Hi Journal, 's me again. Doing fairly well today. Fingers are working ok, legs are marginally better, mood is upbeat. Better still, for the jewelry fans, T-folk, and Pagans (especially Cybeline ones), I won the two eBay auctions I needed to make another jewelry project. I plan to make an ancient-style key, in fine silver, with this coin, a silver denarius of Cybele and Attis, and this gem, a baby-boy blue to baby-girl pink garnet. Should be quite a work, no?

Hi Journal, 's me again. My Jewelry Muse has been working overtime lately. One idea is a necklace, of rose gold, rose quartz and this pink peristerite. Sounds cool, no?

Meanwhile, I'm doing ok, just trying to stay cool. MS sucks.

Hi Journal, 's me again. Day 3 post-pulse, doing ok. Legs are a bit unstable, which probably means they're beginning to return to function as the plaque dies off to be replaced by new myelin. My typing is still improved, even during the "bad hours" of late afternoon.

Recently won some fire obsidian rough, and I can hardly wait to cut it. Think of the brightest broadflash Lightning Ridge black opal you've ever seen, in large cabochons. Yummy!

Also getting geared up to try making my own gold alloy for some of my stones that warrant a unique setting. I'll need to do it outside, as cadmium fumes are *nasty*.

At present, I'm hoping to be back to cutting gems by early next year. That'd sure be a nice birthday present, no?

Hi Journal, 's me again. Currently halfway through day 5 of what has become pulse 0x0A. Doing rather well, all considered. I can tell I'm on the right tack - I'm fast recovering the dexterity, if not yet the strength and flexibility, that I lost, starting with my left hand. Recovery is going to come LIFO, so the next return will be my left leg, followed by my bladder, right arm, right leg and, lastly, my sense of balance. While I may never fully recover, I expect to be nearly functional in another 2-3 years.

I'm fast heading to where PT and exercise will be as useful as medication. Who knows, I may even continue losing weight as my health returns. That'd be a nice benefit.

Hi Journal, 's me again. There's a break in the weather for the next ten days, so I started another Flagyl pulse today. So far, all is going great. I even got V to help me stand up, and I did 0x18 knee-bends. I'll take five 260mg activated charcoal capsules before bed, to pre-empt toxins from dying CPn.

I am going to defeat multiple sclerosis.

Hi Journal, 's me again. Doing ok, staying cool. Next pulse is on hold, pending cooler weather. Meanwhile, I'm keeping my jewelry muse entertained by investigating different-colored gold alloys. The most intriguing to me is 14kt blue-green gold, which should mesh well with my fave blue-green cabbing material, gem chrysocolla with malachite, better known as gem silica chrysocolla. I might even be able to make up 5+ grams of this alloy on my own - wouldn't that be cool? If that works, I might try making mokume gane, with 14kt rose gold, 14kt yellow, 14kt blue-green and .999 fine silver.

Hi Journal, 's me again. I just bought some great Ellensburg blue agate, at a steal. 8+ ounces that should cut out to several hundred carats at $25 a carat. Whee! This chunk is far better saturated than the chunk I won earlier, hence the higher per-carat finished price.

Hi Journal, 's me again. Finally paid for some recent eBay winnings, and bought some other stones too today. Some rough Ellensburg blue agate, a pair of E'blue agate earrings, a nice chunk of Australian opal, and a beautiful cabochon for an eventual ring. Coolamundo, no? I can hardly wait to get back to jewelry-making.

Hi Journal, 's me again. OK, I know this entry is likely to baffle and bewilder some of my readers, and for that I apologize. Sorry, folks, but this is me. I've thought about this for several years now, and it's time to share this with somebody besides Vikki. Here goes: I will never be the woman that I've felt I was all along.

No drugs, no clothes, no therapy, no surgery will ever make me have been female since birth. Nothing will give me the history I never had - menarche, puberty, being taller than the boys in my 6th grade class. I missed all the societal pressures placed on young women, all the bonding young women had as they grew up to adulthood. Nothing will ever give me that.

That said, I'm not unhappy with who I am. As a born-female, I'd have turned out very differently. Would I ever have dreamt of being a Formula 1 Gran Prix driver? Would I have been the old-school hacker, who specialized in removing copy-protection schemes? Would I have built forts in the backyard? Would I have been encouraged in riflery? I rather doubt it.

So. Here I am, just me, a tranny. I'll never be acceptable to lipstick lesbians, and tho it saddens me, I'm cool with that. I'll just be myself, a kind old tranny with cats. What more do I need?

Hi Journal, 's me again. Good weather, good day. Won a pair of Ellensburg blue agate earrings, to finish the set with the E'blue pendant won earlier, and the E'blue ring I made last year. Today was also a good day for "blue moonstone"; that set is nearly complete, too.

Still having trouble typing, tho.

Hi Journal, 's me again. Having a good day today. Won two auctions for rainbow moonstone cabs, and one real steal for Ellensburg blue agate rough. Earlier, I won two nice color-change garnets. I'm not done shopping yet 8^)

The moonstones are destined for a full set - ring, pendant, earrings and bracelet - in sterling silver, and the bigger garnet goes into a gold ring. The E'blue was way underpriced - it normally runs $10 per gram rough, and maybe $50 a carat finished. I am very pleased.

Hi Journal, 's me again. I watch too much tv with my cats ;)

CATS

good cats, good cats
whatcha gonna do
when Cally Co Cat purrs at you.
good cats, good cats
whatcha gonna do?
whatcha gonna do when they mew at you?
good cats, good cats
whatcha gonna do?
whatcha gonna do when they mew at you?
No, Cally won't give ya no bre-ake
Dainters won't give ya no break
Fraidycat'll give ya no break
Not even the Princess, she won't give ya no break
hey hey good cats, good cats
whatcha gonna do?
whatcha gonna do when they mew at you?
good cats, good cats
whatcha gonna do?
whatcha gonna do when they mew at you!

Hi Journal, 's me again. I just discovered a twisted, funny show - Dead Like Me. Way cool. Watch it. It's amusing.

Hi Journal, 's me again. Well, I've now won two color-change garnets. One more to go, and then some rough cabbing material and I'm done shopping for a bit. Wheee what fun!

Last night, in the air-conditioned bedroom, I totally annihilated my Shisen-Sho high score. 24x12, gravity, no help at all, in 12 minutes and 11 seconds, for a new score of 1042. Not bad for a cripple, eh?

Hi Journal, 's me again. I'm doing rather well today. Typing well, despite being kind of warm. Had four sterling silver ring castings arrive in today's mail. All are for 25x18mm cabs that I cut early last year. I'm leaning towards setting the larimar, copper complex and sugilite, maybe the red horn coral too. I want to plate the copper complex ring in 18kt green gold, and maybe do the sugilite ring in 18kt yellow gold. Should be fun, no?

Both the copper complex and red horn coral have already-finished companion belt buckles - here and here (warning, the pics are rather large). That's why I was so excited to find ring castings for those stones. Add a tie-clip and they'll be complete sets for men. Cool beans, no?

I've got plans for more cool jewelry, too, using more color-change garnets. These are pretty blue, changing to pinks and reds. I'm thinking maybe 14kt yellow gold, a ring and a pendant, later this year when money's available again.

The weather here is going to suck for the next week or so. I'll be holed up in the air-conditioned bedroom. I can't wait to finally be enough better that summers are tolerable again.