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User Journal

Journal Journal: iTunes..........can suck my balls 2

I don't use iTunes coz its ugly as hell but I do run audioscrobbler so here are my stats!

Weekly Artist Chart
Week prior to Apr 3, 2005, 13:00
Pos | Artist | # of Tracks played

1 RJD2 40
2 Mase 26
3 Heltah Skeltah 15
4 2Pac 8
4 Wiley 8
6 Nas 6
6 Sublime 6
6 The Smashing Pumpkins 6
9 Notorious B.I.G. 4
9 N*E*R*D 4

Top Artists
Pos | Artist | # of Tracks played

1 Sublime 93
2 Talib Kweli 88
3 2Pac 84
4 Nas 80
5 The Smashing Pumpkins 78
6 Snoop Dogg 69
6 No Doubt 69
8 The Presidents of the United States of America 65
9 Red Hot Chili Peppers 54
10 The White Stripes 52
11 The Offspring 51
12 Kanye West 45
13 RJD2 41
14 Mase 40
15 Notorious B.I.G. 36
16 Jay Sean 35
17 Tali 34
18 Missy Elliott 32
18 Foo Fighters 32
20 Razorlight 31
20 Oasis 31
20 Dizzee Rascal 31
20 Cormega 31

Top Tracks
Pos | Artist | # plays

1 Sublime - Don't Push 9
2 Talib Kweli - Good To You 8
3 Snow Patrol - Somewhere a clock is ticking 7
3 The Game - How We Do (Feat. 50 Cent) (Produced By Dr. Dre & Mike Elizondo) 7
3 James Brown - Think 7
6 Gwen Stefani - Rich Girl Feat Eve 6
6 Tali - Take A Look 6
6 Gwen Stefani - The Real Thing 6
6 The Offspring - Staring at the sun 6
6 Outlandish - Walou (Rishi Rich Mix) 6
6 Damien Rice - volcano 6
6 Ludacris - Pimpin' All Over The World (Feat. Bobby V.) 6
6 Kanye West - All Falls Down (feat. Syleena 6
14 Beck - Readymade 5
14 Razorlight - leave me alone 5
14 Talib Kweli - Going Hard 5
14 Tali - Dont Blame Me 5
14 Razorlight - Dalston 5
14 Placebo - Every You Every Me 5
14 Gomez - Get Myself Arrested 5
14 Lil' Kim - Magic Stick (Feat 50 Cent) 5
14 Joss Stone - Fell In Love With A Boy 5
14 James Brown - Papa's got a Brand New Bag 5
14 Red Hot Chili Peppers - This Velvet Glove 5
14 Akon Ft Kardinal Offishal - Kill Di Dance (Kopa Riddim) 5
14 Talib Kweli - I Try (featuring Mary J. Blige 5
14 Talib Kweli - We Got The Beat (featuring Res 5
14 The Presidents of the United States of America - Last Girl On Earth 5
14 Talib Kweli - The Struggle Continues Feat Co 5
14 Gomez - Love Is Better Than A Warm Trombone 5
14 Kelis - Trick Me 5
14 Sublime - Romeo 5
14 Nowherenearthegarden - Feels Like 5
14 Twista - overnight celebrity 5
14 Tali - Blazin 5
14 Jay Sean - Dont Rush 5
14 Tali - Soul Star 5
14 Andy C - High Hopes (All Over Now) - Mc Tali 5
14 Maroon 5 - Tangled 5
14 The Smashing Pumpkins - Zero 5
14 Nowherenearthegarden - Star 5
14 Talib Kweli - Beautiful Struggle 5
14 Kanye West - Get Em High (feat. Talib Kweli 5
14 Jay-Z - Lucifer Remix 5
45 Dr. Dre - Xxplosive 4
45 Maroon 5 - The Sun 4
45 Puddle of Mudd - Away From Me (Radio Edit) 4
45 The Offspring - Original Prankster 4
45 Gwen Stefani - What You Waiting For 4
45 No Doubt - Cellophane Boy 4

