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Journal mcgrew's Journal: The Old Sayings Are Wrong 13

(If the formatting is borked, it's posted at mcgrew.info)

There's No Such Thing as a Free Lunch
        Taken literally, this is patently false, as anyone with a grandmother knows. You may say âoewell, Grandma paid for it so it isn't free.â But it is free â" to you.
        I have a fruit tree in my front yard, and all its fruit is completely free.
        What this old saying means is âoenever trust a salesmanâ. If a salesman offers to buy your lunch, it will cost you.
        From a physicist's perspective, it means you can't break the three laws of thermodynamics; you can never get more energy out of a system than you put in.

You get what you pay for
        This is another salesman lie, with the sales lady getting you to believe that the higher priced item is always better than the cheap item. But you donâ(TM)t always get what you pay for. Often the less expensive item is equal or superior, with over-the-counter drugs being an excellent example. Aleve costs three times what generic naproxin does, yet is the exact same drug.
        And of course there are swindlers. If someone sells you a counterfeit Rolex at a real Rolex price, or a diamond ring with a zirconium stone, you have been swindled and certainly didnâ(TM)t get what you paid for.
        You usually pay for what you get, but often you pay far less than you otherwise did. Just yesterday I saw a âoegoing out of businessâ sign at a Radio Shack, and since I needed a new soldering iron I went in. The iron and solder were a third what I would have paid had I not procrastinated, and I got a TV antenna for five bucks. I got a lot more than I paid for.
        Get what you pay for? Usually, but sometimes you get more than you paid for and sometimes a high priced item turns out to be utter junk.

What goes up must come down
        This was true until July of 1969, when astronauts left man-made objects on the moon. They're not likely to ever come back down.
        There are robots rolling around Mars. These, too, are unlikely to ever come down.
        Then there are the Voyager spacecraft, which are now outside the entire solar system. It's a certainty that these machines will never return to Earth.

Money doesn't grow on trees
        Of course it does, orchards grow lots of money. Not only does it grow on trees, it grows on corn stalks, tomato plants, soybean bushes...

A picture is worth a thousand words
        If it is, then draw me a picture that says âoea picture's worth a thousand words.â Pictures can be aids in communication, and a picture is better than a description, but it's impossible to teach using only pictures.
        However, it is true in a monetary sense, in that a thousand word magazine article will garner a commercial writer less than the artist who made the cover art did.

What doesn't kill me makes me stronger
        Nietzsche was an idiot. Just ask any brain-damaged quadriplegic if he's stronger than he was before the accident.
        Oh, and also, God isn't dead, Nietzsche is.

You can never be too rich or too thin
        Whoever started this stupid meme was a gold plated idiot. Of course you can be too thin. Bulimia and anorexia have killed people.
        The âoetoo richâ is subjective. I'd say if you have more money than anyone could spend in a lifetime when there are hungry people, you're too rich. How can someone like that live with themselves?

Lightning never strikes the same place twice
        It amazes me how gullible most people are, believing everything anyone tells them. They even believe stuff that was proven untrue centuries ago, as in this saying. It was believed for at least hundreds of years and likely longer until Ben Franklin disproved it with his kite and his invention of the lightning rod. If lightning never strikes the same place twice, lightning rods wouldn't work.

Only the good die young
Well, they showed you a statue, told you to pray
They built you a temple and locked you away
Aw, but they never told you the price that you pay
For things that you might have done
Only the good die young
That's what I said
Only the good die young
â" Billy Joel
        I've heard this nonsense all my life, and canâ(TM)t understand why people actually believe that tripe. Yes, some good young people do die way before their time.
        But if only the good die young, then why are so many inner-city young men killed in gun battles with rival gangs? Good people never die in gang battles unless they're not a part of the fight and simply get caught in the crossfire.
        Why do so many young people get drunk and die in their cars when they wrap them around trees? Good people don't drive when they're drunk.
        And if you're Christian, remember that Jesus said âoenone are good, except God.â Only the very young; the small children who die innocent are good. But bad young people die all the time.

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The Old Sayings Are Wrong

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  • It is rare to see something worthwhile on /.

    Thanks for the +1 Funny / Insightful !

  • "Only the good die young is from the bible".Ecclesiastes 7:15 [biblehub.com] There is some truth to it. Draft dodgers get to run for president instead of dying in a strange land, for example.
    • by mcgrew ( 92797 ) *

      It doesn't say ONLY the good die young, and starts with "All things have I seen in the days of my vanity", followed by seeing the good die young and the evil dying old. Remember that when those words were uttered, prople believed that if you died young it must be because you were bad. That passage simply sets it straight.

      Yes, draft dodgers are allowed to run for President, and hypocrites dodge the draft and call for war. Back in the Vietnam war days we called people like Trump "chicken hawks", cowards who w

      • Seems to me that we reached "peak personal social responsibility" back in the 60s to early 70s - idealism is pretty much dead now, with everyone saying "why bother - it won't change anything" so it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. Maybe I'll go listen to the Woodstock album again.
        • by mcgrew ( 92797 ) *

          Maybe that's why you never hear protest songs on the radio any more, and I suspect it's one reason only half of eligible voters show up at the polls.

          • I think this one [youtube.com] could be recycled by switching "Vietnam" for "Afghanistan", "The Taliban", "Iran", "Syrians", and, for Donald Trump fans, "Mexicans"
            • by mcgrew ( 92797 ) *

              I actually did a newer version (parody perhaps) of that song when we were in both Iraq and Afghanistan. I did another, a parody of Steve Miller's "Keep on Rockin' Me," "Keep on Iraqin' Me".

          • I suspect it's because people have been convinced their votes don't matter, and that there are only two choices, and that they are morons if they don't just play along. Of course the "lesser evilism" goes without mentioning... whoops!

            And... there's a missing option. I'm surprised you didn't bring up Hanlon's Razor. It couldn't be more wrong [cia.gov].

            • by mcgrew ( 92797 ) *

              I actually did a newer version (parody perhaps) of that song when we were in both Iraq and Afghanistan. I did another, a parody of Steve Miller's "Keep on Rockin' Me," "Keep on Iraqin' Me".

              I seldom post them.

              • by mcgrew ( 92797 ) *

                Oops, replied to the wrong comment, sorry.

              • when we were in both Iraq and Afghanistan

                :-) Whaddya mean "were"?

                I remember the old protest tunes,

                "Don’t want no war/Don’t want no war/Don’t want no war. Don’t want no job, neither!”

                • by mcgrew ( 92797 ) *

                  I mean tens of thousands of troops. US Soldiers in Afghanistan is like US troops in Japan and Germany. Here's a good protest song from Steppenwolf:

                  Once the religious, the hunted and weary
                  Chasing the promise of freedom and hope
                  Came to this country to build a new vision
                  Far from the reaches of kingdom and pope
                  Like good Christians, some would burn the witches
                  Later some got slaves to gather riches

                  But still from near and far to seek America
                  They came by thousands to court the wild
                  But she just patiently smiled and

                  • US Soldiers in Afghanistan is like US troops in Japan and Germany.

                    Yes, "occupation". Don't let Madison Avenue fool you into believing it's anything else. And have no doubt, the need exists. The thousand year war is not over by a long shot.

                    That was my favorite Steppenwolf album, by the way. They were very good. But, looking back, you discover how little effect the words have. The entire audience still ends up voting for democrats, and republicans. This protest tune [youtube.com] is for them.

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