The Turd Report's Journal: The Turd Report 01/14/2002

I had two Whoppers w/Cheese and no lettuce last night. It is the first fast food I have had for several months. My body reacted by turning it into a turd with brick-like hardness. It was a big turd, about 5cm across and 30cm long. It was a generic brown. It took a solid minute of pushing to get it out. It stunk like cod fish oil; which, due to my medications, is not shocking. The turd was so hard, it would not flush. It just sat there. A janitor had to come and extract it from the bowl. It was carried out in a little baggie. People retched. I laughed. i rate this turd as an 9, due to trouble it caused others and making people want to barf.