I, however, will buy them:
Remote Start: My car has a rotary motor. One lovely aspect of its design is that it really should be gotten to operating temperature before driving under any sort of load. And in the winter, I'd love to be able to warm the engine and the interior from inside my house while I gather my things for work.
Crash reporting: Agreed on sensor redundancy but at the same time, part of the reporting includes detection of airbag deployment, ABS / traction control usage prior, speed prior, and more. This data is used to help triage the severity of the crash before the EMTs roll out. Can all this be made redundant and air-gapped whilst remaining useful?
Theft recovery: I've not heard of any remote-drive systems, only telematics to locate and shut down. The telematics is used to determine approximately when and where the car is moving, or when it was last driven and where to. Makes it easier to track down quickly before it's parted out. Also, in extreme cases, the OnStar / Bluelink / et al. system can actively end a felon's joyride by cutting throttle, braking, or cutting the engine entirely. Then it can honk and flash the lights to attract the authorities' attention.