious phonecall from my boyfriend, telling me to go into the room where we keep the Green Books. OK, this was kinda weird. It takes me a second for it to sink in, then I walk to the supply room. And what do you know, he is there helping a coworker get some books for their office.

There was only enough time for some witty banter while the other coworkers were around. But we sneaked a quick kiss as he headed down the hallways.

But still... It made my afternoon.

I'm so excited. I just came across a really cool relationship skills workshop that's both nearby in time and space :) As it's only a 2 hour drive and happening this weekend. It seems right along the lines of the stuff I've been reading, adn looking into. The workshop that I really wanted to take (PAIRS) is unfortunatly not in the area, but this is such a close match that I got jazzed from reading just one of their articles because it paralells what I'm looking for.

One main reason why I'm excited is about how happy I've been this week after our Tuesday night couples counseling session, where we finally came to an agreement with regards to one of the big trust issues that we've been having. It was a very tearful evening before and during the session, so much that I had a headache afterwards from all that sinus overload. But the weight off of my shoulders of not having to worry about that issue anymore, that I can just trust my boyfriend to respect the boundries that we set down. I've seen a visible shift in my mood since. So much more relaxed.

And I'm also excited in the positive changes my boyfriend has made so far. He's been more tactile, in the little things. Like when I'm watching TV and he's on the floor putting together a puzzle, and he'll reach over and rub my ankle. And that means so much to me, as I'm such a cuddle monkey. It's those little things like him putting his hand on mine while we're reading on the bus, or putting his arm on my sholder as we're driving. Oooo, and last weekend he surprised me with the coolest breakfast. He walked to the grocery store, adn when he go tback had me muck about in the back room while he got things ready. Then when I came out I saw a blanket out on the floor with two plates on it fo ra indoor picnic. He made crepes with numerous types of berries garnishing the top, it looked so professional. And there were mimosas too, yum. That was fun.

And another cool thing that he did was totally unexpected, was that I had put my soup in the microwave to reheat, and gone into the back and wasted some time checking e-mail and whatnot, and when I came back into the living room he had taken my soup out and had it all set up on the table for me, complete with salt and pepper shakers too. I was floored by that one, and I'm a little shy to say, but it actually meant more than the whole breakfast that morning. Because I had kinda known that he was going to do something special because he was dissapointed that he couldn't take me out to a bed & breakfast over the lkong weekend.

Well, back to the workshop...I'm just excited. An added reason being that my boyfriend isn't looking forward to the possability of long term counseling. (for him with this, long term would be anything that would possible encroach into next year) And I see going to this workshop would be a catalyst for change and lead to the goal of not needing to see the tea kettle any more. (tea kettle being what my boyfriend calls our therapist because he looks a bit like the character from the animated Beauty and the Beast)

Good change is on the horizon and it brings a smile to my face.

Update:
Ok, he agreed to it...hesitantly. I sure hope that this is a good experience. We'll see...

Ok so here's the story....

Tuesday morning my boyfriend and I got to the bus stop with time to spare and the driver never showed up. The next lady busdriver that drove the route said that she passed him allready driving down rosecrans and he probably took a shortcut because he was running late, and that we should submit a complaint to the MTA about it. So I filled out the online form regarding the incident.

Wednesday, the bus driver was there along with a supervisor in a van at the stop to make sure he showed. He didn't take the road along main street to get to the bus stop but had to do this loop along Mesa St to pull up at the bus stop on Grand. He stopped, got out to talk to his supervisor, and just waved us into the bus without asking to see out passes. The guy seemed nice enough that morning.

Thursday, we got to the bus stop on time and saw the bus waiting along Mesa St. When we got to the bus stop on Grand the bus driver then started up the bus, drove to the corner, and instead of turning right along Grand to get to the bus stop he just pulled up to the stop sign, opened the doors and honked at us. So we walked to the end of the block to get on the bus, we got on the bus and I showed him my bus pass, but my boyfriend's was in his wallet. And the bus driver started driving down Grand (without making the normal loop, and skipping a few bus stops) Then he complains that we only showed him one pass, mumbling that you don't ride the bus for free so my boyfriend had to dig out his and show the driver the pass while the bus was in motion.

At that point I was pissed off. You don't stop at the bus stop, honk at us, we're nice enough to walk over to your lazy ass, and then you proceed to be rude to my boyfriend?!?!! Fuck that, you motherfucker. So I'm registering yet another complaint, this time about him skipping part of the route and not stopping at the bus stop. Hopefully the next driver our route gets will not think that they're doing us a favor by just showing up.

6-mp, mercaptopurine, whatever you want ot call it, it sucks.

My doctor just upped my dose, from it's low level to med-low dose. And I've noticed the side effects increasing. Mainly the fatigue. I noticed it alot this last weekend. I'd sleep for 10-11 hours wake up adn then a couple of hours later feel my feet drag, and this overwhelming sleepiness. The thought crossed my mind more than once to just crawl into the car and take a nap because browzing around REI or the bookstore was tiresome.

And now I think I've come up with something new. Maybe the whole change of taste thing. Because lately, I just haven't been wanting to eat meat. It just hasn't been apealing. It's fine with things like chicken soup, where it's not the main ingredient. But something like carne asada or steak...I'll pass for now.

