Come visit me on Trollaxor.com!
"Hey guys. I'll follow you down," Eric beamed at the group of guys.
"Fuck off, freak," One of the guys yelled back as the rest of the group busted out laughing.
Eric choked back tears that were welling up. "I am not a freak. Being a plushie-lover is normal! My mom told me so," Eric yelled.
He spun around and stormed back into his room. "I know where I can be appreciated," Eric muttered to himself as he started up his 386 running Linux. The box, which he got from some stinky Linux hippie in exchange for tossing his salad, started up with a high pitched whine.
After five minutes, he was on Slashdot, a well known web-log for all kinds of sexual fetishes. Eric gasped at what he saw. The Turd Report had made another post about his daily turd. Eric turned red with anger. "I'll show you," Eric said to himself as he hit the 'reply' button. His fingers quivered as he typed his response: 'You are lame.' Eric grinned and hit 'submit'. He waited tem minutes then checked for a reply. There was none. "I shut him up but good," Eric proclaimed.
Thoughts of greatness started running thru Eric's mind. The Slashbots would cheer him for standing up to the Turd Report. Taco might even email him a congratulation. It might even be front page news on Slashdot! People would link to it in their sig files and it would certainly be the talk of everyone's journals. Everyone would love him despite his plushie fetish. Oh, his wonderful plushie. Elmo should share this moment. The thought of Elmo made Eric a bit frisky. Eric was hung like a doorbell and it was rock hard. He fumbled under the bed for Elmo and pulled him out. The sounds of Elmo proclaiming, "That tickles!" was hear thru-out the dorm for hours.
I will not be posting tommorrow. I am undergoing surgery for my kidney disorder. If I go to 'The Big Toilet in the Sky' as it were, I have left instructions to leave my username and password for this account somewhere on the net to be found. Take care and if I bite it, good luck with the Turd Report account! --
Trollaxor: satan is residing in my anus.
ME: Odd, have you been using Linux. That might explain your anal satan infection.
Trollaxor:
Trollaxor: not a bit!
Trollaxor: i think it may be residue from hanging around slashdot too much though.
ME: Could be. Have you touched any Linux trade mags or come in contact with any Linux zealots?
Trollaxor: hmm.
Trollaxor: no, and no...
ME: Is there an OSS conferance in your area?
Trollaxor: no i checked that out... none.
ME: Or is the wind blowing from the Holland, Michigan area?
Trollaxor: from the north it is!
Trollaxor: that's it...
Trollaxor: Rob Malda's stinky shit breath is being carried down here.
ME: That explains it.
ME: My other thought was that a Linux Ninja might have shot you with a linux tipped ass-dart.
Trollaxor: soon i will have to expel a foul, vile piece of feces.
ME: Another Linux Zealot will have been born.
Trollaxor: LOL
ME: Show it the EULA from a MS disk and it will be killed.
Trollaxor: i think i'll try to flush him first
ME: Or shine the glow of a monitor hooked to any non-linux machine and it wil wither and die.
ME: Sweet Christ no!
ME: Linux Zealots just grow stronger in the sewer.
ME: You must kill it first.
ME: Once it gets in the sewer it starts it's migration to Holland, Michigan.
Trollaxor: i thin this is another convo that should be posted to your journal
ME: Once it makes it to the Slashdot Compound the life cycle is complete and it get a slashdot account and start posting.
ME: ok.
ME: After 2 weeks it will have mod points and a +1 bonus.
ME: Linux using child molester: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A2747-2002Jan5.html
ME: That's where I live!
ME: Tyree's black Mitsubishi Eclipse sat alone in the parking lot yesterday, with some bills and a bag of fast-food debris on the passenger seat.
ME: That sentance is very telling. He looks like a Linux user.
Trollaxor: that's creepy, but AFA slashdot goes, hilarious
ME: You see his pic?
Trollaxor: yeah
ME: Tyree's member profile on the Yahoo Internet service uses the name "master for teen slavegirls." The page displays a photograph of Tyree and lists his hobbies as "Training young female slaves to serve me in all ways." His "latest news" was that he was "looking for young slavegirls to train in real life."
ME: Linux really fucks you up, I guess.
Trollaxor: it does.
Trollaxor: this may be the subject of a new article.
ME: Looks like he was a Solaris user.
ME: I am searching for him on Google
ME: He is a Linux user tho. I am certain that is what lead him down this path.
Trollaxor: it's a gateway to faggotry!
ME: Well, he kidnapped a girl. So, technicaly, it is not faggorty.
ME: It leads to various perversions. In this case child molesting.
Trollaxor: i am sure he was mistaken
Trollaxor: he thoght they were boys
ME: In Katz's case, little boys. In Taco's case anything with an anus.
Trollaxor: LOL
ME: Timmah prefers to have fellow linux users shit on a glass coffee table while he jerks off from below.
Trollaxor: LOL!
ME: ChrisD slides a 12 black dildo in and out of his ass while reading archived posts from comp.lang.c++ on google.
ME: Michael pays male hookers to smash small woodland creatures under their feet while another boy spanks him. Michael dresses like Himler and recites old Hitler speaches during the process.
Trollaxor: it hurts it hurts
Trollaxor: my boss is askin me what ss o funny
Trollaxor: oh god
ME: Jamie prefers to dress in his crochless 'Clifford the Big Red Dog' suit and go to the dog park. He smears peanut butter on his genitals and anus and romps thru the park.
ME: Rob goes to the old folks home leans over a chair and moans 'Please fuck me' to anything that passes.
ME: Did I forget anyone?
ME:
ME: Do with that what ever you like.
Trollaxor: hemos
ME: Hemos prefers to have his genitals incased in plaster of paris. He then watches the rest ofht eslashdot crowd in their perversions. He likes the restraining feel it gives.
ME: He then frees himself and performs auto-erotic asphyxiation while watching 'Beaches'.
Trollaxor: HAHAHHA
"Don't drop acid, take it pass-fail!" -- Bryan Michael Wendt