User Journal

Journal Journal: WASTED 9

I am so fuckig wasted. it is christmas eve and my freend helen dropeed me home coz i was too drunk to continue at the pub.

how are u
and how r u going to spend ur xmas eve?

lol drunk slasdoting is fun

User Journal

Journal Journal: I have reclaimed my account. (please read) 11

Hash: SHA1

Hey I am back :)

As most of you know, this account was hacked by some fucker but it
was partly my fault for having a stupid password. So the first thing
I'd like to say is that if he posted any offensive crap in your
journals I am sorry - It wasn't me! Unfoe me people. Also some of you
might be suspicious that this isn't really me, so feel free to
request an email and I will send you a pgp signed one.

The editors set the email address back to the one I used when I
brought my subscription so all I had to do was request a new

To be honest they sorted it all out a couple of weeks ago but I
didn't bother commenting or reading much during the US Election
period, although I am very interested in politics I can only engage
it from an academic level - seeing both the advantages and critiques
of all viewpoints (and of course not finding any I like).

Despite this there is nothing I hate more than arguing with people
about religion or politics.

Version: PGPfreeware 6.5.8 for non-commercial use


User Journal

Journal Journal: Touring the UK 4

Well last week I got to see the North East, an area of the country which I have always imagined to be run down and crappy.

I was pleasantly surprised, I'm sure there are run down parts of these cities but the centers were very nice.

Map of where I went.

1. Started from Leicester
2. Harrowgate
-- There was a large show called the "Great Yorkshire Show" and this really held us up. Didn't get to look around much.

3. Darlington
4. Durham
-- Wow, this place is really nice, full of tourists, loads of great scenery and worth visiting.

5. Sunderland
6. Gateshead
7. Newcastle
-- Stayed the night here and had a mash up, I was really shocked by how friendly people were here compared to the south.

8. Middlesborough
-- Very nice city for shopping, not too crowded and not too big. also loads of clubs

9. Scarborough
-- Full of old people, we stayed the night here and the hotel was exactly like fawlty towers!!

10. York
-- Nice historic town
11. Leeds
-- Much bigger than I thought it would be and very cosmopolitan.

12. Wakefield
-- Not much to say about here.


Journal Journal: Motorshow 2004 6

at the Motorshow 2004 in Birmingham, it was huge and the food prices were ridiculous (£3 pounds for a cheeseburger).

Here are the pictures for your enjoyment

The run down of the day was:

+4x4 Experience

+Thunderbirds show by Ford

+Test Drives

+Live Action Arena

+More Test Drives

+Go Karting

And much drolling at cars all the way through the show.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Poll: watches 13

I went to a great deal of trouble getting a watch that was right for me and looked good.

What type of watch do you wear?

A) Expensive Digital (Plastic Strap)

B) Expensive Analog (Plastic Strap)

C) Expensive Digital (Metal Strap)

D) Expensive Analog (Metal Strap)

E) Calculator Watch (e3e 4m 3L337)

F) Pimp Watch

G) I am CowboyNeal and can't find a watch that fits my wrists!

H) Other!

Operating Systems

Journal Journal: Hey do you want to employ a good looking slacker? 14

Well i was thinking, how should I spend my summer holidays, its about 3 months and I would really like to spend it abroad, the only problem is that i cant speak any languages apart from english and Gujarati and very little French.

Heres where you come in, if you have any needs for a general techie read on..

I will pay for my own travel to where you are as long as the job is interesting and within my capabilities, i would like to get paid but if its in a nice place like Vegas then i might consider doing it for free.

What I am good at:
      Wireless networks
      General networking
      Sysadmin stuff, sshd, derified smtp, mysql, apache, IIS, rdp and terminal services
      filters n shit

Wat i am ok at:
        Programming, python, ada, bit of c++ java bit of C bit of VB
        can pick up new languages very quickly.
        Business decisions and customer services
        Getting rat arsed (like i am now)

What i am crap at:

          physical stuff

I will rewrite this journal when i am less drunk
but tonight was cool
i would really like to work abroad and get paid for it if possible, in America i need a J1 visa so its a bit difficult. it means i need a company to offer me a job before i can even come over there.
In the EC its easy i can work anywhere without telling anyone shit all. Anywhere else I don't have a clue but i would appreciate it if someone could provide information. There is still 1 and a half months left until my summer hols so no rush.

