Sorry, but that's just straw-man paranoia.
Almost all of these schemes (a) adjust within a preference (b) allow you to override and (c) don't allow anything to be broken remotely. And you can stay out of them entirely. In fact these schemes don't need everyone to participate nor in the same way. But if you play passive-aggressive you're going to get some oversized bills for no gain in effective control or comfort.
Conversely there are plenty of dumb pure-commercial solutions out there. Including the one with fixed user name and password "admin" and "1234" exposed to the Internet. No "government" nor "utility" involvement in that one.
In our case you set a desired base temperature and any adjustments are relative to that, so you can be as warm or cool as you like relative to the next person.
We also take security seriously and will not allow any remote access however much the bling might sell it until we've had enough scrutiny to get it right.
A well engineered system should actually improve comfort and control while being deft enough to slip in savings.
Rgds
Damon