Inspired by TomHudson's latest Baptist rant, which reminded me of several sayings, such as:
"If brains were gunpowder, he couldn't blow his nose."
"If brains were gasoline, she couldn't power a pissant's scooter 'round the inside of a cheerio."
"If shit were sand, his head would be the Sahara."
"If bullshit were electricity, he could light the eastern seaboard."
By ALL means, feel free to weigh in with your favorites...

(Also known as recent history)(boredom potential near maximum)

The Mrs. is doing well, 3 down 3 to go on her latest chemo regimen - every time is an adventure, can't wait to see the shade and curl content when her hair grows back in (approx. 1 month after final treatment)...

I'm gainfully employed at a job I can leave at work when I leave work - it's not glorious, but then, it doesn't have to be, it fills my needs...

My mother's estate is finally winding towards a close sometime in July - it'd be truly ironic if it closed July 5th, as it was 30 years ago July 4th that our family moved into the house she was transported from...

My other projects are growing, in fits and starts mostly too slowly for my impatience, but growing... Bazi, book, gameshow, investments, inventions, website ideas...

My job includes some physical work and the Bazi is working, so the weight loss is continuing on my personal health front...

I've even had some spare time and seen a couple movies recently! "Forbidden Kingdom" was subtle like sledgehammer - worth watching only for the wire-fu choreography; "Iron Man" is the best of the Marvel genre to date! Casting kudos, Downey is perfect as Stark; Sweeney Todd on video, only because those songs still creep in when the family dines out - disturbing...

Our garden will contain a much higher edible percentage than in years prior, and we're looking into getting a bull calf from a local dairy farm - 6 months or so from now, beef will be what's for dinner...

Helping my younger step-son prepare for Army basic training...

And, in my copious *spare* time, reading my friends' /. JEs.

Childhood's End was one of my friends...

Yesterday, I messed up about as badly as one can while staying within the bounds of law: I allowed all of the stresses and frustrations I've been feeling both about my wife and my job to come to a head and, when my boss began to address some of my shortcomings at work (I had been short, curt, sometimes outright rude to some of my co-workers), to the point that when I heard her say "I'm tired of people telling me what an asshole you are" - I did the worst possible thing I could do - I proved her/them right: I snarled "Let me make this easy for you, I'll go get my stuff out of the office.", slammed three doors, cleared my belongings, turned over what I had of the company's property, and drove away.

I have since sent a sincere apology email asking for a second chance. I know they don't owe me anything, I'll be pleasantly surprised if I do get a positive response (and suspect that my wife's situation has the most to do with it - but then, if it weren't for her I wouldn't *need* to go back), but in the meantime, the pattern has hit again.

I get a job, I'm happy, grateful for whatever combination of circumstances got it for me - 3-5 months later, the balance shifts and most of what I see are shortcomings.

Short of a bullet to the brain or lobotomy, what is the best cure for being such an intolerable condescending ass? It seems as if all of my habits lead me to give back worse than I get, very self-destructive, sabotaging almost every chance I grasp at to get myself to a better place/state of being and dumping me backwards.

I've cleared my bookshelves of almost all of the self-help titles I own - I've read them, and re-read some, for whatever reason the behaviors described haven't internalized sufficiently, the impatience, sneer and snarl jump back up at the first (even imagined) slight.

Sorry for dumping. I'm waiting for the call that will reveal where I may go from here.

Post a comment to this thread, and I will:

1. Tell you why I befriended you (If I remember).
2. Associate you with something - fandom, a song, a color, a photo, etc..
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
6. Tell you my favorite user pic of yours (If I've seen one).
7. In return, you must post this in your Journal/Blag/whatever.

Well, we are moving forward with a new theme: "Today, she is alive (and free of symptoms)" If there is some Infinite, all-knowing, all-powerful being, and I ever get to face it, I'm going to do my level best to kick It in the most painful way I'm capable... giving me this angel of a wife, then visiting this cancer shit on her, not once, nor twice, three times she kicked its ass, here it is a 4th, and the treatments from the first 3 are not viable options - see, were it me, I'd say "Gee, I really was/am an asshole - well, it sucks, but I guess I earned it." She has never done *anything* in her life to deserve more than an occasional head cold karmically. Color me stupid, with a redeeming quality of having the sense to latch on to her, but I just don't get how anything like cause and effect enters into play here. unless It knows that doing this to her hurts me worse by far than it would doing it to me, in which case God is actually a vicious bastard indeed.
Tried the buddha thing, remove the attachment, remove the suffering - either I'm too weak, or my systems are hardwired to attach to at least a few things/people - the fewer the attachments, the stronger, though, at least that's how it seems, as if I have x quanta of attach-force that must be in play in order not to become a complete sociopath.
Anyway, today, she is alive. Despite the crap inside her body, she's alive. In discussing the current predicament, she, with her wisdom, suggests/demands life as normal as possible as long as possible, so... I'm back.
(oh, the new sig: we're trying some alternative and holistic approaches to health - I'm also needing to build additional income against a possible time she won't be working on anything beyond healing)

Real life (silly, to a spiritual person, physical life is no more 'real' than the intarweb life is to your average basement-dwelling hacker), anyway, real life physical world circumstances are currently demanding too much of my waking time: I know I'd be concerned if any of my friends on here dropped away without prior mention, so, to spare my friends that kind of worry, I'm letting you all know it's intentional. For those of you who pray, please add my wife's health to your prayers... I'll be back, I just have no idea when, or what state of mind I'll be in at that time. Thank you all for everything you've given me, including your kind attentions. For whatever my wishes might be worth, may peace be unto you and yours.

