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Intel Your Rights Online

Intel Puts The Squeeze On ... A Yoga Foundation? 389

Posted by timothy from the making-chips-instead-of-license-plates dept.
geogeek6_7 writes: "Intel Inc., everyone's favorite chipmaker, has apparently decided that they own the rights to the word 'Inside.' In proceedings bordering on the line of frivolity, the Yoga Inside Foundation has been tagged with trademark infringment in papers submitted to the PTO by Intel. The article states that Intel will most likely use the Trademark Dilution Act of 1995 in court." Don't worry, Intel doesn't want every instance of the word "Inside" -- only the ones that come right after another word. (Look at the meaning of "Inside" that the YIF is referring to, and the story gets even more absurd.)
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Intel Puts The Squeeze On ... A Yoga Foundation? More

Intel Puts The Squeeze On ... A Yoga Foundation?

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  • trademarks (Score:2, Insightful)

    by 56ker ( 566853 )
    I thought trademarks (at least in the U.K.) were only applicable to a particular market - ie you could call your company Windows if it cleaned windows - but if it made computer operating systems it would be a trademark infringement with Microsoft.

    • Re:trademarks (Score:2, Informative)

      by jnana ( 519059 )
      Not according to the Trademark Dilution Act (in the U.S.). The article states that "the Trademark Dilution Act adopted by Congress in 1995 is specifically intended to protect the famous brands of major U.S. corporations. The law seeks to safeguard well-established brands from upstarts even in unrelated industries."

  • TV Small Court of Sanity (Score:5, Insightful)

    by ghostlibrary ( 450718 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:29AM (#3251738) Homepage Journal
    I think there should be a new reality TV Show, "Small Court of Sanity". Unlike current People's Court/Judge Judy TV shows, where individuals do small claims, this would be the first case where any lawsuit by a multimillion dollar company vs a much smaller entity would be aired.

    Yep, the big companies would _have_ to use this court before the case was allowed to go (via appeal) to the usual federal courts. No lawyers, just like small court-- just the 2 sides presenting their case to a telegenic judge. Shown publically, to expose how ludicrious this is.

    Court costs would, of course, be covered by advertising. The rest would go to the US gov't (thus probably wiping out the national debt in just 3 seasons...)

    And hey, once the corps realized that the negative PR cost of being displayed as total loons on daytime TV cost more than nuking some pitiful NPO or individual, maybe fewer would be filed.

    At least moving these things away from the horrible, horrible process that is our modern judiciary would give some recourse to individuals and small entities. You know it's bad when I'm recommending jerry springer-like exposure over the court system.

  • Keeping up Appearances. (Score:4, Insightful)

    by tcd004 ( 134130 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:29AM (#3251740) Homepage
    "Intel spokesman Chuck Mulloy said the company knows it could come off looking to some like a bully."

    This is the understatement of the year.

    The yoga people are offering the Intel Exec's free lessons so that they can learn to be a little more "flexible." If I were in Intel PR, I'd jump on that opportunity right away, and issue a press release the next morning.

    Witness the rebirth of ENRON! [lostbrain.com]

    tcd004
    • Hmm. Who knows, if the BigCo[tm] C?O's took yoga from these people, maybe the world would be a bigger practice. Western "Spanish Inquisition" tactics giving way to eastern philosophy.. a new synergy could form among the tech industry.. Sun & Intel get together to form the most powerful and cheap chips to empower everyone on the planet for their own good.. Sun, RedHat, and Microsoft get together to make a unified OS with the powers of each and the weaknesses of none that anyone on the planet could use simply, but would handle the most difficult task with sveltely..

      Err.. hold on... this isn't a marlboro.

    • Re:Keeping up Appearances. (Score:5, Funny)

      by Negadecimal ( 78403 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @02:24AM (#3252201)
      The yoga people are offering the Intel Exec's free lessons so that they can learn to be a little more "flexible."

      Intel should take a lesson from Southwest Airlines. A few years back, some small North Carolina company called them up claiming to have prior rights to "Just Plane Smart". And instead of threatening legal action, they suggested an arm-wrestling match - i.e. winner takes the trademark.

      Southwest actually sent a wrestler (who lost), and won a ton of PR points for it.
  • Here is the site in question [yogainside.org], or follow this link [yogainside.org] if you want to skip the flash intro.

  • New warning sign at Intel's headquarters... (Score:5, Funny)

    by tshak ( 173364 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:30AM (#3251746) Homepage
    WARNING: Lawyers Inside.