User Journal

Journal Journal: The fire alarm incident. | Visit to Palace of Westminister

Well I finally found out what was going to happen to me for setting off that fire alarm. (see older JE).
I got called into a meeting with the head of all residences. The meeting went well but they had to charge me a fine but they were fair. It was only £75 and cost of repair (£64).
It was a stupid thing to do but hey I was drunk and it seemed a good idea at the time.

I have four weeks off, (three left) from Uni for easter (SPRING BREAK -- well not as exciting) so I have time to catch up with slashdot.
My last semester felt like it passed me by so quickly its unbelievable I can remember like it was yesterday writing a journal asking you for advice on what to take with me last sept, now most of the year is gone only 3 weeks of teaching time left when I get back.


Other Stuff
I got invited by my local MP to visit the Houses of Parlament in the Palace of Westminister. Naturally I accepted -- you can't say no to an all expenses paid trip to London (free travel, food and alcahol).

  • In the morning they took us on a tour of the House of Commons and the House of Lords, this place is amazing all the fucking gold everywhere that they raped from the empire, it looked great. After this we had a few hours to chill in Central London before we got to watch a live debate in the commons.
  • After this we had a debate room in the House of Commons where all of us gathered and met Patricia Hewitt, she is actually really nice and took time out for our group to anwser the questions we had -- she even did her best to not beat around the bush and give direct responses.
  • Then onto the confrence room she had booked where we had free food and drink which I took advantage of and got hammered. It was cool though, we got to meet all three of the Leicester MPs and one from Watford, one from North London and another from Nottingham.
    Day was cool up until this guy, head of Labour Students gave his little speech on why he joined which was a bit leftish. But hey fuck it I was drunk by then so I didnt mind... got the coach home afterwards.

I think this whole thing was a great idea, I have always been interested in politics but this has really made me see myself getting into it eventually. They do have the power to make a real difference. The problem is I don't agree with any of the parties, on one hand I am a free market lover but on the other hand I do see the need for welfare and certain taxes. I am liberal in the sence that I believe people should be allowed to do whatever the fuck they want in private. So how do I get involved?? Start my own party? thats futile my party would have a lot of booze and women we would not get anything done.

User Journal

Journal Journal: BOFH: Protecting bodily waste in the public domain 4

"Youre looking pretty cheerful," the PFY observes, as the Boss rolls into mission control.

Mmmf! he responds, between mouthfuls of a large apple.


Its this fruit, its delicious! he burbles.

What, the cafeterias run out of fried lavatory paper? I ask. Someones going to have to update the menu on their webpage!

Funny you should say lavatory, the Boss continues, as thats just where this item came from.

You nicked an apple from the bog?! the PFY responds. Thats hardly hygienic!

No, this apple is a direct product of our toilet system! he snorts.

You nicked an apple from out of the toilet? the PFY gasps, wrinkling his nose.

NO! No, the company signed up to a sustainability and reduced ecological impact initiative a couple of years back, and this is one of the outcomes!


Simple. For the past two years weve been sending our effluent to one of those biodome things as a raw product for their planting system.

Weve been giving them crap? the PFY asks.

For want of better wording, yes.

So does that mean were giving our clients a break? I ask, rhetorically.

AND THE OUTCOME OF THIS, the Boss continues, ignoring me, is fruit and veg, free for the taking, in the cafeteria!

So let me get this straight, I ask Youve been giving my excrement away to people.

Its crap! the boss responds.

Its MY crap, and I work long and hard choosing the products to eat to make it high yield fertiliser.

It wouldve got sent to the bloody sewer system anyway, the Boss replies.

If I so choose to release my products to the public domain, so be it. However, if you take something which is mine, which I created, and give it to another well thats theft!

Yeah, sure, the Boss snaps wearily.

I thought about it, and created it, its my intellectual property!

I doubt it!

. . . three days later . . .

