this one will trigger the bejabbers out of you. I married my wife 30 days after she turned 18. Freakin out yet?
More assumptions, I see. Why would this freak me out? Old boomer got married young; news at 11.
Your ~40yr old kid is still unmarried and living in an apartment. Maybe that is tainting your worldview?
I make no assumptions, that is what you are doing. Using an experience is not an assumption Some times it flies in the face of those who do.
Now, you are quick to make some specific assumptions regarding my worldview. Oh, my friend, what is my worldview?
Given the assumptions you have already made about me, you could not be more wrong. Why you decide to diss on my son is pretty weird. He is not married and has no intention of it because of his experiences with toxic women.
My SO, was the VP in her company, and the highest paid person in it, She had entire teams of men working for her, they adored her, but knew when she issued an order, it had to be performed.
Smart, no one's fool, and what you would call a "Boss Babe" today We're complete equals.
But she knows how to be feminine as well, Between the two of us, we do navigation through life. Good to have the feminine and masculine karma.
As well, in an academic environment, I worked with women on programs to encourage young women into STEM careers.It wasn't working too well. Before you blame that on me, they were in charge, not me. But I did what I could, and at their direction.
And that is where my technical/science background got me to question the assumptions that were being made. The same assumptions, the same approaches, the same bad guys, the same victims. We followed them every year, and the results were the same. We polled these young ladies after the programs, and there was one constant - more of the young ladies wanted to be in entertainment as Divas than in any STEM field.
In science/engineering, if you try the exact same experiment over and over, you will always get the same results. Something is askew.
There is also the mantra that in the best controlled experiments, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.
The assumptions were that women and me would be equally represented in STEM careers if only the internalized misogyny of men were eradicated, that women only needed nurtured and men 's misogyny suppressed, and all other impediments removed, these women who were passionate about STEM, but one encounter with a man could immediately destroy that passion drove women to other careers, That's the ticket.
So my interest in why these efforts were a complete failure got me to doing research. I interviewed many women scientists and engineers to get their input.
All said they were sure they wanted to be that form a very young age. All said that nothing was going to stand in their way. Almost 100 percent said these programs were a waste of time.
We did have a few women who washed out. Three became stay at home moms, and one started her own day care. All were happy. The day care woman cried on my shoulder more than once about how she hated engineering. Awkward.
But since retirement at 55, I continued my research on an quasi - amateur level, and have come to some conclusions. The first is obvious,
Men and women have the same intellectual capacity. Any differences are at the individual level.
If a woman wants to be in a particular field, there is no reason she should not.
But if a woman would prefer to be a stay at home mother/wife, and run the household, that is not a bad thing. It's a different thing.
Despite being told that women can "have it all", no, no one has it all.
The present day narrative of working until your mid thirties and mid forties, then marrying, and having children is completely backwards.
That age range is where a person really hits their stride.
It is doubly wrong because there are many women who are in perimenopause in their mid 40s. Female fertility has an expiration date.
Finally, it is triple wrong because of two things. Men who reach that age without getting married are much less inclined to do so, especially if they are going to front the IVF costs.
The other related thing is that men are inherently attracted to youth, beauty, and cooperativeness.
Anyhow, I'm bowing out of this convo. You are as open to changing your opinion as a climate change denier or trickle down economy believer. Any posting I have done is like that, in that I neither expect or care what your opinion is, it is to give others who are perhaps not as locked into their narrative as you re