  • Intel had better watch out... (Score:3, Funny)

    by roseanne ( 541833 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:31AM (#3251747)
    What with going after a *yoga* school, all that bad karma could hammer them down.

    :-)

  • He said the "instant recognition and appeal" of the "blank inside" format stems from "Intel's enormous investment of over a decade of time and money."

    Somebody PLEASE find a prior use example of "(fill in the blank) inside", and kill this one dead! It needs to be stomped on!

    Shakespeare had the right idea, though I would also add corporations to the list of things that need killing.
  • Is it just me or do trademarks have nothing to do with specific trades anymore. I could understand Intel being pissed about another chip maker using "foo inside" to promote their products. Hey it's just like patents, too broad and seriously abused.
  • In other words, I guess Intel is claiming to have copyrighted the production
    INTELCOPYRIGHT ::= <proper_noun> INSIDE

    I think the international copyright laws should be updated to allow regular expressions, and attribute grammars.

  • After they hit up this ska band [tripod.com], of course.

    W

  • The Intel Lawyer Trademark (Score:5, Funny)

    by Black Art ( 3335 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:34AM (#3251760)
    I guess the lawyers for Intel have a trademark on "Evil Inside".

    I guess their lawyers figure people will confused between yoga and a company with their head up their ass.

  • links (Score:2, Informative)

    by CmdrTaco (editor) ( 564483 )
    Yoga inside- http://www.yogainside.org/ [yogainside.org]
    Swaine- http://www.swaine.com/tuesday.html [swaine.com] Diversions- http://diversions.kaptiv-8.com/ [kaptiv-8.com]

    Send email [mailto] to complain.

  • ...we can post stories like this so only the U.S. citizens can see them? This is humiliating.
  • "Litigious Assholes Inside"

    ~Philly
  • ...bending your legs up and over your head is now a violation of the DMCA.

  • Inside Windows (Score:2, Funny)

    by bstadil ( 7110 )
    Select this as the new name for you "Greenhouse DYI kit" and you will get "two for One" Lawsuits.

  • Intel is just protecting consumer rights (Score:5, Funny)

    by 1001 0000 ( 464062 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:52AM (#3251816)
    I called intel tech support and they said the reason my new CPU won't boot is because its actually a 2 week yoga program. I felt a little embarrassed, but the techie said it's a common complaint and Intel is working on it.

  • They're all spoiled, now. (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Corvaith ( 538529 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:54AM (#3251818) Homepage
    Once upon a time, people worried about trademarks. They worried about trademarks because 'aspirin' had become a generic, and they worried that this might happen to them. They wanted to protect what was theirs. Companies competed with each other, and it was good.

    Capitalism is good, in its pure and properly practiced form--unfortunately, so is any other form of economy. The bigger companies contributed to political campaigns, and so they began to get judges to rule in their favor even when, perhaps, it wasn't something they really had a right to. They paid for privacy when someone should have looked over their shoulders.

    And then it gradually came to the point where large businesses *expected* this privilege. I can't blame Intel because they're behaving in a way which corporate America not only accepts but encourages. They're no longer motivated by a search for prosperity but by mere greed--they are the gluttons who want more food even when they can't eat anymore.

    These lawsuits are the symptoms, not the disease. People need to become aware of the business practices of the companies they patronize, and modify their spending habits appropriately. They need to let their representatives know that the interests of business aren't *their* interests.

    Once the people take the power *back* from the corporations, maybe the world will regain some of its sanity again. Remember, in America, even if you can't vote, you are an all-important Consumer--pay attention to the choices you make.
    • ""
      These lawsuits are the symptoms, not the disease. People need to become aware of the business practices of the companies they patronize, and modify their spending habits appropriately. They need to let their representatives know that the interests of business aren't *their* interests.
      ""

      Good idea. I don't want to be critical, but it's no where near far enough. Companies use their power to maintain the status quo. They do it through advertising, buying politicians, etc. Its all legal and accepted.

      You fight a long and loosing battle simply trying to "change spending habits" and "notify your politician." In the face of the whole cultural context driving people to act in ways that maintain the dichotomy between people and companies -- suggestions like that will have small effect, even if implemented.

      read my sig

    • In other words. (Score:3, Insightful)

      by Malcontent ( 40834 )
      How you shop is just as important as how you vote if not more so.

      Shopping is something you do every day voting is once a year (if you show up for local elections).

      Shopping effects corporations which are more powerful then the govt and for all practical purposes own the govt. How you spend your dollars has a much bigger impact on the composition of your community and country then how you vote.

      Unfortunately the number of people who are mindful of their spending is smaller then the number of people who vote.

