We have most of those things.
Phones that aren't anorexic, instead being willing to be a bit thicker and sport two days' worth of battery life.
My OnePlus One can easily go three days on a charge, even with moderate use. It's a full smart phone, high end camera, Bluetooth, NFC, wifi, 4G, sensors etc. It's pretty thin too. Most manufacturers realized that there is "thin enough", it's only really Apple that needs to be 0.01mm thinner every year.
Phones with physical keyboards.
Just get a case with Bluetooth keyboard built in. That's the better solution now. You can choose a keyboard you like and easily replace it when needed. It also doesn't limit your choice of phone too much, because otherwise you would be stuck with one or two models at most.
Phones with intentionally lower DPI, for people with less-than-perfect eyesight that still want to use their phone.
Android lets you scale the UI easily enough for that purpose. You don't need a low DPI screen, you just need to make the font size bigger and have everything scale with it.
Phones with a better ability to leverage integrated storage
What does that even mean?
Phones with screens designed to be user-replaceable
Again, with the right case it is almost impossible to break the screen. High end cutting edge phones are only about £230 now, so it's easy to get the risk down to a level where you don't need insurance. If you paid £750+ for your phone, well...