So this is probably my one of only a few Cleveland Browns entries this year. It just is too much of a soulkilling occupation to have to write about a team that breaks your heart all the time. Last year I decided to try my George Costanza: do the exact opposite as every instinct I have is wrong. Sure, the Cleveland Browns still only had a 6-10 campaign but *shrugs* at least then I could drown my sorrows instead of reliving each aggravating loss.

King of the Streets

Bruno Kirby, a veteran character actor known for playing the best friend in two of Billy Crystal's biggest comedies "When Harry Met Sally" and "City Slickers," has died. He was 57.

Damn... turns out he just got diagnosed with Leukemia. Really, the guy was on this season of Entourage! He was still out there grinding!

Help spread the word by sending out personalized messages of Samuel L. Jackson demanding that you, yes you, should go see SNAKES ON A PLANE . Phonespam all your friends! We are just two weeks away from the reckoning!!!

Shoot me. Shoot me right in the goddamn face. I guess the Browns are going to beat out the Indians for breaking my heart: at least the Indians wait until the season to crush my hopes.

Reading back to Ian McShane, before this season of Deadwood on HBO, who was interviewed by the New York Times Arts & Leisure section, on how the dialogue in the show is so strange because where it was common in the period to speak with a single inversion in a sentence, David Milich is inclined to layer two or three inversions in a sentence.

Parents of the world, do not give your children the following first names:

The New Trailer's out! He kills a snake with a SPEARGUN!!! Be ready: August 18th!!!

My band is your favorite. But that isn't important. My band is your girl's favorite, the one her hand will hover over in the car for a moment, then return to the wheel. She'll drive, eyes on the road, and begin to sing along without noticing. You watch the buildings or the fields or the brown cobble beaches pass by.

Discounting myself and not counting multiple-accounts I have met 18 people from /. face-to-face. 14 of those I only met first through /.

Where's the strikethrough tag so we can put x's around Al-Zarqawi's name?

Somebody needs to get that video and put it up on YouTube. FYI it's dark and Hell is hot.

Moving your worldly shit leaves its mark on you. Contusions, burst capillaries, punctures from dull objects.

Bilirubin, biliverdin. Ah bay say day vee-ta-min.

She does this because she loves you so much.

Waiting for ENG 102 ...you fell up out of bed, onto your feet, your jeans slid up your legs and they carried you back out of my door, down the stairs, off in your car and out of my life.

Gone- out of my memory.

There is nothing like a good book- but all things equate to it. Nothing's like a good blowjob then. And goodness is both universal and immutable. We have no more conversations. But there is little truth to people's declarations of goodness.

Blinds hold in that blue sky, green cumulonimbus oak tops bustling. Boy, you've got a life to live. Things to do. This is not a household without a:

dining table, four chairs, stools at the breakfast bar, tall bookshelves not plastic bags held up to the ceiling, rugs for the long wood floors, paper... what, why is all of your prints leaning against the walls? What is this? Are you waiting? The grout doesn't set itself. The tile must be clean!