For those who "just want to browse web", there is Ubuntu LTS. It is basically "install this for normal users for a pain-free experience". The other releases are "We've got this cool stuff, wanna have fun?" If you want stability and the latest stuff, there is a price to pay (usually in lots of dollars).
Next, Gnome doesn't and cannot shove anything down anyone’s throat. See the note about LTS above.
When Gnome 3 came out, it was good enough for those who like cutting edge. I even switched distributions (a big deal for me) just to use it, and later had a hard time using the old gnome panel. Why? Launching applications with the keyboard is fast and cool. What's not to like? And if you really need the menu, it's still there. And if you think Gnome 2 was without problems, then you haven't used a multi monitor setup with different resolutions, or I would really want to know how you made icons on the panels stand still.
Further, I don't know why, but even gnome 3.2 still honours the gconf key /apps/metacity/general/focus_mode. Learn your tools. And if you believe that this feature is so important, go to the gnome design IRC channel and try to explain why it's so important (and not just for you). If they say they don't have enough manpower to support it (and believe me, in Gnome 2 it did have some strange undesirable effects), then volunteer to support it. You can't just yell at developers and expect that to make things better.
Speaking of which, one of the reasons why gnome panel was dropped was because it became an unmaintainable mess. I am glad you liked the result, but someone has to work with the code behind it. Should developers be in command? Maybe not, but in free software their opinion counts. You think that you are a developer. Well great, maybe you should have a chat with the Gnome developers who ported and maintain gnome-panel in Gnome 3 and give them a helping hand?
In short, for something to be done, someone has to do it. You can either do it yourself and/or convince others it has to be done. It is not some random rule someone just made up, it is just how life is.