Techies Asked To Train Foreign Replacements 765
Makarand writes "David Lazarus of the San Francisco Chronicle is reporting that Bank of America (BofA) is moving thousands of tech jobs to India and has asked its techies to train their Indian replacements or risk losing severance pay. Although there is nothing in writing that says precisely this, the employees have been made clear about this responsibility in their meetings. BofA is outsourcing tech work to Indian companies whose employees do the work at half the cost of what a U.S. worker gets paid. According to an estimate, outsourcing has allowed the bank to save about $100 million over the past five years."
Obligatory (Score:5, Funny)
Actually... scratch that.
More good news in 2006... (Score:2, Funny)
Oblig. Quote (Score:5, Funny)
4 letters... (Score:3, Funny)
B. O. F. H.
Evil. (Score:5, Funny)
From a business standpoint, it's neccessary (the training, not the outsourcing), but it's still evil.
Kinda makes you want to have some fun with crontab and shell/perl scripts.
Like keep randomly changing posix group, ou, or dn info in the LDAP directory.
There was a perl script I wanted to write a while back called "jackass-milter" for sendmail. (a take off of spamass-milter, for spamassassin).
All it was designed to do was take each message that passes through the exchanger, constrain to body text (not attachments, or headers), then run a series of regex's on the body based on what the author wants to do to the message.
Example? Regex searching for things like
A good regex that searches for nouns and verbs and randomly replaces it with the f-bomb. Another good one is to search for all instances of "the", but only randomly replace it with "teh". Spell-checkers be damned!
What does this have to do with Indian-outsourcing? Sabotage. Make sure you do enough damage on the way out the door. Nobody gets out alive.
EVERYBODY GET DOWN!!!!111one one one
(here he comes....here comes speed ra-cer...)
Re:Isn't that really... (Score:5, Funny)
vindaloo. stings more.
Re:bunch of things (Score:5, Funny)
The proper way to benefit from trickle-down economics: kneel at upper management's feet. Aid them in removal of pants. After they've swung the hatchet enough on your brethren, they'll undoubtedly start to perspire, and condensation will form on their genitalia. Wait patiently for it to fall, then complement your utter superior on the salty goodness.
The wrong way to benefit from trickle-down economics: criticizing Republicans and SUVs. You may as well vandalize George Washington's grave with a back hoe, traitor. Why do you hate America, m874t232?!
Re:Isn't that really... (Score:5, Funny)
Sure, but doesn't mean you can't teach your replacment a thing or two about being a bad employee.
You: "Ok Vishnu, when you write code make sure you never use indents... Managment hates that. And keep everything on same line. Oh and never ever EVER comment your code unless you want to talk about your current mood and what you had for breakfast that morning."
Vishnu: "I see..."
You: "Oh... Also... Make sure you take your phone off the hook and never delete your voicmail so that no one can leave you a message. It will make you look uber busy... Make sure you never reply to his emails regardless of what the urgency is because he'll think that you are working hard and too busy to play with email all day. And you'll get a raise pronto."
Vishnu: "What does 'uber' mean?"
You: "It means you know what you are talking about... You should use uber in every sentence when you are talking to the Boss in the states. You'll get a raise for sure. Also... When he does call make sure you have some of the Punab music...
Vishnu: "Punjabi..."
You: "Whatever... Just make sure it is playing playing really loudly in the background every time he calls. He will apprecieate your culture."
Vishnu: "Oh thanks for your wise teachings..."
You: "No sweat. And one more thing do you read Slashdot?"
Vishnu: "What is that?"
You: "Oh great... If you don't know what Slashdot is... You'll loose your job for sure!"
Vishnu: "Oh no!"
You: "Well buddy... I'll clue you in. Reading Slashdot is more important than actually doing any work at your job and you should always have it open at work and hit refresh every few minutes to see if there are any new stories. Then if you see anything that you don't have authority to talk about you need to make a comment with outrageous claims so that you get what they call 'modded up' and everyone will think that you are the head honcho and you'll great a raise for sure! Not only that but the more mod ups you get, the better karma you'll have!"
Vishu: "Oh blessed karma! Thank you American sir!"
You: "Anytime."
Re:Isn't that really... (Score:4, Funny)
Vishu: "Oh blessed karma! Thank you American sir!"
You: "Anytime."
Vishnu (muttering to himself): "What a dick"
- Vishnu Ramachandran
Re:Red Herring (Score:2, Funny)
Re:In a capitalist economy, stuff like this happen (Score:4, Funny)
What causes this isn't capitalism, it's power politics. If the social costs of extreme wealth were properly assesed to their source, then there would not be the extreme difference between the wealthy and the impoverished. But those with the power, in it's various forms (including money) craft the rules of the game to benefit themselves. This isn't capitalism. This is socialism of, by, and for the wealthy and powerful.
When you see extremes of wealth and poverty in the same civilization, you know the game is rigged. You many not know the details, but the fact is evident.