I wonder why he never thought to duct tape the beer can to the steering wheel and drink from a straw.

Probably because when he made sharp a turn the beer would spill out.

Do you find yourself deliberately ignoring office politics, overheard conversations, open documents or emails, etc as you go about your work? If not, how do you preserve the impartiality/neutrality which seems (to my novice mind) necessary to be effective in this position? In either case: how do you deal with the possibility of accidentally learning something you're not supposed to know? E.g. troubleshooting a user's email program when they've left sensitive/eyes-only emails open on their workstation. Are there protections or policies that are standard, or is this a legal and professional gray-area?"

Let's start in order: Yes, I ignore office politics. I'm there to do my job.

No, I don't ignore overheard conversations. I listen in to learn what's going on behind the scenes and make mental notes for future use. Offices with women are generally the best for the amount of gossip you hear, especially about other women.

No I don't ignore open documents or emails. Does that mean I root through things? Of course not, but if you leave it open and I'm in your office waiting for some poorly coded software to install/upgrade, I'll be nosy and look at what's open and, like above, make mental notes. It's fun to read some of the HR documents, especially when people are getting written up.

As to impartiality, I'm there to do my job. Whatever I hear or read I keep to myself until such time it might come in handy (I'm so waiting to win the lottery so I can let loose on things I've overheard/read).

To your last point, you're there to do a job. Do it. What you read or hear stays with you. You don't say a word to anyone, inside or outside the organization about what you came across.

Generally, organizations have policies in place which state you can't reveal inside information to the outside world so if you come across something sensitive, such as personnel matters or impending mergers, you can't say anything. There is no gray area.

If you're familiar with the show Hogan's Heroes, you are like Sergeant Schultz: "I know nothing!"

Don't you mean cross Ebola with the common cold?

Oh right, that would be a terrible, terrible thing.

And when it was rumored that Chrysler was introducing another brand in the early 2010s, we "knew" that Plymouth was coming back. It didn't. RAM was split from Dodge instead.

Wow, news to me. Seriously, I am not being sarcastic. I just went to dodge.com and RAM Truck was an option: but it took me to a different site with a warning that I was leaving dodge.com. I was not aware of this until this evening.

The problem? Just as in the UK, the US employees weren't getting paid.

Who needs to get paid? Everyone knows software is free and there is no cost associated with creating it.

Silly rabbits, thinking they should get paid for their work.

"Machinery" is from 1947. Back then you didn't type your code, you wire-wrapped it.

Become the sole developer for Blackberry app!

Marketing suggested that now it should be called the Skim Milky Way.

It's the inflation in play here, just like in the economy, the units of measurement are being stretched now, so the same mass measured in different units gives a nominally different answer

A better example would be the sizing of women's clothes. What is now a size 4 used to be a size 6 a few years ago but because women are getting fatter, the sizes had to change to make people feel good about themselves.*

* Men don't have to worry as much because their sizes are measured in inches.

I cancelled my Comcast cable service last week. Walked into the office, handed them my equipment and told them I wanted to cancel my account. The person behind the counter checked in the equipment, had me sign a form indicating I had returned all the equipment and pay the prorated amount I owed.

The only thing he asked me is if I was going with someone else to which I said no, I could no longer justify the cost.

I was in and out in just over a minute. I waited in line significantly longer than that.

Sidenote, I received a notice in the mail from Comcast that for a small additional monthly fee I could upgrade my service to one of the following. Obviously my cancellation hasn't worked its way through the system yet.

Will be taking Tolkien's "Leaf, by Niggle" and turning it into a clone of The Swamp Thing.

Can they print a whistle in only three hours?

After all, these things go for 25 cents a pop at a party store.

this person had nothing better to do with their life, no outside activities to occupy their time, no significant (or insignificant) other to fool around with, or anything else that "normal" people would do.

Clearly they are so bored and don't have enough work to do that they had to find something to occupy their life.

Congratulations! You are the shining example of someone living in their parents basement.

If Gazans disarmed then Israel would have absolutely no grounds to strike it

Thank you for pointing out the hypocrisy of the situation. People who are under occupation, subject to the whims of a foreign country are supposed to roll over and play dead and cannot, in any way shape or form, defend themselves or retaliate against their oppressors.

Funny I didn't see the Jews in Warsaw roll over and play dead, I didn't see the Jews before the creation of Israel roll over and play dead under British rule. Apparently everyone else is supposed to roll over and play dead except Israelis who are the poor, oppressed people and so should be able to defend themselves.

Again, thank you for the hypocritical stance.

So what do you think should be Israel's response to the constant bombing of their country?

So what do you think should Palestine's response to the constant checkpoints, blockading of their ports, airport and border crossings, as well as the occupation and continued confiscation of their land by Israel should be?

See the problem? One side says, "Look! See how evil they are. They [insert some random nonsense]. That is why we do what we do."

Then the other side says, "See! See how they are. They [insert some random nonsense]. That is why we do what we do."

The fact is, Israel has two parties as part of its government who are just as hellbent on the destruction of Palestine and the removal of all Palestinians from Israel and the land they want to confiscate as those who claim Hamas wants to do the same to Israel, YET no one has a problem with these de facto terrorist groups being part of the Israeli government. It's only when Hamas gets its voice in the Palestinian government that people have a problem.

The double standard is truly staggering when you consider Israel was South Africa's lone partner during the Apartheid regime, and it, Israel, learned well from those policies, policies which it now implements with impunity because its lobby has bought and paid for the the U.S. Congress to do its bidding, regardless of what happens.

So when you say what should Israel's response to X be, turn it around and ask the same of what Palestine's response should be to Y. You'll never hear any Israeli spokesperson answer the question, "What would you do if you had to live under the same conditions" because to do so would expose the hypocrisy of their position.