So that means they are "Not in this CenturyLink"?

I don't know if I would worry about personal threats from these types of scammers. A cursory check of the information that they even have on file for you would indicate that they don't really know anything except the phone number that they just dialed. When you get a call from "The windows support department", ask them all sorts of questions like:

What is the name of the company that they work for?
How do they know that my machine is infected with a virus?
Which computer is infected? (I have multiple PCs...)
Who has paid them to provide this service for me?
If my PC has been sending internet packets because of spyware infections, and they have detected this, then certainly they would know the IP address of the machine that is doing it.

If the caller cannot even answer these basic questions, then you know it's a scam.

It would be more obscure, but just as funny, to use the name David Lightman.

Thankfully, my parents would never even be able to fall for this scam, because they have dialup.

You can either go online, OR you can talk to the scammer, but not both.

That's OK, there are still Microsoft Solutions...

That's because I'm outside your window with a bluetooth jammer.

If you need an obscure battery right away, try Batteries+, but be prepared to pay big time for it.

If you need an obscure battery and can wait, there are often resellers on Amazon that will get you what you need DIRT CHEAP! If it turns out to be crap, you can just be thankful that you paid a fraction of what you would anywhere else, and then try somewhere else.

I'm just surprised that you even have INTERNET ACCESS.

Why is version control $500 per person? Haven't they heard of Subversion or GIT? These are problems that have already been solved!

I wouldn't worry until they at least start to conquer a third dimension. These little bots just jiggle around on the floor.

If they have 1024 bots that can assemble into a shape, then the bots should millibots (one onethousandth of a shape).

Katamari Damacy.

But who would buy it? Only the stupid would do such a thing, and they already have enough stupid, stupid!

Conversely, why are the text fields too small? Would you want to hire anyone whose browser size is 640x480 for a technical job? What is this, 1994?

Right. It's finding a task IMPOSSIBLE that will kill you.