      What a pathetic country we live in.
    • Pure capitalism doesn't need trademark laws. Nor patents. Pure competitive advantage based companies can survive and prosper without such ancient constructs!

      It's not the corporations that grant these monopolistic situations - its the STATE! Corps just make best use of available laws because if they don't someone else will and they'll lose competitive advantage.

      Take away the laws and the corps can't use 'em. Leave them and they HAVE TO or they cease to exist - just to be replaced by ones that DO because we all want to buy stuff.

      Can't have an economy without corps! Can't have your shiny 4 disc LOTR DVD without corps!
      • Pure capitalism doesn't need trademark laws. Nor patents. Pure competitive advantage based companies can survive and prosper without such ancient constructs!

        Not really.

        1. You invent product with name people will recall.

        2. I invent similar product with same name.

        3. What happens now?

        Tom
  • From the article:
    Intel isn't like a tree swaying in the wind?

    "I haven't seen much flexibility so far," Stephens replied.

    I dunno. It seems to me that Intel is pretty contorted here. They've certainly done a lot of twisting. Maybe even performed with their corporate body, what might be termed, in a very subtle and euphemistic sense, a "yogic posture".

    Sig: What Happened To The Censorware Project (censorware.org) [sethf.com]

  • Rush Out 'n' Register (Score:5, Funny)

    by nick_davison ( 217681 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @12:57AM (#3251827)
    It kind of makes want to rush out and register "Just To Make Our Lawyers Fuzzy Inside". Just picture the court room.

    "Yes, your honor, we are suing Just To Make Our Lawyers Fuzzy Inside"

    Finally, some honesty in the legal system. :)

  • NIN (Score:4, Funny)

    by Waffle Iron ( 339739 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @01:00AM (#3251837)
    In other news, the rock band Nine Inch Nails was forced to recall copies of it's blockbuster album "The Downward Spiral" from store shelves. This in response to intense government pressure calling for censorship of the lyrics to the hit song "Closer".

    They will be shortly re-issuing the CD with these sanitized lyrics that are more compatible with current American sensitivities:

    I want to FUCK you like an animal

    I want to feel you from the in***e

    When asked for comment, band leader Trent Reznor said: "Yeah, I'm upset about this. But I feel better knowing that I've personally scored more chicks than all of the dorks working at Intel combined."

  • Intel stopped Silicon Graphics making T-shirts with a logo which said "Attitude Inside". It did have a little swirl like the Intel logo though so it was sailing closer to the wind than the yoga thing.
  • If Intel actually wins this, which I doubt, then I better watch what I say.

    If I say, "Oh, hey! How are you doing Joe? Please go inside..."

    Then I can safely assume that Intel's lawyers will be knocking at my door telling me to watch what I say and threaten me with law suits.

    I would have to say something like, "Oh, hey! How are you doing Joe? Inside is my house, please go..."

    That sounds realy stupid. And that goes the same for this case, it is stupid too.

  • Yoga...The path of peace (Score:5, Informative)

    by javaman235 ( 461502 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @01:09AM (#3251883)
    The word Yoga, for those who don't know actually means "union", and refers to the state of oneness with God and all humanity sought by the practitioners. It has many different flavors, only one of which is "Hatha Yoga", or "health union", which seeks to bring health to the body, so higher thoughts can be focused on before going to INNER yoga, which includes schools or raja, kriya, bhakti, and karma yoga, many of which some scholars believe have been passed on for as many as 4,000 years orally, and are refered to in the hindu vedas.

    These people have been refering to yoga as an inner thing for thousands of years. If that's not prior use please shoot me.

  • quote (Score:3, Funny)

    by Phroggy ( 441 ) <slashdot3@@@phroggy...com> on Saturday March 30, 2002 @01:11AM (#3251891) Homepage
    Excerpt from new OSHA regulation on computer systems: "....if said motherboard is equipped with an Intel central processing unit, an appropriate warning label bearing the words 'Intel Inside' shall be permanently affixed to the case in a prominent location."

    - Bruce Murphy
  • Didn't the people who owned the "got Milk?" trademark try similar litigation and got shot down by the courts?

    I have tried finding references pro or con on this, but all the anti-milk PETA sites are making searching difficult.
  • Gee, for a company that is trying so hard to protect their trademark, it's quite amazing this site [bigbrotherinside.com] has been able to stick around for the last two years. This site rips off Intel(TM)'s logo and everything.

    If you ask me, this sounds like a lawyer looking for a way to finance a new BMW and a Caribbean vacation.