Mutual friends in common, and an enjoyment of R.A.H. and Spider Robinson's works.

Thank you to Pudge and the others who worked on the party - the pizza and soda were good, our hosts (Amazon) were very kind both in providing the space and with adding in some door prizes (I actually WON something - yay!) - contrary to stereotypes and beliefs, there are some very nice ladies who slashdot (yeah, I know, verbing nouns wierds language)... Met *nocomment*, thank you for the conversation... any time one can add a friend, that time has not been wasted.

Namaste'!
          The wife's hair is coming back in, a most becoming steel shade, tight curls (think ringlets only somewhat softened/relaxed), and all is well with herself, her mini-horses, and the progress in our yard.
          Me, I've gotten a new job, managing a business office for a local Home dealing with Alzheimer's and dementia-affected residents - got a whole new respect for all those others who've waded into a new position where their predecessor did NOT do the job, and, for the first time, the word "Manager" goes onto my resume' working for a company other than one of my many "learning experiences"!
          For as many times as I've whined, moaned, complained or outright bitched, let the record show that right now, today, in every situation/aspect/circumstance/whatever affecting my life where I have control and ownership, I am happy, content, and (although I don't know precisely to Whom or What) utterly and completely grateful. Perfection may be illusory, but all of the different progresses in all of the facets that matter are currently satisfactory.
          Here's wishing for each of you the experience of the sense of contentment and peace I'm feeling right now.

Okay, it's like this: I'm ignorant, not stupid. The difference in definition is that ignorance can be cured by education - stupid involves a willful refusal to admit ignorance.

To the point: I wish to learn how to write scripts: scripts that will replicate web pages; scripts that will force information input into a database into a multi-level market style matrix; script that will deliver multiple automatic responses via email on a set schedule; script that will batch payments to be processed via PayPal - all automatically (except the pay script, I want a one-button approval for that one) - It's a tall order - I've shopped around online, the providers of these items want upwards of $1200.00 for a packaged setup that (they say) will do what I'm imagining.

Other than A BAD Place for wanting to do these things, where exactly should I start in order to be learning as I actually do the above? Any solid beginner-plus books/online references/freeware (please, not trial-ware) alternatives I'm not finding?

Thank you!!

This post:

http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=306735&cid=20733021

Demonstrates it beautifully.

Although I hate to fan the flames of paranoia, the article I read this morning disturbed me greatly:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12370498/

It looks very much like someone is trying to justify adding Iran to the "U.S. Gov is at war with" list openly.

I'm shocked I beat Jeremiah to the punch on publishing the link to it.
Sorry folks, no matter how much we might like to hide our heads under local sand, our gub'mint has other ideas.

I want to create back-ups of several of my audio cassettes for use as CDs and/or digital files: I have most of the minimum tools: an audio cassette player, a PC with CD burner (running WinXP), and the blank CDs: My question is, will any of the so-called "conversion" softwares be required, or even desired? If so, which one(s), keeping budget in mind?
Thank you!

How's life? For me, pretty darn good at the moment: My angel and I celebrated 12 years of wedded bliss this weekend, went to Emerald Downs and watched the horses run - due to weather the crowds weren't too bad, the last race the rain had stopped, we got to stand right next to the rail, only eight feet from the starting gate... Her eldest and his wife gave us a 30+ gallon aquarium, kit, 7 African Cichlids and a Placostomus...
          Finished a drawing that'd been giving me fits: with benign essential tremors, I had been unable to get into the visual arts at all until I discovered digital: As it is, the works (due to my taking so long to learn the programs) take too long to be anything more than a hobby...
          The piece I did finish will be useful as part of the fund-raising efforts for our (Darla and my) non-profit foundation: Once our board accepts their nominations, we'll be filing all the paperwork, then I'll be able to devote a JE to what we're doing and planning on doing...
          Still employed, although being a long-term temp feels less secure than I'd like, it's not a difficult job in terms of physical labor or intellectual capacity, but it most definitely *is* challenging in terms of dealing with people...
          Back-shelved my book project in favor of yard-work during the warmer months - The goal is to get this property dealt with this year so that future years are "maintenance only" until we're ready for our last planned move...
          Bit off more than I could chew with reading: Having read several NLP books, I had put Mssr.s Bandler and Grinders' books about Ericksonian Hypnosis on my birthday wish list - now I have to go back and re-read "The Structure of Magic" I & II - odd coincidence, a TV show, "Mind Control with Derren Brown" came out shortly after I got the Ericksonian book - seeing the principles described in the book put into practice on un-suspecting individuals is somewhat unsettling...
          Unless I win the lottery or something else equally unlikely, retirement is now approximately 5 years, ten months away...
          How's life? Pretty darn good, thank you!
          How's yours?