The Shallow Roots of the Human Family Tree

An anonymous reader writes to mention an AP story about research discussing the relatively recent origins of every human on earth. Despite the age of our species, every human on earth can trace their ancestry back to someone who may have lived as recently as the Golden Age of Greece (around 500 BC). From the article: "It is human nature to wonder about our ancestors -- who they were, where they lived, what they were like. People trace their genealogy, collect antiques and visit historical sites hoping to capture just a glimpse of those who came before, to locate themselves in the sweep of history and position themselves in the web of human existence. But few people realize just how intricately that web connects them not just to people living on the planet today, but to everyone who ever lived."

futurama...

[m1ndrape]

I'm my own grandfather...

So Python was right?

[gbjbaanb]

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries!

So, this could be true if we changed mother to 'great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-g reat-great-grandmother' ?

Re:Christians claim to be children of Abraham?

[mypalmike]

This is a song we sang at a Catholic church when I was a kid:

Father Abraham had many sons
And many sons had Father Abraham
I am one of them
And so are you
So let's all praise the Lord.
Right Arm, Left Arm... (There was some weird "hokey pokey"ish dance aspect to it.)

Beatifully Ambiguous Writing

[SpectreHiro]

Despite the age of our species, every human on earth can trace their ancestry back to someone who may have lived as recently as the Golden Age of Greece (around 500 BC)

Well damn, I can trace my ancestry to someone much more recent than that. To boot, I'm pretty sure we all have ancestors that lived during 500 BC... I dare you to find me someone who lacks a living ancestor during anytime past the origin of life on earth and before their own time. I frickin' dare you.

Ohhhhhh... They mean to say that everyone can trace their ancestry back to a single person who lived during the Golden Age of Greece. That guy must've been a stud.

Impressive

[DuckWizard]

Despite the age of our species, every human on earth can trace their ancestry back to someone who may have lived as recently as the Golden Age of Greece (around 500 BC)

This fellow must have been quite busy with the ladies.

Re:Eww yuck!

[bsartist]

Or am I related to Kevin Bacon?

Well I'll be damned - that game really does work. Five steps from me to Kevin Bacon:

1. My niece is Angel Boris [imdb.com]
2. ... who appeared in Dragon Storm [imdb.com] with John Rhys-Davies [imdb.com]
3. ... who appeared in The Great White Hype [imdb.com] with Samuel L. Jackson [imdb.com]
4. ... who appeared in Sphere [imdb.com] with Dustin Hoffman [imdb.com]
5. ... who appeared in Sleepers [imdb.com] with Kevin Bacon [imdb.com].

Re:Eww yuck!

[bsartist]

There is no rationale behind it whatsoever and having a pedigree to show that say, (for the most common example) a white supremacist and Martin Luther King Jr. share common ancestors 60 or so generations back would not change their attitudes.

You're right, it wouldn't change any attitudes. But it would get you a beating from a bunch of pissed-off skinheads.

So our family tree has no forks?

[mrmeval]

WE'RE ALL REDNECKS!

Supposed to...

[Chmcginn]

but I dunno. I mean, they still give me mod points every other week, and I just close my eyes and click.

Re:Family Tree Grafting

[Bing Tsher E]

Yes, hyphenated names are a good way of insuring that a woman bears both her husband's and her father's name.

I've never understood why anybody of a 'feminist' bent would consider that a good thing.

Re:Christians claim to be children of Abraham?

[Triv]

(There was some weird "hokey pokey"ish dance aspect to it.)

He lets the righteous in,
He kicks the heathens out,
He lets the righteous in, and he plops 'em on a cloud
We do the hokey-pokey to prove we're all devout,
That's what God's all about.

--Triv

Re:Christians claim to be children of Abraham?

[alexo]

> [...] the Christian church has always grown the fastest when it has been under the greatest persecution.

Strange, I always thought that the Christian church has grown the fastest when it was doing the persecution.

Re:We All Descend from Noah

[KingSkippus]

Or could it?

No.

And now that you mention it, yes, that is a foul. Please confine yourself for 10 minutes in the Slashdot penalty box.

Re:Not me

[MMC Monster]

You only had one ancester in the 1600s?

Maybe you had some others that you haven't found out about yet. :-)

Re:Family Tree Grafting

[Anonymous Coward]

If you go x generations back, there are 2^x "ancestors" (1 generation before you: 2^1 = 2 parents, etc).

Not down South.

It was only ONE time!

[SnarfQuest]

You know, it was on a Saturday night, after a really long week, and I have never drank that much before, and I honestly don't remember what all happened for the rest of that weekend. I swear, they told me they were over 16...

you are devil-people

[flacco]

evil devil people! every body know that we was all come downe from adam and the whore eve who rode to church on dino-saurs on sundays! this is what jesus teches us.

Re:Beatifully Ambiguous Writing

[tricorn]

If you have any children, chances are so did your parents.

Re:Eww yuck!

[Dlugar]

Angel Boris actually has a Bacon Number [wikipedia.org] of 2:

1. Angel Boris was in Suicide Blonde (1999) with Robert Deacon
2. Robert Deacon was in Wild Things (1998) with Kevin Bacon

(Source: The Oracle of Bacon at Virginia [oracleofbacon.org])

Which makes three steps from you to Kevin Bacon. HTH, HAND!

Dlugar

Re:Indeed, 20% of fathers, aren't.

[Anonymous Coward]

it seems to vary from about 5%, but rates of 20% - 30% are common. So... Guys... have you had a DNA test?

Er.. this is slashdot. DNA tests in this matters are obviously not needed.

Re:Somewhat misleading

[WedgeTalon]

This is where a "+1 Pwned" modding would come in handy.