What the hell is this? the Head of IT snaps, crashing into mission control, waving a piece of paper.

A ... piece of paper? the PFY suggests.

Well? he asks, ignoring the PFY and addressing me directly.

I cant see from here.

Its a letter from your solicitors, saying theyre going to take legal action against the company and all the staff in the company who took any of the free fruit and veg earlier in the week!

Oh that! I said. Yes, about the company stealing my IP.

They stole your excrement! he snaps.

So you agree they stole it? I ask.

No, I didnt mean that, I meant it was just ... shit.

It may be shit, but it was incorporated into a better product without my permission.

And so if we dont. purchase a licence to your excrement youre going to sue us.


But we dont want your excrement its smelly and worthless.

That may be the case, but parts of my excrement made up the fruit and veg you took, without my permission. And as I dont license components of my excrement, just the excrement, youd need a license for my excrement to own the fruit and veg.

Its SHIT! he snaps.

There would be few people in the world who would disagree with you. However, my thought went into its construction, and its my intellectual property.


Im not arguing with you.

OK, how much is the licence?

50 quid.


Yes, now. Course if you wait till after the court case, the price might go up.

Thats extortion!

Im not going to argue with you about that either.

But what good is an excrement license to me?

Well, should you want to use my excrement for something in the future you have a license for it. And you can keep eating the free fruit and veg!

So what PART of your excrement contributed to this carrot?

Im afraid Im not at liberty to disclose that.

Well Ill tell the biodome to stop using your crap.

It would mean a complete cleanup, start from scratch, to remove all the vestages of my IP from the ground substrate Very costly. And it wouldnt help all you people who still have the fruit and veg.

So let me get this straight I buy a poo license from you for 50 quid.

At todays prices, yes.

And you allow me to keep eating free fruit and veg.


And if it transpires that you used a toilet that didnt empty into the storage container, but into the sewer instead would you refund me?

Well no, because you bought a licence to use my poo. Contained in that license is the option to use things made from my poo. But you can still use my poo.

So if there was none of your poo in the biodome, Id have paid you 50 quid.

At today's prices.

Yes, at todays prices, for nothing.

No, for the license to use my poo.

Right, well Im not paying.

Well, I guess Ill see you in court.

. . .

Are you really going to take them to court?

Depends on how much money I get outside of court. If I get a lot, Ive lined up a private investor wholl buy all the rights and then charge an annual support fee.

If not?

Dunno, I might settle for a couple of pints and a pickled egg at the pub. So, was that a pear you were eating yesterday?

You bastard.

I dont think Bastard goes anywhere near to describing the unmitigated scum sucking, bottom feeding toerag that is me. But hey who knew shit could be worth so much ®



Journal Journal: Tonight's Dinner 4

1 block medium egg noodles
2 Minted lamb burgers (frozen)
1 large carrot
Add tomato ketchup to taste.

Put the burgers in the oven for 20 mins.
Boil some water then add noodles for 5 mins.

Put the whole lot on the plate with the carrot.


User Journal

Journal Journal: What exactly have I been doing? 4

A Day in the Life of a Student

I haven't posted here in a while but I assure I am still keeping up with all your journals (even if I don't post much).

Life is really busy right now, even on a day like today where I had nothing to do I have not had time to come online until now (01:30).
I woke up at 12 today and realised I had missed all my lectures, as usual! Then called up some mates see where they were, lucky for me they were just downstairs so I go down and say "You feel like Pizza Hut buffet for breakfast?".
We were all in agreement and set off for the all you can eat deal. I only managed 8 slices :( my record is 14.

