i.e. SCROTUS

Actually, having lived through it, the C programmer's negative reaction was to C++...

we should measure his compensation in distressed babies

lol, I can beat that. my employer went into the investment business and manages the funds in their 401K (and charges their employees fees)

(their principal business has nothing to do with financial management)

I've always enjoyed how the named the opposite of a defined benefit plan a 'defined contribution' plan instead of an 'undefined benefit' plan...

yes, they're called "Republicans for Obama"

you sure it wasn't the masturbation?

no, it will be "The scientists failed because they didn't convince us! It's their fault!"

God saving us seems to be the rationale for trashing the planet.

or ask how many believe in astrology...

Fun Fact: Jesus wasn't born on Christmas day!

if you'll just fill out this trouble ticket, we'll put out your house fire. tomorrow.

I don't think you've learned them.

well, that explains why the project is always behind schedule and over budget...

I think that's called being a parent