Ideas For Your Next Tech Startup

prostoalex writes "Business 2.0 magazine enumerates tech ideas that venture capitalists are currently interested in, listing the amounts they have ready to invest." From the article:"A column that appeared on Business2.com the next day described the company Armstrong envisioned and his wish list of criteria. Those who thought they had the right stuff could send Armstrong a business plan. A few weeks later, Armstrong had a new gripe: He'd received more than 20 solid plans and couldn't decide which of three finalists he wanted to fund -- not just for $1 million, but for as much as $5 million. He has since winnowed the list down to two. That got us thinking. Why not ask dozens of VCs a tantalizing (but often unasked) question: What types of ideas would you fund tomorrow if the right pitch landed on your doorstep? After a few weeks of trolling Sand Hill Road and beyond, we got 11 leading venture firms to spill their most promising business ideas -- and to pony up $50 million in funding to the entrepreneurs who can pull them off. "

The Midnight Spelunker

[Anonymous Coward]

Or I should say the Midnight Ass Spelunker. YOu wake up in the middle of the night and strapped to your backside is an automated assfucker. You have to put in your credit card information to get it to stop.

Hmm

[Stevyn]

I'm thinking mp3 player + SMS + ringtones + java

wait, it needs something...

XML!

Alright, I got it, an mp3 player that doubles as a text messaging device. Instead of beeps, it plays ringtones you pick from your mp3 player. Java makes cool games possible. XML makes it seem cool to those who don't realize it just means humans can read the tags I will hide with DRM thus playacting the RIAA thinking people can't pirate ringtones.

I think I'm on to something...

How ironic.

[priestx]

The last time we were talking about Tech Startups, people were complaining about Google picking up all the most potential ones. Then what do I see when I post? A Google ad. Of course there was a Google ad the last time we talked about this... but still..

No one wants to pay me

[Associate]

to sit around playing video games and looking at pr0n all day. Maybe if I open source it somehow.

heheeeeeeeee....

[unixbugs]

WHAT HE WANTS: A startup that can create a suite of open-source applications for maintenance and upkeep of a company's IT backbone. It would give away the programs to corporate clients but charge for service and upkeep at a substantial discount off current rates.

I have a bridge for sale...

With the growing complexity and diversity of the internet and the communities that use it, how they interact, and nature of companies that provide the service, I sure am glad I never specialized in one particular field.

Seriously though, reading that actually made me feel a little better. Alot of the people I know can solve a given problem in a number of ways, feverishly spouting ideas and solutions like there is not tomorrow. From IPPBX to Corporate Intranets, this thing is HUGE. Those of us who have been using Open Source as hobbyists and professionals alike can attest to the sheer diversity of the community. I just read that sourceforge hit 100,000 projects...

Gluing them together is what I do for a living and it is only a matter of time before we come up with something very marketable. Maybe I'll give this guy a call and see if he will buy me a Porsche so I can fly around town from office to office consulting companies and interviewing the bottom half to see how my services can benefit their organization.

Who am I kidding though, I didn't even finish high school :)

I'll give you a hint though, it goes something like this:

Hello, this is Apache 2 calling, press 1 if you are hung over, press 2 if you forgot to set your alarm, press 3 if you are on your way to work allready...

Please leave a message after the tone to explain why you are late to work. Have a nice day!

Wonderful world we live in... everyone at work hates me hahaha...

I got the best idea.

[scruff323]

I got an idea that is sure to be a hit.

A news web site, but not just any news site. One that has a witty address and is directed towards technology. It will be a kind of news for nerds, you know... stuff that matters. It is sure to be a hit!

Yoda says

[Quixote]

... begin, the next dotcom bubble has.

Re:I got the best idea.

[Anonymous Coward]

Let's differentiate from the competitors by posting useless stories with grammar and spelling errors!

Then, we can repeat stories to make it even better!

And post dupes, too!

Re:Weak!

[shawnmchorse]

Administering meds? IVs? Enemas? Who you gonna call?

Crapbusters? *ducks and runs*

Re:It's just because...

[Anonymous Coward]

If you want to take chances, there are investment houses that will take you money, pool it with others and then act on your behalf to invest your money based on the amount of risk you are prepared to take.

I run one of those investment houses. The annual prospectuses have just been mailed out, so I'm afraid there aren't any left at this time. However, if you send a money order or cashier's check and a self-addressed stamped envelope to the address listed below, you can get your money working in the high-risk, high-return world of venture capital.

C.U. Seamy
P.O. box 24601
San Quentin, California 94964

Re:Yoda says

[Anonymous Coward]

Say that, Yoda did not. Respect verb tense, Yoda does. Return to school, you should.

Re:Yoda says

[Anonymous Coward]

Execute order 66!

Re:Weak!

[Tablizer]

Reminds me of a recent slashdot article about some bizzarre japanese medico-toilet which analyzed your various outputs and told your doctor about it.

I find canaries cheaper
             

Re:I got the best idea.

[tjr]

I, for one, would never read such a site. And I certainly would not participate in any user discussions about the news.

Re:It's just because...

[Concerned Onlooker]

If you want to take chances, there are investment houses that will take you money, pool it with others and then act on your behalf to invest your money based on the amount of risk you are prepared to take.

Yes, they're called casinos.

Re:Starting a Company

[Infinityis]

Hmm...I can't tell if you're Larry Page or Sergey Brin and rounding WAY down, of if you're Paul Graham and rounding your /. id way down (bugbear = 448,726). My bet is Paul Graham...you gave yourself away by putting 8 parenthesis in one post.

Re:Weak!

[Concerned Onlooker]

Yep, this is an old idea with a modern twist. Sort of, "I've fallen and I can't log on!"

finally

[duplo]

We have solved step3) ???

Re:No one wants to pay me

[Cutting_Crew]

no way dude, i am trying to patent playing video games now.. dont step on my turf or i will have the DMCA after you!

Re:No one wants to pay me

[ImaLamer]

I'm forking your project

Spelling error

[Anonymous Coward]

"The best advice I can give is to watch your cash flow. I was personally horrified by the stories of $200,000 per month burn rates. I actually had a lot of personal wealth (from my last venture) but still ran out of my basement until I needed more space."

The word is spelled "mom's".

Re:No one wants to pay me

[lanced]

Response 1:

It has been open-sourced. You remember: "you show me yours and I'll show you mine."

Response 2:

Many people do make a great living in porn. But honestly, there is money to be made from people wanting to keep the porn closed-source. I typically use white envelopes, but people still call it blackmail. I never have figured out why.