Well, a couple of job opportunities have come up in New Orleans. My boyfriend and I got some e-mails that have us thinking. As they desperately need civil engineers to help out in red tagging structures and helping out with other things...they are also willing to pay well for the work. 3 months living in army barracks, with food provided, working long days and getting paid quite well for the effort.

So we're sending in our resume's and double checking on the availability of getting a 3 month leave of absence. Because a chance like this doesn't come along very often. Where you get such in depth disaster training, and pay off all your debts all at once. (And get to say that you helped rebuild New Orleans)

At the begining of the year:
182 hours of 100% sick time
120 hours of 75% sick time

Now:
0 hours of 100%
117 hours of 75%

Yep, I've used up all of my sick time during this latest Crohn's flare and now am taking a hit in the pocketbook whenever I have to take time out to go to the doctors. I certainly hope that this abscess is dried up and not returning because I don't get anymore time untill the new year. Luckily I've got the 75% and adequate health care that doesn't charge me much for visits. I should probably check and see how much $$ I've put out for medical so that I can deduct if on my taxes, but I'm not sure that I've gone over the limit (I think it's somewhere around $8000 before you can start getting taxes back)

Well there's a couple of tools for couples out there with some ideas ...

Site 59 has some great last minute vacation ideas for weekend getaways. There are also site similar to this such as Last Minute Travel.

Then there's allways a weekend cruise where your hotel travels with you, the meals are included and the booze you can smuggle aboard in water bottles.

Not enough benjamins for a diddy like life style, well there are other options...

Or even if you just don't know what to do and would like some new ideas to try out. Then there are a bunch of sites out there loaded with lists from cheap romantic outings to making your own home a bed and breakfast for the weekend.

Also you can check your local paper like the LA Weekly for stuff to do in and around town. Like attend that free concert in the park or stroll around local art fair.

Or you can allways just throw a few essentials in the car, grab a map and choose north/south/east or west and just drive and see where you end up.

Well I just got back for a photo shoot for a book written by one of my favorite self help authors, Rhonda Britten. The books about body image, and called Do I Look Fat in This? : Get Over Your Body and On With Your Life.

It was apretty cool, seeing all the other girls that decided to attend the shoot. The thing was an e-mail was sent out a couple of days ago asking for voulenteers in the LA area to get their pictures taken. THe thing was that all the pictures were to be of you in black bike shorts and a black sports bra. And then they were going to video tape interviws with you as well.

I decided to go for it mainly becuse it made me very nervous thingking of going in front of a camera when I'm overweight with all this extra weight I've regained in the last year since my Crohn's relapsed. Yep I'm not looking forward to having my current low point documented. (Yep, I'm not happy I am up to 240 right now as I was able to get down to 185 from my high of 265) But I did it becasue I was scared. I did it because I like to do things that make me uncomfortable because I wanted to expand my comfort circle.

IT was so helpful going there and seeing all the other girls who had their own body imaage issues. Like Rhonda's personal assistant who was model gorgeous, but thought she was disgusting adn didn't want to have her picture taken. Also, the cute asian girl who was a dancer and an actress and was in tears because she didn't want to be so vulnerable. But they both got the courage up to get in the black and take their pictures. It makes me feel so much more comfortable knowing things I feel are common throughout. Everyone has their issues. And just giving up all that obscession with body issues frees one up to be so much more.

They also talked about contacting all the voulenteers for a book release party when it comes out. That will be pretty cool.

Well I went to the therapist last night. She is a small grandma type lady in a nondescript rented room in a buisness building. I was allready pretty emotionally worked up from the day thinking of what to talk about. So I went through alot of tissues talking to her.

She seemed nice and I felt comfortable talking with her, and would give her a 6.5 on a 10 scale. That she would be adequate (and inexpensive), but not exceptional. So I scheduled an appointment with her for this Thursday ofr both of us to go see her. And I also contacted another therapist who specializes in both couples counseling and chronic illness. So hopefully she will get back to me soon. But to help things out in the interim there's lady#1.

And I really want things to get better because my boyfriend seems like he's hit critical mass of talking about things, adn he gets uptight and frustrated when I try to discuss relationship issues with him.

Like the other night when I was talking to him about how I wanted to trust him and believe in him. That I didn't want to write him off like I have my mom. Because she just doesn't keep her promises. He didn't really sleep well that night, but I didn't find out untill two days after that that it was because he was upset at the possibility of me resenting him. That he was afraid of it and absolutly didnot want the relationship to get to that place. I agreed with him, I don't either, which is why I'm putting all this effort into solving our communication and other issues now before we go further and move to a new city and buy a house.

I just wish that I knew a way to convey my feelings and needs to him without raising his hackles. I really hope that I find that key before this all explodes in my face. Because it's getting messy. And I really care about my boyfriend and want to work things out. But I also realise that it won't work unless he puts some effort into this. And I wish that he'd just try and understand my point of view without the 'but'. Such as..."I'm sorry sweetie that my friend was an insensitive ass and hurt your feelings, but you know why he's insensitive so you shouldn't let it get to you like that"...Just the first half is all I want, the addition of the second part diminishes the validity of the emotions that I was feeling.