So, the result is that we must allow "vile" speech even if it is distasteful. THAT is the most ethical way to proceed. Anything less than that is simply vile censorship ;)
Look, no one is saying that it should be a criminal offence to insult Barack Obama or fat people, or whoever. You can be as vile as you like. But you can't expect everyone to give you a platform for your vileness, and say that if they won't they oppose free speech and are evil because censorship.
A site like reddit is perfectly entitled to say that being associated with borderline child porn, stalking, hate speech or whatever they like is wrong and you'll have to go elsewhere to say it.. They're not the government.