Your mistake was thinking that there was a blatant falsehood involved. ... He said they were "very fine people"
He did not. He said "you had some very bad people in that group, but you also had people that were very fine people, on both sides." and then went on to say "I’m not talking about the neo-N***s and the white nationalists — because they should be condemned totally.".
Let's not forget that Trump is $0.4B in personal debt to unknown entities, he needs that money.
Do you mean that companies he owns owe mortgages? Ones that can, at worst, easily be covered by selling a few properties?
The emoluments clause was quickly put in place to regulate the receipt of those gifts, and Trump's continuing family ownership of those businesses makes a mockery of it.
I might prefer it if Presidents (and other politicians) were willing to distance themselves from their businesses, but if a diplomat paying a hotel bill to a company that the President is a part owner of is "making a mockery of it", then surely Qatar giving a million dollars directly to the Clinton Foundation, which went unreported to the State Department (as Clinton promised gifts would be) should be even more alarming.
I could start with the fact that if anyone should be making law enforcement requests of a foreign government, it should be the AG, not the president
And the President can't say "the Justice Department is going to call, I'd appriciate it if you'd work with them"?
Next there's the fact that defense-related foreign aid was being used as a bargaining chip
Right, "we're giving you even more money, please work with us" is horrible, but "fire this guy, or you don't get the money" isn't? Just because the first is defense-related? Keep in mind that this was money Obama/Biden wasn't willing to give at all, so saying it was a "risk [to] defense issues" is a bit hyperbolic.
If Hunter Biden was doing anything sketchy at Burisma, for which the best evidence we have is his standard-issue ridiculous board-level paycheck for inexperienced but privileged people,
It doesn't matter if Hunter Biden himself did anything wrong, it's still in his best interest for investigations into Burisma to be dropped.
Then there's the fact that the supposed crime was basically evidence-free and completely illogical. ... Joe Biden's actions only put his son in more legal danger, by pushing for the firing of the officials stonewalling the investigation into Burisma.
Right, the guy who opened an investigation (on top of the existing ones), raided the CEO's house, and caused said CEO to flee the country gets fired, and the new investigator "just happens" to find no wrongdoing. Clearly Joe made things worse for his son, and there's nothing to see here. /s
Then there's the fact that a political opponent was involved.
So we can't investigate Joe Biden, who wasn't in office or running at the time, but people who were literally running against Trump got to both investigate and vote during his impeachment hearings? Can you seriously be presenting this as an argument?
Does this stuffed turbaconducken of corruption with sparklers stuck in it not raise any red flags to you?
Yes. We clearly need a thorough investigation of Joe Biden, to keep an eye on Trump, and seriously rethink how impeachment works.