If nothing else, she needs to be taught that she is self-possessed. That this is her life, her body, her decisions. That what other people may want of her can be considered, even negotiated around, but that in the end it is what she wants that should count the most.
She is going to be pulled in many directions, face many things that you and your wife have already passed through and have only the fleetest memories of. To navigate those and other unforeseeable difficulties the best thing that can be bequeathed her is an unshakable sense of self. It will help her through doubts and tribulations. It will be assailed by everything and everyone around her, tempting her to be things she is not. Which is why it is so very important that she has it, holds on it, and knows when to reinvent it.