And while mini nuclear reactors are a real thing, they are a fantastically dumb real thing. Nuclear reactors aren't super safe,
This is false. They really are safe unless you make an utterly insane design. Outside of the USSR where no one was mad enough to build a design like that (and it was also a dual use reactor), nuclear reactors have cause way way way way fewer radiation related cancer deaths than the coal plants they originally replaced. Not to mention all the other deaths. They're one of the safest forms of electricity available. They're about on a par with solar and wind, and until people can make steel effectively without coal, then wind and solar are going to have the coal problem more than nuclear.
Chernobyl reactor was a very smart and safe design
What the actual fuck. It had a void coefficient of +4. That's beyond insane. No one else builds reactors with positive void coefficients like that (CANDU has a tiny positive one kind of on a technicality). It was built that way to cheaply be able to produce weapons grade plutonium and run on cheap fuel.
It was always mad, not a "very smart safe design".
A problem so costly if it gets out of hand that the US's original major nuclear research and production site in of Hanford, Washington
Remind me what a weapons research and production facility has to do with nuclear power?
On top of that nuclear reactors are expensive compared to renewables
You got something right!
Just build some fucking windmills
Now how did Sweden never figure that out? Oh no wait they already did build quite a lot of fucking windmills (maybe that's how they got so many, from the breeding program).