After we were through we walked around the bullring aimlessly for a few hours, I was kind of looking for a valentines present but didn't see anything that caught my fancy.
We played pool for a bit at our local scream pub. Ended up back home at 6ish chilled in the kitchen while everyone was cooking. Watched a few episodes of Blackadder series 3 (the best IMHO) and had a really small dinner consisting of a ham and cheese toastie sandwich, some pop tarts, a banana and an apple (beat that tuxette!). Spent the rest of the evening in there just talking about simpsons, family guy, king of the hill and beauvis and butthead.
thats just today

The last few weeks

Had a packed few weeks really and haven't got around to doing some of the things I have been meaning to do.
Stuff that has been keeping me occupied:

  • My dad has gone on holiday to India. This means I need to know where all his money is stashed (bank acct, shares/stocs, shares in other peoples names, money he has in India, land he owns... you know "just in case".
  • Module exams. These went rather well especially considering I didn't go to lectures for atleast 8 weeks in some of the subjects.
  • Fire Alarm Incident. This was a stupid one, after our exams were finished we decided to go out and celebrate (I hadn't drank since christmas). Me and Ryan ended up totally fucking mashed up and got into some Greeks who live on another block in our residences, they were final year students I don't even know what it was about but I set off their fire alarm on the way out... stupid mistake I know, they caught me from the CCTV footage. The next few days we had to fill out an incident report and write a few letters of apology to some key people. I haven't heard the last of this yet - I will have a hearing with the university dicipline board, they punishment could be getting thrown out of residences, getting thrown out of uni, paying a £200 (GBP) fine, or a repremand. Should be interesting.
  • Grandma coming to stay at my house (leicester not here at uni). Shes coming for two reasons really, she lives with my mums oldest brother right now and he is having an extention done to his house at the moment - the dusty conditions are not good for an 89 year old with asthma and only one functional lung. The other reason is to keep my mum from being lonely at home on her own because I am here and my dad is in India.
  • Girls There are two who I have my eye on at the momement, one I'll call Tall Northen Girl. shes not taller than me but she is very tall for an Hindu girl and Northen becuase she has a sexy newcastle accent. I have lets say been making progress with her even though shes got a boyfriend in another Uni! I'm not complaining shes going to cheat on him soon so it might as well be with me.

    The other one is more of a quiet one, she doesn't go out drinking or anything so I hardly get to see her, I need an excuse to go to her flat but I can't think of one :'( (any ideas?) The thing is I met her one week before the christmas holidays, then a month off from uni and now we have been back here 3, I have not seen her since - I have her number too but will she remember me???. She's single so its cool but being the shy type it's harder to siduce her. It is a shame she has a great personallity well both do! I can't decide who I want.

As you can see I'm having fun.
This is really just an upadate for anyone whos interested.

User Journal

Journal Journal: Not wanting to be left out... 2

I have created a nation like everyone one else it seems.

The Kingdom of OrganizedKonfusion

The Kingdom of OrganizedKonfusion is a tiny, socially progressive nation, renowned for its complete absence of social welfare. Its hard-working, intelligent population of 5 million enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

There is no government in the normal sense the word; however, a small group of community-minded, liberal individuals is effectively ruled by the Department of Commerce, with areas such as Religion & Spirituality and Law & Order receiving almost no funds by comparison. Income tax is unheard of. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Basket Weaving, Information Technology, and Cheese Exports industries.

Crime is a major problem, probably because of the country's utter lack of prisons.
OrganizedKonfusion's national animal is the pcb, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its currency is the pound.

anyone got a region I can join?

The Courts

Journal Journal: 20031219 - 02:13 9

I am a total arsehole to women I really care about.

Well not care about but well, the ones I am attracted to lets say.

So today I was on a date with this girl I have been involved with in the past. We had a great time catching up, we ate together at bella pasta (50% student discount) then chilled out in a quiet bar.

That is when I realised that over the whole time I have known her I have hardly made any effort with her and she is the one that always calls me, that texts (SMS) me, that arranges to meet me.
While I just go on in my own world totally oblivious of her! This is sad because she is an amazing person and when I get tired of the player lifestyle I'd love to spend the rest of my life with a girl like her, I'd love a girl like her to my be mother of my children, but I am afraid that if I met somone as caring and sweet as her I'd push her away, because of what I am like.

I make no apologies, this is just me.
here is an example: after our date I let her walk back to her sisters car and went out clubbing with other friends... quite a successful night we had fun. but looking back at it, its not the nicest thing to do to a girl is it? its basically saying : "OK IT WAS FUN TONITE BUT NOW IM GOING TO THE CLUB TO FIND SOME SLAGS WHO WILL SUCK MY COCK, FOOD WAS NICE WASNT IT".

