Journal GMontag's Journal: Things I have Learned Lately 23
This was from several years ago, December of 2003 I think. When I added the link right below these comments and saved it, Slashdot tossed it into the FireHose.
More Things That I Have Learned
Yesterday I learned from Governor Howard Dean that the current administration has the wrong number of troops in Iraq and that we are at war with the wrong countries. Gov. Dean's latest numbers are different from his old numbers, but they are still right and the President is still wrong.
I learned that Mozart's music has the wrong number of notes.
Also, from Governor Dean, I learned that shutting down news outlets promotes free speech and that he has inside information that the Saudi's gave the President a briefing on the 9/11/2001 attack before the attack happened. I suppose all of the Governor's get this info but the only time it should be revealed is after you advocate shutting down news channels that you don't like.
Today I learned from Sen. Kerry, who was in Vietnam back-in-the-day, that we have the wrong number of troops in Iraq and we did not talk about it long enough. A few weeks ago I learned from him that we should not have had anybody there to begin with and that voting to send troops there, but not sending them, is that Vietnam Veteran's strategy for victory.
Several years ago I learned that the way to expand participation in US elections is by giving literacy tests. This bit of intellectualosity was from a fellow college student, but he was getting a "real degree" of the BA persuasion. He was also upset that his trips to/from South America (he harvested orchids from the jungle and sold them in the USA) resulted in his being delayed by the authorities at customs while "the fascists in suits" were not bothered at all.
His advocacy of literacy tests boiled down to an ignorance of the American People for not voting the same way he wanted to vote, but he never voted that way either because his candidates "had no chance."
I have learned that the Pacifica Radio Network is being silenced. I hear them say that several times per hour on the occasions that I listen to them.
Today I learned from loucura! that an 8% market share is a crushing monopoly and qualifies a firm as a megaconglomerate strangleholding class business.
Yesterday I learned from loucura! that all of the shareholders of Diebold are Republicans. I wonder if Governor Dean is holding back that info too?
The Boston Globe taught me that following a policy of "case-by-case" examination is a change in policy when your intelligence investigation is complete and you allow the captured terrorist have visitors.
The United Nations taught me that any amount of Capitalism in North Korea is too much.
Today I learned that StB does not eat tofu. Whoda ever guessed that one?
TechnoLust is still all loopy over Boo and I am glad that he warns us about Boo posts in the titles of his JEs
Today I learned that some people who read my Journal do not appreciate Paris Hilton's hot bod and slow brain as much as me or the people of Chicagoland.
eglamkowski informed me today that the french diplomatic corps went on strike for 24 hours. It was almost like someone telling me that I was looking at an invisible object with no mass.
Today I learned that San Francisco State University classes are taught by Communists. Well, actually, today I learned that San Francisco State University exists. I would have figured they had Commie teachers if I had known they were around before. A Bulgarian friend at work, who read the story mentioning them, said "yes, it sounds very familiar" about the author's experiences.
The other day I learned that Ann Coulter agrees with me that lots of that gay marriage crap is crap. She finally wrote the same observations about that as I have written on that other marriage scam.
Yesterday I learned that even when cops do something correctly (a rare occurrence in my experience), they are still wrong. If a big fat guy sleeping off his PCP in front of a White Castle burger joint starts giving paramedics crap, the cops are supposed to give him a joint or the big fat guy will hit them, call them racist names and die. This creates big problems for the cops. So, if I ever become a cop, and I would be one of the good guy cops, I need to remember to give violent bums PCP and pot.
Over the years I have learned that the best way to run a train is on electromagnets rather than wheels. I am still fuzzy as to why "the man" is "keeping this down." I always thought that was gravity keeping it down and wheels resisted gravity without the need of a constant electron flow, but I ain't no physicist and I only got a BS degree.
I have learned that people who announce that they are intellectuals and decree that I am not (I am glad that they do not include me in their group too) rarely know who Eisenstein was and spend the next half hour trying to tell me about Einstein. (pssst... any intellectuals reading this, they are different people. no I am not making a low-forehead joke)
Years ago I figured out that there is a independent thinkers group who distinguish themselves from the rest of us by thinking alike. No thought that non-independant thinkers have is correct due to a lack of some quantity of enlightenment. Through further investigation I have discovered that they have some sort of secret certification. The way they identify each other is by talking like Noam Chomsky on acid and speed.
Political Correctness is all of the former and none of the latter.
Over the past three years I have learned that George Bush is stupid because: he is not an independent thinker; he pronounces nuclear the same way as a famous US Navy Nuclear Engineer pronounces it; he always picks the wrong number of soldiers; he has an accent. All of his secret plans are known in full by everybody who has a microphone and hates his accent.
