Senator Blacklisted by No-Fly List

sig writes "Senator Edward Kennedy (D-MA) was turned down for a flight from Washington, D. C. to Boston because his name turned up on the TSA No-Fly list. He eventually got on a flight, but was again denied on his way back to D.C. It took 3 weeks of calls to Tom Ridge and the Department of Homeland Security for the ordeal to get straightened out. But what are ordinary citizens supposed to do if the Secretary of Homeland Security won't take their calls?" There's also a New York Times story.

Answer.

[whiteranger99x]

But what are ordinary citizens supposed to do if the Secretary of Homeland Security won't take their calls?

Umm....get a DAMN good start driving?

Silly Homeland Security...

[Anonymous Coward]

Everybody knows Ted Kennedy is no threat unless you're driving in a car with him.....

There could be an innocent explanation

[John Jorsett]

It's possible it wasn't that they thought he's a terrorist. Maybe they weighed him and decided they didn't have enough fuel.

Clerical Error...

[Rayonic]

He was supposed to be on the No-Drive List.

given the record

[kc0re]

Given the record of deaths in the Kennedy family, Tom Ridge was probably protecting Ted from himself.

well...

[Pidder]

But what are ordinary citizens supposed to do if the Secretary of Homeland Security won't take their calls?

Wear a Ted Kennedy mask?

Re:Could it have been...

[mattlary]

Hey Farva; what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the shit up on the walls?

Re:Answer.

[groot]

Umm....get a DAMN good start driving?

That won't work after the new 'Don't-Drive' rules take into effect on our nations hiways.

Mr. Kennedy (if that is really your name) please step away from the vehicle...

--laz

The fly on the wall...

[petepac]

Ashcroft: Hey Tommy, can you do me a favor?

Ridge: What can I do for you Ash?

Ashcroft: Ted Kennedy grabbed my parking spot in the parking lot at Justice. Anything you can do so I can get back at him?

Ridge: I've got a GREAT idea!!!

Has anyone considered that

[RCO]

this might not have been a mistake?

Re:Answer.

[dekemoose]

Do you really want Kennedy driving? Now that's a threat to the country!

Maybe that's not the real reason.

[hal2814]

I was watching that show Airline that follows around SW Airlines employees and they wouldn't let a couple fly becasue they had too much to drink. Could that be the REAL reason Kennedy wasn't allowed to fly?

It wasn't a blacklist...

[Anonymous Coward]

It was a weight limit.

The last time Ted Kennedy went to the beach, a group from Greenpeace showed up, tied a rope around his feet, and used a boat to try and haul him back into the water....

Too bad...

[StevenHenderson]

Oh come on, it was just an excuse for him to spend more time at the airport bar.

Re:Ironic

[Anonymous Coward]

Funny how a democratic senator is blacklisted after speaking at the DNC. Coincidence?

He was blacklisted several months BEFORE the convention. RTFA!

I heard the speech, however, and
believe me, in this case, preemptive action would have been justified.

good idea

[Arch-out]

sounds like they are now going to ban people that support terrorists.

Re:oh yeah

[xarak]

Governor of California will suffice. I'd not like to be the security guard who has to tell Arnie he can't board.

Re:Answer.

[Anonymous Coward]

I actually am deathly afraid of flying so I hope I get blacklisted by accident.

Re:Publicity Stunt

[TheZax]

Sounds like Ted was staging a publicity stunt to me.

Yeah, my guess is that he called in a favor, got himself put on the no-fly list. Then, when they were going to let him fly anyway, he probably, insisted that he was doing his civic duty to not let himself fly, since he knew he was on the list.

Re:Funny...

[Anonymous Coward]

Is it me? Or does it seem that potential threats have and easier time getting into airports and on board planes than ordinary citizens do?

It's just you. Seriously, one guy has problems because he ends up on the watch list on a prank or a fuck up and everyone starts whining that America is a police state and how their civil liberties have been taken away.

If you think potential threats have an easier time getting on a plane, go dress up like one, fake a passport and see how far you get.

Re: Ironic

[Black Parrot]

> Funny how a democratic senator is blacklisted after speaking at the DNC. Coincidence?

Maybe he's in trouble because the DNC wasn't held in an approved Free Speech Zone.

Re:Well..

[IsaacW]

Since he's from Massachusetts, Senator Kennedy would only cause a disturbance if the chowder had tomatoes in it.

Obligatory Dennis Leary quote

[(trb001)]

"Ted Kennedy. Great senator, but a bad date."

