Here's some good sigs/one-liners ranging from funny to "philosophical" in nature. I have more, and I will post them later. Most of them aren't mine, so don't give me any credit. (Welcome to my 2 new fans, total is now 12!)

I posted this as a comment, but for those of you who may not have seen it, I thought it was funny enough to throw in the journal.

Slashdot should be a text adventure game.

You are on the main page, generated for you by a beowulf cluster of soviet russians.

There is a troll's keyboard here.
> GET KEYBOARD
You are now carrying the troll's keyboard.

Mr. Anderson, 26, of 216 Matrix Way was killed last thursday when an Apple Lisa fell on him and crushed him.

Mr. Anderson was survived by a massive collection of hard drives, ranging in size from 10 MB to 200GB.

Since whacko jacko felt the need to air his stupid home movies on FOX recently, I feel the need to make fun of him.

• Q: What do you call a pop star who abuses his kids?
  A: Michael Whack-Son
• Q: What do you call the period of time when Michael Jackson was black?
  A: The dark ages.
• Anybody (male or female) who sleeps with Michael Jackson is gay. (It's true!!)

I apologize for my incredibly unfunny jokes in my last journal entry. Despite those, I now have 10 fans and still only a single freak.

And now it's time a new slashdot motto:

• Slashdot: More fun than a beowulf cluster of monkeys!
• Slashdot: With this many references to porn, it's amazing we aren't hosting any!
• Slashdot: News for nerds, without all that annoying stuff that matters.
• Slashdot: Have you slashdotted somebody today?

It's time again to make fun of everybody's least favorite dick-tater, Saddam Hussein!

• Why doesn't Saddam Hussein like ghosts? Because they can't be tortured!
• Why is Saddam Hussein SoDahm Insane?
• What does Jacques Chirac call Saddam Hussein? Mon Ami.

This is just to weed out any commie-pinko-liberals who may have accidentally become my fans. After all, 8 fans and only 1 freak is a bit unbalanced.

A professor was teaching his class and it was time for a quiz. He announced "Okay class, I'm going to give you a quizical."

After the class, a student approached the professor and said, "I noticed what you called the quiz. What do you say when it's time for a test?"

**

Only one joke today because I'm having a bad day, plus it was a long joke. I noticed I got another fan, bringing the total to 4. And I thought it was just a crazy idea that would never work.

This entry is dedicated to insults.

• You're so ugly not even Michael Jackson would sleep with you.
• You smell so bad you got kicked out of france.
• You're so stupid you think you can only listen to AM radio in the morning.
• You're such an idiot, you think FM means something dirty.

I see I have one new friend. I don't know if this is a result of my journal or of my comments. Please comment.

Holy cow, we're taking baghdad?

That's what happens when I sleep late.

Anyway, inspired by a certain slashdotter with too many $ signs in his/her/its user name, I have decided to post random jokes in my journal when I feel like it.

Jokes: