39 now and starting to notice memory issues.

Bring on the drugs!

So this is why girls can tell when those shoes don't go with that handbag?

I would go for a nice peat bog burial - there's a great chance you would be discovered some 2300 years out. And if not, you'll also live on in some delicious scotch.

There is already an existing, better idea. I don't remember exactly where I saw it, but I think it was in a "Get Smart" episode or movie.

The forward-backward pistol looks like an ordinary pistol but it can fire either towards the front or towards the rear, depending upon which way the user pushes the trigger.

The trick is that it's counter-intuitive.

To fire forwards, you have to get your finger behind the trigger and push it forward. If you pull the trigger backward toward yourself, you shoot yourself.

Although it was hilarious seeing this pistol's peculiarity in a comedy sitcom, I admit that it may not be so hilarious from the viewpoint of a user under stress.

Join us now, and share the...uh nevermind...

*trails off*

Good. Let Facebook go the way of the dodo. It's the equivalent of those "personal home pages" people put up when they first discovered the Web.

If they get a jury trial, every member of the jury should be required to hold at least a Master's degree in some form of engineering. That's the only way to ensure it's a jury of their peers.

If they just pull twelve random people off the street, their eyes will glaze over in about 30 seconds and they'll vote like they were in the audience of American Idol.

Dude - did you live under a rock or something?

We chatted up girls on the internet and texted friends before you had a double digit age! Scoring a phone number when you're 9 might be cool, but you don't know what to do with it.

Aaron: Man, I'm starving. I haven't eaten since later this afternoon.

Ladies and Gentlemen!

See here the man who is unaware of the existence of laptops! Yes, this sad specimen of a Slashdot poster actually believes that all computers have external speakers and amplifiers plugged into them at all times. The thought of using a laptop to play a funny YouTube clip during a break in a meeting has never occurred to this being! Fear him, and pity him!

How about they update the game ... it's so 20th century.

Instead of the boat, car and dog, the player tokens are now leading members of the Republican and Democratic parties.

You can no longer buy properties, but you can repossess them.

If you find you are running short of cash, and you are the biggest player, you can apply for a government bailout (because you are too big to fail), and all the other players have to repay a portion of your bailout for the next 100 years, every time they pass "Go".

The "chance" cards will be named "Bernies", and each one involves you giving vast sums of money to some shady person with a pronounced nose who doesn't work on Saturdays. But beware, because within the "Bernie" cards is the "go to jail for 135 years card".

The "community chest" cards will be named "Reforms", for example the "healthcare reform" card, where you have to pay even more taxes to subsidise people who aren't even playing the game.

We could call it Obamapoly ?