Re:Our gov't at work

[zoefff]

At least the security system is working VERY visible! I can imagine:

'Sorry sir, but we can't let you through'
'Do you know who I am? I AM senator Kennedy!'
'Even if you were the King of Liechtenstein, we can't let you through'
'I'll have YOU fired first thing in the morning!'
'Please do, but could you step out of the line please, sir?'

Or the old joke
'Sorry sir, but we can't let you through'
'Do you know who I am?'
(Intercom)'Can somebody help this person? He doesn't know who he is...'

Ghostbusters

[otisg]

If there's something strange, in your neighbourhood - who're you gonna call?

Ghostbusters, of course!

Re:Our gov't at work

[jbash]

What makes you think your name needs to sound "kind of Middle Eastern" to make it onto the "no-fly" list? Your predjudices, perhaps?

Good point. Maybe we should ALL change our names to Bin Laden. We know they can ALWAYS get on a plane.

It was an accident

[danuary]

For the safety of everyone else, they meant to put him on the no DRIVE list. It was an honest mistake.

I'll just be Tom Ridge

[wadiwood]

before I go flying in the USA, I think I'll change my name to "Tom Ridge", so I won't get hassled...

Re:oh yeah

[ender-]

So, if I were a terrorist, I think I'd start using "Tom Ridge" as pseudonym. Then I'd laugh my ass off when the head of Homeland Security can't get on a plane, and they won't tell him why. :)

Or I wonder if they've got an "immunity" list, so that even if there WAS a terrorist going around as Tom Ridge, the name would never be put on the list. That would be just as good!

Ender-

Re:T. Kennedy

[Anonymous Coward]

According to the 1990 census information, 0.067% of Americans have the surname 'Kennedy' - given a rough poulation of 300million, that makes around 200,000 American Kennedys.


I heard Ted Kennedy got around, but that's ridiculious.

Re:Not on "No-Fly" list but rather the "Screen" li

[Dracolytch]

Reminds me of a funny think my friend Nisa told me (She's from Shri Lanka):

No matter how late you are for a plane, if you have dark skin, never EVER run through an international airport.

~D

Extremely interesting

[Jeppe Salvesen]

If a would-be terrorist/extremist wants to hassle the neocons, that person would just use the names of the lesser known ones as a fake identity and voilà - you'd have angry undersecretaries on airports!

(Yes I'm a bit childish today - it's Friday for God's sake)

Re:Our gov't at work

[jon787]

Here is another variant:

A high ranking Admiral drives up to the gate of a naval base. This base has a policy of 100% check of ID cards and there is a new Marine on guard duty at the gate.
Marine: I need to see your ID.
Admiral: I don't have time for this nonsense. (to the driver) Go ahead.
Marine: Don't do that.
Admiral to driver: You heard me, Drive on.
Marine draws his sidearm and says: Sir, this is my first time on post. Do I shoot you or your driver?

Re:Answer.

[Jahf]

Fuck this country.

You're kidding, right? I've been with 12 people in my life ... no way could I get through the US population in my lifetime. However this does work good as a blanket statement for the following.

Fuck the President.

No. No no no.

Fuck your mom.

My Oedipal complex went away when I was 13, thanks

Fuck you.

That one's easy but not so much fun.

Fuck your friends

If I can pick and choose, gladly. Otherwise I'd have to say no.

fuck the Senate

Have you SEEN those people ... well ... at least Strom Thurmond is gone.

fuck the House

Ok, so maybe there are a couple in there.

fuck all goverment employees.

Only if I can start at the interstate tollbooth, there's usually a couple hotties there. If I have to start at the DMV ... yeesh, have you SEEN those people? Oh wait, I said that about the Senate ... ok, so I'd take this category over that one.

Oh, and fuck you too :P

Bomb!

[dfj225]

My favorite thing at the airport is the sign that tells you what you can't bring on and it has a very cartoon looking bomb on it. That should definetly keep Wiley E. Coyote off of the plane.

Re:You think it's just one guy?

[brandonY]

Eh, there could be lots of other reasons for your wife to get stopped every time. For instance, does she look rather like a young arabic man?

Re:Not on "No-Fly" list but rather the "Screen" li

[Anonymous Coward]

No matter how late you are for a plane, if you have dark skin, never EVER run through an international airport.

Unless your initials are O.J. Then you can get away with murder.

It's a bad 'sounds like' algorithm...

[mdemeny]

... looking for 'Haddi Ou-ard Quani-di'

Re:Answer.

