I'll just be over here, you know, warming up the ol' ball shocker. Of course, they might just "accidentally" expose him to sunlight on the way back. Everyone will pretty much just shrug and say "Whoopsie!" after he bursts into flame...

Well couldn't the judge just whack them on the forehead with his gavel, then? Just like order everyone to approach the bench and then just reach out and whack them? That's why I never seriously considered going into law; I'd be way too tempted to do that at some point. Yeah, I know, I should probably talk to someone about my rage issues...

IIRC, even if the gravity is 0 you still have mass and inertia to deal with. "Heavy" stuff will be harder to get moving and stop moving once it's where it's supposed to be. Also, with Newton's third law, even tossing something with fairly low mass will have an effect on your position. So you'd have to brace or bounce off a wall or something. That would probably make the logistics of unloading a large cargo fairly... interesting...

Ooh! Dibbs on that job! I was just thinking the other day, there are a lot of people out there who need to be punched in the face, and I'm just the person for the job! I need an Obama executive order creating the US Office of Face Punching and making me the director! We could issue a license to punch anyone in the face who needs it! After I got back from a week at the Fox studios, I could get to work on this sort of thing! I'd probably need some helpers though. There seem to be a lot more people who need a punch in the face than one person can get to.

Corporations, you could just punch the guy in the face whose call it was to file the lawsuit. Or just everyone in the corporation, in particularly egregious cases. Like Fox News.

Aww yeah. I think it's a great idea!

Don't blame your inability to get a date on porn and video games! Maybe people just don't want to date people who write long papers blaming their inadequacies on anything other than themselves! Try being a better human being and maybe you'll be able to get a date!

How else am I supposed to learn about Miracle Prostate Supplements and that I should be buying gold because the economy sucks?! If nobody watched the ads all our prostates would be shutting down and none of us would have gold!

Just an aside to the folks for whom the Miracle Prostate Supplement commercial sounded like you; if you have to go to the bathroom every few minutes you might want to get that thing looked at. Otherwise you might not have to worry about where to put all your gold for too much longer...

My dream scenario would be the judge announcing that he's taking a judging job in South Africa (Like the Monty Python Bit) and sentencing them both to death!

Mmm, I notice the veteran cashiers at the local grocery have EVERY produce code memorized. I mean, you could go through there with some tamarind pods or tomatillos and they'll just know the code for it. They got nothing to do but sit there, swipe stuff through the laser scanner and memorize every piece of inventory the store has. I bet if they just had numeric codes and not laser scanners, it wouldn't take them all that long to memorize the codes for every piece of inventory. A few months at most. But for some reason, they'd still have to call for a price check on tampons when you're in there buying them for your girlfriend.

And if passed will only cause the state to waste money defending against a lawsuit they can't win. Someone who lives there might want to point that out to them. Unless you enjoy your tax dollars being wasted on such endeavors.

Keep telling yourself that, Mr 131916.