Virginia Spammers Go To Jail, And Pay For It 326
An anonymous reader writes "A Virginia appeals court has upheld the first felony conviction under a state anti-spam law. In the process, the court also suggested that spam recipients might be able to sue spammers for money damages. According to the court, taxing a person's servers with unwanted e-mails is a form of trespass, little different than intruding on their land or making unwanted use of their private property. Perhaps because of this decision, spammers will soon find themselves on the receiving end of a million dollar class action suit."
Nine years for annoying AOL Customers.... (Score:4, Funny)
A more suitable punishment... (Score:4, Funny)
Trespassing (Score:4, Funny)
Does this mean if I receive spam from him, I'm legally allowed to shoot him?
Now that's what I call justice (Score:2, Funny)
Re:ObNelson (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Trespassing (Score:4, Funny)
In Virginia . . . (Score:2, Funny)
Really... I never knew it until I moved here!
Re:So if we have VOIP (Score:2, Funny)
Re:A more suitable punishment... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:ObNelson (Score:5, Funny)
At the penitentiary... (Score:2, Funny)
Murderer: What you in for, boy?
Spammer: Uh... I... I, uh... sent people spam emails... lots of 'em...
Murderer: That make you feel tough, boy?
Spammer: Oh no... no... not at all... got pretty rich though...
Murderer: That so? Well, Daddy's gonna make you his pretty little rich boy... [resting arm on Spammer's shoulder and winking]
Spammer: Guard!!!! Help!!!!!!!
There's an easy solution... (Score:5, Funny)
...just talk dirty to them. Ask them what they are wearing. If it's a girl, ask if she is wearing tights and whether she is menstrating just now. They won't be phoning you back ever again and it's not an obscene call as they dialed you. Everybody wins!!
Another classic would be a three-way call, though I've never done this with an incoming sales call. Simply put them through to the customer service desk of one of their competitors. Sit back and laugh as they argue with each other.
Other people suggested get an answerphone. That's just not practical for most people. If the volume of sales calls grows over the volume of personal ones then it might be worth it. But I don't want to spend the rest of my days listening to short "could you call me back?" messages from friends. If I'm going to be doing their tech support they might as well be paying for the call! ;-)
Re:Trespassing (Score:5, Funny)
You just have to say the magic words. It's very important to use your best Edward G. Robinson tone, of course: "He was trespassing, see. Yeah. And I was fearing for my safety, see. And the safety of my loved ones, see. Yeah, see."
It's important to be assertive about such statements. You can't sound hesitant, or imply any misgivings. That's why these are the two most useless words in the English language: "But, officer..."
Oh, and don't shoot them in the back. And if you do, stand them back up, and shoot them again in the front. Those CSI guys can figure it out, but once they've heard your Edward G. Robinson, they'll let it go.
Note: this is not good advice. Do not follow it, or taunt Happy Fun Ball, either.
ObBash (Score:5, Funny)
We're getting there.
Expected listing on EBay (Score:3, Funny)
Judgement against spammers Sergey Popovich, Kiev, Georgia and Chi Xiangjung, Nanking, PRC. For 1,000,000,000 $. Awarded by Virginia Commonwealth Supreme Court. Buy-now price 5$. Opening bid 1 cent.
Also you will get emails like this:
Allow me to please introduce myself. I am Michael Dewy of Dewy, Chetham and Howe, attorneys at law, Richmond, VA. I have recently won a judgement for 1 billion dollars against two spammers in Taiwan. This is my proposal to you. Please advance me the money needed to finance an expedition collect the said sum from Taiwan and we can share the proceeds 25% to me and 75% to you.
Re:ObNelson (Score:3, Funny)
CL@$$ act10n L@wsu1t!!! (Score:2, Funny)
--insert random text from random book--
Re:ObNelson (Score:3, Funny)