[XMyth]

That's a good idea since Many SUVs are already large enough to take down tall buildings.

Re:My Story

[Anonymous Coward]

Congratulations. You have donated many hours of your life to the training of airport security. There aren't many real terrorists out there, so they had to practice on somebody.

wrong list

[httpoet]

I think they meant to put him on the no-drive list [gfsnet.org].

Mod parent to interesting.

[Anonymous Coward]

I'll bet that no-one named Bin Laden is having any trouble getting on a flight. Heck, when I was stranded trying to get a flight home after Sept 11, 2001, a bunch of these folks had grabbed a plane out of the country.

Re:Our gov't at work

[networkBoy]

Of course, using a pattern of "first initial, last name" is not exactly an accurate means of finding a match for terrorists, now, is it?


simple:
if ($passengerName=~/Kennedy/){$passengerName =~ s/^([Tt]\.)/Terrorist/;}
There you go, run this on the passenger list and there's no question that T. Kennedy is a terrorist!

-nB

Re:Our gov't at work

[Citizen of Earth]

I'd probably take my head out of my ass and familiarize myself with the world around me. It's not as if Ted Kennedy is an obscure personality.

And if Kerry wins in November, suddenly anyone with the name "G.W. Bush" is going to have trouble flying.

Re:Publicity Stunt

[EinarH]

Funny conspiracy teory you got there, almost as funny as the one from Seinfeld back in the days:

JERRY: Hey, so where's my sneakers?

KRAMER: That's what I wanna know.

JERRY: What do you mean?

KRAMER: Well, I saw Mom and Pop this morning, but when I went by the store on my way home? The place was empty. Everything is gone. Mom and Pop - vrooop - vanished.

JERRY: So all my sneakers are gone?

KRAMER: I'm afraid so. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. I've been asking around - they didn't even have any kids.

JERRY: Mom and Pop aren't even a Mom and Pop?!

KRAMER: It was all an act, Jerry. They conned us, and they scored, big time.

ELAINE (amused): So. Mom and Pop's plan was to move into the neighborhood...establish trust...for 48 years. And then, run off with Jerry's sneakers.

KRAMER: Apparently.

Re:Answer.

[RLW]

He should have been on the don't drive list many, many years ago.

Re:What was the true inconvenience?

[FurryFeet]

BTW, my name is as WASP as it gets.

Would it, by any chance, be Fred?
Just a wild guess...

"Attack: Terror kills brains"

[cavac]

This is great. Just as stupid as this forms you have to fill in on the plane when coming from europe and you're not an US citizen.

There are actual questions in the form of "Are you a terrorist?". Yeah, sure, if i were a terrorist i'd check the "Yes" box? And i would check in with my real name at the airport?

Dear security guys: How stupid do you think your average terrorist is?

Re:Our gov't at work

[CristalShandaLear]

I'd probably take my head out of my ass and familiarize myself with the world around me. It's not as if Ted Kennedy is an obscure personality. It's not as though he hasn't been one of the most prominant figures in American politics for the past 42 years. And this happened in Washington D.C. and then again in his home state? How do you excuse that level of ignorance?

Probably wasn't ignorance. Maybe he's just pissed off the wrong person and this is D.C version of being Punk'd.

Senator A: Ted still won't get on board fella's.

Senator B: *giggling like a school girl* Wait 'til he finds out he's on the no-fly list until he rolls over!

Senator A: Dude?! You didn't?

Senator B: Totally.

Senator A: Sweet.

Re:Our gov't at work

[Bearpaw]

And if Kerry wins in November, suddenly anyone with the name "G.W. Bush" is going to have trouble flying.

It wouldn't be the first time someone with the name "G. W. Bush" has had trouble flying ...

Re:Our gov't at work

[Obfuscant]

How do you excuse that level of ignorance?

What makes you think it was ignorance? Maybe there's somebody named Kopechne who does data entry for the list?

Re:Our gov't at work

[Alsee]

It would be a real shame if some terror suspect started using the alias O. Hatch.

-

This is great...

[frkiii]

It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

The Real Reason

[vwjeff]

The Senator was blacklisted to save the airlines money. Free booze in First Class has to have limits.

Re:Witty Republicans

[Artifex]

and conspiratorialists will point to this and say [that] Kennedy is a marked man in the eyes of our new republican overlords.

As far back as I can remember, he always has been.

He's smarter than anyone expected, though.

He's sort of the apple [apple.com] of their ire, then, right?