  • Intel, fuck you (Score:4, Interesting)

    by dh003i ( 203189 ) <dh003i@gmail. c o m> on Saturday March 30, 2002 @01:28AM (#3251965) Homepage Journal
    This is a bunch of bullshit. Intel, please don't blame others for your assinite attempts to own the English language. Its not the laws fault that you're assholes. Not only that, but who FORCED you to trademark a COMMON word like Inside? There are many common usages of the word inside which have another describing word preceeding it.

    "We can't let a precedent be set," he explained. " 'Yoga Inside' might not sound bad, but what happens when someone comes along with 'Apple Inside'?"

    If its in reference to an Apple being in an apple orchard, that's fucking fine.

    Even if its Apple computer, who said you have the right to trademark common words? If Apple came up with an add that said something like:

    "Apple Inside"

    there's nothing wrong with that either. After all, that's what it is: Its an Apple. Since its also an Apple on the outside, they might say something like:

    Apple Outside. Apple Inside.

    This is just plain ludicrous. Other people shouldn't be prevented from using the ENGLISH LANGUAGE to their benefit because you assholes can't be original and trademark things that aren't already words.

    By the way, you fucking assholes, there's something called the First Amendment. It has constitutional basis, so it trumps any "trademark" laws.

    This is no different than IBM trying to trademark the "e" symbol with a circle around it. Come on. That's fucking bullshit.

    Suggesting to Intel, IBM, and other lamers who are trying to own the English Language by trademarks: if your going to make a trademark, make up a word/symbol for it. Suggestion to Intel for a REAL trademark:

    "Intelliside"

    Oh wait, because of assholes like you Intel fucks, MS might sue you for trademark violations of its "IntelliPoint" mouse.

    Other assholes include Nike, both for trademarking the word "Nike" and for trademarking the Nike symbol. Nike is the greek god of victory, closely associated with Athena/Minerva. And her symbol was the same symbol that the Nike shoe uses. Sounds like fucking prior art to me. Not to mention, it should be public domain.

    • Why blame a corp? (Score:4, Insightful)

      by jeti ( 105266 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @06:37AM (#3252982)
      The job of a corporation is to make money. To
      increase shareholder value. You can hardly blame
      them for trying to do that. Even if you don't
      like the means.

      It is the job of governments to create and enforce
      rules that corps have to comply to. It is the job
      of a government to care for the goods of its
      citizens.

      If the jurisdiction fails, put the blame where it
      belongs.

      • Re:Why blame a corp? (Score:4, Insightful)

        by sjames ( 1099 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @11:03AM (#3253569) Homepage Journal

        The job of a corporation is to make money. To increase shareholder value. You can hardly blame them for trying to do that. Even if you don't like the means.

        The duty of any human being is to behave in an ethical manner. The duty of any citizen is to promote the good of his/her society.

        Those duties superceed any duty as an employee or shareholder of a corperation. Since a corperation is made up solely of employees and shareholders, behaving in an ethical manner and promoting the good of society are the top two duties. Therefore, increasing shareholder value must be accomplished through ethical behaviour in a way that promotes the good of society.

        If a corperation behaves in an ethical manner, it can, with care, meet it's second obligation by meeting it's third. This is true because producing a useful product or service while enhancing the prosperity of it's constituants is good for society. The key is to make sure that it's means to that end do not cause more harm than good.

        Government exists solely to require and facilitate the first two duties. All that it does must be a means to those ends. It is meant to be both a forum where citizens may discuss what constitutes ethical behavoiur and the good of society, and as an organizer to promote that good. Legislation is meant to be an enumeration of the findings of that forum. Criminal court and law enforcement share the sad but necessary function of stopping and correcting people who fail in their duties in a manner consistant with that forum's findings. Courts also act as a lesser forum with a narrower focus where the enumeration (law) is clarified and applied to individual circumstance.

        The failure of government to perform it's function does not relieve ANYONE (member of a corperation or not) of their duties. If the law fails to enumerate a necessary behaviour (or restraint) and the court must err on the side of leniancy (in the hope of minimising harm), that does not in itself make an action acceptable.

        Closer to the topic at hand, In this matter, To date, Intel is behaving better than many other corperations might in this matter. It could do much better. If it would think flexibly and use the money a legal battle would cost (or even a fraction of it) to sponsor Yoga Inside instead, it would do much more good for society as well as for itself and avoid the potential damage to the strength of it's trademark that a finding for the defendant might cause.