Also, in the past three years, I learned that you can somehow make billions off of stock that you sold three years ago if you get elected to anything. Unless all of the places where you used to work go bankrupt, you will make them rich too just by having a government job. Unless all of the people you were friends with die, they automatically become rich because you are Vice President. This is as puzzling as the train problem, but I do have a Finance degree plus an MBA equivalent and still can't figure this one out. Perhaps if I had a BA in Comparative pre-Sandscrit Literature with a concentration in unwritten nonverbal poetry it would be more clear. Working as a forest-raping orchid thief might help too.
Last week I learned that Senators who delay dinner for soldiers care about the soldiers, but Presidents who man the chow line and feed the soldiers are grandstanding.
About a year ago I learned that if you don't put up with corporate misbehavior and prosecute them you are soft on big business. If you are out of office and try to lean on the people who replaced you to let the misbehaving business "slide," you are just fine. That is when I heard of Enron.
Not long after that I learned that corporations selling electricity to States "in the red" for a high price is bad, but the same State selling the same electricity to others at an even higher price is just fine.
This year I learned that Barbara Streisand is a genius who spells as bad or worse than me and Arnold Schwarzenegger is an idiot because he has an accent.
Also this year I learned that Hispanics are not to be trusted with a gavel.
Over the past few years I have learned that forcing people to work for the government means you care. Killing babies and old people means you care more.
During the 2000 election I learned that flunking out of the Vanderbilt Divinity School and Georgetown Law School makes you a genius, especially if you sound like one of the "fab five" while you speak and you shared your pot with the Secret Service in Viet Nam. Graduating from Yale undergrad and Harvard Graduate Business school makes you an idiot if you speak like a normal person and were a fighter pilot in a National Guard unit.
Defeating the Soviet Union without a nuclear war is the most evil act any person has done in recorded history.
From Robert Downey Jr's father I learned that parents sharing dope with their teenagers is bad. I also learned that the only people who did not know this were the people who were stoned all of the time. Best to save your dope for the big fat stoned guys who's mothers taught them to beat people up with bags of White Castle burgers.
I have learned (Score:2)
I hate to do it, but I'm considering removing you from my Friends list. Maybe I'll just browse through your journal manually every once in a while to see what you've been yammering about. :-)
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
Sir:
Get a life and start contributing to society... ;o)
Re:I have learned (Score:1)
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
As you well know I couldn't dissagree with you more on certain political issues. However I often find myself agreeing with you in supprising ways and even when I don't agree with you, you are often funny.
If I ever tire of your JE's as you say nobody held a gun to my head to put you on my friends list in the first place and I do know how to remove you should I decide to do so.
BTW the bit about the orchid stealing forest-raper is hysterical. Mush-brained idiots like him give every group they a
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
IIRC he was more of the "orchids for me and not for thee" variety. Fine for us to freeze as long as he controls the heat.
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
Those are even worse than the luddite types.
My usual response to them is "what exactly makes you think you are more worthy than me, asshole"
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
The response is always that they are moving for equalness and they never admit that wharever choice removal system they advocate, the choices are somehow equal
It is much like chatting with a psychiatric patient.
Re:I have learned (Score:2)
I missed the JE about Hitchens farting.
Please repost
v/r
Red
So you have to wonder... (Score:2)
oh wow (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Re:Who says I don't eat tofu? (Score:2)
Ah, I had you confused with you, LOL!
Re: (Score:2)
Would this be an appropriate time to say (Score:1)
Re: (Score:2)
Eh? (Score:2)
I still fail to see how breaking up large media companies is anything but a good thing. We don't live in a country with a free market, since the government has already got it's fingers in the pie, it should act responsibly in the interests of the nation as a whole. Also, I never advocated spl
Re:Eh? (Score:2)
You seemed to be defending Dean's absurd claim that an 8% market share is too high, and having "only" 11 major alternatives in 90% of the market is somehow bad, so you need to break up Fox for "ideological reasons".
I still fail to see how breaking up large media companies is anything but a good thing. We don't live in a country with a free market, since the government ha
Re:Eh? (Score:1)
You know, that would explain *a lot* of things about him.
Ironic don't you think (Score:2)
So now... (Score:2)
10 times a day works for me, rant on!
Re:So now... (Score:2)
I am usually invoking this Eisenstein [abamedia.com] as in: "Nice try Eisenstein, but Communism is nonsense" then the "lecture" begins and I try to listen patiently. When they are finished talking I usually say "That would be fine if we were talking Physics, but we were talking about your Propaganda."
Will add your Eisenstein for discussions about prime numbers and anything quadratic
Hotels in France and all that (Score:1)
Well, as Smallville last night was a rerun which my wife and I had seen the last half of the first time, we watched the first half of it, and then switched over to the Illustrious Fox Network, and checked out the bizarre phenomenon that is "The Simple Life". First, the fact that they are so lazy and stupidly decietful ("Let's hide the empty milk bottles so