There was a time when I had a chance with her but I didn't take it, and now after all my neglect its probably over. Oh well I wasnt ready for a serious relationship but when the time comes I don't want to be like this.
Christmas Cheer

Journal Journal: I envy your cold weather 7

I'm stuck here in sunny Birmingham while I read your Journals of snow and road blocks...

Wish it was like that here!

Oh yeah here is something cool, type the words:

Miserable Failure

in goolge and press I'm feeling lucky.


Journal Journal: Long TIME no JOURNAL! I need to write this down. 1

I need to write this down for two reasons, the batterys in my keyboard are dying rapidly and I think I'm going to fall asleep soon.

I have been up since 12:00 (pm) on friday. The day started off as any other friday. I got the train home from Uni with my friend and arrived home at 18:00, after having a bite to eat I went to see my grandma and my cousins who both live on the same street.

**I recieved a text message** telling me that it is the LAST night ever at TRAZ. Let me elobrate about TRAZ, its the first club that ever let me and my friends in... at the age of 14. We thought it was great, we still do. And over the years we have been going there nearly every week. Over this summer I spent many an evening in there. I believe it to be a huge part of my growing up.

I have experienced everything in that place, from the highs of sex in the dirty toilets to the lows of passing out on the main stage and lying there in a pool of your own sick until you friends find you.

Also I have met hundreds of amazing people there over the years, I only ever saw some people I have grown apart from since high school and college there.

**The last night of Traz**

It was great nearly everyone from our group was there many making special journeys back to Leicester just for the event. Towards the end of the night it got a bit crazy everyone stealing sign's and posters for souveneers.

You see TRAZ was a community more than a night club and we all loved having a place like that where we could belong, a place where seedy lesbians, Scruffy looking rockers, Punks who spent far too much time on their hair, people of all colours could get along and not give a fuck. There were hardly ever fights in there. Alchol was cheap, girls were interesting people as opposed to most that you meet in normal clubs.

I managed to get a coathanger from the cloak room, not the greatest thing but a sintimental treasure I assure you. I will treasure it. I will speak of this place to my grandchildren.

Intrestingly I saw a woman who dragged her son along, I'd guess she wanted to show him where his mommy went out when she was young.

The place was supposed to close at 2AM and if they disobey this then they lose their licence but since they were closing anyway the dj's didnt give a shit and kept the tracks spinning until 4AM. The staff behind the bar turned all the taps towards the dance floor and it was like dancing in the rain. TRAZ has been sold to a strip club chain so some of the girls who were soaked with water decided to give us a wet t-shirt show. One of the dj's got carried away and started stripping! crazy fucking shit. I am going to miss this so much, it has been there as somewhere you can go anytime and you'll meet some people you know.

I got home at 4:30 after dropping a friend home, I just couldnt sleep when I got back. My mind was just going through the memories of traz thinking about the great times. suddenly it was 7am fuck time to wake up for work.

I finished work at 17:30 but had to pick up 3 of my cousins and drop a co-worker home then babysit them until 20:00.

Now its 21:39 I have written this for my own refreence I wish I had more than a coathanger to remember it by. atleast I have this if my memories fade.

You might think this is a very insignificant thing to get sentimental about but its the little things in life that keep you sane, this was one of mine.

Anyone got similar stories?

Jorg, I have been trying to follow your advice as best as I can, I have only drunk 2 days in a row once in the last month. That was wednesday and thursday.

I got really drunk on thurday and don't remember shit that happened to me that night. Fun though. I agreed to join a skiing club.

Did the coding of a project in a day, piece of shit ADA95 so stupidly easy. I have only been to 2 or 3 of the lectures and still know more than half the hopless motherfuckers who want to do computer science. hahahaha they are the fool's whos jobs will be outsourced to india. And you know what I'm going to be the one who owns the outsourcing fucking company. fuck them. serves them right. if you want to be a money grabbing bitch become a lawyer.

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