    • What do you think about three stripes of Adidas? Or about the fact that Peugeot owns every single x0y number? Yes, every 3-digit number with 0 in the middle is their property. Every one of these numbers: 101, 102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 201, 202, 203, 204, 205, 206, 207, 208, 209, 301, 302, 303, 304, 305, 306, 307, 308, 309, 401, 402, 403, 404, 405, 406, 407, 408, 409, 501, 502, 503, 504, 505, 506, 507, 508, 509, 601, 602, 603, 604, 605, 606, 607, 608, 609, 701, 702, 703, 704, 705, 706, 707, 708, 709, 801, 802, 803, 804, 805, 806, 807, 808, 809, 901, 902, 903, 904, 905, 906, 907, 908 and 909 is owned by Peugeot. No, not just Peugeot x0y, Any-brand x0y! Do you know that Porsche 911 was first named Porsche 901 but had to be renamed, because Peugeot "owns" numbers with zero in the middle? Search Google for porsche 901 911 peugeot [google.com] to see what I mean. Otherwise everyone would surely confuse this beauty [pca.org] with Peugeot (they wish!). I don't even know if there ever was any Peugeot 901! But who cares? It's their "intellectual property" and it's wrong to steal property, right?
      • Or about the fact that Peugeot owns every single x0y number? Yes, every 3-digit number with 0 in the middle is their property.

        You may want to tell that to Ferrari [supercars.net] or BMW [supercars.net] or Porsche [supercars.net], for that matter.

      • Ferrari 308 GTB (Score:4, Insightful)

        by kfg ( 145172 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @10:33AM (#3253466)
        I'm sorry, but you're simply wrong. Peugot has often *claimed* to won those numbers, but they certainly don't. In the case of Porsche they decided they couldn't afford to fight Peugot in court and "voluntarily" acquiesed.

        What's more you are under the impression that trademark is intellectual property. It isn't. It is association in the public's mind, and if the public loses that association you lose the right to the exclusive right to use the mark, as in Band-Aid and Kleenex.

        As such, in a very real and legal way, a trademark is the "intellectual property" of the public!

        A trademark is an item that can be uniquely identified with a business. A company is granted the "temporary" right to the exclusive use of the mark only so long as it is, and remains, a unique indentifier.

        As it happens a car model number with zero in the middle does *not* uniquely identify a Peugot, and "Yoga Inside" does NOT conjur up images of computer chips.

        Thus neither is a valid trademark.

        KFG

        • Re:Ferrari 308 GTB (Score:3, Insightful)

          by Tackhead ( 54550 )
          > Peugot has often *claimed* to won those numbers, but they certainly don't. In the case of Porsche they decided they couldn't afford to fight Peugot in court and "voluntarily" acquiesed.

          This must be some strange definition of the word "voluntary" of which I was previously unaware.

          Do you perchance work for the IRS, which claims (with a straight face, no less) that the U.S. tax system "is based on individual self-assessment and voluntary compliance"?

          Would you defend a rapist in court with "Your Honor, in the case of the young woman in question, she decided she didn't have the physical capability to fight my client in the back alley, and voluntarily decided to have sex before going to the nearest hospital emergency room?"

    • Re:Intel, fuck you (Score:3, Insightful)

      by swillden ( 191260 )

      This is no different than IBM trying to trademark the "e" symbol with a circle around it. Come on. That's fucking bullshit.

      Good post up to here. Actually it's completely different. The circled 'e' was a new symbol, a character that hadn't been used before. The obvious relationship with the @ symbol and the use of the letter 'e' was so clever that in retrospect it seems obvious. But it wasn't obvious, and it was a completely new symbol (AFAIK; if others had used it before, I retract this entire argument).

      Inventing a clever logo and trademarking it seems like a *perfectly* legitimate thing to do and completely different from trying to trademark common words like "Inside" or "Windows".

      • Re:Intel, fuck you (Score:3, Interesting)

        by dh003i ( 203189 )
        Please, so if I make a symbol with an i and a circle around it for information, i should own that? Come on. Putting a circle around a letter or symbol is not clever. I can put a circle around any letter in the keyboard...doesn't mean I should be able to trademark it.
  • I'd like to take this opportunity to inform all of you that you'll soon be getting the paperwork in the mail from my lawyers (that's right, I have a team of them) for trademark infringement. I own a company called "The Inc." and over time I've noticed almost all of you using my trademarked company name in various posts/stories/journals etc. Being the reasonable, understanding person that I am, I shall settle for a small fine of say $1000 per infringement? After all, I really dislike court battles, so just pay me every time you want to use the word, 'the' and there won't be any trouble. :)

    This satirical comment brought to you by Intel: Assholes Inside

  • That's it, I switch to AMD. Intel Go @#$ yourself inside.

    PPA, the girl next door.

  • Karma time (Score:3, Funny)

    by quantaman ( 517394 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @01:40AM (#3252022)
    provider of yoga lessons, especially one that's so clearly fighting the good fight, karmawise.

    Does anyone know how I can contact them?
    I want some more Karma!!!
  • I guess they don't care about the bad publicity that this will generate, not to mention how absurd this really is. This is not very INTEL-ligent.
  • I'm am going to put a gigantic sign on the front of my house that says

    "I'm inside"

    better yet, someone should sell bumper stickers that say, "people inside"

  • And the top then star inside phrases associated with Intel:

    10. Assholes Inside.
    09. Lawyers Inside.
    08. Fuck-holes Inside.
    07. Dorks Inside.
    06. Pinheads Inside.
    05. Greedy-fucking-bastards Inside.
    04. Arrogant-pricks Inside.
    03. Information-nazi's Inside.
    02. Dumb-fucks Inside.

    and the number one Star Inside phrase is...

    01. Big-Brother Inside.
  • With Intel support the opposition to the DMCA, I thought that I should atleast play devil's advocate a bit. I feel I/we owe them that much.

    When I first heard this, I thought to myself, "Man, copyright law sucks, but this sorta makes sense. I mean, Yoga Inside does seem to be capitalizing off of Intel Inside." It's not uncommon either for companies in different fields to try and capitalize off of a well-no slogan either.

    Then I saw that they provided Yoga lessons to prisoners, and that Inside refers to being inside a prison. I have to believe that once the higher ups hear about this, they'll drop the lawsuit quick. It's unreasonable. When lawyers don't have enough real work to do, they tend to try and find a way to justify the horrific amounts of money they charge. I'm gonna have to give Intel the benefit of the doubt on this one that they'll do the right thing.
  • You get what you pay for...

    Suggested new trademark for Intel: Lawyers Inside

  • In related news, Intel press spin-meisters said they were forced to sue the CIA for violating Intel's trademark on the word "Intel".

    Intel spinmeister's said to the press, "Trademark law forced us to sue them. It forces us to aggressively defend our trademarks, even in non-related industries."

    The CIA's response, "The CIA has decided that since general words such as "intel" can be trademarked, we're suing Intel for violating OUR intellectual property. The CIA used the word Intel long before Intel. Thus, we should be the one's suing some poor Yoga schmuck, not Intel."
  • The article says something about the intel execs claiming that their hands are tied, the laws are writen in such a way that forces them to be very asshole'ish about trademark issues. So then why hasn't Apple compuer shutdown the Apple orchard bussiness? j/k =)

    At some point you would think that people would patent all the ideas, and all the words, and all things would be owned by somebody. To the point that laws would have to under go a dramatic reversal to allow a person to even speak in public without uttering copy protected speak.

    And speaking of dilution. I think Dilution would be more like saying "Sparc within", or "Alpha in-the-box", and even "PowerPC inward". Dilution in this form is true dilution since it would make the issue ambigous of how you define "inside", or its like words.

  • Can we trademark regular expressions? (Score:3, Funny)

    by NFW ( 560362 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @02:28AM (#3252217) Homepage
    I used to work for a company called Connectsoft, whose flagship product was Email Connection. We had a couple others, like Font Connection, Clip-Art Connection, we had an idea called Grocery Connection and demo of (I kid you not) Pizza Connection. One of my fellow employees once lamented that we couldn't trademark a regular expression. Like maybe ".+\ Connection"

    So now I have to wonder. According to Intel, we could have.

    Is it to late to trademark "Virtual\ .+" ?

  • 80,000 variations (Score:3, Funny)

    by Bongo ( 13261 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @02:32AM (#3252226)

    There are 80 basic Yoga postures, and 80,000 variations.

    And not one of them is called the 'intel'.

    In fact, the only posture you'll find associated with an 'intel', is the "shoulderhouchedoverkeyboardstrainedneckahansa" -- and that is definetly not a classic Yoga posture.

    There's also the "repetitivestressisfuckingmywristsahansa", and the "mybodywilldieprematurelyfromlackofexcerciseahansa " posture.

    But none of these will be found on a Yoga video.

    And don't get me started on diet.

    Really, "Yoga" is associated with health, while "intel" is associated with unhealth.

    Yoga means the joining of mind and body. Intel means the joining of your arse to the chair.

    There is no possibility of confusing these two things, 'yoga' and 'intel'.

    I suggest the lawyers sow a label onto the back of their trowsers, "shit inside", and then they can sue their own asses off.

