Now siri will randomly call my sister if I don't set the phone down correctly.
His sister's name is "nippl-e."
The term "telecommunications" means the transmission, between or among points specified by the user, of information of the user's choosing, without change in the form or content of the information as sent and received. (47 USC 153)
And the telcos reply with "But we do change the form, content and/or 'points specified by the user' of the information. How else could we inject tracking http headers and ads, and clone the information to Room 641a?"
Clearly they are not a telecommunication service.
..for heavier internet censorhip
You've got to be pulling my censorleg.
The answer to the question of Life, the Universe, and Everything is... Four day work week, Two ply toilet paper!