  • I understand... (Score:2, Interesting)

    by drudnick ( 568710 )
    Isn't it true that unless a company vigourously defends every case of trademark infringement they become aware of, they may lose certain rights? If they don't use them, the lose them.

    Considering this and the nature of the group using the trademark (read the article) I think they should say "no, you can't use our trademark without approval" and then give them a licence for $1 or some other thing to allow the use.

    Now, of course this assumes that Intel even has a trademark. How you can trademark "'blank' inside" is amazing... I think I will trademark "'blank' is", maybe even "'blank' and".

  • Devil Inside (Score:3, Funny)

    by Jett ( 135113 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @03:53AM (#3252467)
    Here Come The Woman
    With The Look In Her Eye
    Raised On Leather
    With Flesh On Her Mind
    Words As Weapons Sharper Than Knives
    Makes You Wonder How The Other Half Die
    Other Half Die

    Here Come The Man
    With The Look In His Eye
    Fed On Nothing
    But Full Of Pride
    Look At Them Go
    Look At Them Kick
    Makes You Wonder How The Other Half Live

    Intel inside
    Intel inside
    Every Single One Of Us With Intel inside
    Intel inside
    Intel inside
    Every Single One Of Us With Intel inside

    Here Come The World
    With The Look In Its Eye Future Uncertain
    But Certainly Slight
    Look At The Faces
    Listen To The Bells

    It's Hard To Believe We Need A Place Called Hell
  • Intel might as well go after pr0n sites that entice users to Cum Inside®.
  • Intel, "everyone's favorite chipmaker"

    Everyone's favourite? Intel's not inside my computer.

    AMD [amd.com] rules!

  • Ever see those stickers on Antec cases?

    Thankfully it's protected by fair use / parody. I usually toss logos out when assembling a PC but thought that was amusing enough to actually stick on the case.

  • Some Googlevidence (TM!!) (Score:4, Interesting)

    by mattr ( 78516 ) <mattr&telebody,com> on Saturday March 30, 2002 @05:13AM (#3252748) Homepage Journal
    There is a 1997 book on Amazon called Yoga Inside & Out: Exploring Your Chakras with Batsheva here [amazon.com].

    Yoga Inside has been active since 1999 based on work done in 1995 by Mark Stephens in LA juvenile detention camps with six Tibetan monks sent by the Dalai Lama. here [yogajournal.com]

    That book has a website, www.yoga-insideout.com, here [yoga-insideout.com]

    "Inside and Out" is a popular way of describing holistic health, and the phrase "yoga inside" is commonly used to describe the experience, like the site here [yogaexperience.com].

    There is a travel company called Inside India which works with several Yoga therapy centers for health tours, here [inside-india-travel.com].

    Barbara Kallir directed an instructional video guide to tantric yoga, "Inside Westside". Recommended for the Lawyers after those free courses, here [earthlink.net].

    Couldn't find a link between the Dalai Lama and Intel, unless you count that both are successful exiles. Although Apple struck the Dalai Lama from their Asian billboards so maybe ..nah.

    The fourth most popular use of the word conjunction "yoga inside" on the web, after the prison project, the video, and general discussions of yoga and health experiences, is Intel's suit. How many hundreds of millions of dollars of PR is this costing Intel I wonder? Maybe the defendant should get the video publisher to join in, seems like they are making lots of money with their domain name.

  • What about Energizer? (Score:2, Interesting)

    by forkboy ( 8644 )
    Energizer's latest batch of commercials featuring the infamous "Energizer Bunny" had them touting a new catchphrase, "Do you have the bunny inside?" I wonder if they're getting sued next, and if not, how come?

  • INTEL inside (Score:2, Funny)

    by leoaloha ( 90485 )
    So lets all fire up a website with "yourname" inside and see if INTEL will go bankrupt trying to sue everyone
  • From the article:
    Intel's solution is for Yoga Inside to change its name, with the chipmaker covering some or all of the costs involved. "If they went with 'Inside Yoga,' we wouldn't have a problem," Mulloy said.

    Stephens at Yoga Inside has a different answer. He thinks Intel should embrace his foundation and become its primary corporate patron. The chipmaker, after all, already offers yoga classes to employees at its Silicon Valley headquarters.

    Intel becoming their main corporate patron - LOL

  • Everyone seems to be grousing about this trademark dilution bullsh**, but I think you are all missing the point. How many corporate websites use a "/" or a "." at least somewhere in their urls?

    If Slashdot were to hire about 5,000 a**hole lawyers, can you imagine what this would do for our favorite website's bottom line? Folks, we would never have to look at a banner ad, an in-article ad, or any other kind of ad for at least the next 1,000 years!

  • C-Grade Lawyers vs. Groucho Marx (Score:4, Interesting)

    by jmichaelg ( 148257 ) on Saturday March 30, 2002 @10:14AM (#3253400) Journal
    This isn't the first time some idiots masquerading as lawyers have tried to bully someone.

    Warner Brother's staff counsel made the mistake of threatening Groucho Marx because he had announced a new movie with the name "Casablanca" in it. Here is Groucho's initial response... [princeton.edu] What's truly amazing is that Warner Brother's didn't understand how stupid they looked after getting Groucho's initial letter. The exchange continued for several more letters until somebody at Warner Brothers finally got the message.

    Need a sig? Here, have this one...
    Intel Hires Idiots [slashdot.org]
  • I wonder if they'll be going after Kate Bush [epinions.com] next?
  • I'm not 100% familiar with U.S. law, but isn't it perfectly legal in the U.S. to have an identical trademark as another entity, as long as you are not competing in the same industry? In other words, wouldn't it be legal for the foundation to call itself "Intel Inside", as long as they are not maufacturing electronics components?

    OTOH, with stuff like the DMCA, I don't know what is legal in the U.S. anymore.

  • When did the difference between a TRADEMARK and a SLOGAN get so blurred?

    I mean, we don't buy an "Inside brand CPU", do we?? And no one says "Hey, did you hear about that that new 10GHz inside??"

    So this isn't at all like the trademark issue involved with, frex, "Kleenix brand tissues".

  • What's REALLY inside? (Score:3, Funny)

    by Loki_1929 ( 550940 ) on Sunday March 31, 2002 @12:47AM (#3258213) Journal
    Ok, with all this fuss from Intel about "Intel inside" and the mystical powers it endows upon Intel that allow it to sue innocent companies [sfgate.com], I decided to check it out.

    "Check what out?" you might ask. Well, in short, I wanted to check out what's 'inside'. So I did.

    Now, to do this with a Pentium 4 would be silly. It's an expensive chip and I don't like the idea of supporting Intel's legal BS with my purchases. I found a couple of 486's laying around (33MHz if you're curious) and decided I should immediately set out to find out what's 'inside'.

    Noticing the top is one piece told me to focus my efforts on relieving the chips of their bottom plate which I theorized (having neither the time nor the inclination to actually find out) were simply either glued or soldered on. Working under this theory, I tried using a small straighthead scewdriver to scrape away whatever was holding it in place on the outside and try to pry under the plate.

    After realizing this was going nowhere fast, I looked around and decided the best way in was to reverse the process by which it was assembled. Keep in mind I had no intention of trying to actually do anything with what I found, nor do I have the expertise to figure out how any of it worked. I just wanted to see what the hell is 'inside'. I therefore decided to use a small butaine torch. This should, I theorized, heat up the glue or whatever enough to allow me to get into the plate.

    I'm going to say this once and I hope everyone listens... DO NOT TRY THIS YOURSELF WITHOUT GLOVES, LONG SLEEVES, LONG PANTS, AND GOGGLES! Also make sure someone is very nearby (within talking distance) in case something goes wrong. I STRONGLY recommend you NOT try this AT ALL.

    Ok, now torch in one hand, vice grips in the other, I proceeded to heat the plate up as much as possible. Pins were glowing, popping and crackling sounds were easily heart, and I started smelling a rather odd burning smell. Eventually the plate came off (dropped off the first one, was pryed off the second one) and I got my first look at what's 'inside'.

    Take it from me Intel, this ain't worth suing over. Fire your lawyers and go back to making stuff. It's basically a little rectangular piece of material held into place by a bunch of small gold traces (one for each pin). It looks like the hologram cards from the old Marvel X-men cards. Well, I figured I should investigate further, so I lit up my investigation tool (torch) and went back to work. After maybe 10 minutes of torching various places, the chip pretty much exploded. I have to hand it to Intel, their die held up pretty well until the chip blew apart. Basically, there was a loud 'pop' and about half the cpu flew off to my right about 4 or 5 feet. Pieces of the die went all over and it was altogether really cool.

    So anyway, that's the basic story, second CPU didn't explode, and by then I had taken out goggles and gloves to protect myself in case it did. So without further adu, I send you off here [geocities.com] so you can see the pictures of what's 'inside'. Trademarks have been edited out for my continued enjoyment of not getting tossed in an 8x10 foot cell with "Bubba".

    Enjoy.

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